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* Posts by /\/\j17

263 posts • joined 26 Apr 2007

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In a mall at the weekend? WORSE STILL, are you LOST?

/\/\j17

You are Here

Or they could just download (proper) Nokia's Here maps that has internal maps for things like shopping centres and railway stations.

The latter is down to a suprising low level, so even my local rail station is covered - that's 2 platforms and 1 booking office on the level 1 and the walkway of the bridge between platforms on level 2!

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MOULDY DICK: France aims to snatch EXPLODING WHALE crown from U.S.

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Coat

Re: facemask?

"Why wasn't he wearing a facemask, as he clearly expected it to squirt everywhere?"

That's what she said...

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HP's pet lizard is FERAL PERIL says wildlife group

/\/\j17

Missed one

But not in Australia, which has a long history of introduced species overrunning locals. Europeans humans, Rabbits, camels, foxes and the cane toad are all imported pests in Australia.

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Nokia: Read these Maps, Samsung – we're HERE for the Gear

/\/\j17
FAIL

Re: You can take the Nokia out of Finland

Umm, you DO realise that the Nokia that owns HERE maps is the one that's still in Finland and NOT the one that was sold to Microsoft (the devices and services business) don't you...?

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Mozilla's 'Tiles' ads debut in new Firefox nightlies

/\/\j17

"But I'm still locked on FireFox 27. The last user-friendly version that lets me put my tabs underneath my shortcut bar, and to allow an add-on bar."

Or you could update to Firefox 31 and just install the "Classic Theme Restorer" add-on like everyone else... Fixes both your gripes in one.

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Cheer up, Nokia fans. It can start making mobes again in 18 months

/\/\j17
FAIL

Re: Microsoft bought Nokia because ...

"I though Microsoft bought Nokia because they wanted the patents....and now they have them....."

Fail - real Nokia still owns the IP pool and HERE maps. Microsoft only bought the Lumia brand and devices business (along with 10yr licence on the IP / HERE bundled on Mokia phones for 4 yrs).

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Don't put that duffel bag full of cash in the hotel room safe

/\/\j17

YouTube my friends

Plenty of videos on YouTube about how to 'break' in to hotel room safes. The lock's just controlled by a sprung solinoid. Enter the correct code and the solinoid energises/pulls the in down allowing the handle to turn. After a timeout/when you close the door the solinoid de-energises and a spring pushes the pin back up to stop the handle turning.

Hold the handle in the open direction and give the top of the door a good thump and the precusive actions usually enough to drop the pin down against the spring enough to release the handle. See from 60sec in - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcYB9ceiAiY

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Nokia emits Windows Phone 8.1 'Cyan' upgrade for Lumia gear

/\/\j17

HERE Maps != Microsoft

Please remember that Microsoft DON'T own HERE Maps - that's part of Nokia.

Microsoft only bought the Lumia brand and divices and services business, and a licence to the Nokia brand for devices.

There is still an independent Nokia business that owns HERE Maps (with a 4-year licencing deal with Microsoft to bundle on their phones for 4 years), the IP portfolio (10-year MS licence).

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'Ribbed' for your pleasure: Jony Ive unveils NAKED IPHONE

/\/\j17

"a technique of fusing glass pieces together in a way that makes the whole structure strong enough to withstand an impact."

A bold claim - from a company who's current phones seem to last about a week in most people's hands before becoming a work of shattered glass!

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F1? No, it's Formula E as electric racing cars hit the track

/\/\j17

Yep, really confused by the reference to LMP1-H (Le Mans Prototype class 1, Hybrid sub-class) which is currently being contested by Audi, Porsche and Toyota in the FIA/ACO World Endurance Championship.

Nissan, who are due to join the LMP1-H class next year were running a hybrid at this years Le Mans 24hr race that managed to do a whole lap on battery power (this is grown-up racing where a laps' 13.6km and at night-time it gets dark but the drivers just keep driving at 205mph - though was 250mph in the 80's, rather than requiring more lights than a million Christmas trees).

None of the above have any direct links to either Buemi or Red Bull that spring to mind though. Closest I can think of is that Mark Webber is now driving the Porsche LMP1-H and used to drive for the Infinity Red Bull F1 team.

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Surprise! Google chairman blasts EU's privacy ruling

/\/\j17

An unnamed source, presumably from within Google, told Reuters that the company will need to assemble an "army of removal experts" in the 28 nations across the EU to deal with the requests.

Or to spin it the other way - this judgement will lead to the creation of hundreads of new jobs, helping boost the economic recovery across the EU!

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Why two-player games > online gaming: See your pal's shock as you bag a last-second victory

/\/\j17

Online = Loser / Split-screen = Friends

Never really got in to online play myself - just too solitary (I don't class chatting on a headset as being social).

Give me a couple of friends, some bottles of alcohol and a some (except where it's funny to shoot your mate in the back) co-op Modern Warfare violence, or an evening at the pub followed by some drunken split-screen sport action* any day.

* Running in with a sliding tackel on a stationary keeper NEVER gets old if you've drunk enough.

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Blighty goes retro with 12-sided pound coin

/\/\j17

Why's there a man in drag on the front of the coin?

That's what I want to know.

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Your 'funny' cat pics are weighing down the web, so here's a better JPEG encoder from Mozilla

/\/\j17

Depends WHO'S Bandwidth You're Talking About...

"Except of course that for most of us bandwidth is no longer a problem. Bit late coming this one, like a decade."

For me at home, no bandwidth isn't really a problem.

For me at work bandwidth's a bloody expensive problem!

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Facebook fans fuel FAGGOT FURY firestorm

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Re: How gay!!

I don't actually see what his intended context has to do with it.

Taken as either a reference to a foodstuff or persons of a specific sexual persuasion the statement "I like faggots" can hardle be seen as gay-hating behaviour. Here is a man who LIKES said faggots. If he had said "I HATE faggots" maybe there's room for the easilly outraged to be outraged.

We now appear to live in a world where LIKING something is a hate crime!

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Microsoft: YES! You can have your desktop back again for FREE!

/\/\j17

“It will be easy to get it right from the Windows Start screen through the app store,”

Hopefully it will be available via Windows Update or a direct download too as I can't access the app store on my Win8 machine - it's a Netbook so falls below Metro's minimum screen resolution.

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Review: BlackBerry Q10

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Re: A second attempt.

"From their model 9110 onwards till the 9300 they had keyboards that really worked."

What was wrong with the keyboard on the 9000 that came before the 9110? What was wrong with the keyboards on E90 and E7 that followed the 9300?

Quite why the US still gets a reasonable range of qwerty slider phone but they don't get released outside the US I don't know.

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Holy classic car auction, Batman! They sold THE Batmobile!

/\/\j17

Re: Rick Champagne

"You can't use the name "Champagne" unless you're from the appropriate bit of France."

That's only EU legislation and so only applies inside the EU. The US isn't so any old fizzy-pop can be labelled Champagne over there.

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Perth porkfest crowned ULTIMATE BACON SARNIE

/\/\j17
FAIL

It's Not a Frigging Sarnie Though!!!!

Sarnie -> informal for Sandwich.

Sandwich -> Two or more slices of bread with a filling.

Roll -> A small rounded portion of bread.

=> Roll != Sandwich

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Just how good is Nokia's PureView 41Mp camera tech?

/\/\j17
FAIL

Re: instagram?!

"Nokia Belle also lacks the support of many applications readily available for Android and iOS – Instagram, being one example..."

Umm, no. Just no.

In what way can Nokia Belle lack support for an application? The application developer may not have released a version of their application for Nokia Belle but that's just crapness on the application developers part and hardly Nokia's fault!

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Mobe app makers doubt Windows 8 will be worth the hassle - poll

/\/\j17

If only...

If only someone like Nokia could come up with a unified mobile development platform, so you could write once and compile for all sorts of different platforms/operating systems/screen sizes and resolutions/etc.

Or rather, if only Nokia hadn't dumped Qt, in no small part because Microsoft didn't want the competition for windows phone development.

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Vote now for the ULTIMATE BACON SARNIE

/\/\j17
Stop

WFT El Reg?!?

Come on El Reg, at least try and get your facts straight.

1) Sarnie - (UK, informal) a sandwich.

2) Sandwich - A snack formed of various ingredients between two slices of bread.

So NOT a roll, muffin, baguette or bagle.

Removing these ineligible, non-sliced bread options brings the list down from 26 to 13.

3) Toasty (Toastie) - (Cookery) a toasted sandwich.

4) Toast - Bread browned by exposure to radiant heat.

As such you can not use Toast to make a Sarnie, as you are no longer using bread but toast. you are creating a Toasty.

Removing these ineligible, not-bread options bring the list down from 13 to an actually list of bacon sarnies of 6:

- The Bi-bacon Bounty

- The Sunny Side Down

- The Norn Iron Soda

- The Trearddur Bay Black Ops

- The Black, Brown and White

- The Cheezilla

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W3C reveals plan to finish HTML5 and HTML 5.1

/\/\j17

Re: What, XHTML is forgotten already?

"No, they wanted to stop website from returning a yellow screen of XML death just because some web author somewhere forgot to close a break tag."

So now we define our standards to avoid embarrassing the lazy or incompetent? At least with XHTML you knew you could point an app at it and process it as XML. With HTML5 you'll be able to do that for SOME pages (because they use HTML5 with the XML syntax) but not for other, unidentifiable ones.

Great.

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Amazon cosies up to Nokia for Google Maps alternative

/\/\j17

Re: Navigation

That must have been a while-ago then as the version I have on my E7 has consigned the old sat-nav box the the drawer and almost always out-performs Google Maps when it comes to routing, managing to knock 1/5th off my walk to work through central London.

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Apple, Samsung blast away in patent case closing arguments

/\/\j17
WTF?

What's the most bazzar thing a lawyer can say in a patent infringement trial?

According to (Apple attorney Bill Lee, the question was not whether Samsung infringed Apple's patents, but "whether they get a get-out-of-jail-free card."

So this patent infringement trial ISN'T about whether patents were infringed? WTF?

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El Reg probes pregnant Playmobil lass

/\/\j17

Pregnant...

...or just a fat lass with the last crumbs of cake stuck to her face?

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Ten... Qwerty mobiles

/\/\j17

What a waste of bits

Like many fellow commentards I'm also a fan of slide out QWERTY phones so read the story with interest...leading to dissapointment. Are there really NO new slide out QWERTY phone out there at the moment?

Looks like the Nokia E7 for a while longer - even if it was better running Anna than Belle. Wonder if we will ever see Carla/Donna...?

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Cameron 'to change his mind' on the one thing he got right in Defence

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FAIL

Re: He we go again ...

So let me get this right, it's Brit-bashing.

Suggesting we buy the US F16 or the US F35C or the French Rafales in preference to the US F35B is Brit-bashing and not supporting UK industry...

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Google answers less than half of watchdog's privacy tweak questions

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Re: Surely...

Well the EU Agency for Fundamental Rights' advice on DPAs is that they should be:

- independent guardians of privacy.

- efficient one-stop shops for all data protection concerns of citizens and other persons.

It DOESN'T say they are there to advise companies at the companies beck and call. That's what a companies own lawyers are for.

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Ice age end was accelerated by CO2

/\/\j17
Stop

How do you find evidence in ice for the end of the LAST ice age...?

I'm a little confused by this one. How can you find evidence in polar ice for the end of the LAST ice age?

As an ice age is defined as a period with permanent ice on the surface of the earth the ice they are looking at in the Antarctic will be from the CURRENT, Quaternary ice age that started 2.58 million years-ago and is still in the process of ending (hence the presence of ice at the poles) and by definition hasn't yet ended.

The LAST ice age that actually had an end would be the Karoo, 360 to 260 million years-ago.

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BBC boss Mark Thompson sets quit date

/\/\j17

He won't be missed!

As someone who had the pleasure of Mr Thompson during his brief tenure at Channel4 I can tell you he won't be missed!

Move everyone to a facility 'oop north' where no-one wants to work and nothing works then bugger-off to leave the whole mess to someone else.

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Sun belches wonking solar flare

/\/\j17

Re: Any chance of times in GMT?

Well if the boffins across the pond were true scientists they would be quiting all times in UTC anyway...

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Audi shows off OLED-illuminated concept R8

/\/\j17

"Audi admitted that commercialising such jiggery pokery will take years"

Unless you consider using LED-only lighting on their R18 Le Mans prototype race cars commercialising it of course...

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Apple issues invitations to March 7 iPad roll-out

/\/\j17

El Reg actually got an invite? From Apple? ^_^

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Freedom-crushing govts close to ruling our web, fears FCC boss

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Pot / Kettle

"Foreign governments are lining up to wrest control of the internet from freedom-loving hippies..."

So tell me Mr McDowell, how IS the US Gov. SOAP bill coming along...?

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US Navy preps railgun for tests

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A rather simplistic, one-sided view.

If we assume some foreign power has managed to invade and hold Europe, between Russia and the Atlantic coast we must assume they have some neat toys of their own. For example they probably have their own railguns able to fire 100nm.

Now add that in to your view of WW2 and you have the whole US invasion force being killed on the South coast of England as they board the ships to France...

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Nokia axes 4,000, shifts smartphone manufacturing East

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Stop

"...the Belle UI is excellent."

It is?

With the upgrade release yesterday I upgraded my E7 last night and...have been trying to find out how I go back to Anna ever since.

Excellence must mean "making everything bigger so it takes up more space and loosing/obfuscating useful functionality".

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VW catches electric Beetle

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Wrong Stand! Wrong Stand!

Alun, you're on THE WRONG STAND!

Move away from the VAG stand and take a look at the Honda/Acura one - the next (hybrid) NSX is much more interesting than another Beatle.

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Nokia sheds light on latest Lumia

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WTF?

"but the addition of video-calling will be warmly welcomed"

By whom exactly?

Other than press shots for 3 back in 2003 or videos for Apple in 2011 who's ever seen someone making a video call on a mobile phone...?

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Virtual sanity: How to get a grip on your home PCs

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Trollface

When you've managed to get SlingPlayer working on Linux you will let me know won't you - it's the main reason I installed Windows 7 on my Netbook, over Linux.

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Mythbusters cannonball ‘myth-fires’

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Stop

Chicken / Egg

Most people in the US AREN'T bemused when their plywood and spit house gets burnt down by a firest fire or blown away by a hurricane/tornado.

In large swaths of the US it's not IF you property could be caust in the local natural disaster of choice but WHEN. As such when it happens most Americans are just happy they only had to pay the insurance for/cost fo rebuilding a plywood and spit house, not the cost of insuring and rebuilding a brick one.

In the UK people don't really understand what a hurricane (for example) is. Hell, many people in the South East of England still think Michael Fish was wrong in 1987 when he said there wasn't a hurricane coming but he wasn't. There WASN'T a hurricane, it was just a bit windy with some gusts at hurricane force on the Beaufort scale. That's quite different from a hurricane where it's not the gusts that are hurricane force but the whole thing.

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Microsoft tempts with WinPho demo on... iPhone

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Trollface

So, just like in the desktop world Apple users just end up buying over-priced hardware and then run Windows on it to do anything useful!

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Global warming much less serious than thought - new science

/\/\j17
Childcatcher

Hush, before someone hears you!

"They have 'merely' [I jest] conducted a scientific analysis and produced a model based on many factors which, **if correct**, show that the likelihood is much less."

That sounds almost like...science! Isn't that blasphemy when it some to a climate change discussion?

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/\/\j17
FAIL

None of the above - the 'you' in the sentence refers to The Australian.

If Thought About IT was actually called Read The Article Properly they may have noticied the following:

"THE AUSTRALIAN quotes Schmittner as saying: "Now these very large changes..."

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Britain's Harrier jump-jets reprieved to fly and fight again

/\/\j17
Stop

Missing The Point (of no return)

The point here is that the runway IS short but we are forced to operate an aircraft that really requires a longer one at that altitude to take off safely, without endangering the airframe in the case of a late take-off abort.

We USED to have one designed specifically to take off on short runways, so ideal to operate from that strip in at least the close air support role...

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HP extends deadline as Autonomy shareholders drag feet

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Given the financial house of cards that is Autonomy I'm amazed more haven't jumped on the band wagon to sure up the companies financial situation.

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Anonymous/LulzSec chick-lit MP kid threat pooh-poohed

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Natural Home

[EMI fired me for] "Leaving work early" and "missing the odd day at work" along with "inappropriate dress".

I don't know about inappropriate dress but the other two sound like standard practice for an MP...

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Symbian Anna makes her debut

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FAIL

Bloated? Symbian?

So let me get this straight. The built-from-the-ground-up-for-low-powered-low-memory-devices O/S is the bloated one, not one of the pruned-down-from-a-desktop-or-server one's are the slimline ones...?

Really?

I'll keep my 'bloated' Symbian phone and you can keep your 'slimline' Linux/Windows/OSX (with the odd desktop debugger left in).

Oh, and can you tell the other 6 Meego users, ta.

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Good news: A meltdown would kill fewer than we thought

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Pirate

What caused them to change their tune?

I'm sure it's nothing to do with them being a vested interest in the nuclear power industry and there being a significant accident/string of accidents in Japan that have dented public confidence in the whole creating-radioactive-shit-for-future-generations-to-worry-about industry...

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Oracle: 'Google owes $2.6bn in damages'

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Close but no banana

No, Google claims that removing the copyright notice from the top of a load of Java classes means the copyright no longer applies because the rest is 'just code'.

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