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* Posts by Sir Wiggum

875 posts • joined 3 Mar 2009

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Jaguar Sportbrake: The chicken tikka masala of van-sized posh cars

Sir Wiggum

I suspect that with the XE, they're learning lessons from the X-type, the naysayers complaining that it was too small.

And that it was Mondeo based (despite various Audis being VW/Skoda based and blatantly getting away with it)

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Sir Wiggum

Re: No alternative

Agree totally.

Citroen are running out the C5, and will probably not replace it, offering up the 3008 based DS5 instead.

Alfa may or may not be bringing out a large saloon and estate at some point, depending on the news.

Honda have basically replaced the unloved and underrated Accord with the Civic estate and some sort of 4x4.

Toyota may or may not be getting rid of the Avensis.

So, of the little alternatives, it leaves:

- Skoda Superb - VW parts bin, but all of those taxi drivers can't be wrong...

- Volvo V70 - The closest alternative to the 9-5 estate.

- Mazda 6 - I reckon this vaguely looks Jaguar-ish, from a company regarded by many as the Japanese Alfa...

- Hyundai i40 - If you can live with the badge.

- Mondeo / Insignia - The former is huge and available for buttons, getting replaced next year. The Insignia estate boot is slightly smaller.

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Sir Wiggum

Re: Nice Review

Big Citroen estates used to be the weapon of choice for those lumbering big boxes round my way.

The compliant suspension ensured that the boxes got there in one piece, the self levelling suspension meant that it never trailed the ground delivering several dozen PSU batteries, and it could be lowered or raised to prevent putting one's back out.

Sadly the mk1 C5 was an ugly duckling, briefly helped by the facelift, but the C5 and DS5 have went all Germanic in the suspension department.

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Here's your chance to buy an ancient, working APPLE ONE

Sir Wiggum

Ohhhhh Matrox!!!

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Sir Wiggum

Re: "So what can an original Mac do that the new ones can't?"

Was thinking that...

If it was a 128k Mac, or even a fat 512k (I once sold a Plus a few years ago for £300) then fair enough.

But the 1 is as different to the Mac as a a Raspberry Pi is to a Mac Pro.

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Renault Twingo: Small, sporty(ish), safe ... and it's a BACK-ENDER

Sir Wiggum

Re: Breathes from under the car, so...

This was why big Citroens used to be handy.

Yes, the BX also had a ridiculously low air intake, but until they axe the top spec C5 big Citroens traditionally allowed the driver to raise the suspension, making mincemeat of large puddles.

Mind I had a Celica with a very low radiator though, first stonechip it got and it was leaking like an iCloud.

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Pop-up ad man: SORRY we made such a 'hated tool', netizens

Sir Wiggum

Re: Karma remains balanced

C4 is one of the few channels that produces programming worth watching these days

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Watch: Kids slam Apple as 'BORING, the whole thing is BORING'

Sir Wiggum

Olden stuff

I keep a Mac Classic in the computer room (a room that itself an alien concept now with portable laptops and tablets) for old times sake.

I worry that should I reproduce, my offspring will not see the interest in the daft looking beige box in the corner. Mostly black and white and a tiny screen.

The II is interesting in that they managed to shoehorn a Mac Finder like UI into it, almost a decade before the Win95/Pentium era.

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Wolfenstein: The New Order ... BLAM-BLAM! That guard did Nazi that coming

Sir Wiggum

"Can I play, Daddy?"

The "Can I play, Daddy?" setting is actually a nod to Wolfenstein 3D.

Where is your gaming history?

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Waterfront flats plan for IBM's UK HQ as housing market goes bananas

Sir Wiggum

Belfast Office

I see they've moved out of the Belfast city centre office too, would fetch a few penny.

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LA air traffic meltdown: System simply 'RAN OUT OF MEMORY'

Sir Wiggum

Re: Submitting flight plan...

The day little Bobby Tables tries to book a flight....

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Quick Q: How many FLOPPIES do I need for 16 MILLION image files?

Sir Wiggum

Ah my old Zip disks.

Handy as I'd picked up an old Zip drive for the 486 and bought a 2nd hand Mac with an internal Zip drive.

Have the drive and a couple of disks in the house, should really try and find the power supply and see what I can grab off them onto a USB pen drive.

Amazing to think that on my keyring I have the equivalent of 80 Zip disks!!!!

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Windows XP market share decline stalls, Mac OS X surges

Sir Wiggum

Re: Are old XP machines being upgraded/replaced, or simply retired?

I used to upgrade 9x machines with Windows FLP, which was like a cutdown XP.

Did the job, and with the Royale skin looked modern!

Sadly, no such version has been made of 7. While a decent OS, from the performance (lack of) of 7 on a netbook, I'd not put 7 on anything but newish fast hardware.

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Ninten-DON'T: Wii U bomb blows Mario Kart giant off track – but new console promised

Sir Wiggum

Greasy palms

"I guess they are too honourable as a company to grease the palms of the reviewers."

One only needs to look at the motoring media, and some winners / victims of the motoring industry over the last few years to see how that ends up...

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PEAK APPLE: Mystery upstart to hurl iLord from its throne 'by 2020'

Sir Wiggum

don't have anything in the cloud and they are far too rooted in hardware

" don't have anything in the cloud

and they are far too rooted in hardware"

I suspect that the cloud fad will have passed, or at least be on the wane by 2020. These things are cyclical fashions, and just as the old mainframe - terminal model gave way to LAN'd PCs, so cloud will move on and the Next Big Thing will replace it.

The NSA snooping scandals, having no control over your own data and lack of trust with some cloud providers are already seeding the rainstorm.

And being rooted in hardware isn't a bad thing, despite what the likes of IBM think.

We're still going to need devices - computers, phones, tablets, whatever the next big thing is (wearable tech?).

Apple are at least in the envious position of using industrial design to position themselves at the top end of the market, charging whatever they want as they know it'll sell anyway.

It's a bit like saying:

"VW group are going to flop by 2020 as they don't have anything in private/toll road infrastructure and they are far too rooted in car manufacturing"

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Yaarrgh! LOOK OUT! UK set to be BURIED under MOUNTAIN of TABLETS

Sir Wiggum

Acer and HP

"an inventory strategy that served Acer well until demand for netbook and low-cost notebooks collapsed in late 2010."

Don't know about everyone else, but the reason I bought an Acer netbook was because it was on for 150 quid. Even the girl at the till couldn't believe it.

A useful little machine, still gets used occasionally!

The other device I picked up was an HP Touchpad, which ended up as a cracking tablet. In fact, some of the features, such as bluetooth calling to a mobile, aren't available on my Android tablet.

Was great until it ended up consuming a spilt glass of wine, it has never woken up since.

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Windows 8.1 Update: Throws desktop drones a bone but still as TOUCHY as ever

Sir Wiggum

Touch or no touch

People like long term transitions. Windows 95 still allowed the Program Manager to be ran, for example.

The Windows 8 default desktop with all the boxes just feels too much like a mix of MS Bob and Xbox 360 (where it was difficult to find things at the best of times!)

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The... Windows... XPocalypse... is... NIGH

Sir Wiggum

Re: Microsoft missed an opportunity here...

Rebrand it "Windows Fundamentals for Legacy PCs" and target it at older installations?

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Google hands over $1.4m for unmarked Street View cars in Italy

Sir Wiggum

Fairly recognisable

When I spotted one, it was fairly recognisable:

http://www.wgmnet.co.uk/opel3resize.jpg

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Windows XP market share GROWS AGAIN, outstrips Win 8.1 surge

Sir Wiggum

Re: That has got to be embarrassing for Microsoft

What they need is another FLP.

FLP was XP-lite for old Pentium 2s etc. that were running Win 9x to bring them up to the NT/XP line.

An FLP2 based on 8.x, with TIFKAM nonsense removed, but which runs on anything from a 1.5ghz atom up, would be useful in getting people off XP.

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Plusnet goes titsup for spectacular hour-long wobble

Sir Wiggum

Not sure if I'd notice

Not sure if I'd notice any reduction in speed that Plusnet provide, below the 1.5mb/s.

Might be fine in 1998, but in 2014 it is shockingly slow.

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Get Quake III running on Raspberry Pi using Broadcom's open-source GPU drivers, earn $10K

Sir Wiggum

Re: Incredible

I was going to post similar.

I remember in the mid/late 90s, a friend had a top of the range PC with a Voodoo 2 graphics card, staring in amazement at the anti-aliasing and the lighting effects (back then, every game had red and blue lights everywhere, it was atmospheric at the time).

Now it runs on a 20 quid 'toy'

In 20 years time, looking forward to playing Crysis and Bioshock on a RaspberryBake....

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Hey, IT department! Sick of vendor shaftings? Why not DO IT, yourself

Sir Wiggum

Re: Smart kids in the UK are making better career decisions too

This.

The careers teacher in the 90s sold me a pig in a poke.

I ran SimCity on their 386s, suddenly I was some sort of whizzkid.

Ended up with a BSc Comp Sci, was sold some sort of golden path, ended up in App. Support fixing other people's messes.

If I had to do it all over again - I wouldn't.

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But... you work in IT... Why aren't we RICH?

Sir Wiggum

First is to make up a childish name, like 'boo', 'twitter', 'bing', 'google' etc.

Then, get the trendies to use your site. Sell useless stuff at high prices, or have a service which will never turn a profit. Get the trendies talking about it, as if it is some 'in' secret.

Then, fire out PRs, wait until the investors buy you, sell out, retire to a mansion in the Bahamas before investors realise they've been sold a pig in a poke.

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Facebook ditches TOP SECRET email service. Did YOU know it had one?

Sir Wiggum

One provider, one service please

Call me old fashioned, but if one provider can focus on one service that'd be great.

Facebook - don't offer me email.

Google/Gmail - don't offer me social networking.

Sorted.

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Wii got it WRONG: How do you solve a problem like Nintendo?

Sir Wiggum

Re: Wii failed

The N64s visuals were remarkable compared to the PS1 and the Saturn.

Goldeneye was a watershed moment in console gaming history.

Super Mario 64 showed that you could take an old franchise, turn it 3D without losing the fun.

Pilotwings 64 was a thing of beauty that still gets the occasional play.

WaveRace was the showcase for water effects.

What the N64 didn't have was the breadth of games that the PS1's licensing allowed.

The cartridge format restricted the size of games, and were expensive to produce (and sell) compared to CDs.

The PS1 struck a cord with the 90s 'lads' era, gaming was no longer Manic Miner in the bedroom, it was Fifa and Gran Turismo in the living room.

The Gamecube similarly failed against the PS2 and Xbox, the Wii was basically Gamecube with a motion controller. Some fun games - WiiSports, Mario Kart Wii, but once the gimmick wore off it was back to the 360/PS3 for BioShock / GTA4-5 / Forza-GT / Cod-Battlefield / Fallout etc.

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Micro Men: The story of the syntax era

Sir Wiggum

How I envy the pioneering era of UK computing 30 years ago, as I sit in front of a Chinese computer running a mass produced American OS.

Amstrad swept up with their bulk sales to retailers, no masses of inventory, ended up buying the last of Sinclair.

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You’re NOT fired: The story of Amstrad’s amazing CPC 464

Sir Wiggum

Re: Mail Order

Did anyone actually do this?

Most I know bought their C64s / Spectrums / Amstrads from the likes of Comet / Lazer / Boots / Tandy...

I never tried an Amstrad, though I did boot up an emulator once to play an old game I was trying to source on any emulator. It booted up CPM, which with DOS-like syntax did feel very business-like.

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Boffin talks WATER on MARS: Granted, no 'smoking gun', but all clues flow there...

Sir Wiggum

Ice caps?

Surely the martian ice caps are the greatest indicator of water?

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Gamers in a flap as Vietnamese dev pulls Flappy Bird

Sir Wiggum

Bad publicity?

No such thing as bad publicity.

I'd never heard of this, and if I had noticed it on the app store I would've thought it was an Angry Birds ripoff.

Now from the national media, I know the app, what it is about and who the developer is.

Not bad publicity at all!

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STRIPPED DOWN and EXPOSED: Business kit from the good old days

Sir Wiggum

Goldmine

You're sitting on a goldmine there.

- The eMac will sell itself on eBay to one of the many Apple hoarders.

- The typewriter - at a wedding show recently we were quoted 50 quid to hire a typewriter, like the one there with a bit of plastic ivy glued to it. The 'retro' wedding craze is in full swing and is an absolute cashcow to those in the know.

- The filing cabinets - used car dealers love these for storing V5s, MOTs, dodgy stamped service history books etc. - can't do that with a computer!

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Sony set to axe 5,000 workers worldwide as it flings PC biz overboard

Sir Wiggum

Re: TV and DLNA

"Volkswagen, BMW, Mercedes (not Opel for obvious reasons, GM) - Germans put a lot of effort into making the car look esthetic"

Seriously? "esthetic"?

VW just tweak the headlights of their last generation Golf and sell it as a new model.

BMW and Mercedes have a photocopier set to S/M/L saloon car.

German designs are some of the most conservative (small c) and boring in the industry.

Compare a last-gen 3 series coupe and saloon to an Alfa Romeo Brera and 159.

Compare an S class to a Jag XJ.

VW, BMW, Mercedes etc. aesthetic-wise are the automotive equivalent of Thinkpads.

Boring unchanging design, usually bought as corporate fleets.

Ford, Vauxhall etc. are the automotive equivalent of Dells.

I do agree, though, that someone needs to step up to the plate and offer an alternative to the cheap-plastic x86 laptops. Though most are probably keeping their best designs for tablets and ultra-expensive 'ultrabooks'.

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Sir Wiggum

Re: Their market

Avoid Lenovo era Thinkpads.

While my IBM TP 380Z still trundles along for occasional retro gaming, my Lenovo TP 410 needed 3 (!) replacements after the fan stopped spinning. Eventually it was crashing a lot (IRQ not less than or equal?) then ground to a halt (HD in death throes).

I would not recommend a Lenovo Thinkpad to anybody.

I did have a VAOIAOAIO about 12 years ago, nice machine at the time. Was great until the fan stopped spinning (although consuming half a bottle of beer might've played a factor in it's demise).

For some reason the model I had had a different shaped CPU fan to other, presumably more popular models, I never did find a replacement. Ended up breaking, salvaged the HDD and sold the screen and casing for parts.

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Life support's ABOUT to be switched off, but XP's suddenly COOL again

Sir Wiggum

Only machine I can think of, my old Netbook runs Linux, XP and OSX.

Plenty of alternative there.

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This THREESOME is a HANDFUL: It’s the Asus Transformer Book Trio

Sir Wiggum

Owning an Android Transformer and occasionally using an old Acer Aspire One netbook, this looks like it could be an ideal living room machine.

Connect to TV when needed, the tablet is still usable.

Use as laptop when needed.

My only concern is that the 'switch' looks bolted on, it reminds me a bit of an Amstrad MegaPC which was a 386 PC with a Megadrive bolted on, rather than sharing.

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MAC TO THE FUTURE: 30 years of hindsight and smart-arsery

Sir Wiggum

Re: Locked into enforced throw-away

Mac Mini?

Mac Pro?

Even during the compact run, various PC-like boxes were made, 2s LC 'pizza' boxes, up to the beige G3 which were basically an iMac sans the form factor, colour and USB.

The G3/4 towers were iMac coloured but a proper tower, then the 'cube'...

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Windows 8.1 update 'screenshots' leak: Metro apps popped into classic desktop taskbar

Sir Wiggum

Re: desktop on every phone

I remember Windows Mobile phones from a decade ago, at least they had a stylus for touching the mini-CE start menu.

Difficult to get that point of accuracy with a big chubby finger. (oo-er!)

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Bloke hews plywood Raspberry Pi tablet

Sir Wiggum

Re: We did question his use of plywood

The Spruce Goose!!

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Rap for KitKat in crap app wrap trap flap: Android 4.4 is 'meant to work like that'

Sir Wiggum

The problem with Opera

The problem I've found with Opera is with sites that are updated a lot.

Say, the mobile twitter site.

You go to click a link, but for some reason it gets the page layout of the latest page and clicks *that* region, rather than the original link.

Annoying, as it means you have to go back, refresh, find the link and select it again.

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Twitter: It's JUST LIKE Elder Scrolls (no it's not)

Sir Wiggum

Life is indeed a game.

Albeit one that is heavily skewed towards those who have amassed, or started the game with, large amounts of in-game credits.

A game server or two need rebooted somewhere.

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Intel and Asus put the dual boot in, offer 2-in-1 lapslab WinDroid

Sir Wiggum

Re: Decent Android Laptop

Closest is probably the Asus Transformer

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Intel ditches McAfee brand: 'THANK GOD' shouts McAfee the man

Sir Wiggum

Nonetheless, a good way of getting a company to stop putting your name on a terrible product.

I'll bet Peter Norton is wishing he was videod snorting sherbet off a strippers chest.

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Ten classic electronic calculators from the 1970s and 1980s

Sir Wiggum

Casio FX-82

Joining secondary school in the mid 90s I remember one of the requirements was a Casio FX-82.

It looked like it had barely changed in 15 years, but if it did the job then it was ripe for the job.

I also remember in the 80s in primary school, someone had a calculator that had a vivid red LED display, it was a thing of beauty.

Remember teachers saying that mental arithmetic was important?

That we wouldn't be carrying calculators with us everyday?

I look at my mobile phone, with calculator, spreadsheet and internet connectivity functionality, and laugh to myself.

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Gran Turismo 6: Another glossy, gorgeous Mario Kart on steroids

Sir Wiggum

For me, the pinnacle of racing sims was Toca2. I really enjoyed it, the AI seemed believable, and it was great to get a balance between proper racing, not being left behind but not zooming off into the distance either.

Later Codemasters offerings have been more about drifting around some X-Games stadium rather than raking a Peugeot saloon car around Knockhill and Croft.

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Sir Wiggum

Re: waltz-win in first car: a Honda (yes, really)

I once had an old Accord coupe VTec auto that cruised about like an old Merc, but when you put the foot down it is one of the only cars I've ever owned that was proper push-to-the-back-of-the-seat, it saw off many challenges from unaware boy racers in lesser Corsas.

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Sega’s Out Run: Even better than the wheel thing

Sir Wiggum

Re: Home versions

My C64 copy was the 2nd on a compilation, meaning I had to load through the first game, then the 2nd (I was too young to realise the use of the tape counter).

I enjoyed it.

I remember Sega Power Drift, which was a bit like Out Run but had more of a roller coaster type tracks

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Ghosts of Christmas Past: Ten tech treats from yesteryear

Sir Wiggum

Re: Handspring Visor Deluxe

> but this whole iMac design was one of the worst things to face the face of earth

Late 90s and everything was translucently blue, from external TV cards, webcams, printers, even pencil sharpeners.

By the early to mid 2000s, it was iPod white. Even the original xBox 360.

Then, late 2000s and into the 2010s, with the iPhone and iPad, black was the new.. black.

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Blighty's winter storms are PUNY compared to Saturn's 200mph, 15,000 mile wide HEXACANE

Sir Wiggum

A hex upon thee

Plenty of hex screws lying about the Antrim coast.

Just follow the signs for the Giants Causeway.

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RM to schools: You can have third-party kit, just not from us

Sir Wiggum

End of an era

Whatever your opinion of RM, it is the end of an era.

Throughout the 80s and into the 90s, RM was there in my schooldays, my first experiences of x86 PCs.

RM Nimbuses, the old 8086s then the 386s which were BNC networked to boot off a server.

The occasional standalone machine with Clarisworks installed.

They're as much a part of my childhood as Mac Classics.

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Sony brags: We've hit over 2 MEELLION PS4 console 'sales' worldwide

Sir Wiggum

Re: Consoles are to games

A friend recently bought a PS4. I asked him what the main USPs were, he said the menus were a bit faster.

Given that when I switch the PS3 or 360 on, the menus are usually the bit in between me booting and playing the game, I don't see them for more than a handful of seconds anyway. It wouldn't make me rush out and buy one.

However - Show me Fallout 4 with gorgeous textures at 1080i and I'll be first in the queue....

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