* Posts by Code Monkey

1572 posts • joined 16 Oct 2008

404 Boss not found — Bye bye ICANN CEO Chehade

Code Monkey
Gimp

404?

302 moved permanently, Shirley?

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ZX Spectrum 'Hobbit' revival sparks developer dispute

Code Monkey
Windows

Re: Mondegreen

Rule 34 says you probably can see it.

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Are we looking at the first domain name meme? Neigh

Code Monkey

Down with this sort of thing

It's Eurovision week* so it's a shame mylovely.horse is just a holding page.

* in some households, not mine

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You say you want a musical revolution. Actually, have three

Code Monkey

Re: I think hip-hop saved the charts

Grunge was nothing revolutionary; just another flavour of rock music.

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Debian ships new 'Jessie' release with systemd AND sysvinit

Code Monkey

The "self-censorship" (and liberal use of NSFW in other articles) is a courtesy to those employees of corporations with a puritanical view of appropriate reading.

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JUNK in your TRUNK is Amazon Germany's new delivery plan

Code Monkey

Re: Insurance

This is less of an insurance hazard than giving the keys to a garage for an MOT or repairs. Whether the insurance companies agree - or, as some commenters suggest, spy an excuse to put a zero on the end of my premiums - is another matter.

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Fed-up Colorado man takes 9mm PISTOL to vexing Dell PC

Code Monkey
Windows

He was a homeopathy fan. Maybe his herbal tea had seen a picture of some methamphetamine.

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Ubuntu 15.04 to bring 'Vivid' updates for cloud, devices this week

Code Monkey
Devil

"Vivid Vervet"

Will the next version rhyme with "Lanky Walrus"?

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Mortal Kombat: Brawler gaming's quintessential gorefest

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

I liked Jonnhy Cage's do-the-splits-gonad-punch the best.

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Tortilla de patatas

Code Monkey
Happy

I side with the purists here or at least the (possibly slightly pongy) pro-onion camp. Tortilla de patatas is a supremely tasty example of less is more.

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Philip Glass tells all and Lovelace and Babbage get the comic novel treatment

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Re: Stick with Four Lions

It's big flaw was not being quite as funny as Chris Morris's tv work - a standard which leaves plenty of room to still be funny. I laughed most of the way through and the ending was superb. Well worth a revisit from me as well.

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The Internet of things is great until it blows up your house

Code Monkey
Windows

Re: Um...

That 1-6 setting sounds ominously toaster-like.

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Aged 18-24? Don't care about voting? Got a phone? Oh dear...

Code Monkey

There are any number of fun ways to spoil your ballot, which is most likely what I'll be doing. Every time I vote for someone who gets in to Government they make me regret it by rubber stamping a neo-Con attack on the poor, disabled, etc.; or lying to the nation so they can kill thousands of Iraqis.

People are still dying to get the vote so I feel obliged to use it, but I don't feel obliged to use it on any of the current shower.

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Trying to sell your house? It'd better have KILLER mobile coverage

Code Monkey
Windows

"It remains to be seen if estate agents will lie about mobile coverage details on their property pitches."

Fixed that for you.

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METRE-LONG DINOSAUR POO going under the hammer

Code Monkey

It's nuggets (no pun intended) like this that keep me coming back to this site.

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Code Monkey

Re: Never mind the quality and length

From the picture the girth of the dinocronk is unimpressive. I doubt it's even a third of a lingiune.

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NASA: ALIENS and NEW EARTHS will be ours inside 20 years

Code Monkey
Trollface

Re: Promises, promises

It will also be the year of Linux on the desktop. What a year that'll be!

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Canuck reader threatens suicide over exact dimensions of SPAAAACE!

Code Monkey
Headmaster

There is one "a" in space. There are many in "spaaaace"

This means "spaaaace", "spaaaaace", etc. are valid.

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Quick Q: How many FLOPPIES do I need for 16 MILLION image files?

Code Monkey
Windows

Service Pack 3

A salesman once asked me for Service Pack 3 for NT4 on floppy. I printed off some labels, stuck them on 56 spare floppy disks and dumped the lot on his desk.

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Improbable: YOU gave model Lily Cole £200k for her Impossible.com whimsy-site

Code Monkey

I wish ...

I wish UK govt had spent this money on nurses or something.

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O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay! Friday is Pi Day

Code Monkey
Windows

Re: Like so many other web stories, this only applies to America.

In America Pi is 14.3 ... IIRC ours is different because of the metric system.

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Netflix needling you? BBC pimps up iPlayer ahead of BBC3 move

Code Monkey

Re: Yay for iPlayer!

I like the old version, but breaking up the Factual monolith can only be a good thing (for me at least)

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Microsoft to push out penultimate XP patch on March Patch Tuesday

Code Monkey

You can take Windows XP from my cold, dead, smeared over the dashboard hands.

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Distro diaspora: Four flavours of Ubuntu unpacked

Code Monkey

Re: Gubuntu

I imagine RMS would've had strong words if they'd chosen Gnubuntu

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Ever get the impression a telesales op was being held prisoner?

Code Monkey

It's a great way of getting the "work doesn't pay" message across

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Insecure hipsters with BEARD ENVY spur facial hair transplant craze

Code Monkey
Windows

Re: I can't keep up

I was shaving my ass like baboons before it was cool.

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Booze and bacon sarnies: A recipe for immortality?

Code Monkey

Re: Nobel prize incoming

Bacon is a superfood, but let's keep it quiet. As soon as the Graun set get hold of this, prices will rocket.

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NHS England tells MPs: 'The state isn't doing dastardly things with GP medical records'

Code Monkey
Thumb Down

Re: What do you want from the NHS

This is not about mistrusting the healthcare professionals. It's mistrusting the management wonks - either now or in a few governments' time who will flog this off to the highest bidder.

Sooner or later they will fuck the nation over massively with this. They will.

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Code Monkey
Big Brother

Re: "Start the slurping and we'll do the "code of conduct" later."

And this is exactly why I've opted out. Not that I'd trust these bastarts with a code of practice either.

[dons tinfoil hat]

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Micro Men: The story of the syntax era

Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Ha! Splendid!

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Code Monkey

My career, mediocre as it is, is another that began in the 80s with a Spectrum. As such I never knew Sir Clive but his protrayal seemed a wee bit OTT.

Granted our industry is filled with ... highly-strung people but OTT all the same.

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China's censors censor press censorship report

Code Monkey
Headmaster

"Australia fared best in 28th"

I would suggest that 27 countries fared better.

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Google Glassholes, GET OFF our ROADS, thunder lawmakers in seven US states

Code Monkey

Re: So does this ban smart-watches?

Whether we need a law or not, we'll probably get one. Blair started banning things that were already banned and the current lot continue to do so.

Somehting to do with being seen to do someting.

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Volunteers slam plans to turn Bletchley Park into 'geeky Disneyland'

Code Monkey
Devil

I look forward to them telling the story of how the Americans cracked the Enigma code.

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Do you wear specs? Google Glass offers YOU amazing live HD video

Code Monkey

Re: De gustibus…

They make you look like a great, shining bell.

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Candy Crush dev stuffs EU 'candy' trademark down gob

Code Monkey
Windows

One side-effect is we'll have to go back to calling them "sweets".

I approve.

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Naked Aussie gets wedged in washing machine

Code Monkey

Worthy of the Northern Territory News. Colleague from Darwin is delighted to hear of more southerly Aussies being so dumb.

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Excise Xmas prezzie indecision MISERY with El Reg’s gift guide²

Code Monkey
Trollface

Re: washable keyboard?

I can think of quite a few people who could use a washable keyboard.

Stop sniggering at the back!

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OMG, Andrex KILLED the PUPPY! Not quilty, exclaim bog roll boys

Code Monkey

Re: Online toilet paper lovers?

Anything that doesn't feel like tracing paper/sandpaper and your finger doesn't go through will do for me.

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If you want an IT job you'll need more than a degree, say top techies

Code Monkey
Unhappy

Re: The first hurdle....

Indeed. I'm in my 40s and halfway through a degree now - despite having worked on the internet since the 90s.

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What is thy bidding? Han Solo’s shooter goes under the hammer

Code Monkey

Re: Excellent timing

"What this old thing? Just £5 on Well Known Auction Site (tm)"

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Super-stealth FLYING CAR prototype seen outside GOOGLE HQ

Code Monkey
Terminator

So having provided a cyberpunk dystopia, Google are moving on to more optimistic sci-fi.

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The ULTIMATE cuppa showdown: And the winner is...

Code Monkey

Re: Taking the tea,

12 mugs of tea sounds reasonable to me. If I spent, say a Saturday at home I'll easily get through 7 or 8 pints mugs of tea before "caffeine lasites" (sometimes aka pub o'clock).

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Code Monkey

Re: Earl Grey - VOTE NOW

A qualified +1 there - for mug size only.

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Code Monkey
Thumb Up

Clipper was my tea of choice till I overcame my "cultural" aversion to Yorkshire Tea about 18 months ago.

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Code Monkey

As long as you avoid the cheaper supermarket varieties I reckon how you make a cuppa has more bearing than the choice of tea. Though FWIW my vote's for Yorkshire Tea.

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Vladimir PUTIN officially HARDER than CHUCK NORRIS

Code Monkey
Windows

@Ledswinger "Friday afternoon journalism" - was Re: Wrong Art - Chuck's 9th Dan too.

I'm all for Friday afternoon journalism. In fact I'd like it all week long.

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Code Monkey

So ... is this just some honourary title cos he's the President, or something genuine like Kim Jung Il's golf prowess?

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ULTIMATE ELECTRIC driving machine? Yes, it’s the BMW i3 e-car

Code Monkey

I realise that being "seen to be green" is kinda the point for a lot of people but I wish manufacturers would make them look like normal cars.

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Latest global menace: ELECTROPULSE NORKS, apparently

Code Monkey
Unhappy

Re: In this country we use privatised electricity companies

I don't mind the odd outage as electricity's so cheap ... oh.

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