* Posts by Evil Auditor

1408 posts • joined 13 Jan 2009

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US Navy's LASER CANNON WARSHIP: USS Ponce sent to Gulf

Evil Auditor
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Re: Nobody has answered the important question

Don't know. But now I have this image in my head of a pimply-faces operator at its controls, going 'pew-pew, pew-pew-pew...'

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Evil Auditor
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Re: Ouch, my eyes...

Being blinded is terrible. But I'm not sure if this was my first concern if being hit by this laser cannon...

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Shhhhh! It's a Swiss Sunday shutdown. Kill the lawnmower, punish the kids with CHEESE

Evil Auditor
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@stu 4

You had a bad day, didn't you?

That would explain where your unsubstantiated rant came from...

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Hawking: RISE of the MACHINES could DESTROY HUMANITY

Evil Auditor
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Re: Its already here

You beat me to it! It was my exact thought when reading the article. Although before I still wondered why the AI came out now - but it all makes sense!

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Disturbance in the force lets phones detect gestures with Wi-Fi

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

That's nothing!

I can already switch off my jesus phone with telepathy. Simply have to strongly think "switch off!" for about twenty hours...

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Hey, it's ... Gecko man, Gecko man, does almost whatever a GECKO can

Evil Auditor
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Devil

"The pads are made of polydimethylsiloxane"

Sure. Now tell me, how many geckoes had to die?

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Vulture 2 spaceplane tumbles onto BBC World Service

Evil Auditor
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Mushroom

Die Welt

"Unsere Rakete ist schon flugfähig, anders als die von Richard Branson", sagt Lester Haines

How true...

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Far Cry 4 REVIEW: It's a far cry from Far Cry 3

Evil Auditor
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Re: Not quite sure...

ShelLuser, I agree, FC4 seems like reissue of FC3.

I really enjoyed the realism of FC2 - a really open world, no head-up displays, no magic visual tracking of enemies, a map you could hold in your virtual hand while roaming etc. FC3 brought a nice story line and felt less repetitive compared to FC2. But all those glass limits ("Warning! Leaving mission zone...") were a distraction and overall it was way too easy, e.g. the enemy tracking, and at one point I couldn't be bothered to collect loot anymore because my wallet replenished without effort.

Would be nice if not bringing out a different game altogether, at least combine the realism and difficulty of FC2 with an interesting story and divers missions as in FC3. Judging from the trailers unfortunately this doesn't happen. Going to play it anyway, even if only for the beautiful landscape - the visual aspects already sold it to me.

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Pharmacist caught spying on friends' med records fined £1,000

Evil Auditor
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Need-to-know

At least they do audits in this regard. But why did he have access to those records in the first place? One would think his access could and should have been limited to data related to the local residential care homes.

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Cold? Cuddle these HOT GERMAN RACKS, yours for only 12,000 euro – we swear there's an IT angle

Evil Auditor
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Re: So...

@AC, I guess that's why they are located in Germany only. I would hope that all the data is encrypted, preferably already when arriving and never be in clear text at the hosts' places. That should protect both their clients and hosts. Well, one can hope...

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Evil Auditor
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Re: So...

Compare the €12k to the cost of a conventional heating, i.e. the initial investment, maintenance, energy. As you and the article mentioned, the real open question is cooling during the summer.

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Wind farms make you sick claims blown away again

Evil Auditor
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Re: Not just windmill nutters

And now you're going to explain how a powerless GSM mast creates infrasound?

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Poll: Yes, yes, texting while driving is bad but *ping* OH! Hey, GRAB THE WHEEL, will ya?

Evil Auditor
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Cure

Put them on stand-by for some systems' incident respond team and after a day or two their dopamine level starts increasing the long the phone stays silent.

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Watchdog bites hotel booking site: Over 3k card details slurped

Evil Auditor
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£7'500?

...but the ICO was required to consider the firm’s financial situation...

So, if you're bad business people you get away with such "fuckwittery of the highest order"*?

*thanks, AC

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Evil Auditor
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Re: SQL Injection!!!

Never underestimate the stupidity of users developers.

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Spaceplane fan sips sweet nectar from LOHAN's copious cup

Evil Auditor
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Re: My mug is a virgin

It currently holds my torque drivers, a finger skateboard and a solid silver dolphin for a charm bracelet

And you call that a virgin?!

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New GCHQ spymaster: US tech giants are 'command and control networks for TERROR'

Evil Auditor
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@1. 2. 3.

I agree, some things on the internet are wrong, e.g. fraudulent or otherwise criminal. Is it really a lot, i.e. a significant part? I doubt.

But what is wrong with obscene, or seditious content? You (or the mentioned man) may not like it, but that doesn't make it plain wrong, let alone needed to be stopped.

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Evil Auditor
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Re: well said Evil Auditor

@R69

You don't do irony, do you? I had some troubles to decide which parts of your comment are bad and which are worse. I almost agreed to your "If you want to protect the freedoms..." but in my humble opinion, there is no if, there is no option to protecting the freedom. (Just like The_Idiot I shall refrain from quoting Ben Franklin.)

Yes, freedom is not free. It comes at a cost which I am absolutely willing to pay.

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Evil Auditor
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You're welcome!

On second thoughts, who knows, maybe Hannigan was right, even if not for all internet users. Neither you, AC, nor I became chief spook, nor would we ever be considered for such a position - because we lack the ability to know what hoi polloi is comfortable with.

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Evil Auditor
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"would be comfortable with a better and more sustainable relationship between the [intelligence] agencies and the tech companies"

No.*

*of course, I for one am only speaking for myself and don't claim to know what other internet users think.

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DR LIPS warns: DON'T KISS that NEWT - it's got FLESH-EATING PLAGUE

Evil Auditor
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Licking those amphibians...

poses mainly a problem for the lizard people, innit?

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Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

Re: Sounds fair

If you want the pussy, you need a bigger kitty.

Here, fixed that for you

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Evil Auditor
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Re: special place in Hell reserved for this guy

And what kind of cretin pays $140k for a cat? (I know the calculation is a bit far-fetched, but never mind)

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Batman in the frame to take on Steve Jobs

Evil Auditor
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At least we know there won't be a sequel, don't we?

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LOHAN crash lands on CNN

Evil Auditor
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Re Lester Haines

Agreed. But hey, at least now we know Lester's age! (If by any chance she got that right)

Although I'm not sure if Lester agrees with the other attributes given to him: burly and bald. Are you, Lester?

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World govts elect Swiss big cheese as their new ICANN point man

Evil Auditor
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Happy

@ Donotunderstandwhatthismeans

Your handle refers to the article, I hope.

ps.

Congratulations to Thomas Schneider!

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Influential scribe Charles Petzold: How I figured out the Windows API

Evil Auditor
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Re: Thank you Mr. Petzold

I totally agree with you! Problem is, I don't remember which of his books I used. But it's funny, after all those years in which I haven't touched any Windows programming, to finally see a person behind this then omnipresent name Petzold.

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Here's your chance to buy an ancient, working APPLE ONE

Evil Auditor
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Re: "can't even send a tweet?"?

@Martin-73

No, downvotes simply because it's jake.

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Evil Auditor
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Re: "can't even send a tweet?"?

Once the prices of ol' computer kit advances into spheres usually occupied by the contemporary art market, we'll soon see similar side effects, i.e. jakes producing forgeries. Here we already have the suitable provenance: ... booted up in August by Apple expert Corey Cohen. It must be real!

So jake, what you need besides a few $100 for the parts, is a Corey Cohen to attest it's origin. (Hint: at least in the art market such "experts" can be convinced to render the expert opinion you're looking for. Shouldn't be such a problem with computers...)

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Foxconn exec on iPhone 6: You're BENDING it WRONG

Evil Auditor
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Re: Zen of Apple

Nah, he'd say you're holding it wrong!

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HOT BABES! Worried you won't get that JOB in IT? MENTION how hot you are

Evil Auditor
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Re: Did I miss the bit about attractiveness?

I can only guess that from the point of view of a poor tech sod, every female looks attractive.

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Japan develops robot CHEERLEADERS which RIDE on BALLS

Evil Auditor
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Happy

Re: Cute!

Good that internet isn't that far developed, otherwise I'd have accused you of infecting me.

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iPAD-FONDLING fanboi sparks SECURITY ALERT at Sydney airport

Evil Auditor
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Stop

Muppets. And for once I don't mean the fondleslabbed zombie.

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Who.is does the Harlem Shake

Evil Auditor
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Re: What an awesome way to demonstrate a vunerability

Thumb up! Despite the misuse of awesome ;)

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Moon landing was real and WE CAN PROVE IT, says Nvidia

Evil Auditor
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Trollface

To all conspiracy muppets out there

So, Nvidia was bought by NASA.

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Oh God the RUBBER on my SHAFT has gone wrong and is STICKING to things

Evil Auditor
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Re keyboard life-forms

That's why I take the keyboard to the sink every couple of months. Not that I'd mind the life-forms per se. But I can't stand when it bites my fingers when I fall asleep again at work.

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Ballmer PERSONALLY wrote Windows' Blue Screen of Death text

Evil Auditor
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Re: Give rhe devil his due .,,

Couldn't agree more.

Had to make use of this bloody BSOD while developing NT device drivers. Still have nightmares of useless dumps popping at my head.

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Sex is great in books, lousy in apps, says Apple

Evil Auditor
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Re: "Sex is great in books.... "

They wouldn't know for sure. They have only read about it.

Phew... there was me, being scared to death by the thought that they might even procreate...

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Evil Auditor
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Joke

"Sex is great in books.... "

And I thought sex was great having. Stupid me! You live and learn...

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Crack team weighs LOHAN's substantial box

Evil Auditor
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Re: "Seven" and "one"

Strange life-forms, those missuses. I mean, I don't give a toss about football, being it any cup or not. And she hates football. Unless another WC comes along... Seven and one would, unfortunately, only partly work as there are another two nations incorporated into her.

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Uber alles... nein! Deutschland imposes NATIONWIDE BAN on taxi app

Evil Auditor
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The temporary injunction only bans Uber from arranging taxi services with unlicensed drivers (given they charge more than the pure cost of operation). As far as I'm concerned, I can neither see why this should be a bad thing or prevent progress. It only seems that Uber needs to vet its drivers. If I want some unlicensed drivers I can make use of one of the illegal minicab drivers that loiter in the early hours around London's night clubs.

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Russia: SEXY LIZARDS which landed FROM SPACE are all DEAD

Evil Auditor
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Re: Geckos! Frozen Geckos!

They all taste like chicken.

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Evil Auditor
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"Hope they were insured!"

Who, the geckos or Roscosmos?

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If you think 3D printing is just firing blanks, just you wait

Evil Auditor
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"Fuck yeah!"

You're being ironic about irony...?

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Boffins attempt to prove the UNIVERSE IS JUST A HOLOGRAM

Evil Auditor
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Boffin

Re: Excellent

it might explain other strange phenomena like odd socks being eaten by the washing machine

This has already sufficiently been explained and got nothing to do with crazy universe models: it's the other pieces of clothing agreeing on sacrificing a sock to the Great God of Washing. Proof: put only one sock on its own through the washing cycle and it won't disappear - socks usually are not suicidal.

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Experimental hypersonic SUPERMISSILE destroyed 4 SECONDS after US launched it

Evil Auditor
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Re "which could potentially bypass missile defences"

On a more serious note, I'd say it could potentially bypass today's missile defences. Once such weapons become feasible surely the development of defence systems wouldn't stagnate.

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Evil Auditor
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"Happily no one was hurt"

No dauntless playmonaut on board? No wonder it failed.

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Huawei: 'Tizen has no chance', Windows Phone is 'difficult'... it's Android all the way

Evil Auditor
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Coat

Re "...can lead to internal friction"

internal friction aka corporate masturbation.

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