* Posts by Evil Auditor

2616 publicly visible posts • joined 13 Jan 2009

Ad agency boss owned two Ferraris but wouldn't buy a real server

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Re: The owner has two Ferraris. They have that kind of money

Most people who buy a Ferrari don't to it to be faster. They buy it because they want to be seen as a Ferrari owner.

Intern with superuser access 'promoted' himself to CEO

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In the good old days, when phones were rather heavy desktop devices, didn't need nor have a display beyond a couple of LEDs, and before e-mail was a thing... With two phones next to each other, you phoned two different people and then put the two handsets opposite each other to enjoy the development of a random discussion ("...you phoned me." - "No, you phoned me!" etc.)

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That thought did cross our minds, too. But given that it was the CEO of a major international financial institution, chances were dim for the recipient to not pick up the clue. And even had they replied, it probably would have been filtered out by a CEO's assistant.

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That is indeed a difficult situation to resist. Ours was an internal *nix server that unnecessarily ran an unprotected mail server. So, wethe CEO decided to send a rather sarcastic e-mail to the person responsible to inform them of the open mail server on their machine.

You got legal trouble? Better call SauLM-7B

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Re: Legal Opinions generated By AI?

Surely, it will still be more consistent than what "sovereign citizens", "freeman", "Reichsburger" and other fscktards compile for the entertainment of the legal system.

Swiss cheese security? Play ransomware gang milks government of 65,000 files

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I agree with you and am fully aware of Switzerland's privileged situation embedded within friendly neighbours.

With freeloading I was rather referring to its refusal to supply "spiritual allies" (being neutral, it cannot enter into military alliances), which indirectly also defend Switzerland's security in Russia's war(s), with munitions and even mine clearing equipment.

Switzerland's laws forbid exporting munitions to conflicting parties. On the other hand, they happily exported munitions to countries that have been involved in armed conflicts, e.g. USA, Saudi Arabia, UK, France. Mind you, in total it's not that big of a business, amounting to less than GBP1 bn per year.

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I'm not sure whether encryption of storage or transport would have worked in this case. But I certainly agree that dealing with such sensitive data they should have had better preventive and detective measures in place (which is kind of self-explanatory ex post). I find a rather unsatisfying explanation what Xplain writes in the link you've provided («Hackers like "Play" group usually leave no traces»).

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Coat

Surely, that must have been a mistake. I mean, why would someone attack Switzerland?! It is, after all, a neutral country and should therefore be exempt from any hostile activity. I do expect and hope that the Federal Council will, with utmost urgency, initiate an information campaign about the country's neutrality to prevent future attacks. Or isn't that what they do in other threat scenarios?

On a more serious note, it's not the only country with its national security freeloading on others. At least, with cyber security that doesn't work so well.

Air National Guardsman Teixeira to admit he was Pentagon files leaker

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...if a tycoon born into immense privilege and wealth can avoid a stretch behind bars awaiting a similar trial, so should I...

Not the sharpest tool in the box, is he?

Chinese 'connected' cars are a national security threat, says Biden

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Re: Came to say the same thing

Orwell's remains cannot speak due to their fast spinning. But if he could, he would shout: «IT WAS A WARNING, NOT AN INSTRUCTION!»

It's that most wonderful time of the year when tech cannot handle the date

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Re: Don't people test edge cases any more?

Apparently, no, they don't. As I had to learn when recently auditing interest calculations. And it wasn't even such an edge case as all - just the totally unexpected fact that February doesn't have 30 days.

They call me 'Growler'. I don't like you. Let's discuss your pay cut

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Re: Tout au contraire.

Not only during an interview process but more generally in conducting business...

Mine was Sleaze, not Growler - a boss I had the misfortune to encounter. He'd got incredibly excited when learning that someone had more than two pairs of dress shoes, showed an unhealthy interest in explaining the dangling of his testicles, demonstrated a mind-boggling amount of incompetence, and called me (not directly but I had a well-established network) an arsehole - I might have mentioned him here before. Anyhow, one day I received a request for tender from Sleaze's business unit. And happily had it answered along the lines of «we cannot possibly offer our services on this matter.»

The No Arsehole Rule -thank you, Robert Sutton- applies not only to staff but also to (potential) clients and business partners.

Mamas, don't let your babies grow up to be coders, Jensen Huang warns

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Re: nailed it

One day, Plest, we shall meet while taking photos in Scotland...

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I fully understand. The problem is that my lardy arse got used to a lifestyle that requires a relatively high income, certainly much higher than what I'd get with making things by hand.

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Joke

Become a toilet manufacturer. As long as there are people, there is crap.

Palantir boss says outfit's software the only reason the 'goose step' has not returned to Europe

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Re: "the only reason why someone's not goose-stepping between me and you is my product. Say thank

This. Or* he forgot his medication, again.

*or, not xor

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Brilliant! Same as Deutsche "Backpfeifengesicht"?

Cybercrims: When we hit IT, they sometimes pay, but when we hit OT... jackpot

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but when we hit OT... jackpot

They may be right. But it's also not that surprising to read this from an opsec firm. I somehow fail to see that much of a difference whether it's manufacturing or another industry when an attack hits their revenue generation.

BOFH: In the event of a conference, the ninja clause always applies

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Toasted bread - now you are talking! For that, indeed, sliced white is my preferred basis. While usually consumed with a proper British Breakfast, I'll have to try your egg toastie...

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That's a bit harsh towards cows. And orks.

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You've got a good point there.

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Brilliant! Have to remember those...

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Conspirationalised humanoid?

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Joke

Jebus Freakin Crist Spartacus! What is this sandwich that you proclaim? Anyhow, not much into bacon sandwich to begin with...

Quality bread IS essential and sliced white is - does this even qualify as bread?! And then it simply has to be "prosciutto crudo", preferably from Parma. I agree on the other non-ingredients though.

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I refrain from social events. That eliminated the need for consuming alcoholic beverages altogether.

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"Any meeting longer than 30 minutes or of great boredom (my judgement) induces the right to snooze away."

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...which involves a two-hour drive trapped in a vehicle with a work colleague...

...who believes that Bill Gates is buying all the land world-wide (and the Moon and Mars), who heard the Head of WHO proclaiming the decimation of world population to 10 per cent, and who knows that Covid doesn't exist and in fact was invented to reach the mentioned population target. Before you ask, yes, this colleague did happen and yes, I wish it didn't.

Work for you? Again? After you lied about the job and stole my stuff? No thanks

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Might Travis have kept any notes describing how to revive the machine?

Had he answered "yes", they would have fscked him all over for not returning all the information that belonged to the company.

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Re: "And to this day, the more he dislikes someone, the more polite he is towards them."

I carefullyresentfully decide which bridges to burn. But even in hindsight they turned out to be the right ones.

Tesla's Cybertruck may not be so stainless after all

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Re: Cybertruck - the gift that keeps on giving...

Did hesitate a bit, but this is actually true as those Italian cars didn't show a sign of rust after a couple of days in the rain.

Mind you, what you see on the Tesla is merely cosmetical and the structural integrity of it might (!) be more resistant than a 70s Alfa Rusteo. While I can't recall the model (maybe Alfasud Sprint) but do remember that the car jack would go higher and higher through the cassis without lifting the car a bit - it was held together by paint and faith.

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Re: until the Cybertruck is scheduled for a full wash

But, Tesla did not forget how to sell a shiny car and what happens afterwards will be the buyers' problem.

Apple Vision Pro has densest display iFixit's ever seen, and almost-OK repairability

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Re: "If face goggles really are the future of computing..."

It's been a while since, and it took me a while to retrieve, but I believe this is the one I was referring to:

Pranav Mistry

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Re: "If face goggles really are the future of computing..."

Years ago in a TED(x?) talk, a guy presented augmented reality without silly goggles but a projector which augmented surfaces with information. While this certainly wasn't ready for market it did seem, at least to me, as a much more useful and natural way than a bulky, self-important, don't-you-fucking-talk-to-me facial tool.

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Devil

...another job for the boys in blue...

Don't you have some faith in Darwin?

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Are they still glassholes or rather virgin bros?

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Re: 50 Virgin Bro pixels

...how "Vision" became "Virgin" and "Pro" became "Bro"...

And I thought the typos were V and B instead of v and b, and singular bro instead of plural.

CERN is training robot dogs to spot radiation hazards at Large Hadron Collider

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Alien

Re: I have questions

Water and fire to fight the aliens. They took that from the documentaries Alien 3 and Aliens respectively.

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Re: Robodog

They did manage to find robocat though: curled up snoozing in a tin box. Still, pretty useless.

40 years ago, an astronaut first took flight from the Space Shuttle

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Oh, I'd love to see someone trying...

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Re: Fake!

and the parts in the shade would be pitch dark.

Half of polled infosec pros say their degree was less than useful for real-world work

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Re: "Security technology — and tech in general — moves fast and becomes "legacy"

they just wanted to be fed and regurgitate standard template policies...

There's a whole industry (sub-)segment out there catering for exactly that market. And, occasionally, I'm called in after some "consultant" left a template mess behind to bring in some workable structure (which is another market). And, probably, after me some true infosec professional is hired to get things actually done.

Techie climbed a mountain only be told not to touch the kit on top

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Sent somewhere for a futile job? Well, I'm an auditor... Anyhow, speaking of cold mountain top: unfortunately, it wasn't me but former acquaintances who had to tend to microwave transmission equipment. The (cable-bound) aerial lift to the mountain top was not running at that time and the only (feasible) option left was a helicopter flight. Just to find that something had been "misdiagnosed" and the issue was on the other side of the link.

We put salt in our tea so you don't have to

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Yeah. And who on Earth buys all those tea bags?!

...and so do I whenever I get hold of a package of PG or Yorkshire. More for nostalgic reason, as they are not readily available everywhere on the continent.

Standards-obsessed boss ignored one, and suffered all night for his sin

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Happy

Re: is to gradually push less

Both.

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Re: Needless!!

jmch: I would have thought...

Exactly, you would have thought. And hence you wouldn't have moved the rack in the first place.

Poor communication led to complete lack of communication

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Testing was! Just not during a project phase when sane people would do.

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Never heard of Zoho before but generally, if you use such third-party service in a client project, wouldn't you have project-specific subscriptions?

Fujitsu will not bid for UK.gov business until Post Office inquiry closes

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Re: A few points.

Unless Fujitsu meddled with Horizon without involving PO, I don't really see how they can be held responsible. Unless, of course, the investigation takes place in a banana republic...

Junior techie had leverage, but didn’t appreciate the gravity of the situation

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Re: Curious 6000kva?

Thanks for the XKCD reference!

...as for the swimming, I also dream of dodging bullets, Neo-style.

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Devil

«He knows it was a mistake to let the minion do the job unattended.»

Whether it was a mistake depends entirely on how much he disliked the minion. For minions high on the spectrum of personal dislike, giving them an improbably difficult task ("job empowerment!") and watch them fail from afar (pure, evil joy aka schadenfreude) is the way to go.

And before you jump to conclusions or worse, action, this post may contain irony.