* Posts by Chris King

168 posts • joined 13 Feb 2009

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HP slaps dress code on R&D geeks: Bin that T-shirt, put on this tie

Chris King

It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me...

...and that's why I'm sat in a disciplinary hearing dressed as Batman.

(Hey, it's better than the usual "Dress for the job you WANT, not the one you HAVE" line)

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Universal Pictures finds pirated Jurassic World on own localhost, fires off a DMCA takedown

Chris King

Re: A Scanner Darkly

I've had to deal with notices for IP addresses that don't belong to us, and one in a 10-net that wasn't even in use on our local network at the time.

They got told to stop making stuff up in the first case, and to read RFC1918A in the second.

I usually find that when a notice comes in for newly-pirated material, the machine is most likely compromised (and being used as a warez depot) but older films/music/games are more likely to have been downloaded by the user. Getting take-downs for ten-year-old movies really gets tiring after a while.

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Norton for Windows 10 is NOT a box-borking beta, insists Symantec

Chris King

Stick 'em on the compost heap with McAfee...

You know a "security" product is bad when the uninstaller is the best part of the software.

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Apple's chip'n'firmware security demands behind HomeKit delays

Chris King

Why worry ?

The crims will have helped themselves to everything long before the federales turn up.

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Spaniard sues eBay over right to sell the Sun

Chris King

Yeah, right...

1. How is she going to manage "Buyer collection only" ?

2. She can't sell it by PayPal, because she won't be able to deliver it by a tracked service - the buyer will be able to make a "Where's my celestial body ?" claim and she will automatically lose.

3. Wrapping it might be a problem.

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HMRC ditches Microsoft for Google, sends data offshore

Chris King

Re: HMRC ditches Microsoft for Google, sends data to NSA

You're also forgetting that they didn't put a stamp on it...

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Beware Red Hat interviews: You'll pay for coffee, lunch and fuel

Chris King

Re: Strange rationalisation

Job interviews are as much about an employer selling themselves to you, as they are about you selling yourself to a potential employer.

If the execs start cheaping out like that before you've even joined the company, what are they going to be like once you've joined ?

I've been ripped off by companies who offered to pay interview expenses, then changed their mind. One of them made the mistake of contacting me on LinkedIn the other week - "Not a chance, I'm not travelling halfway across the country for you to waste my time and rip me off again !"

That bridge wasn't so much burned, more nuked from orbit.

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El Reg knocks a fiver off 16GB USB stick

Chris King

Small and skinny doesn't suit me...

If you're a USB stick, I'm Death Incarnate.

I've trodden on several, dropped a few into puddles, smashed one closing a car door on it, and even had one driven over by a bendy bus. I also seem to be able to conjure up wormholes into which nano sticks can fall, only to reappear somewhere completely unexpected a few months later.

I used to have an IronKey, but I wanted a lot more capacity without having to re-mortgage my soul. My main USB stick is now a Corsair Flash Survivor Stealth 64Gb - big enough that it's very difficult to lose, waterproof and bloody difficult to kill inside its metal shell. Being USB 3.0, it's also very quick.

Yours for £47.99 from Amazon, and they now do capacities up to 256Gb.

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What to do when the users are watching Nazi dwarf smut at work?

Chris King

Sometimes, you don't even have to hit the right target...

In a previous job, I was asked to investigate a problem with internet speed (Megastream 2 for a campus site - 'nuff said), and I discovered that someone had been viewing lots and lots of porn vids at the time the problem occurred.

So, I passed the information on to the offender's department. To my surprise, TWO people 'fessed up - it seems that two machines had been swapped behind my back, and my records weren't up to date.

#1 offending IP now belonged to another staff PC, and "words were had" - but the person I had accused turned out to be #3 on the bandwidth report, and he realised that the jig was up.

I didn't believe on bringing disciplinary action down upon people for stuff like that - departmental secretaries giving academics the "I know what YOU did in the comfort of your office last night" Laser Stare of Doom was far more effective, and meant less paperwork for me.

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Chris King

Re: How things have moved on

You get screen protectors for your phones ? Luxury !

(Scratch that - you get a work-supplied phone ? Luxury !)

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SOD TABLETS, if you want to get anything done travelling get a ... yes, a LAPTOP

Chris King

Re: The art of travel....

One solution to the wash-bag being too big or not folding up - bonsai toiletries !

http://www.gotiny.co.uk/

No point in carrying a full-size bar of soap for a two-day trip, when you can pack a couple of tiny ones. Many of their lines are similar size to what you'll find in hotel bathrooms, but brands you'll actually recognise - expensive compared to the full-size products in the shops, but you're paying for the convenience.

Having just taken one on a three-day trip, I can also vouch for the Asus Zenbook UX305 being able to charge up other kit quickly - I only had to take the charger for the Zenbook itself, and a Micro USB cable. No problem keeping camera, phone and Bluetooth headset topped up !

(I just hope this isn't going to lead to a series of Reg articles on "hypermilling" carry-on luggage !)

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Chris King

Re: Uploading 'everything' to iCloud?

Does it matter, so long as YOU can run faster than them ?

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Is Grant Shapps being naughty on Wikipedia – or did a Lib Dem stitch him up?

Chris King

Re: Just another minus grade

"At this moment in time I really can't see any point in bothering to vote at all. I'm almost convinced my time would be better spent sat in the garden watching the grass grow."

I haven't become quite that cynical yet, but I know I'm going to have a difficult time deciding where to place my "X".

It's no longer a case of "Which candidate will serve me best ?" - it hasn't been that way for a long time.

Now, it's more a case of "Which candidate will cause me the least damage ?"

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Chris King

“It’s the wisdom of the crowd that gives you the best results in the long-term"

Rory Cellan-Jones has obviously never encountered:

(a) Riots ;

(b) Political party conferences ;

(c) Chimpanzees flinging dung to make intruders run away.

The edit-wars I've encountered on Wikipedia mostly resemble (c).

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Sysadmins, patch now: HTTP 'pings of death' are spewing across web to kill Windows servers

Chris King

I'm in my happy place... I'm in my happy place...

REBOOT !!! HAHAHAH !!!

http://ars.userfriendly.org/cartoons/?id=19980914

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Selfie sticks BANNED by Apple: No hipster tools' tools allowed at WWDC

Chris King

Re: Why have age limits at all?

That'll be COPPA:

http://www.coppa.org/comply.htm

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Chris King

Re: Can someone sum up the article for me...

You know, that "ecosystem" could include the scum and algae floating on the top...

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PIRATES and THIEVES to get Windows 10 as BOOTY

Chris King
Joke

I once had an e-mail from a 419'er, telling me that I had won the "Microsoft Word Lottery". I was tempted to write back, asking if first prize was a copy of Office, and second prize was two copies !

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RIP Sir Terry Pratchett: Discworld author finally gets to meet DEATH

Chris King

Re: We are all a little poorer today

Or Arnold Rimmer, for that matter - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ifaw07fuU00

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Chris King
Unhappy

Re: Oookk. OOK.

SQUEAK? (twich whiskers)

YES, I'M AFRAID SO.

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FREAK show: Apple and Android SSL WIDE OPEN to snoopers

Chris King

Re: Stuck on old Android

Five years is "obsolete" in Apple terms, but interestingly no iPhones apart from the original model are currently listed at https://support.apple.com/en-us/ht1752 - it's possible the 3gs might get an update, but I wouldn't bank on it.

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Chris King

Re: A Question

Can criminals steal $100 from you in another crime to finance this one ?

Cost is not a deterrent to someone who can steal or con their way to affording something.

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How good a techie are you? Objective about yourself and your skills?

Chris King

Just sign the damn papers already !

I'm going to be brutal about this - if you don't sign those papers, I don't want you writing a whiny article lamenting that fact in five years time !

Competence IS in the eye of the beholder, but how can the beholder know you're competent unless you've proved it in some way ? Joining a professional body will help, but you have experience, which is also important.

Sign up, and see how you square up. The worst that will happen is they'll tell you what you need to do to progress.

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Hello Barbie: Hang on, this Wi-Fi doll records your child's voice?

Chris King

Re: Soooo wrong

I was also thinking along the lines of "Product Placement Barbie"....

"Barbie needs a new dress !!!"

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Chris King

Obligatory Harry Harrison reference...

"I Always Do What Teddy Says"

http://opalcp12.wikispaces.com/file/view/I+Always+Do+What+Teddy+Says.pdf

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GRUNTY CHIMPS 'blend in among locals' after moving to Scotland

Chris King
Pint

Or maybe it's...

Six pints o'heavy, landlord !

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'Boutique' ISPs: Snub the Big 4 AND get great service

Chris King

Re: Jammy git

I'm the reverse - some ISP's go up like a Bond Baddie's hide-out after I've been with them for a while !

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Chris King

Re: I've seen these kind of ISPs before.

"Several down votes - these will be the people who STILL believe that £1.99 a month can get you fast, unlimited broadband."

Or maybe they down-voted Jason 7 because he missed the point. The ISP's in the article have all been around for a while, and certainly more than "six months".

Zen started in 1996, AAISP in 1997, Xilo in 2007, ICUK and Merula have been around for a while too.

There are plenty of cheap ISP's that have started well and gone to crap in a matter of months, and there are plenty of "Elder God" ISP's out there that have turned into rebranded services (Demon, Pipex, Nildram ?) or seem to have gone nowhere (ClaraNet ?). None of the ISP's in this article belong in either of those categories.

I've been with AAISP for nearly ten years, and the service has been consistently good. I hear lots of good things from folks on Zen and Xilo too.

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UK official LOSES Mark Duggan shooting discs IN THE POST

Chris King

UKgov response...

"Backups - we've heard of them"

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'Revenge porn' bully told not to post people's nude pics online. That's it. That's his punishment

Chris King

If they ever do a live-action version of the Simpsons...

it seems we've already found ourselves the Comic Book Guy !

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Chris King

Triple Bag ?

Somebody described me this way once (I prefer "I have a face for radio and a voice for mime") and it sounds all too appropriate...

One bag for his head...

One bag for her head in case his falls off...

And one for the light in case of a double failure.

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Wham, bam... premium rate scam: Grindr users hit with fun-killing charges

Chris King

Re: £1 per second? I don't think so.

Yep, total bollocks on that "pound per second" thing. PhonePayPlus says:

Check a Number - Result

PhonepayPlus has the following information about number:

09136660010

Customer care number: 0203 455 0849

Customer care email: [email protected]

Search result provided by: Technology and communication Limited

Service connected on: 01 December 2014

Service terminated on: This service is still operating

Name of service: Recorded Football Stars

Type of service: Entertainment - non-adult

Service description: A listening more funny sentences of European footballers.

How much does this service cost? £1.53 per call & £1.53 per minute

If you would like to find out more about this service or have a question about it then you should contact Technology and communication Limited

Unit H, 12/F, Legend Tower

7 Shing Yip Street

Kwun Tong

Kowloon

123

You can bet that the contact details are fake and the London number is a VoIP line, so how was this obviously fake overseas company allowed to operate a premium rate number ?

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ASUS router-popping exploit on the loose

Chris King

...and it's fixed in ASUS-WRT too !

From the ASUS web site:

ASUS RT-N66U Firmware version 3.0.0.4.376.3754

-Fixed infosvr security issue.

-Fixed Cross-site request forgery security issue

Confirmed for RT-N66U and RT-AC66U.

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Chris King

Re: Well that is curious

Where Merlin goes, Asus follows - he contributes a lot of enhancements and bugfixes back to Asus.

Powernumpty's post refers to the AsusWRT-Merlin Changelog, lo and behold:

376.49_5 (9-Jan-2015)

- FIXED: Vulnerability in infosvr (CVE-2014-9583) (Asus bug)

- FIXED: Additional security issue in infosvr (incorrect memcpy()

call) (Asus bug)

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Frontier wipes credit of Elite: Dangerous 'billionaire' badboys

Chris King

Re: Mostly Penniless.

The PC version also had random jump failures that would strand you in the middle of nowhere, and they happened far too often for my liking.

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Chris King

Re: Mostly Penniless.

There was a competition for players who reached Elite status, but all the Spectrum owners were disqualified because of that bug. I remember getting a letter of apology from Firebird, along with a couple of badges.

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UKIP website TAKES A KIP, but for why?

Chris King
Coat

Re: They arent a serious party..

Yes, damn those homophones and their same-sounding words with differing meanings, taking over our dictionaries and our thesauruses, they're not as bad as the Synonyms but at least *they* make a decent curry !

(Coat, before Lenny Henry accuses me of ripping off "Go home Cone")

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No, I won't SNORKEL in your server room at STUPID-O'CLOCK

Chris King
Facepalm

Re: Mist the old days

I bet there will be plenty of "botched aircon" stories in this thread, so here's another one...

Early on in my career, I worked for a company that took over a building and needed to keep a bunch of MicroVAXen cool.

Solution: Stick 'em in a broom cupboard and use a bathroom extractor fan with a thermostat to draw in air from the corridor.

Problem is, they wired up the thermostat so that it ran until a certain temperature was reached.

The MicroVAXen got nice and toasty, THEN the fan cut out - so they got even more toasty pretty quickly.

Oh, did I mention this was an ELECTRONICS company ?

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Chris King

One of our LAN rooms suffered flooding from an aircon leak, which shorted out a rack UPS - so it was flooded and on fire at the same time.

My boss asked how this was possible, to which someone said "Well, we usually have the fire on top and the flooding below".

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Doctor Who's tangerine dream and Clara's death wish in Last Christmas

Chris King

Re: its fiction

Where they crying because they were sad for Danny, or just confused ?

I mean, they turned him into "OEM Iron Man" (no badges or paint job). blew him up and made him give up his last chance for survival. But oh no, this is Dr Who and we'll pull random acts of necromancy out of the hat for dead characters, just not for the ones everybody wants to bring back,

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Chris King
Pint

Re: No. It. Wasn't.

"Love and Monsters" - an episode so bad, the shooting location for the final scene with Peter Kay was smashed flat and turned into an open-air car park. 'nuff said.

Think I'm kidding ? Here's the scene...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZWGeidvrJw

...and this is what it looks like now:

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/place/Pellett+St,+Cardiff+CF24+2FN/@51.478469,-3.1703432,3a,52.5y,111.35h,80.94t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1s1CPhZKtGXvDUqpBxswFMGQ!2e0!4m2!3m1!1s0x486e1cb611f5c3cd:0x18daefaa94113a20!6m1!1e1

(Beer icon, because this was also where The Vulcan pub used to stand)

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Google swears no search leg up for new dot-word sites: We drill into claims

Chris King

Re: SEO: Emperor's clothes

Also, keep the *content* fresh and up-to-date, that makes you more relevant to search engines.

The other advice I give to people wanting to put up a website is "Pick ONE domain AND STICK TO IT". Buying up the same name in different TLD's doesn't protect you against domain squatting, and having the same content on different domains can actually hurt your search ranking.

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MP caught playing Candy Crush at committee meeting: I'll ‘try’ not to do it again

Chris King

"I'll ‘try’ not to do it again"

If the constituents of Amber Valley have any sense, they'll make sure of that in May !

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VCs say Uber is worth $41bn... but don't worry, we're not in a bubble

Chris King

Re: It probably IS worth $41B

Only if they're Zimbabwean Dollars ? Hmm, at current exchange rates, that's still a bit on the high side.

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Norks: We might be aggressive but we didn't hack Sony!

Chris King

"Then again, norks with the skills to hack Sony sounds like an XKCD nightmare"

Lucky guesses, more like !

http://www.scmagazineuk.com/weak-passwords-revealed-by-sony-pictures-hackers/article/386610/

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Blackpool hotel 'fines' couple £100 for crap TripAdvisor review

Chris King

Re: This one's my favourite

Beautiful ! Just beautiful !

It's nice to see someone stand up to the dolts who whine "I'll write you a bad review !" like it's an automatic entitlement to freebies and compensation.

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YOU are the threat: True confessions of real-life sysadmins

Chris King

Exit Procedures and the "V'Ger Rule"

I've ended up writing "Exit Procedures" for previous employers just because they didn't consider this.. and invariably used myself as the first example.

No matter what the reason for my departure **, I like to make sure that my now ex-employer can't claim I left back-doors into systems. and that everything will continue to run without the presence of my user account. If I'm gone, I'm TOTALLY gone, end of story.

(** I've never been sacked from an IT gig, only from a summer job as a waiter. One of my "mates" phoned up the restaurant and posed as an angry customer who claimed that I'd told him to f**k off)

As I said on the Internet Storm Center a few years back...

When I design or build a system, I make absolutely sure that it's designed to what I call the "V'Ger Rule". If you've seen "Star Trek: The Motion Picture", you'll understand.

Put simply, the "V'Ger Rule" states:

"A System must continue to operate in a correct and safe manner in the absence of its Creator".

Or, put another way:

1. No blowing up any spaceships ;

2. No joyriding in Carbon Units ;

3. Fat, balding starship captains are to be shot on sight, especially ones that follow the "If you can't eat it, drink it, steal it, spend it or have sex with it, blow it up" mantra.

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Does Father Christmas expect a happy ending with Clara in Doctor Who?

Chris King

If I was Santa, I wouldn't be so subtle...

"Lying toads, both of you ! You're getting coal again this year !"

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Microsoft: How to run Internet Explorer 11 on ANDROID, iOS, OS X

Chris King

People still test ? Looking at some of the web crash-fests out there, you could have fooled me.

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Reg hacks see the woods or the trees In the Forest of the Night

Chris King

Is The Moff going all religious on us ?

A thought just occurred to me - not that this happens very often, so bear with me...

Clara's wildly changing behaviour - have we got some sort of "Seven Deadly Sins" thing going on here, to go with the "Promised Land" story arc ?

Lust - "PE". 'nuff said (that, and Strax seeing "lots of young men doing sport" during the brain scan in "Deep Breath". At least he thought it was sport...)

;

Gluttony - eating a Chinese meal on the TARDIS then realising she's about to go out for another one ("Time Heist")

Greed - wanting her cake and eating it. Running off with the Doctor, but stringing Danny along

Sloth - leaving the kids exercise books in the TARDIS, probably in the hope the Doctor would file them away and lose them forever

Wrath - "I'll slap you so hard, you'll regenerate !"

Pride - well, she's been smug for most of her existence on the show !

I haven't worked out anything for Envy yet, but there's probably a reference in there somewhere...

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