Posts by Code Monkey
1456 posts • joined Thursday 16th October 2008 09:53 GMT
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Posted in Nude gardener's arse hauled into court
@Intractable Potsherd
Thank you. Every day's a school day
Posted in Nude gardener's arse hauled into court
Engorged hampton
I've no idea what an engorged hampton is and will just have to (try not to) imagine until I can get off the work network to Google it. Meanwhile, please send a fresh keyboard to my office forthwith.
Posted in Nude gardener's arse hauled into court
Or to turn it around...
I was naked in my hotel room and the maid walked in. Eventually.
Mine's the flasher's mack
Posted in Nude gardener's arse hauled into court
Guess the contents
Guess the contents of a story entitled "Nude gardener's arse hauled into court". Not that difficult, surely?
Roll up, roll up!
This is your chance to own next year's MySpace phone!
Posted in TalkTalk goes silent
"Lidl of telephony providers"
Can I be the 1057th commentard to complain it's grossly unfair to compare a fine supermarket to this shower of kronk.
So not the Turing test...
Maybe the Ballmer test?
A long, long time ago
Working at a reseller, we got sent some Danish-localised PCs. I told our marketing manager they were the new EU-approved Pan-European keyboards. Next thing I know our company newsletter has an article about them!
Dumb much?
Posted in Boffins herald end of stiff screens
Bendy iPhone
Imagine the thousands of ways you can hold this one wrong!
Posted in Boffins herald end of stiff screens
Calm down dear
Maybe the author was just using the iPhone as an e-x-am-ple (and one that scans better than "iPhone/Android/Windows phone/Blackberry/other").
Why I say that
It's true there are users who'll buy Apple no matter what and those that buy what works. I'd say they are the two extremes in this market. In between are the majority of folks who assume a tablet computer is called an "iPad", an MP3 player is called an "iPod" and assume other devices in those categories are knock-offs. Hence my saying they need to be better or cheaper than Apple (ideally both)
Posted in Amazon jumps on time-limited sales
This is the future of shopping isn't it?
Soon buying a pair of kecks will be as much of a pain in the balls as buying a train ticket.
I'm sure it's fun if you like shopping, chase bargains and whatever. Those of us that value our free time a little more are going to end up getting fleeced.
Interesting market
The success of the iPad had made this an interesting market. For the majority of *Pad buyers (Apple-phobes aside), Android offerings need iPad-like performance for less or cost signifiantly less to have a chance. Expect a lot more vague claims about performance and read the reviews carefully.
Me? I'm just glad I'm not an early adopter!
Apple survived because MORONS exist
It's an easy mistake to make.
Polarisation gratings
Good progress boffins. Now how do we stick a polarisation gratings to a shark?
Game to Fillum
The genre sucks huge ones but you've got to admire their persistennce.
"One day my boy we'll do a game adaptation that doesn't stink!"
Paris because she sucks big oh what's the use?
Posted in Government slashes consultancy spending
Not all cuts are bad
Here's a spending cut we can all support.
Whisper mode
I suspect most of my neighbours would chip in to buy local plod a quieter heilcopter. Then maybe we'd get some sleep
Not a time for cynicism...
Cynicism no. Sketicism always!
Location
Just what the fanbois would want. More location-based fun and games.
Barmy families
Compared to this lot, even the Fritzls look sane
I agree, but
"authorities should have free access to anything they want" is indeed the regime we now live under but these are anything but I'd not describe it as "liberal".
all
Not voting at all is effectively a vote for all.
Nitpickers unanimous
"Why indeed, when Walgreens is famous for its extensive of goods, from cosmetics and pharmacueticals to general hardware."
I think you something there.
No need to publish my nitpicking.
Posted in Five amazing computers for under £100
Stinkypad
Good call. I paid £200 for a T43 last October and it's been solid as a rock.
Posted in Animal lovers stamp on goldfish racing
They might be dicks
But that doesn't mean they're wrong.
Good luck fellas
I'm hugely envious of the generation that saw man land on the moon and would love to live to see the day our species sets foot on another planet.
Won't somebody think of the English Language!
Loving the pedantry on this thread!
(FWIW I'm with the "destroy a large proportion of..." crowd).
Posted in US Army to issue Droid dev kit in July
Or...
For those still working in Iraq, Angry Kurds
Mine's the one with... ah what's the use?
Fair play
Come on web developers. Who hasn't claimed a DDOS was at fault for that shonky code you knocked out at 4 o'clock on a sunny Friday?
Well maybe not so sunny in Scotland.
Father Ted and Dougal
Down with that sort of thing.
Prob just the horns would be enough
He doesn't have many fans on here (writers or we commentards). No need for a halo.
Wanker
In honour of Reg's April Fools story, could we have an iPhone iCon for wankers?
Posted in Doctor Who's Elisabeth Sladen dies at 63
Sad
This weekend I'll watch The Hand of Fear, raise a glass and probably shed a few tears. What a terrible shame.
DDOS?
Two people using the site at the same time more like. Awful thing that it is!
Posted in Wills and Kate to wed live on YouTube
Repulbicans
I'm a staunch Republican and still want the day off.
Horses for courses
I own a high-end compact that I'd never give up for a smartphone camera but the phone's more than adequate for snapping mates titting around in the pub.
Posted in Wills and Kate to wed live on YouTube
Re: Is there no escape
Yes. I'll be sitting in a beer garden with a load of other people who don't give a rat's arse about the latest round of the royal circus. It'll be lovely!
"it does nothing but offer up a worthless survey"
Not quite. It also shows you up as a bit too concerned how many followers you've got.
/utter_non_it_angle_rubbish_but_hey_the_readers_love_this_crap/
Splendid stuff!
Scheming
If she wants to scam some loaded inbreds good luck to her. Maybe hers will be the scandal to rid of these talentless bastards once and for all.
Demon
For another £3.60 a month you could go with Demon. You rarely need their support but when you do you tend to get someone who knows what they're talking about*
* or when I last called them, probably 4 years ago
It's not a superiority complex
DSG staff _are_ typically clueless and too keen to push rip-off warranties.
That your experience in another country is different is no huge surprise.
For Tesco, substitute Amazon
...and you have my gadget-buying down to a tee. IIRC the last thing I bought from Dixons was a portable cassette player
'"Remixing our culture" my arse'
This
Nah
Just because this tool has vomited a load of buzzwords all over his book cover does not mean we're past it. It just means it's another breathless technology fanboi book we can safely not bother reading.
@sT0rNG b4R3 duRiD
Appropriate that I've earned a keyboard upgrade this very lunchtime
Posted in Nissan Leaf electric car
In the future, yes
For now if you can't afford to run a petrol car you certainly can't afford a £20k+ for a small hatchback.
Posted in Amazon splatters ads to cut Kindle price
Reading email != reading books
Your answer doesn't give any indication that you read books. I don't say that to insult you, just wondering if your experiences of reading and mine are the same.
When I read a book for pleasure (or for work for that matter) I want to completely switch off from the outside world. That means no telly, no phone, no radio and certainly no adverts or user generated crap in *my* book.
Get this right Amazon. I'm tempted by the Kindle but will be easily put off.
