* Posts by Evil Auditor

1486 posts • joined 13 Jan 2009

Did a SUPER RARE Sony-Nintendo PlayStation prototype just pop up online? Possibly, maybe

Evil Auditor
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Re: Somebody's going to be rich...

Could you please be a bit more specific who the someone is, who is going to pay big bucks? I have quite some electronic junk too, which I'd like to get rid of....

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SEX-starved worm can GIVE HEAD to ITSELF to reproduce

Evil Auditor
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literature review

That's about where a scientific study should start. Internet made that task an awful lot easier. Not everything is available online though, but some "scientists" simply ignore what's not been published on the webs.

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Evil Auditor
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Also homo sapiens

Just check out people who are kept in long-term solitary confinement. Totally fucked in their head. They don't reproduce though. But probably would if they could...

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Ford recalls 433,000 cars: Software bug breaks engine off-switch

Evil Auditor
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A lot of cars, American or not, suck. That leaves you to choose from cars with supercharged engines or electric ones. But frankly, a lot of them suck, too. Get a bicycle!

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Evil Auditor
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Software error?

Possessed by evil spirits! Or how many lines of code did a Plymouth Fury from the 50s have?

Then again, there's probably not such a clear cut between possession and software errors...

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Evil Auditor
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Re: Bah!

You're right, of course. But in those days cars used to be stolen.

What, they still are you say? Bugger.

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FBI updates Most Wanted cyber felons list, offers US$4.2m bounties

Evil Auditor
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Re: depends on your employer

Depends entirely on which government(s) they work for...

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Rise of the Machines: ROBOT KILLS MAN at Volkswagen plant

Evil Auditor
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Besides which I find using the term "robot" to describe these PLC driven actuators stretching the term

Maybe I'm getting old and the meaning of this term changed recently. As far as I'm concerned, "robot" doesn't imply any intelligence at all but in fact can simply be some PLC driven actuators.

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Evil Auditor
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And "I'd of" wasn't against any rule you've been taught?

Starting to lose my will to live...

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Evil Auditor
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So don't start with the Skynet, okay?

Yes, yes. But how did the robot lure the man to go in there? Assuming that VW's industrial robots don't exactly look like Alicia Vikander.

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‘Clandestines' prompt British border blockade in France

Evil Auditor
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Finally, someone thought of the refugees. Oh...

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UH OH: Windows 10 will share your Wi-Fi key with your friends' friends

Evil Auditor
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Re: Kill that WiFi Sense thing!

Maybe you are right about the project manager. It shouldn't have been the pm to set the requirements though. But to whoever came up with that brilliant idea: fuck off and die - and not in that order.

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Evil Auditor
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Re: Off

do people really just run with the settings that come out of the box?

Not people who read El Reg. Let's say they are on the nerd side of users. But for most other people -and that is most users-, they just want to buy a device and start doing whatever they want to do. Can't blame them.

Yes, once their shit goes airborne they turn to us, again.

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Robo-car wars: Delphi's near crash, prang, wallop with Google DENIED!

Evil Auditor
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Both automated vehicles did exactly what they were supposed to do.

The Audi was tailgating?

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BOFH: Don't go changing on Friday evenings, I don't wanna work that hard

Evil Auditor
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Re: All of our updates are on a Friday

Reminds me of some fuckers at a place (a large, global bank) I used to work in a former life. Staff used to be paid additionally and well for work during their on-call duty. Some of those would deliberately implement some small fuck-up, e.g. in a batch run, that would go off during their on-call. They would have safed the IT bank once again, they would be paid well, and they probably hated their partners.

Once found out the incentives were changed to something more normal: paid for on-call duty but not for actual work during this time.

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Microsoft releases free Office apps for half of all Android phones

Evil Auditor
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Re: Alternative?

Trolling? Yes, a bit.

Seriously though, I've been using both iOS and Android phones for years. In my opinion, iOS sucks(*). I don't like it. But Android, which I prefer for its functionality, sucks even more.

(*)Although I believe for the usual user it is quite good and probably better (less troubles) than Androids.

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Evil Auditor
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Alternative?

Just wondering, is there a usable Linux mobile out there?

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Bloke called Rod struck by lightning for second time

Evil Auditor
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re how many are called Rod

That doesn't help much with the maths because maybe Rods are much more at risk being hit by lightning than other people. But it makes you wonder what roughly 41'000 Americans were thinking when naming their child.

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FLICK my FLINT and SNIFF my TREE on the streets of Naples

Evil Auditor
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Re: Maybe ....

@tfewster

As a non-smoker, I find the smell of those little tree fresheners far more offensive than cigarette smoke. No joke.

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The world .sucks at a minute past midnight on Sunday

Evil Auditor
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Thumb Up

JDX, I should create additional accounts here, just to multi-up-vote your comment. It's the only domain that really should exist under this TLD.

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BOOM! Stephen Elop shuffled out of Microsoft door

Evil Auditor
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Devil

Re: Indeed.

@John Brown

Be you a proper techie or not (neither am I in this regard). What worries me though is that you consider pizza a living being. Then again, if you leave the pizza lying around for long enough it probably turns into some sort of life-form...

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Evil Auditor
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Joke

Re: Indeed.

...love [...] I reserve that for living beings

What the heck are you doing on El Reg? You aren't a techie, are you?

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Hey kids, who wants to pwn a million BIOSes?

Evil Auditor
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Re: O RLY?

DropBear, I couldn't agree more. My hair stood on end when I read this crap. What they say sounds like what a junior trainee IT muppet would say - and like a recipe for failure.

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Swordfish fatally stabs man after man stabs, fatally, swordfish

Evil Auditor
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"He was such a tough guy that everyone's scared of him"

Not the swordfish though, no it wasn't.

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Evil Auditor
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Re subtitle

Yes, but with Hemingway is was clear who said it...

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What sort of tit builds non-bird bird boxes? Vodafone

Evil Auditor
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Joke

Just go for homing pigeons. Latency sucks but it offers excellent throughput.

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Naked cyclists take a hard line on 'aroused' protest participant

Evil Auditor
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Devil

@Ralph B

Are you Eadon's cousin?

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Evil Auditor
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Re sexist

I intervened on that matter already and Canterbury plods confirmed to deploy a special nipples watching unit next year. Vacancies will be posted soon, check here: Jobs

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What does it take to find the Antikythera Mechanism? Underwater robots, of course!

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: Do you really think

@theodore

Then, Apple surely would have a patent on AM.

Btw, it doesn't have round corners, does it?

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Hardcore creationist finds 60-million-year-old fossils in backyard ... 'No, it hasn’t changed my mind about the Bible'

Evil Auditor
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"We all have the same evidence, and it's just a matter of how you ignore it."

Here, Nernberg, fixed that for you.

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High-flying LOHAN fan raises ale-filled tankard

Evil Auditor
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Devil

Re: Call me a cyncic but....

Infidellic_, are you another one of Generation Y with the attention span of a gold fish?

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The 'echo chamber' effect misleading people on climate change

Evil Auditor
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Basically, people prefer opinions that support their own, already existing opinions? That's kind of new. And I'm really surprised that this also holds true in the area of climate change. Not.

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City of birth? Why password questions are a terrible idea

Evil Auditor
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Devil

@a_yank_lurker, and the answer is "2 inches".

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Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: Even worse

@king of foo, I'm sure your Durchfall has some colour and I don't want to hear any more details about that. But I'd tell you the same as recently told the missus: apricot is a fruit and not a feckin' colour!

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Evil Auditor
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Joke

Re: What is the name of your pet rabbit?

But why the heck would someone name a cat "in 1954"?

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LOHAN's final test flight set to honour PRATCHETT

Evil Auditor
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Happy

Re: Boring

Admit it, you are only here to collect down votes.

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Milking cow shot dead by police 'while trying to escape'

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: Gawd/ess.

And I thought us Yanks were gun-happy.

Not exclusively. There are many gun-happy people all over the world. The difference is, in the UK they have to grab the chance when there's a "rampant" cow around - they can't just shoot people.

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You say you want a musical revolution. Actually, have three

Evil Auditor
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Re: Rap on!

TU for bringing back some memories....

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Singapore's prime minister releases source code for his hand-coded Sudoku-solver

Evil Auditor
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Lee, that's great! If you ever get bored of programming, I'd recommend starting with "Democracy for Dummies".

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HP wag has last laugh at US prez wannabe with carlyfiorina.org snatch

Evil Auditor
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At least, Carly's not afraid of taking unpopular decisions.

But I really liked the part where she said that what she did to HP, she can do with the USA. Fuck it all over, minding her own pocket?

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Boffins' ball barrage bombardment biffs bumbling bimble biped-bot

Evil Auditor
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Devil

ROTM!

Don't make it angry! Around 0:52 you can clearly see that the machine starts a counter attack on the meatsack.

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SEX: Naughty female stegosauruses offered it on a PLATE

Evil Auditor
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Re: Some questions still remain

Wouldn't that require that they be more of an egg sac than hard shelled egg?

Good point! Do we know that they had hard shelled eggs? But I guess that also depends on the kind of sperm cells - what do we know about them? I mean, these were dinosaurs' sperm cells!

Bearing in mind that dinosaurs are largely extinct, their way of reproduction may not have been the most successful...

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Evil Auditor
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Happy

Re: Every schoolboy's favourite dino?

and I still haven't grown up according to my missus

She didn't expect you to grow up, did she?!

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Evil Auditor
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Re: Some questions still remain

On a more serious note, why do we suggest that they even had intercourse - maybe the females laid their unfertilised eggs in a cosy place and the males sprayed over it? Then again, this might have involved a bit too much thinking. Unless, like today's dogs, they "marked" about everywhere...

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Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: Some questions still remain

So, any suggestions as to what went on?

Yep! They'd never existed, hence never bred. God arranged those fossils 6'000 years ago. Full stop.

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Fed-up Colorado man takes 9mm PISTOL to vexing Dell PC

Evil Auditor
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Well, back yonks, in another life, I had to deal with Olivetti PCs. Those buggers were a real pain! You couldn't open a case without having your hands and fingers cut. How I wished to shoot them...

When switching to Dell, that was a real treat.

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Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: I think that may invalidate his warranty...

If it was an HP the bullets would have $99 each - although the gun would only have cost $39.99

It was a Hi-Point; costs hardly more than $39.99.

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White House cyber-general says US must be able to cyber-nuke the worst of the cyber-worst

Evil Auditor
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Another point of view

The White House wants its own cyber-terrorist group.

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Google guru: Android doesn't have malware, it has Potentially Harmful Applications™ instead

Evil Auditor
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FAIL

Malware

It's bloody simple, isn't it? Malware is software on my device that does something without my (implicit or explicit) consent.

Google is probably trying to pull the users up their own reality distortion hole. Problem is, not many will care...

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LOHAN unleashes 'waiting for the FAA' collector mug

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: 2nd picture of dark haired woman

"lovely young lady"?

All I saw was the absence of a proper boffin's pipe.

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