* Posts by Morrie Wyatt

74 posts • joined 14 Oct 2008

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You've been Drudged! Malware-squirting ads appear on websites with 100+ million visitors

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Down

Safety induction sites anyone?

They, even more than advertising, are one of the banes of my existence.

They require flash, java, and a variety of other plugins such as ActiveX and every other malware magnet de-jour, just so you can answer normally blatantly obvious multi-guess questions to qualify online for access to a building site.

Particularly with our good old Australian ADSL internet access, that streams the associated videos at 0.5 bits per millennium.

All for the purposes of safety of course.

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Are smart safes secure? Not after we've USB'd them, say infosec bods

Morrie Wyatt

Is it just me?

Or is anyone else reminded of the Thunderbirds episode "Vault of Death"?

"Nosey" Parker breaking into the electronic Vault at the Bank of England with just a hairpin.

That electronically controlled vaults was a bad idea is something they worked out in 1965!

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Ant-Man: Big ideas, small payoff

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Pseudo scientific sense.

"When small, they are of course much denser and that means that, y'know, when you are a person, you still have all your man-sized strength but in a much smaller space which means ... more strength ...?"

Matter with the space removed is the basic secret behind the gravity of a black hole after all.

And I'm old enough to remember analogue mechanical wrist watches, where tapping on the crystal is a bad move, because the force would be applied through the tip of the balance wheel pivots and could smash the little ruby bearings due to the concentration of force from a wide area (the balance wheel) onto a pivot only a few thou wide.

So greater strength?

I suppose, given the suspension from a NASA Saturn V Mobile Launcher Platform to support the weight of my disbelief that there could just be the barest shade of support for the premise.

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Goodbye Vulcan: Blighty's nuclear bomber retires for the last time

Morrie Wyatt

I can only hope

That someone can film one of these final flights with special attention paid to audio quality.

There are many clips on youtube that lose out due to all of the wind noise recorded because the mic was unprotected.

I really want that howl stored in highest possible quality for future generations to experience.

Unfortunately, living in Australia I am unlikely to be able to ever hear it first hand.

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Hey Google, what’s trending? Oh, just the death of journalism

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

What a straight line!

<Fireproof Suit>

You know you set yourself up for this.

"The Register can confirm that it was not contacted."

Because Google only contacted Journalists.

</Fireproof Suit>

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Australia's data retention regime starts October 13th says A-G

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

What part of AU$131M?

The minimum figure would be AU$131M of course.

Add all running and compliance costs as a 100% tax deduction.

The only way the government should expect this retention scheme to operate is a cost to the government, not to the ISP.

Let the costs be deducted from the politicians pay packets. See how quickly they would vote that through the upper and lower houses!

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Glass door to the ancient past FOUND ON MARS

Morrie Wyatt
Holmes

Cluedo

So, it was Mustard on Mars with the Meteor what dun it!

(Icon seems the obvious one here.)

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Virgin Media wins ELEVENTH patent case against Rovi

Morrie Wyatt

Next step

Ask the court to declare them as a vexatious litigant

After that, they need to apply for court permission before throwing sue balls.

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Rand Paul stages Senate filibuster against Patriot Act

Morrie Wyatt
Big Brother

Re: Did he actually filibuster it?

In the context of Rand Paul's usage, it is a way of running down the clock.

Those that hold the majority within the senate are allegedly in favour of the bill going through, so the only way to prevent it is to stop it from reaching the vote.

The bill can't be voted upon while senate discussion is ongoing.

As I understand it, the rules explicitly permit a speaker to have their entire point of view heard, no matter how long it takes.

So as the parliamentary session is of limited duration, if Rand Paul is able to tie up all of the remaining available time, the senate will not get to put the bill to the vote during this session.

With provisions within the Patriot Act about to expire, if the vote is not taken, the expiry will drop them from the act, requiring another run through the parliament to get them re-instated.

Lather, rinse, repeat for long enough, and the Patriot Act can be de-fanged to some degree, with no further additions for an indefinite period.

(All usual disclaimers apply. IANAL, don't play one on TV, not a politician etc.)

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NASA to take MARTIAN FLYING SAUCER for a spin

Morrie Wyatt
WTF?

What's happening?

Since when was an "Olympic sized swimming pool" a valid Register unit of measure?

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By Odin, Parallels thinks cloud service providers should buy Odin

Morrie Wyatt
Facepalm

Samsung won't be happy.

As ODIN is the name of the tool to flash new firmware to their mobile phones.

Do these marketing wallys ever bother to see if the name they want to rebrand themselves with is already in common use elsewhere?

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Ouch! Google crocks capacitors and deviates DRAM to root Linux

Morrie Wyatt

It's not the fault of Linux

To be fair, this is an exploit of the underlying hardware, not a flaw in linux itself.

After all, you can slow down a hard disk disk I/O by yelling at it. (the accoustic vibration affects the read heads positioning, multiplying latency.) This is just another case of rattling the hardware until somthing breaks.

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GSMA: Er, sorry about that MWC brothel ad with our logo

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Up

So the advertising worked?

Clean up the "mass act of congress"

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Japan's death threat hacker collared ... BY A CAT

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

He knows he's in trouble.

Being caught with his hands on the kitty, the result is likely to be catastrophic.

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Forget robo-butlers – ROBO-MAIDS! New hotel staffed by slave-droids

Morrie Wyatt

Old idea.

Stainless Steel Rat.

Harry Harrison's Slippery Jim DeGriz was tampering with such establishments decades ago.

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PEAK WINDOWS 7 may well be behind us

Morrie Wyatt

Or perhaps

It could also be because microsoft are making it harder to purchase Windows 7.

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El Reg Redesign - leave your comment here.

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Down

I'll admit to wondering

Where in hell the PFY has got to with that roll of carpet and bag of quicklime?

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Fake antivirus scams: It's a $120m business – and alleged ringleaders have just been frozen

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

Or maybe?

Couldn't we just defenestrate* the lot of them?

That would get them out of Windows.

(* From the thirteenth floor at minimum for luck, or from orbit just to be sure.)

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Heyyy! NICE e-bracelet you've got there ... SHAME if someone were to SUBPOENA it

Morrie Wyatt

Is it only me?

That sees "Healthkit" and reads Heathkit?

Or am I just showing my age.

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Munich considers dumping Linux for ... GULP ... Windows!

Morrie Wyatt

Re: Your phone works on electricity

Sorry, still wrong.

I mean opening the raw source of the message as a single unit, headers, attachments, the lot exactly as it was received and prior to any unpacking of the message contents.

Your suggestion will show the html source for the body of the message, but will not show the headers.

You can also see the headers if you wish, but the body will not be included in that view.

There seems to be no way to view the entire raw message source, headers and all in a single view.

In Thunderbird for instance, "Ctrl-U" will show the view I want to see.

(I'm talking about Outlook 2010 as the version which can't quote html contextually.)

And just to add to the fun of winmail.dat, the old (now defunct) Outlook Express would go one step further and decide that as it is not the full-blown version of Outlook, the winmail.dat attachment should be completely ignored, and no hint of it's existence is given (until you look at the raw source of the message of course, which was something tha Outlook Express _would_ do) so people would reply to the sender, stating that there was no attachment received.

Older versions of Outlook used IE as the rendering engine for html messages. 2007 used Word itself but by Outlook 2010 the rendering engine is taken from Word instead which often makes a dogs breakfast of that job too, unless the mail came from another Outlook user where it was written using the same dodgy html that Word generates.

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Morrie Wyatt

Re: An amazing piece of work?

You will note the first line of my statement was "In html mode"

I was being quite specific on that point.

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Morrie Wyatt

An amazing piece of work?

In html mode, please show me an example of contextual quoting.

Because Outlook uses the core editor from Word, it won't allow you to quote contextually, as it refuses to allow you to break up the quoted material into blocks for Question/Answer, Q/A, Q/A...

Even if you do use the necessary keystrokes to break the quoted material, when you re-open the reply thus generated, the quoted material will all be merged once again.

Outlook can turn a single line email into several kb of html cruft with every line of text having it's own font and style settings (even when they are identical to all of the previous lines).

Then there's the boondoggle that is MS-TNEF formatted RTF mode that merges everything into a file called winmail.dat, which can of course only be opened natively by Outlook. Plugins exist for various other clients, but is yet another example of how Microsoft try to Embrace, Extend, Extinguish existing standards such as MIME encoding which were already designed with this use in mind.

One of the most common things I do when receiving a message that looks a bit suspicious is to open is in raw text mode so that I can properly inspect the content and headers. Guess what? Outlook won't let you look at the raw incoming message!

What's amazing is how after all these years, Outlook still can't get such simple things right.

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Take the shame: Microsofties ADMIT to playing Internet Explorer name-change game

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

Re: Condition

Rarely an issue?

Try Honeywell's security camera recorder web interface. It requires Java AND ActiveX.

The worst of both worlds, it requires IE, and makes no guarantees about running on any recent version of that.

Internet Explorer rename?

A sows ear by any other name will still never be a silk purse, and will still smell just as bad.

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Help Australia's PM and attorney-general to define metadata

Morrie Wyatt

Bad poll

There's no "None of the above." option in any of the questions!

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Turnbull says NBN 'most reckless commitment of Commonwealth funds in our history'

Morrie Wyatt

Johnny Hart had it right.

From the comic strip BC.

Wiley's Dictionary.

Politics: A many handed game in which mudballs are trumps.

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Facebook: Want to stay in touch? Then it's Messenger or NOTHING

Morrie Wyatt

Meh.

Farcebook. Who needs it!

The sheer amount of time people waste on it each day is staggering.

Don't have an account, don't want an account, don't need Farcebook.

Too easy.

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True fact: Your CAT wees ... like a racehorse

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

To call this research

Is definitely taking the piss.

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LOHAN in FIGHT to DEATH with brace of cantankerous canards

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Alternate control method.

From the "makes sense to me" school of engineering, I would probably have opted to use the pivot purely as a pivot point, and moved the control horn forward of backward along the canard through a suitably sized slot in the body. Drive the system via an L shaped link to convert the horizontal movement of the servo control movement to a vertical movement of the control arm of the canard protruding through the slot. This would take the control torque away from the threaded rod of the pivot.

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Apple wheels out sueball cannon, again

Morrie Wyatt
Unhappy

What I'd love to see

I'd love to see Judge Koh reply "Denied! Award halved for being greedy and vexatious."

then add "Want to try for double or nothing, or will you stop wasting the court's time?"

When will the judiciary finally slap down these stupid patent squabbles?

Sigh!

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Microsoft blinks, extends Windows 8.1 Update deadline for consumers

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

And what of unsold stock?

With all of the unloved stock sitting on shop shelves around the world, I can just see the poor rube that purchases one only to find that they can't apply any security patches.

Or will Microsoft send someone to each of these shops to perform the update so as not to leavh customers stranded? HA!

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UN to debate killer drone ethics

Morrie Wyatt
Mushroom

Survive bureaucracy and a committee? Maybe.

If you could get the entire commitee gathered together in one place, a LAWS drone could do the job just fine.

The icon should be self explanatory, though the black helicopter should precede it of course.

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Red Hat to ship RHEL 7 release candidate with a taste of container tech

Morrie Wyatt
Linux

Re: Centos?

Even given that Centos now receives active support from Redhat, I still doubt that Centos can remove all of the trademark branding from RHEL 7 without a considerable level of due care.

So I suspect that months is the more likely answer, though probably fewer of them than the likes of Scientific Linux et al.

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US taxman blows Win XP deadline, must now spend millions on custom support

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

Can you envisage the following conversation?

(IRS) Microsoft support?

(MS) Yes, how can I help you?

(IRS) We seem to be having issues with some of our computers running Windows XP.

(MS) Sorry, XP has reached end of life and is no longer supported except where extra support fees are to be paid.

(IRS) Sorry, I missed that because the the boss was just asking about scheduling Microsoft and its staff for a tax audit. Could you repeat what you just said?

(MS) Of course. I was asking for a full description of the problem you are experiencing so I can get our staff onto the problem..

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Come to Oz for sun, surf, ratting on co-workers and surveillance

Morrie Wyatt
Stop

To quote Benjamin Franklin

"They who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

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Internet is a TOOL OF SATAN that destroys belief, study claims

Morrie Wyatt
Devil

Re: So to be safe

I was thinking more in the realms of the Babel fish entry in the guide.

1. God refuses to prove that (S)He exists, because proof denies faith, and without faith God is nothing.

2. Man then counters that the Babel fish is a dead giveaway because it could not have evolved by chance. So the fish proves that God exists, therefore (S)He doesn't. Q.E.D.

3. God says that (S)He hadn't thought of that, and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.

"Oh that was easy" says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white, and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing."

(Or words to that effect anyway.)

So in many ways, the Internet is the equivalent to the Babel fish.

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Morrie Wyatt
Joke

So to be safe

We should steer clear of zebra crossings.

(Or so Douglas Adams tells us.)

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Brussels' antitrust boss not budging on planned Google competition deal

Morrie Wyatt
Big Brother

Do we assume?

The settlement also obligates the competing search engines to clearly show Google search entries in their results?

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VMware drops vSphere 5.5 Update 1 into sysadmins' laps

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

Requires Adobe Flash?

Mega Fail!

A management tool that requires a continuing source of security embarrasment (flash) on top of a browser, (another cause of security headaches) on top of Windows.

Collect the whole set!

(Not that Java would be a better option.)

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Windows 8.1 Update 1 spewed online a MONTH early – by Microsoft

Morrie Wyatt
Joke

Release date?

Let me guess. The official release date would have to be April 1st, wouldn't it?

After all, Windows 8 can be best described as a bad joke, and suggesting that a point release will fix it would have to warrant an exclamation of "April Fool!"

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Australian bureaucrats to journalist: 'Give us back our bits'

Morrie Wyatt
Joke

Too easy

Returning the data?

Everyone should know the answer to this one.

Just reverse the polarity.

(After all, it always works in the movies!)

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UK citizens to Microsoft: Oi. We WANT ODF as our doc standard

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Up

Re: Very long term

"Microsoft's format is published and freely available."

Except that the OOXML "Standard" <cough> is replete with instances of backward compatibility features (often optional of course <cough><splutter>) that are described along the lines of "Treat version X feature the same way that versoin X does." but with no details on exactly how the proprietary format version X actually performed said function. The documentation for version X being proprietary and not available.

It leaves Microsoft as the only ones that could possibly implement the OOXML standard in full, while they point at their competition on performance issues over exactly such ill defined behaviour.

Even then, Microsoft railroaded OOXML through as an IEEE standard by stacking the ballot by having Microsoft business partners join IEEE, purely for the purpose of filling seats at meetings and in doing so, ensuring that objectors were not able to attend these meetings in enough numbers to make a difference.

Despite that, several modifications to the original OOXML standard as proposed by Microsoft were pushed into the final OOXML standard that made Mocrosoft Office only partially compliant to their own standard. Microsoft however were uninterested in making changes to Office so that it does comply.

In other words, it is a standard that even Microsoft don't comply with.

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Magnets to stick stuff to tablets: Yup, there's an Apple patent application for that

Morrie Wyatt
Stop

Super Saiyan Vegeeta

I have a toy my kids left behind when they grew up and moved out. One of them now with an 8 year old kid of his own.

It comprises of a base upon which the model Vegeeta stands, the feet being held by magnets in the base. The magnets and metal slugs in the models feet, are used to provide power to a yellow LED in the head of the model. When you push the button on the base, the electronics within the base make the appropriate noises, and power up the LED in the model in harmony with the sound effects.

Magnets to hold the two electronic units together in correct alignment? - Check!

The magnets allow the two electronic units interact? - Check!

Year of manufacture 2002.

I'd claim that as over 11 years of prior art, not to mention patently obvious.

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Forget unified communications, we want universal comms, Microsoft insists

Morrie Wyatt

Universal comms

And of course this means that all of the protocols are open, fully documented, royalty free, and have no patent restrictions, proprietary dependancies, or other legal entanglements. <cough!>

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NBN to be built even if cost-benefit analysis shows no ROI

Morrie Wyatt
Holmes

Cost-benefit analysis

I wonder if there has been / should be a cost-benefit analysis done on a politicians wages.

It would probably make the NBN look like a steal by comparison.

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Apple and Samsung STILL in bitchfight over banning ancient mobes

Morrie Wyatt
Stop

Wishful thinking.

If only for once the judge would decide that enough is enough, and hand down a judgement that the patents involved in the case from both warring parties are now null and void.

Then rip, shred and burn the patents, bury the ashes and salt the earth where they lie, with some silver nitrate for good measure, just to ensure that they never rise from the grave.

The judgement should also include payment by the warring parties of the courts costs for the time the case has wasted, at a rate equal to the combined rates charged by the lawyers of both parties. (With tripple damages of course.)

Then dismiss the case "with predjudice" and demand that the parties never darken the courts with such stupid bickering over such trivial rubbish henceforth!

<Sigh> Unfortunately very unlikely to happen. </Sigh>

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Coroner suggests cars should block mobile phones

Morrie Wyatt
Headmaster

First rule

The first rule of driving: Everyone else on the road is an idiot.

So expect the worst possible behaviour from them and drive to give yourself the chance to react when they inevitably do something stupid or unexpected. You will rarely be disappointed.

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LOHAN lays mitts on second Iridium sat comms kit

Morrie Wyatt
Joke

Warranty void if broken

The seal on the side states "Warranty void if broken"

I wonder what the warranty has to say about dropping it from 113,000 feet?

I can also picture the following scenario:

Lester: Hey, I want a new one because this one is not working!

Sales Droid: Sorry, you obviously didn't read the label. "Warranty void if broken."... Next!

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MIND CONTROL HAT makes CHOPPER do what BRAIN says

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

Someone really should let Steven Hawking have a go with this!

It would provide a huge profile boost to the project if the good professor could be seen with an ear to ear grin while piloting this thing, making it do what his muscles can no longer do.

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Thousands rally behind teen girl cuffed, expelled in harmless 'explosion'

Morrie Wyatt
Mushroom

How things have changed!

I read this article shortly after having finished reading the document mentioned below.

http://library.sciencemadness.org/library/books/ignition.pdf

It covers the development of rocket propellants in the early parts of the 20th century.

It is rather heavy on the chemistry, but the author (Yes, he is an actual rocket scientist (or chemist at least)) manages to cover a great deal of the same sort of tomfoolery that was demonstrated by Ms Wilmot, and does so in a very readable way that kept me entertained for the length of the book.

The difference is that when things went awry in their experiments, it was more than a plastic bottle that went pop-fizz. The other difference was that back then, the government and armed forces actively encouraged such experimentation.

It's well worth the read.

On the expulsion and criminal charges issue, I agree that it is a way out of proportion knee jerk reaction by a rather paranoid establishment. Disciplinary action to reinforce the need to think harder on the possible consequences of her actions before she commits them would be a more appropriate response.

Based on those rules, I would have been expelled from primary school, but that was back in the 60's where common sense (and the feel of a leather strap across the back of the legs for more serious infractions) was the norm.

Damn religious extremism and terrorism for making common sense a casualty of war.

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Readers, we need you... for LOHAN ignition failsafe brainwaves

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Variation of the tethered pin.

Swap the payload swivel with a hollow one, an inward flanged tube sitting inside an outward flanged tube with ball bearings sandwiched between the flanges.

That way you can pass the safety tether through the middle of the swivel.

(A ball retaining plate like used to support the platter in a microwave oven can be used to reduce the number of ball bearings needed without having the all bunch up at one location.)

Use a length of line for your tether in a "Y" configuration between opposing shroud lines of the chute and place a small fishing line type swivel at the junction of the Y. That way, as the chute opens, the "Y" becomes a "T", pulling the safety pin.

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