Posts by The Fuzzy Wotnot
1813 posts • joined Monday 8th September 2008 12:07 GMT
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Unix doesn't matter. No?
Well I think most Fortune 500s would disagree as most of them run Unix variants on their back-end servers, Trolley!
When you grow up, leave school and head into the real world, you will find that serious computing power does not come from some Mickey-Mouse 8 node Windows thing, but 64+ node Unix clusters running proper database software that can work in the petabyte size, not fall over when it runs a 50MB Access DB!
Posted in Snails on crystal meth: The facts
Great!
Humanity takes one step up the evolutionary chain! I feel so proud of our species today!
Dogs, cats and hamsters to name a few. Sit in your house all day while you round around them, cleaning and feeding them. Whose the more evolved species again?
Well done sir!
So you made back alive across the world's most dangerous car park?!
T.Hale retail car park is a nightmare of Carmageddon/Mad Max proportions, loonies just put their foot down and head straight at you. Woe betide anyone who cannot sprint the 100m in less than 10 secs!
Profit?
Attempting to sell on eBay to make a profit?
Best of luck!
Too small!
Have you seen Independence Day?! A tiny ship crashed in Roswell, 50 years later a slipping big mothership comes along!
Mark my words this is the end as we know it!!
Stuff it, I'm off down the pub, you need beer to cushion your system during the jump into hyperspace!
Of course you do!
"HMRC takes data security extremely seriously..."
No, somehow I don't think you do. However there is no one person I can certainly no longer take seriously!
Posted in Queuing for an iPad? Why?
Cheer up you lot!
What a bunch of Negative Nigels we all are today!
If people wish to buy and cut-down Palm Pilot with a huge screen let them, they finance the innovation we will all pick up on later on when the semi-sensible companies like Acer and Asus bring their own Trigger Happy device.
Let the fanbois have some fun, iron out the niggle, pay the price and we'll reap the rewards later on with cheaper and more practical designs.
I can see this going the way of the Newton, big song and dance until everyone realises it's OK, just not quite the wonder device Lord Jobs painted it to be. That's when the Palm of it's day will step forward and do it right.
Citizen Smith
I was thinking more the episode of CS where they tried to blow Harold Fenning's safe up but destroyed the entire pub it was sitting in instead, only to find the safe still intact in the wreckage!
Brilliant idea
Yes Contactpoint was a brilliant idea...on paper! Social services would benefit some sharing info and hopefully we might stand a chance of avoiding the horrendous things that have happened due to lack of shared info.
Sadly the whole thing got put into operation by CapGem and some UK Gov quango, ( read: load of MPs and their bent mates on the make! ) and it was f**ked before the sys admins even had a chance to get the cellophane of the software!
Jesus wept....
What a complete waste of freaking time and effort!
I hope this was sponsored by big corps and not UK Gov education money? I will be even more peeved if it was my money being wasted on this tripe! People like Warwick are the boil on the bum of IT and tech research!
Hey, once a geek, always a geek!
Don't be so sure!
Seriously, last holiday I went on my missus ordered me to only take a 3 book maximum. I took Oracle DB Architecture, Oracle 11g New Features and Oracle 10g RAC Implementations.
Better than the year before, I as I had 6 Oracle books with me, hence why I was only allowed 3 this year! So I loaded the laptop with loads of Solaris, Linux and Oracle books in PDF instead.
Needless to say this was a UK holiday in a remote Scottish cottage. I hate airports!
Too right!
Listen sonny, we here on the Reg are a bunch of curmudgeons who remember when hard disks were still called "Winchesters"!
Away with you whipper-snappers and your constant need to make the most of technology! Connecting and communicating with others indeed, why next you'll be telling us anyone should be using computers!
Posted in O2 limits unlimited broadband packages
BT just don't get it.
Virgin are nobs, but at least they state clearly on the 10MB line agreement, these are times you have to be under this limit, the rest of the time you can more or less do what you like. PC's have schedulers to line up downloads, so I can beat my line to death all I like outside the limits and I only pay £15 quid a month. My ADSL was costing me £20/month for 5MB line.
Posted in BakBone ditches damp squib ColdSpark
Well there's your problem!
"the appointment of Steve Martin"
How can the self-appointed king of American movie comedy be expected to understand the day to day running of an IT technology company! You'd think the shareholders might have at least seen Roxanne or LA Story first!
Politician goes back on word shocker!
"His remarks, made on live radio, appear to be at odds with the positions he staked out prior to this month's elections."
I will try to contain my amazement...
They bothered with 64bit
Alright Google are the anti-christ at the moment but checking the download page, unlike others, they have at least managed bothered to make a 64bit DEB package for us freetards!
Posted in Fedora 13 – Linux for Applephobes
Getting there...slowly
Fedora is nothing more than a test-bed for RHEL and RedHat's ideas. Yes, it is very nice and yes it gets better with each release, but they still have a long way to go before they understand what most users want. A simple easy to use GUI, kitted with a well thought out desktop.
Sadly everyone thinks Apple are the only ones capable of making a useful GUI, they not, they simply have something semi-usable at the moment. ( I own 4 Macs by the way! )
Ubuntu have started with a firm base, then actually tried to sit down and think what will "sell" the system. "Oh yes, consider what the fleshy thing in the chair in front of it actually wants to do with it, not what fun toys we want in the kernel, that no one will ever see or get benefit from."
In car terms, Fedora is the little white Escort van, not luxury family car or big enough to be a Transit, but useful if you just need something inexpensive for doing a few oddjobs, but nothing too heavy.
Posted in Deadly phone number of doom disconnected
Oh for God's sake!
What is this, 1635? FFS! "The owners are in leagure with Grumbledook! Burn them and their families! Cast then all to the cleaning flames! Satan walks abroad this 'morrow!"
It's a number FFS! If it had been 08882467346 and 15 people had died, would they cut it off? No!
3 people have died, one from one of the biggest killers in 20th/21st centrury, cancer. The other two were killed...but they were gangsters living very, very dangerous lifestyles! They spent all day hanging about with a bunch of headcases who'd kill you as soon as look at you!!! Doesn't take a degree from the Hendon police training college to work that out!!
Going to go lie down in darkened room, wait until humanity grows up a little bit.
Posted in Google renews vows with Chrome OS
Whoa, hold on,,,
"Chrome is part of our strategy to make the web more powerful,"
Hold there...
"Chrome is part of our strategy to make GOOGLE more powerful,"
There, that's better!
Posted in PC World gets almost-exclusive iPad deal
Anothe reason to avoid then!
Unless I get seriously desperate for a tin of blank DVDs or a printer cartridge, PC World can get stuffed, I wouldn't set foot in their stores. 250 sovs for a "PC healthcheck"? Bog off you scam merchants!!
Maplin might not be much better, but at least they don't employ spotty 17 year olds who think they know all about PC's 'cos they use FaceBook!
Posted in Windows 3.0 turns 20
Windows Runtime anyone?
You lot don't remember very, very early MS apps like Excel coming with a "Windows Runtime"? I remember my old man with his mono screen 286 around 1988, buying a £400 copy of Excel on eight 5 1/4" floppies back in the late 80's! The Windows Runtime was purely for running the Excel app and nothing else, it had no File Mangler, no control panel, no nothing, just ran the app in a GUI environment from DOS.
Adults, we're nothing more than children with slightly bigger toys to play with!
We need that Super-Nanny woman, the one with the Nietzschen fetish thing going on, storm in there and give everyone a clip 'round the ear-hole and send them to all sit on their naughty steps until they grow up a bit!
Really that useful?
The in-memory model might be well and dandy on small subsets of data but when you have financial companies with very, very stringent rules on data retention and protection, plus business users with data retention fetishes who seem determined to keep 175 years of data available to report on at a seconds notice, I can't see these in-memory things doing much more than acting as front-end caches, like Oracle's TimeTen, to web server apps.
Oh an that price of $15,0000, is it $15k or $150k?
Posted in Cray-1 resurfaces in pieces on eBay
Sneakers
I want the one Ben Kingsley's shady hacker character had in the film Sneakers!
Posted in Windows 3.0 turns 20
Serious?
Ventura Publisher, the defacto DTP for a while was on GEM desktop. Ah GEM, came with my first Amstrad PC.
I actually quite liked WInodws 3.0, it was simple, uncluttered and you could tweak so many things on it to get it do odd stuff. I had page after page of useful tips on tweaking the Windows INI files. Then Windows 95 came along and it was "all mouth and no trousers", plenty of glitz but no guts.
Bonus question, what colour were the four 5 1/4" floppies that Amstrad gave away with the 1512/1640 PCs?
Yeah sure...
Stolen, that's right, stolen. Not leaked or "borrowed", stolen! Sure it was!
Well said sir!
The church can't really argue with Mr C now, can they?! LOL!
The church is no known for moving that quickly. In Bournemouth took until 1981 before they stopped calling Mary Shelley's Dr Frankenstein, blasphemous!
Freetards
Here we go, another freetard plugging his freetard agenda. "It's their fault I can't stop copying stuff I'm not entitled to! Blame them! If the internet wasn't so tempting, I would stop!".
So when software isn't enough, you going to start ram-raiding the local COMET? "Sorry officer, but it's SONY's fault! They make such shiny goods, I can't resist nicking one! They can afford it!"
Cry me a river! It's illegal, you know it, I know it and everyone knows everyone else does it! It's just 99.999% of us haven't been caught yet!
Posted in No refunds for ID card pioneers
Ha ha!
Ha hah ah ah ah ah ha ha ha ha ha! Mugs! Ha! Lol!
Hold on that was my money they wasted getting this pile of puppy-poop up and running!!!
*grumble* *grumble* Less for local services *grumble* Kids with no books *grumble* Freezing old folks *grumble*
OK
So lots of FB losers lose their sad non-existent friends on FB, forcing them to get a life. So where's the problem?!
Great!
Fantastic stuff! Many a penny wasted in my youth...
Cults? Graham Lineham said it best!
"Oh God Ted I've heard all about those mad cults! Everyone dressing in black and tell us our Lord is going to come back and judge us all!"
"No Dougal! That's us! That's catholocism!"
Die now!
From another news site: "Self-styled internet entrepreneur Jason Calacanis is planning to delete his Facebook profile live online today, reports Mike Butcher on the Techcrunch blog. Calacanis decided to announce his intentions via JasonNation, a daily e-mail brief with over 23,000 subscribers. "
THAT is why FB has to go! The entire online world, well the one with self-obessed toss-pots, seems to revolve around what people do with their chuffing FB account! FFS!!
Going to be tricky...
"No officer I cannot prove that's me in the photo, the gimp mask and rubber nurse's uniform my wife forced me to wear are back at home."
Great little skit on Horrible Histories. The Puritans mope about claiming that everything is a sin, especially having fun. Suddenly one of the Cavalier's turns up and says "You really like telling people what to do, don't you? Hmm, one might even suggest that you enjoy it and are having...fun? Fun is a sin though, isn't it?!" At which point an argument breaks out amongst the Puritans as they argue about this!
Posted in iPads may be outselling Macs two to one
Hmmm...
Computing "IN" a sofa!
Tad snug and and probably very warm too, but there is always a chance to pick up lose change and some combs people have lost down the back I suppose!
Fantastic thing about standards!
Every bugger has one and very few agree to them! Not a mess as such but as usual the major players can't agree and it's the users and especially the admins, that suffer trying to get all the codecs and supporting libraries to play nice on the various platforms!
Hold on!
Some of that gov money is ours, how about some access to this information please?!
Posted in Consumers still want it hard
Horses for courses
I love both/
If I buy a physical music CD, I tend to listen to it far more than I have MP3 downloads. MP3 downloads I have paid for do get anywhere near as much time as the physical CDs I have bought and ripped.
Books, love the convenience of being able quickly scan dozens of PDFs quickly looking for something, but love having solid tomes to hand while on the train to work. Making notes in the margins is far easier with a pencil, then on a PDA with PDF annotations. Sharing pages with my colleagues is easier with PDF docs, simply pass the URL references to the shared server and they can be reading the docs at the same time, while we are on conference calls fixing problems.
Worth it?
TPB the BT equivalent of Napster, or at least they would like to think they are. Shaun wotnot at least had the sense to sell out when it got too much to bear!
Does anyone with any nous actually use TPB anymore? Most dodgy torrents have moved over to use the decentralised open trackers no fixed trackers like TPB, it's merely the torrent files get hosted on places like TPB and Demonoid.
Dream on!
Once some mate of Camerons ( who is in cahoots with big M ) gets whiff the MSOffice subscriptions might be cut back, lots of lobbying and a couple of million later and FOSS is toast!
I love FOSS, but sadly I am a realist and as the saying goes, "Money talks and BS walks!"
IN-DUH-VIDUAL
Every time I seen teens and individuality mentioned I always remember a certain Harry Enfield sketch...
"So your band is going places, that's great. I see you have a tattoo there, what is it?"
"Oh this? Oh it runs right around my neck, it says INDIVIDUAL."
" Great, why did you have that done?"
"Well....all my mates did!"
Sod off and come back when you have grown up!
"Face it, not 1 person in Britain would return a wallet full of cash"
Nice! I think we can surmise from your incorrect use of the digit 1, that you are indeed about 9 years old! I have returned one wallet and a purse. The purse belonged to a an old lady of about 75 who was over the moon with me handing back her purse as her late husband had bought it for her.
No wonder the country is in a state with the tabloids having a field day on the report of every sordid little episode of youth crime with pathetic individuals like you about!
Do be quiet you muppet!
"Apple need to be FORCED by law to unlock the IPAD. because in it's current form it is totally useless."
What are you on pal?! That's Apple's business if they want to shoot themselves in the foot! You make a table from wood at home, I have no right to demand what colour you paint it, what colour table cloth you use on it or even how many and whom you allow to sit at it!!!
I think the iPad is utter toss quite frankly, then again I think the iPhone is utter tosh too actually and I have used Macs for over 3 years now!
Posted in Google sets sights on the dashboard
Complex software on dahsboards!
"I'm sorry we are unable to change gear as your administrator level password was incorrect. Please contact support to reset this password."
"Current time: 1136pm GMT. Lights have been disabled due to license expiration. Please contact Support to discuss license renewal."
Hold on I have dozens of these!
Indeed
Who'd a thunk that a simple 4 letter word would lure a gullible, almost entirely male, audience into clicking a link?! ( Me included! )
Sure there must be some sort of business you can set up to trap gullible people into clicking HTML links with empty promises, hmmm....
Posted in Apple locks resellers out of iPad sales
Trust me, we don't all think like that.
I like Apple desktop kit, I own some of it, it's quite nice. Apple the company and especially the cult around the risen again Lord Jobs of Cuppertino? Full of freaking, 100% A-grade horseshit! I don't get fanbois! Worshipping a businessman? Worship someone who has actually added to the sum of humankind's achievements, not a computer dealer who has lined his own nest eh?
Rather worship Jim Jones, at least you get a trip down Mexico way and a free drink at the end!
Posted in Apple locks resellers out of iPad sales
MYOB!
I don't want one thanks, but surely if Apple wants to shoot itself in the foot, that's their business?!
Actually...
...I learned that people have way too much time to search for obscure meanings in online dictionarys!
Sorry, but no...
Nothing will ever trump the "bumpy road" sign, the one every self-respecting teenager has drawn nipples on!
OK
So why the physical force?
Why the need to restrain someone in the course of their job?
Why the need to "borrow" (read :steal ) this guy's phone?
Why the need for search, when he obviously was already offering to comply with requests?
Why not simply question him, without the need for force? Why not simply speak to him like a human being, instead of treating him like some piece of drunken scum? Why not ask politely, what he was up to, why he was doing it? Why not ask for confirmation of his work to verify he was working on an assignment?
I thought the police were supposed to be all community support and gently, gently? Nope! Easier to come down hard knock a few heads, "Dat'll learn 'im proper sarge!".
Yes, there are good ones and I seem to have been lucky. The police have questioned me once while I was shooting shots off a bridge late one night. They came over and asked in a polite tone, what I was doing and why it was here? I told them exactly what I was up to, showed them the camera and they were happy. They even apologised for bothering me. That's the first step, to building trust. Not freaking hog-tie someone up and steal their stuff!!!
