45 posts • joined 25 Apr 2009
I Love New Words
I can't WAIT to see the meaning of the word blabbergasm in a forthcoming dictionary. A state of sheer ecstasy while engaging in social media resulting in a flood of effluent. Usually after using a controlled substance. A condition common to Twitter users.
Somewhere in the Clouds.......
Someday Britain will wake up and find that the London Financial District has been successfully migrated overnight to Lagos. Fortunately being an English speaking country business will continue uninterrupted and Abu Dabai will purchase the vacant real estate from the owners for a pittance. Britain will then apply for membership in the African Union.....
All those unopened, shrink wrapped boxes gathering dust on Admin's storage closet shelves awaiting disposal years hence......
Am I Reading Variety?
The lead in to the story sounds like you recruited writers from Variety? Google's Off Handset Max Tax Axe trick ....or something.....
As the President's speech progressed it seemed as if the smoke and mirrors came sharply into focus and I remembered how much the truth means to a man who can lie so repeatedly if it serves his purpose. So no, I don't believe his words but will closely monitor his actions.
Government to Apple: "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated. We will add your distinctive biological and technological essence to our own." Followed by a barrage of IRS agents, EPA examiners, FTC bureaucrats, lawyers, image consultants, crisis management experts, journalists, financial advisers, and irate shareholders.
Windows 8 Conspiracy
I think that the whole Windows 8 project was a vast conspiracy between Microsoft and the Indian government as a scheme to expand their online support industry there......Microsoft was receiving commissions on the number of support calls which exceeded the license fees from actual sales.....
The goal was full employment for India.....adding hundreds of millions of support reps....
Having owned a mac mini for years I wasn't even aware that intel (who also supplies the CPU for the Mac Mini) made their own desktop bricks. Looking at the specs and the prices Intel's offering is rather feeble. I find this all strange and a waste of time and effort.
PS4's should be seen in your local landfill soon! Not content with their recent reported loss Sony appears to have decided that it was not large enough. They're unable to connect in more ways than just video displays or external hard drives.
A REAL Bargain?
$549 for an unlocked 16GB 5C? A REAL bargain? Nuts.
The government printing office is busily printing tens of millions of coloring books and crayola just received a huge contract. The "Navigators" who are color blind are being pensioned off and we have received absolute assurances that the problem was really the inability of the target groups to read and write. The Common Core curriculum should ensure that for all future generations and ALL government systems will gradually be switched over to the new method.
Suggest playing Clarence Carter's 'Patches' during updates because they've been so sorry lately.....
Has anyone else noticed that with each improvement to iPhones and Galaxys the IQ level of their owners seem to drop? Concentrating all your energies into your gadget will probably result in near-sighted stylus-like fingered primate with the IQ of Chimpanzees.....
Bugs as Income Centers
I've never been ceased to be amazed at how MS took troubleshooting it's own bugs into courseware and "çertifications" to be valued and prized. What a modern scientific world we live in where errors, mistakes and spagetti code becomes the basis of wealth.
This article made me think that perhaps Adam and Eve were 9 feet tall and God cut them off at their first set of knees........Gods will do that you know.....or godlike creatures....or creatures who think of themselves as godlike.....
Re: Lonely Here
Who are the other two? I've always wondered when I would find another kindred spirit.
Another Executive Order Coming?
Looks like time for another last minute Executive Order by the Obama Administration to the party with the most campaign contributions.
It's difficult to imagine anyone doing serious business or sensitive correspondence who would ever use Cloud Services now or in the future. The whole concept of big data will have to undergo a complete change in architecture and security and the legal questions resolved to the users satisfaction before it will ever again receive serious consideration. The entire climate of surveillance and government access will force most of these transactions out of the hands of those mucking it up today.
One axe for 4,000? The guy must be a regular at triathalons.
Ding, Dong, Dell
Why would ANYONE buy a Dell ANYTHING after they all but announced they were going to take a long, hot bath and open their veins? Paging Carl Icahn!
How about, "We'llShortlyAbandonYouDrive"? or "OnlyAsLongAsWeMakeMoneyDrive" ??
Microsoft's Own Weapon of Mass Destruction
Steve Balmer should have a special niche in business school libraries with a bust of him holding a Surface RT...His own WMD that Microsoft turned on itself...
Re: Nostaglia isn't what it used to be...
How much simpler it was. Either or was mainly a function of your IT budget. Netware was more expensive and required a higher level of support staff. The MS products were evolving very quickly then and support cost less.
Note to author: Please ignore those warehouses filling up with unsold fondleslabs and understand the difference between the concepts of manufactured and sold. Adolf Hitler in March 1945 thought he was 18 months behind where he wanted to be also.
Resistance is Futile
We are the Microsoft. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated and your technology will add to our perfection. Or something.
Mr. Ballmer states that the 'problem' is that there are just not enough fondleslabs. The fondleslab manufacturers whose warehouses are filling up with unsold fondleslabs question whether or not Mr. Ballmer secretly suffered some undiagnosed mental collapse a year or two ago and that there are just not enough similarly diagnosed mental patients in the market for a new fondleslab. I tend to agree with them.
What Can We Expect?
Does this mean the astronomically high price of their chips will come down? Or is that awaiting a burst of inflation to resolve?
And the other secret orders?
.......while secretly ordering them to share it but with a penalty only if they get caught. So we'll hear of no more spying on anybody by anybody through anybody....or else!
Give 'em a Break!
Come On! The blood sucking parasitic horde of lawyers employed by these two benighted corporate pugilists need to eat too. Well, perhaps if they aren't fed they'll resort to cannibalism. On second thought maybe it's best this gets settled out of court.....Right!
We Would NEVER Target Political Enemies
So besides the IRS we have to worry about them turning off our phones too?
Gives New Meaning to the Word Obscurity
I can't wait to renew my contact lens prescription.
Spread the Failure?
When your two newest flagship products are failures AND overpriced you have no choice but to go to direct sales.
MS Ignores All Past UI Research
Touch screens have been tried before. The research, conducted almost thirty years ago, concluded that desktop touch screens were ergonomically harmful resulting in 'gorilla' arm fatigue. Several major players HAD touch screen systems utilized mainly in education and testing. They ALL ultimately failed because of user complaints.
What's HER secret?
This tirade has left me the distinct impression that perhaps Ms. Rometty utilizes some controlled substances to increase HER performance.
Washed away by an unexpected cloud burst?
The Only Blocks Here Are the Blockheads at High Court
Open DNS. Address spoofing. Aliases, a few simple sixty second solutions to negate all the high cost legal talent squandered on stupidity. Or perhaps by stupidity......
Does Anyone Remember HAL?
No, not the HAL from Arthur Clarke's 2001 series but the overlay developed in the 80's in the pre-Windows dark ages? Metro reminds of that and the concept will not fly nor resurrect itself like the Phoenix. Another layer upon a faulty foundation never works out.http://www.theregister.co.uk/Design/graphics/icons/comment/unhappy_32.png
More Microsoft Bloatware?
Can this be Zune II?
When developing with MS products it is often helpful to depict the project as a giant bowl of pasta. Any new pasta added will never have the same form as the old and after a period of time the bowl will resemble nothing anyone would want to consume.....
I have a theory that these events are part of a vast conspiracy to create new scripts for daytime soap operas. I'm reluctant to publish my book in fear of the inevitable lawsuits that will follow.....
Another Moral Dilema Solved
This has made me decidedly 'cool' toward these pandering perverters and their planetary prevaricators.
Statistics bombard us. I was wondering if, in the Land of Beancounters whether or not they raise beans anymore? They probably passed laws against it on the basis that more beans just 'confused' people. Sort of like G-8 countries don't manufacture anything but defense weapons and video games.http://www.theregister.co.uk/Design/graphics/icons/comment/troll_32.png
Captain Ahab Says
and Captain Ahab says that Whale Oil will continue it's dominance of the lighting industry....
Why Paula Abdul is a 'judge' . Fooling a judge is serious business and is usually only done by hardened career criminals. So where did Sacha do his time before this incident? He'll never make the Fashion Police this way.
Apple Slices Retail Staff
We'll maybe with all the redundant retail space it could actually sell apples and apple products. You know - pies, cobbler, dumplings - candy apples. It would mean having to retrain the staff to know what Brown Betty meant or a Macintosh other than an old doorstop of a computer. Just a thought.
- Does Apple's iOS make you physically SICK? Try swallowing version 7.1
- Fee fie Firefox: Mozilla's lawyers probe Dell over browser install charge
- Pics Indestructible Death Stars blow up planets with glowing KILL RAY
- Video Snowden: You can't trust SPOOKS with your DATA
- 166 days later: Space Station astronauts return to Earth