Feeds

* Posts by Code Monkey

1558 posts • joined 16 Oct 2008

Teens break up with Facebook

Code Monkey

Re: Bloat

Very , very true.

0
0
Code Monkey

Re: Twitter leaves you wide open

Don't say anything on Twitter that you wouldn't put on a huge billboard next to a photo of your face. Never forget it's very, very public and act accordingly.

0
0

Ten... Kitchen Gadget Treats

Code Monkey

Re: Engraved handle on a kitchen knife...

That knife is one of the two things on that list I'd consider making space for and I've no illusions about being a "proper" chef (let alone Heston, whose food is pretentious beyond belief IMO).

The other's the pasta maker.

3
1

Facebook to acquire Instagram for $1bn

Code Monkey

$1bn buys a lot of grainy cat photos, it seems.

2
0

Canon reaches for stars with DSLR refresh

Code Monkey
Headmaster

Re: on the rear you'll find a 3in LCD...

The Wales, as a unit of area, is not applicable. The screen should correctly be described as 0.5443 linguini.

0
0
Code Monkey

I see the pound's took another hammering against the Galactic Groat.

2
0

Top Italian OPERA boffin steps down after faster-than-light mistake

Code Monkey

I have little more than another "me too" to add to this. OPERA acted entirely correctly in this matter, demonstrating science working at its very best and fully deserve their applause. A crying shame if this is the only reason.

4
0

Osborne+ and Schmidt+ say 'the internet' = 8.3 per cent of UK GDP

Code Monkey
Coat

8.3

2012 and still no support for long file names? Pffft!

4
0

UK government says no to turbo e-bike

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Re: 15mph?

Yup. I grew up in Lancashire where even fat lads can exceed the speed limit down the right hill.

9
0

Wags unroll Twitter toilet paper

Code Monkey
Pint

Piers Morgan

As the article says, it's a bit pricey but my birthday's coming up so if anyone fancies buying me a four pack of Piers Morgan I'd be very grateful :o)

1
0

Behold! Or rather, don't: Bendy see-through DRAM

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

I like the idea of music collection-themed garments. Anyone fancy a Grateful Dead discography kaftan or a Sunn O))) discography monk's habit? Just try not to think of the Iggy Pop discography transparent kecks.

1
0

Amazon names date for Kindle Touch touchdown

Code Monkey
Headmaster

Re: Who's Jeff ?

Jeff Bezos - Grand Poobah of Amazonia

0
0

Baffling barcode-on-steroids stickers plaster the EARTH

Code Monkey
Pint

Re: Bring e'm on!

My preferred defence against QR-based attacks is not to bother with them. From never having seen anyone else use them it seems that's standard.

+1 for beer!

0
0

Half of Apple fanbois would bank with the iPad titan

Code Monkey
Coat

Inevtiable rounded corners comment

Move into banking, sue all other banks because their debit and credit cards have rounded corners.

On me way already...

7
0

The Facebook job test: Now interviewers want your logins

Code Monkey

In that case you don't end up working for micro-managing dicks. A lucky escape.

16
0

Eight... AirPlay speakers

Code Monkey

Anyone else think the second one looks like a toaster?

0
0

New NASA snap of game developer's electric cart FOUND ON MOON

Code Monkey

Jawas appear to strip it for parts in 3... 2... 1...

2
0

Take your hands off me - I'm a tech VC superstar!

Code Monkey
Joke

Well weapon!

Maybe some readers would've found the JOKE ALERT icon helpful.

3
0

iPhone/PS3 hacker Hotz arrested in pot bust

Code Monkey
Windows

Re: $800 for 3/8ths of an ounce?

Jeebus! Things have certainly changed since I was into that sort of thing.

0
0

Canon PowerShot S100 GPS compact camera

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

A DSLR-toting chum has an S95 (possibly S90) and gets superb results.

Being a "posh compact" kind of photographer (i.e. I like the odd arty shot but am too lazy to lug a DSLR around) I'm very tempted to upgrade.

0
0

Mobile phones cause ADHD in rodents

Code Monkey
Coat

Obligatory Dom Joly Comment

I'M IN A LAB! A LAB!

NO IT'S RUBBISH!

1
0

UPDATE: GAGA team hunts down grass-smoking ROBOT

Code Monkey
Pint

SPB Banner

I've just noticed the funky mouseover thing on your SPB banner. Very nice.

(For fellow commentards, it seems to need Chrome.)

Beer, naturally.

3
0

Comet and Walmart battle for Game

Code Monkey

Re: Comet?

That was my first thought. Surely they've enough lossmaking retail space as it is...

2
0

Smartphone owners demand bigger screens

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Re: Back to the 90s

Agredd. I still miss my Moto V66.

I'm pondering looking at the smaller 'droids come upgrade time.

0
0

American pies are cooling on the windowsill ahead of Pi Day

Code Monkey

Re: I am disappointed

One that extends through time? Like one that you* shove in the fridge for later?

* other people. Pies don't last long in this house.

0
0

LOHAN's fantastical flying truss takes to the air

Code Monkey

Launch gubbins

With LOHAN under the truss, some (longish) rails under each wing should hold her securely through the buffetting of the ascent, but provide little resistance when the rocket kicks in.

0
0

Speedy 3D printer creates 285µm Formula-1 speedster

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Wow

So is it tiny to make the process quicker (or cheaper) or just to show off?

I'm impressed either way and looking forward to when they embiggen it.

0
0

Human 4G masts assemble roaming hobonet for pennies

Code Monkey
Thumb Down

Crass

5
0

Anonymous takes down Vatican website

Code Monkey
FAIL

Re: Never when it is used

It's not libel or slander. There are Catholic priests doing time for unlawful sex with minors the world over.

They should put their own house in order before telling people who they can and can't marry.

9
2

Tevatron refines Higgs boson picture

Code Monkey

Re: yeah, but so what

Discoveries of this nature ALWAYS yield new technologies - we just don't know what they are, yet. The fun part will be finding out.

0
0

Sun belches wonking solar flare

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Re: I just hope we get some clear skies

Thank you Micheal!

Daily Mail readers (and that BBC Horizon prog about it): ZOMG we're all going to die!

Reg readers: aurora time if we're lucky (though in my case it'd have to be a doozy of a storm to produce an aurora visible in the Midlands).

1
1

Carmageddon

Code Monkey

Possibly my favourite game of all time. Pure moronic joy! I never managed to complete Beef Curtains though.

The Playstation port was excellent as well.

0
0

X-com reboot's gameplay showcased

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

I loved the original. This actually looks rather good. Maybe time to get the thumbs out of retirement.

1
0

Why on Earth would you build a closed Android phone?

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

There are plenty of basic phones available for under £20 (if you shop around you can find them with a tenner of calls pre-paid). Being just calls and tect devices, you won't see any in these esteemed pages but they're prefect for me mam who doesn't want a smartphone.

With a battery life measured in days I'm tempted to "upgrade" myself.

3
1

Eric Schmidt flicks INTERSTELLAR TOWEL at top tech fair

Code Monkey
Trollface

Re: Still waiting...

There are already plenty of fish you can stick in your ear*

* admittedly none of the available fish can translate what your inebriated Geordie friend says and he'll be even less intelligible when you've got a sardine jammed in your lughole. :o)

5
0

Dev spits out new spin of 'Protesters' Twitter'

Code Monkey

Re: The confused protester

To me that suggests that it's not just your traditional protesters (to stereotype: your dog-on-a-ropers) that think that what big business and this goverment are up to is vile.

1
0

Lego space shuttle hits 114,000ft

Code Monkey

Agreed

A total cop out (or kopp out in deference to the German legospacemeisters?)

0
0

Ford: kick your car to open the boot

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Lots of potential downsides for Ford to guard against, as my astute fellow commentards have listed above but it does strike me as a very pleasing gesture.

0
0

LOHAN is heading towards REHAB

Code Monkey
Pint

LOHAN to REHAB

Oh you guys!

0
0

No 10 develops Terminator iPad app 'to fire ministers'

Code Monkey

Cut spending FAIL

Cut national debt FAIL

Reduce unemployment FAIL

Economic recovery FAIL

Greater civil liberties FAIL

Sack yourself, Dave

2
1

Audi shows off OLED-illuminated concept R8

Code Monkey

Vorsprung Durch Arsehole

You really don't need fancy lights to telegraph you're a complete tool. The Audi badge does that well enough already.

2
2

Lithuania rules beer brewing 'vitally essential' to life

Code Monkey

Re: Unitie?

The difference being Unite won't be trying to "bomb some sense" into Carlsberg.

0
0
Code Monkey

Re: "Have you ever actually been there?"

Yes. From memory both the local water and local beer were excellent.

2
0

Oz says 41 hits a day turn bloggers into publishers

Code Monkey

Re: What's a pageview?

Tis true. I contribute to a blog and reckon at least half my stories' hits are me, concerned that I've made another typo.

2
0

Asteroid could SMASH INTO EARTH in 2040

Code Monkey
Pint

"over the course of millions of light years"

What's that in linguini?

Beer, well, because.

1
0
Code Monkey

Re: The most important thing...

We can send Bieber up there. It won't change the course of the KILLER SPACEROCK but it'll be a definite improvement.

14
0

Hackers print tiny Linux box to net up your home

Code Monkey
Trollface

Both board and box have rounded corners. Are Apple's lawyers aware of this?

7
0

El Reg appoints Special Projects Burro

Code Monkey

Duties? No lo sé.

Just keep Aladdin away from any church towers.

0
0

Cray gets graphic with big data

Code Monkey

Urika-ka-ka-kaaaa. That is all.

0
0

Brits guard Facebook passwords more than work logins – survey

Code Monkey

Trusting your colleagues

That sounds about right to me. I'd trust my colleagues with my work stuff, but never ever with anything personal.

3
0