Feeds

* Posts by jai

2231 posts • joined 8 May 2007

... time machine. Iranian Dr Who claims he invented a ...

jai
Silver badge

Paycheck

Sounds like he did a Ben Affleck - built a time machine, then looked into the future, found that the future is a disaster as a result of the time machine itself, so then gave himself the tools to destroy the time machine, thereby saving humanity, but also giving himself a winning lottery ticket in the process.

that's the only logical explaination for why the news of the discovery so suddenly vanished, isn't it?

0
0

What'll we do tonight, Kieran? Same thing we do every night, Tintri....

jai
Silver badge

Re: Damn - beat me to it

Oh? I must confess, I meant the Animaniacs characters :)

0
0
jai
Silver badge

+1 for Pinky & The Brain reference! \o/ :)

6
0

Dinosaur embryos FOUND: Resurrection 'out of the question'* - boffin

jai
Silver badge

"resurrecting a dinosaur is out of the question"

Of course, that's exactly what they would say, while they're quietly buying up an island in the pacific and installing their top secret "research facility / safari park" before anyone notices...

4
0

Everything faster than everything, boast soft flash wizards

jai
Silver badge

"Everything faster than everything"

Wasn't that a song by MeatLoaf?

0
0

Bank card-slurp nasty 'infects tills, ATMs', corrupt staff fingered

jai
Silver badge

Re: Why no whitelist firewall

do you mean, interrogate the people who have physical and electronic access to the infrastructure? or to physically and electronically "interrogate" them :)

eitherway, I'm sure Dr Cal Lightman will be happy to assist

0
0

Mars to go offline for a month as vast nuclear furnace gets in the way

jai
Silver badge

Re: One month later...

+1 for "Ulla suckers!" lol

1
0

Google goes on the Blink in WebKit fork FURORE

jai
Silver badge

the obvious reason

it's obvious why they've done this - they want to make their own <blink><marquee>blinking marquee</marquee></blink> element

2
1
jai
Silver badge

Re: Opera too

yet!

the whole point of forking it is so that they can make changes to speak of. if they didn't need to do it, they wouldn't have a problem with using WebKit, would they.

0
1

Disney shutters Star Wars game unit with 200 layoffs

jai
Silver badge

these are not the games you're looking for

i was really looking forward to 1313 :(

1
0

Scottish SF master Iain M Banks reveals he has less than a year to live

jai
Silver badge

thoroughly depressed by this news. have loved his sci-fi books ever since i first read one as a young teenager. truely one of the greatest sci-fi writers ever in my opinion. and while i find his fiction books a bit hit and miss, they are always worth reading regardless.

very sorry that there will be no more Culture novels. i shall be re-reading them all in tribute to the great man.

0
0

Maybe don't install that groovy pirated Android keyboard

jai
Silver badge

Re: Android Heaven

that's a lot of "probably" that you've used there

you probably won't get hit by a car if you run across the motorway, but i'm not entirely happy with the idea of doing it myself

3
0

Goblinproofing One's Chicken Coop hailed oddest book title

jai
Silver badge

Re: The point of this is?

it's filed under the Business / Media section of the website.

Not under the Computer section. Not under the Tech section. Not under the Software section, nor even under the Hardware section. I'm confused by your confusion that you thought it was part of one or all of those sections of the site.

and as others have said, it's friday ffs, lighten up and get down the pub!

3
0

MasterCard stings PayPal with payment fee hike

jai
Silver badge

Re: Coming to a wallet near you...

But how would that work? you'd have to get the money from the users somehow, you wouldn't just give them infinite credit.

And if they're going to give the PayPal credit card access to their bank account details, then they can already give PayPal as it is access to their bank account so completely avoid any credit card processing charges anyway.

Also, a company can't just issue credit cards, can it? Aside from American Express, aren't all other credit cards linked to either Visa or to Mastercard in one way or another?

4
2

Oi, Microsoft, where's my effin' toolbar gone?

jai
Silver badge

Re: What is this OP's comment supposed to be?

Is it supposed to be funny? Is it being 'irreverent'? It's a load of old bollocks, for sure.

There, fixed it for you. You didn't really come to El Reg to read in depth technical discussions on the technology world, did you? Is this your first time here?

6
3

Tech distie Tech Data tears up last THREE years of profit numbers

jai
Silver badge

how come...

...no one ever makes these kinds of mistakes the other way round, do they?

You never hear about someone miscalculating and suddenly discovering they've made 21 million more than they thought.

is that just Murphy's Law in action? or skulduggery afoot because the bean counters were hoping the numbers would come right before they had to fess up to their error?

0
0
jai
Silver badge

they probably do, but assume it's the bank that's at fault and not themselves

0
0

Syrian hacktivists hijack BBC Weather feed

jai
Silver badge

so it's the Syrian's that are to blame for the snow coming down outside the window this morning? damn their eyes!!!

0
0

Hong Kong plans cavernous underground data centres

jai
Silver badge

Neil Stephenson

someone's been reading the Cryptonomicon from the sounds of it

0
0

Bottomless, unsatisfied Xbox widow cuffed after boyf flees nookie

jai
Silver badge

Re: Pix or it didn't happen.

here you go:

http://ts1.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4901817041161148&pid=1.7&w=190&h=145&c=7&rs=1

5
0

Samsung Galaxy S 4: A slim stripper with palms hovering over its body

jai
Silver badge

Re: Ooo matron

welcome to El Reg, you're new here are you?

3
0

Report says #Facebook #to #adopt #hashtags

jai
Silver badge

Re: Shift-3?

it's not a special character. it's just option-3 instead of shift-3

it's not windows having to type a whole series of numbers to get a Euro symbol

0
0

Trip the fight fantastic

jai
Silver badge

Re: Square Syndrome

an why can't i get her to do the probably-physically-impossible handstand move when pulling herself up a ledge anymore?

0
0

Ten serious sci-fi films for the sentient fan

jai
Silver badge

Here's another suggestion

Big ideas? Exploring the human condition?

Then may I suggest the original, Carradine, Death Race 2000

If that's not a commentary on the human condition, in a (then) futuristic setting then....

A shame they copped out with the remakes

1
0
jai
Silver badge
Headmaster

Re: No love for Dune?

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0287839/combined

you know it was also a mini-series recently:

Dune (2000):

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0142032/combined

Children of Dune (2003):

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0287839/combined

1
0
jai
Silver badge
Terminator

Re: Blade Runner

I sadly know almost by heart having seen BR more times than my wife cares to remember!

and soon, all those memories, will be gone, like tears

in

the

rain...

1
0
jai
Silver badge

Re: Good choice..

i'm a big sci-fi fan, but not a fan of horror

somehow, i only saw sci-fi in the trailers for Event Horizon and figured any film with Sam Neil has to be good right?

so completely came as a surprise when the horror begins in the movie.

still, damn good film, despite the lack of sleep i endured afterwards. wish i could bring myself to watch it again

1
0
jai
Silver badge

Thirteenth Floor is great. like all great sci-fi films, you should get to the end and go "oh? what?"

1
0
jai
Silver badge

I liked Chronicles because it didn't try to imitate Pitch Black. They're both very enjoyable in different ways, so neither detracts from the other, in my opinion.

1
0

Marvel: 'Come and get 'em! 700 first-issue comics! FREE!'

jai
Silver badge

Comixology

use the ComiXology app

the Marvel app is basically the ComiXology app, but only showing Marvel content. The DC app is the same, but with DC content. Get the original ComiXology app and you get all the content from both, with all the features.

and digital comics in these apps are great to read. switch on the guided view mode, it just shows one panel at once, and moves you from panel to panel when you tap. makes for an almost animated experience when reading, plus avoids accidentally reading ahead when there's a big panel on the right page that grabs your attention.

now, if i could just get the original Death's Head comics on there....

1
1

Six things a text editor must do - or it's a one-way trip to the trash

jai
Silver badge

Re: Stob - never one to let facts get in the way of a good rant...

how do you know that isn't the icon that offends her? perhaps she liked the old when she used to use it?

0
0
jai
Silver badge

Re: There is only one thing a text editor needs

i use a text editor as a tool, to make life easier. i could just concat all my code onto the end of a file, i guess, but using a text editor makes it easier to spot mistakes and type in lots of text.

having to type in the commands to control the app as well as type in the text i'm typing doesn't make life easier at all.

2
5
jai
Silver badge

the one thing a Monday morning needs...

...to make it bearable:

an article from Stob to get me through to the end of the day.

2
0

Bacon sarnies can kill: Official

jai
Silver badge

Re: Why is bacon "processed"?

the report states that even traditional curing methods produced the negative effects and so its included as processed meat. it seems that any effort to prolong the shelf life of meat has a negative effect on your when you eat it.

0
0

'Mainframe blowout' knackered millions of RBS, NatWest accounts

jai
Silver badge

Re: I doubt it

i was once told an anecdote. the major investment bank they worked for failed in it's overnight payment processing repeatedly, every night. Eventually they determined it was happening at exactly the same time each night. so they upgraded the ram/disks. patched the software. replaced the whole server. nothing helped.

Finally, head of IT decides enough is enough, takes a chair and a book to the data centre, sits in front of the server all night long to see what it's doing.

and at the time when the batch failed every night previously, the door to the server room opens, the janitor comes in with a hoover, looks for a spare power socket, finds none, so unplugs the nearest and plugs in the hoover. yes, you guessed it, plug that was unplugged was the power lead for the server in question.

just because you're a big firm, doesn't mean you don't get taken out by the simplest and stupidest of things

1
6
jai
Silver badge

to add some detail, if it's the same one, that would suggest that no one did any due diligence, or lessons learned, or root cause analysis or any of a dozen other service delivery buzzwords that all basically mean, "wtf happened and how do we make sure it doesn't happen again?"

you'll always get new issues that break things. such is the way of IT. no system is 100% perfect. you just have to put in as much monitoring/alerting and backup systems as you can afford to ensure any impact from outage to your business critical systems is as minimal as possible.

1
0

Pirate Bay to world: We're not really off to NORKS

jai
Silver badge

wtf?

NSWFW?

New South Wales For Work?

4
0

US lawmaker blames bicycle breath for global warming gas

jai
Silver badge

What about stairs?

I dunno about you, but sometimes I'm outa breath after using the stairs at work because it's "healthier"

But apparently I'm killing the planet .

For that matter they ought to tax people who can't leave their homes on time in the morning and so have to run down the road and over the train station bridges to catch their trains.

And that's not to mention the CO2 produced by people having sex.....

0
0

Sony: Can't beat Apple and Samsung, so let's be the Other Guy

jai
Silver badge

Or perhaps their own advertising for the PS3 - they're entering the Third Place....

2
1

BlackBerry Z10: Prices pruned despite eager iPunter interest

jai
Silver badge

Thing is, you'd expect the sales to have been much better from all those in "the BB way"

But that doesn't seem to be happening, so even the old BB devotees aren't flocking to the new device.

Perhaps they're all waiting for their current 2 year contracts to end, but can Blackberry really wait the, perhaps up to, 18 months for all their old customers to come back to them?

0
0

Apple 'insider' explains why vid adapter hides ARM computer

jai
Silver badge

Re: Are you kidding?

@OP - the point is that there is a single port on the iDevice, which is used for multiple functions, not just video out. one port, multiple adapters. not multiple ports, each with a separate adapter each.

you're obviously content to have a device with multiple ports, which you may or may not need. iDevices have a single port, which you at least need for charging and possibly for syncing. if you want to do anything else with it, then you buy an adapter, but not everyone needs video out. not everyone needs a GPIB interface. So the few that want a video out via cable have to pay a bit extra. the rest of us stream to our AppleTVs to get video on the telly, without having to pay even the $5 for the hdmi adapter you mention.

4
15

Mind-melded rats could herald organic BRAIN-COMPUTERS

jai
Silver badge

i know it's not what the experiment was, but when i saw the headline on the news this morning i assumed they'd just observed that when rat A thinks of cheese, so does rat B!

0
0

Stargazers spot first-ever planet forming in dusty disc

jai
Silver badge

boffins with brains the size of planets

and they can't come up with imaginative names for their telescopes.

Still, I guess there's no time to waste on daft names when there's planets being created. I mean, 10 years will go past in a flash! if they're not careful.

0
2

Apple CEO Cook's investor-meeting reveal: 'Dog bites man'

jai
Silver badge

Re: Bathroom?

Weird, it had never occurred to be that Bathroom wasn't a British word!

You learn something new everyday! And also, to everyone complaining about Apple stories on ElReg, this goes to prove they do have a use. Not only has this furthered by understanding of my own language, but also earlier contain a very useful discussion about depression and public message on caring for those so afflicted.

1
0

Super-fast super-massive black hole spins at nearly light-speed

jai
Silver badge
Alien

Re: Hmm

What prevents a black hole from spinning faster than light?

Matt Bellamy at the centre, shredding on his guitar

3
0

EyeSight tries to please MWC crowd with touch-free fingering

jai
Silver badge

can it tell the difference between different fingers?

i.e. can it tell the difference between when i'm using my index finger to scroll a webpage or move icons around, and when an app crashes and i flip my middle finger at the computer, will it be able to recognise that and issue a End Process command to the hanging app?

0
0

Ten smartphones with tablet ambitions...

jai
Silver badge

Take two devices into the shower?

No, I just take one HUGE one that's too big to fit into the shower anyway!

2
0

Brit firm PinPlus flogs another password 'n' PIN killer

jai
Silver badge

Re: Timeouts?

ATMs? really?

i know people who have their ATM pin written down inside their purse/wallet. how do you explain to them that each time they use it, the numbers of the code are going to be different?

and sure only the simplest of patterns are going to be used. anything remotely complex is still too hard for the average person to remember (can you recall without looking the patten used in the example?)

1
0

That Firefox OS mobe: The sorta phone left behind after a mugging

jai
Silver badge

Re: A somewhat harsh editorial...

I think the point was that, given that both iOS and Android have made progress and improvements since they were launched, it's strange to see FirefoxOS come out with so much progress and improvements yet to be made. Surely they've looked at a recent example from the competition and so should have made an effort to compete.

At least, that's how I read it.

2
0