* Posts by Morrie Wyatt

85 posts • joined 14 Oct 2008

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Genes take a shot at rebooting after death

Morrie Wyatt
Angel

You have to wonder

Do these genes speak in small caps, and ride a horse named Binky?

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Apple, AT&T, Verizon named in $7bn VoIP patent claim

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

Re: "Not a troll"

But they are only after a poultry seven billion!

They do indeed look fowl.

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Zombie SCO rises from the grave again

Morrie Wyatt
Devil

Follow the Australian example.

Considering the history and expense already involved in this case:

Require TSCOG to deposit a security bond with the court before proceeding with the appeal process.

Enough to cover court costs, and the total value of IBM's counterclaims (with triple damages of course) in the event that TSCOG lose on appeal.

I'm sure that the Court can set the bond at a suitable value.

And if TSCOG do win anything on appeal, the bond is to be distributed among TSCOG's outstanding bankruptcy creditors. (Along with a very serious slapping for not having used this money for paying outstanding creditors in the first place.)

If you can't afford to lose, don't play.

(Cheques, Credit Cards, Promissory Notes, TSCOG Stock Certificates, IOU's and lotto tickets not accepted. Strictly cash or equivalents.)

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Failed school intranet project spent AU$1.4m on launch party before crashing and burning

Morrie Wyatt
Pint

Re: Australian as she is spoke

Nah, more like to to the bottom of the esky.

Now the grog's all gone and everybody's pissed!

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How to build a starship - and why we should start thinking about it now

Morrie Wyatt
Mushroom

I suppose we should.

Make the effort to check out the local planning office at Alpha Centauri just to make sure no hyperspace bypasses are on display.

Beware of the leopard!

Icon? The power to get there, and the result of the demolition of Earth to make way for the bypass of course.

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The ball's in your court, Bezos: Falcon 9 lands after launching satellites

Morrie Wyatt
Mushroom

Returned to Earth

By which I presume you actually mean landed on "Of course I still love you" somewhere out at sea?

Which makes the landing all the more impressive.

Congratulations to Elon and his crew.

(The icon? Not This Time at least.)

The fire was pointing in the correct direction so it did go to space today.

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BOFH: We're miracle workers. But you want us to fix THAT in 10 minutes?

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Sorry, must have missed it.

After that process description, the boss's eyes must have been fully glazed over, his brains dribbling from his ears, and drooling like a komodo dragon with a head cold.

And it didn't get a mention.

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'Death star' reaches out invisible hand, rips planet apart

Morrie Wyatt
Alert

Did the "B-Ark" get it right?

Sure it's not Golgafrincham?

After all, the entire compliment of the "B-Ark" was reliably informed that it was doomed.

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Australian government Slacks off in cabinet

Morrie Wyatt

Sure you spelled it correctly?

"What else do you need when you're running ruining a country?"

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AGD: silence about metadata retention plans is about security

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

Going for the classics!

Ahh, the tried and tested and certain (to fail) Security by Obscurity.

If only the "Bad guys" were like the weasels from Who Framed Roger Rabbit.

They might just laugh themselves to death.

<sigh>

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Let's Encrypt certificate authority signs first cert

Morrie Wyatt
Joke

ACME protocol?

Does it mean that we need to beware Judge Doom, falling anvils, painted tunnels, roadrunners and other such cartoon dangers?

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You've been Drudged! Malware-squirting ads appear on websites with 100+ million visitors

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Down

Safety induction sites anyone?

They, even more than advertising, are one of the banes of my existence.

They require flash, java, and a variety of other plugins such as ActiveX and every other malware magnet de-jour, just so you can answer normally blatantly obvious multi-guess questions to qualify online for access to a building site.

Particularly with our good old Australian ADSL internet access, that streams the associated videos at 0.5 bits per millennium.

All for the purposes of safety of course.

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Are smart safes secure? Not after we've USB'd them, say infosec bods

Morrie Wyatt

Is it just me?

Or is anyone else reminded of the Thunderbirds episode "Vault of Death"?

"Nosey" Parker breaking into the electronic Vault at the Bank of England with just a hairpin.

That electronically controlled vaults was a bad idea is something they worked out in 1965!

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Ant-Man: Big ideas, small payoff

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Pseudo scientific sense.

"When small, they are of course much denser and that means that, y'know, when you are a person, you still have all your man-sized strength but in a much smaller space which means ... more strength ...?"

Matter with the space removed is the basic secret behind the gravity of a black hole after all.

And I'm old enough to remember analogue mechanical wrist watches, where tapping on the crystal is a bad move, because the force would be applied through the tip of the balance wheel pivots and could smash the little ruby bearings due to the concentration of force from a wide area (the balance wheel) onto a pivot only a few thou wide.

So greater strength?

I suppose, given the suspension from a NASA Saturn V Mobile Launcher Platform to support the weight of my disbelief that there could just be the barest shade of support for the premise.

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Goodbye Vulcan: Blighty's nuclear bomber retires for the last time

Morrie Wyatt

I can only hope

That someone can film one of these final flights with special attention paid to audio quality.

There are many clips on youtube that lose out due to all of the wind noise recorded because the mic was unprotected.

I really want that howl stored in highest possible quality for future generations to experience.

Unfortunately, living in Australia I am unlikely to be able to ever hear it first hand.

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Hey Google, what’s trending? Oh, just the death of journalism

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

What a straight line!

<Fireproof Suit>

You know you set yourself up for this.

"The Register can confirm that it was not contacted."

Because Google only contacted Journalists.

</Fireproof Suit>

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Australia's data retention regime starts October 13th says A-G

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

What part of AU$131M?

The minimum figure would be AU$131M of course.

Add all running and compliance costs as a 100% tax deduction.

The only way the government should expect this retention scheme to operate is a cost to the government, not to the ISP.

Let the costs be deducted from the politicians pay packets. See how quickly they would vote that through the upper and lower houses!

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Glass door to the ancient past FOUND ON MARS

Morrie Wyatt
Holmes

Cluedo

So, it was Mustard on Mars with the Meteor what dun it!

(Icon seems the obvious one here.)

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Virgin Media wins ELEVENTH patent case against Rovi

Morrie Wyatt

Next step

Ask the court to declare them as a vexatious litigant

After that, they need to apply for court permission before throwing sue balls.

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Rand Paul stages Senate filibuster against Patriot Act

Morrie Wyatt
Big Brother

Re: Did he actually filibuster it?

In the context of Rand Paul's usage, it is a way of running down the clock.

Those that hold the majority within the senate are allegedly in favour of the bill going through, so the only way to prevent it is to stop it from reaching the vote.

The bill can't be voted upon while senate discussion is ongoing.

As I understand it, the rules explicitly permit a speaker to have their entire point of view heard, no matter how long it takes.

So as the parliamentary session is of limited duration, if Rand Paul is able to tie up all of the remaining available time, the senate will not get to put the bill to the vote during this session.

With provisions within the Patriot Act about to expire, if the vote is not taken, the expiry will drop them from the act, requiring another run through the parliament to get them re-instated.

Lather, rinse, repeat for long enough, and the Patriot Act can be de-fanged to some degree, with no further additions for an indefinite period.

(All usual disclaimers apply. IANAL, don't play one on TV, not a politician etc.)

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NASA to take MARTIAN FLYING SAUCER for a spin

Morrie Wyatt
WTF?

What's happening?

Since when was an "Olympic sized swimming pool" a valid Register unit of measure?

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By Odin, Parallels thinks cloud service providers should buy Odin

Morrie Wyatt
Facepalm

Samsung won't be happy.

As ODIN is the name of the tool to flash new firmware to their mobile phones.

Do these marketing wallys ever bother to see if the name they want to rebrand themselves with is already in common use elsewhere?

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Ouch! Google crocks capacitors and deviates DRAM to root Linux

Morrie Wyatt

It's not the fault of Linux

To be fair, this is an exploit of the underlying hardware, not a flaw in linux itself.

After all, you can slow down a hard disk disk I/O by yelling at it. (the accoustic vibration affects the read heads positioning, multiplying latency.) This is just another case of rattling the hardware until somthing breaks.

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GSMA: Er, sorry about that MWC brothel ad with our logo

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Up

So the advertising worked?

Clean up the "mass act of congress"

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Japan's death threat hacker collared ... BY A CAT

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

He knows he's in trouble.

Being caught with his hands on the kitty, the result is likely to be catastrophic.

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Forget robo-butlers – ROBO-MAIDS! New hotel staffed by slave-droids

Morrie Wyatt

Old idea.

Stainless Steel Rat.

Harry Harrison's Slippery Jim DeGriz was tampering with such establishments decades ago.

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PEAK WINDOWS 7 may well be behind us

Morrie Wyatt

Or perhaps

It could also be because microsoft are making it harder to purchase Windows 7.

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El Reg Redesign - leave your comment here.

Morrie Wyatt
Thumb Down

I'll admit to wondering

Where in hell the PFY has got to with that roll of carpet and bag of quicklime?

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Fake antivirus scams: It's a $120m business – and alleged ringleaders have just been frozen

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

Or maybe?

Couldn't we just defenestrate* the lot of them?

That would get them out of Windows.

(* From the thirteenth floor at minimum for luck, or from orbit just to be sure.)

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Heyyy! NICE e-bracelet you've got there ... SHAME if someone were to SUBPOENA it

Morrie Wyatt

Is it only me?

That sees "Healthkit" and reads Heathkit?

Or am I just showing my age.

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Munich considers dumping Linux for ... GULP ... Windows!

Morrie Wyatt

Re: Your phone works on electricity

Sorry, still wrong.

I mean opening the raw source of the message as a single unit, headers, attachments, the lot exactly as it was received and prior to any unpacking of the message contents.

Your suggestion will show the html source for the body of the message, but will not show the headers.

You can also see the headers if you wish, but the body will not be included in that view.

There seems to be no way to view the entire raw message source, headers and all in a single view.

In Thunderbird for instance, "Ctrl-U" will show the view I want to see.

(I'm talking about Outlook 2010 as the version which can't quote html contextually.)

And just to add to the fun of winmail.dat, the old (now defunct) Outlook Express would go one step further and decide that as it is not the full-blown version of Outlook, the winmail.dat attachment should be completely ignored, and no hint of it's existence is given (until you look at the raw source of the message of course, which was something tha Outlook Express _would_ do) so people would reply to the sender, stating that there was no attachment received.

Older versions of Outlook used IE as the rendering engine for html messages. 2007 used Word itself but by Outlook 2010 the rendering engine is taken from Word instead which often makes a dogs breakfast of that job too, unless the mail came from another Outlook user where it was written using the same dodgy html that Word generates.

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Morrie Wyatt

Re: An amazing piece of work?

You will note the first line of my statement was "In html mode"

I was being quite specific on that point.

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Morrie Wyatt

An amazing piece of work?

In html mode, please show me an example of contextual quoting.

Because Outlook uses the core editor from Word, it won't allow you to quote contextually, as it refuses to allow you to break up the quoted material into blocks for Question/Answer, Q/A, Q/A...

Even if you do use the necessary keystrokes to break the quoted material, when you re-open the reply thus generated, the quoted material will all be merged once again.

Outlook can turn a single line email into several kb of html cruft with every line of text having it's own font and style settings (even when they are identical to all of the previous lines).

Then there's the boondoggle that is MS-TNEF formatted RTF mode that merges everything into a file called winmail.dat, which can of course only be opened natively by Outlook. Plugins exist for various other clients, but is yet another example of how Microsoft try to Embrace, Extend, Extinguish existing standards such as MIME encoding which were already designed with this use in mind.

One of the most common things I do when receiving a message that looks a bit suspicious is to open is in raw text mode so that I can properly inspect the content and headers. Guess what? Outlook won't let you look at the raw incoming message!

What's amazing is how after all these years, Outlook still can't get such simple things right.

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Take the shame: Microsofties ADMIT to playing Internet Explorer name-change game

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

Re: Condition

Rarely an issue?

Try Honeywell's security camera recorder web interface. It requires Java AND ActiveX.

The worst of both worlds, it requires IE, and makes no guarantees about running on any recent version of that.

Internet Explorer rename?

A sows ear by any other name will still never be a silk purse, and will still smell just as bad.

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Help Australia's PM and attorney-general to define metadata

Morrie Wyatt

Bad poll

There's no "None of the above." option in any of the questions!

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Turnbull says NBN 'most reckless commitment of Commonwealth funds in our history'

Morrie Wyatt

Johnny Hart had it right.

From the comic strip BC.

Wiley's Dictionary.

Politics: A many handed game in which mudballs are trumps.

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Facebook: Want to stay in touch? Then it's Messenger or NOTHING

Morrie Wyatt

Meh.

Farcebook. Who needs it!

The sheer amount of time people waste on it each day is staggering.

Don't have an account, don't want an account, don't need Farcebook.

Too easy.

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True fact: Your CAT wees ... like a racehorse

Morrie Wyatt
Coat

To call this research

Is definitely taking the piss.

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LOHAN in FIGHT to DEATH with brace of cantankerous canards

Morrie Wyatt
Boffin

Alternate control method.

From the "makes sense to me" school of engineering, I would probably have opted to use the pivot purely as a pivot point, and moved the control horn forward of backward along the canard through a suitably sized slot in the body. Drive the system via an L shaped link to convert the horizontal movement of the servo control movement to a vertical movement of the control arm of the canard protruding through the slot. This would take the control torque away from the threaded rod of the pivot.

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Apple wheels out sueball cannon, again

Morrie Wyatt
Unhappy

What I'd love to see

I'd love to see Judge Koh reply "Denied! Award halved for being greedy and vexatious."

then add "Want to try for double or nothing, or will you stop wasting the court's time?"

When will the judiciary finally slap down these stupid patent squabbles?

Sigh!

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Microsoft blinks, extends Windows 8.1 Update deadline for consumers

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

And what of unsold stock?

With all of the unloved stock sitting on shop shelves around the world, I can just see the poor rube that purchases one only to find that they can't apply any security patches.

Or will Microsoft send someone to each of these shops to perform the update so as not to leavh customers stranded? HA!

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UN to debate killer drone ethics

Morrie Wyatt
Mushroom

Survive bureaucracy and a committee? Maybe.

If you could get the entire commitee gathered together in one place, a LAWS drone could do the job just fine.

The icon should be self explanatory, though the black helicopter should precede it of course.

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Red Hat to ship RHEL 7 release candidate with a taste of container tech

Morrie Wyatt
Linux

Re: Centos?

Even given that Centos now receives active support from Redhat, I still doubt that Centos can remove all of the trademark branding from RHEL 7 without a considerable level of due care.

So I suspect that months is the more likely answer, though probably fewer of them than the likes of Scientific Linux et al.

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US taxman blows Win XP deadline, must now spend millions on custom support

Morrie Wyatt
Black Helicopters

Can you envisage the following conversation?

(IRS) Microsoft support?

(MS) Yes, how can I help you?

(IRS) We seem to be having issues with some of our computers running Windows XP.

(MS) Sorry, XP has reached end of life and is no longer supported except where extra support fees are to be paid.

(IRS) Sorry, I missed that because the the boss was just asking about scheduling Microsoft and its staff for a tax audit. Could you repeat what you just said?

(MS) Of course. I was asking for a full description of the problem you are experiencing so I can get our staff onto the problem..

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Come to Oz for sun, surf, ratting on co-workers and surveillance

Morrie Wyatt
Stop

To quote Benjamin Franklin

"They who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

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Internet is a TOOL OF SATAN that destroys belief, study claims

Morrie Wyatt
Devil

Re: So to be safe

I was thinking more in the realms of the Babel fish entry in the guide.

1. God refuses to prove that (S)He exists, because proof denies faith, and without faith God is nothing.

2. Man then counters that the Babel fish is a dead giveaway because it could not have evolved by chance. So the fish proves that God exists, therefore (S)He doesn't. Q.E.D.

3. God says that (S)He hadn't thought of that, and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.

"Oh that was easy" says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is white, and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing."

(Or words to that effect anyway.)

So in many ways, the Internet is the equivalent to the Babel fish.

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Morrie Wyatt
Joke

So to be safe

We should steer clear of zebra crossings.

(Or so Douglas Adams tells us.)

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Brussels' antitrust boss not budging on planned Google competition deal

Morrie Wyatt
Big Brother

Do we assume?

The settlement also obligates the competing search engines to clearly show Google search entries in their results?

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VMware drops vSphere 5.5 Update 1 into sysadmins' laps

Morrie Wyatt
FAIL

Requires Adobe Flash?

Mega Fail!

A management tool that requires a continuing source of security embarrasment (flash) on top of a browser, (another cause of security headaches) on top of Windows.

Collect the whole set!

(Not that Java would be a better option.)

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Windows 8.1 Update 1 spewed online a MONTH early – by Microsoft

Morrie Wyatt
Joke

Release date?

Let me guess. The official release date would have to be April 1st, wouldn't it?

After all, Windows 8 can be best described as a bad joke, and suggesting that a point release will fix it would have to warrant an exclamation of "April Fool!"

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