For some people, "beardy" is merely metaphorical.

I bow and scrape in awe of your long, flowing chinlocks.

Small difference.

Digging out a sewer doesn't involve slicing throats.

And yes, actually, I have assisted in slurping out the contents of Gran's cesspit, before she got a sewage digester. Now that's a stench you don't forget in a hurry.

My ol' ma's fiance has a T shirt that says that.

"...right next to the potatoes and gravy."

He also has a T Shirt that says "9 out of 10 of the voices in my head say 'don't shoot'."

And he has a firearms license. Black powder. Makes his own ammo.

Help.

The only place I've ever seen a rule as strict as that...

...was the UK Census 2001. They barely allowed you to bring your own pens in just in case you had some kind of James Bond recording device embedded in it. Seriously, all phones off and checked in at the door, any equipment brought in (including aforementioned pens) to be checked by security.

Now unless you're working with that sort of data (and the vast majority of people aren't), then why the hell are people so fond of pretending to be working in, oh, the UK Census?

There are other ways, as some people here have pointed out. But, it seems some people just want to be a BOFH.

Holy christ..

..what part of "audit trail" did you not read? It means "log what your employees are doing with company resources".

If you then find said employees are doing nothing but browsing dodgy porn sites and fucking about, then you can do something about it. The device they use to do it with is hardly the problem, is it?

Some people are just itching for that little bit of power. Seriously, have you got a PFY working with you as an apprentice too?

Not going to COMPLETELY discount the research...

...however a report like that coming from "Imarat Consultants" is a little like a report with a massive Facebook logo in the corner saying how Facebook respects privacy.

And I've still seen the videos. It takes longer than 10 seconds.

Dead simple explanation

Not that I even know what's in the file but...

<last_log_file value="sometimestamp.txt" />

App checks for file. File isn't there. App doesn't have an exception for this. App panics.

Boom! Headshot.

Indeed.

You only have to trawl through Youtube looking for religious slaughter methods to realise that slicing a conscious animal's throat open is neither humane, peaceful or painless. Why do you think such slaughterhouses get an exemption from animal cruelty laws in the UK? I think maybe he interpreted the goat's struggling as a kind of play. "Hey, lookit all this red stuff pissing out of me!"

Still, at least he's not a hypocrite who cries at Bambi and then goes home to tuck into a nice dish of veal.

(yes I'm veggie, precisely because I won't kill the things myself)

Go directly to the dole queue?

Or alternatively, implement proper security, treat a MAC as more of a session token than a permanent key, and don't end up firing a bunch of people who might be smarter than you and bring in more money for the company than you because you have to act like a BOFH.

This article is about random devices leaking information out. So, have a webcafe or BTOpenZone-style web login that pinpoints who is using what and where. You get a nice audit trail showing who did what, your employees can randomize their MAC as much as they like, and you don't have to act like a bastard who thinks they are running GCHQ, ultimately engendering disrespect from your colleagues and peers. That in itself can end up proving more dangerous to your network security than any toyphone or tablet.

Only prevents honest people connecting.

ifconfig eth0 down hw ether 00:00:00:00:00:01

ifconfig eth0 up

...whups.

3 people are stuck up prats with no sense of humo(u)r.

Oh come on, that was pretty funny.

Send a link to this page in email.

I went and searched for this function, simply because I've never, ever used it in any browser.

You're right, Chrome doesn't have it, yet. There's a whole thread about it as a feature request on one of Google's forums. Some people are referring to it as a "minimum requirement", though I really don't know why. It's like people have never heard of CTRL+C/CTRL+V. Personally I'd hate a button I end up accidentally clicking and having to go "OH FUCK OFF EVOLUTION/OUTLOOK/THUNDERBIRD/WHATEVER".

I'm sure if enough people complain though, Google will write one line of Javascript and embed it into a permanent bookmark for you. Until then, bookmark this:

javascript:location.href='mailto:?SUBJECT='+document.title+'&BODY='+escape(location.href);

Taken from http://www.google.com/support/forum/p/Chrome/thread?tid=660667a236a9d1e7&hl=en

Well.

...Except for WGA, which as I understand it has been snuck onto people's computers under the guise of a "security update" at least once.

Re: Paul_Murphy

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2010/04/01/apple_headmount_patent/

That is all.

Apple keyboard?

Reminds me of the old Spectrum ZX81 and 16 keyboards!

Meh

Plenty of "better" options out there than the iWotsits. Myself, I like a fondle-toy that fits in a pocket, which the iPad doesn't. Now if the iPad really was a small, fondlable Mac even I'd be interested at the price it is. However, it's a toy with pretensions, so I'm really not.

Seriously, a 10" screen? And Saint Jobs telling us all that 7" is too small so we'll never see a 7" iPad? Might as well buy a Netbook. All the functionality of an iPad, cheaper, has a real keyboard AND you can do more with it. Including playing Angry Birds via Chipzilla's AppUp store.

The iPad and other huge tablets just won't have as much market as smaller, book-sized form factors. Either Apple will realise this and start releasing more portable slabs, or they won't and people will eventually either go Droid or Netbook. You know people get the same sort of hypnotic "Ooh Shiny, what is it where can I get it from" reaction from my nicely pocketable Tab as the iPad? Should tell you something, that.

Other iPad slayers, indeed. Sorry matey, but for many people a 10" expensive games console with no keyboard is dead on arrival. Apple seem entirely uninterested in doing anything for these people either, so they have to go elsewhere if they fancy a bit of "Ooh Shiny" that doesn't break the bank and is actually portable as opposed to merely battery operated.

Whether they go to WebOS on the other hand, is another matter entirely...

If you don't like BLINK and MARQUEE...

...You really, really won't like http://therevolvinginternet.com

Not a bit.

Re: Well.

To paraphrase a film that I'm sure plenty of geeks enjoyed (and no doubt, LSD freaks tripped out to):

"This year we put a 15 on the box."

Guess the film.

You can try scanning a bank note.

However on many scanners, it'll get halfway through and then complain that you're not allowed to scan that. Some will, some won't, but you don't know until you've bought the thing and tried it.

I've been told it's the same with printers, but I've only ever seen it in action with a scanner. Kinda creepy, really.

C - Sony

Because I'm old enough to remember when "iPod" was "Walkman".

I HAVE played with it.

Animations? Whoop de frigging do. My Tab animates the orientation change too. It adds next to nothing to the user experience. Having a half-decent processor adds to the user experience, due to things not shuddering and jerking regardless of the OS.

Changing everything for the sake of changing it does nothing for me, sorry. It's not slicker. It's not "more complete". How much more complete do you want? "Click on icon, app starts." Really, you can't get much slicker than that without dipping the thing in oil.

Larger screen? That only helps if you buy a 10" tablet, which is something I really do not want to do. I'd rather get a netbook and be able to use Windows and Linux on it, if I'm going to buy something large enough to need to be put into a bag rather than a pocket. Subjective I know, but still..

What does the Android 3.x UI do to improve things on tablets over 2.x? I'm not complaining about faster and smoother. Faster and smoother isn't the UI, it's the mechanics underneath. Unfortunately all the supporting foundations mean shit if the bricks and mortar look like a dog's dinner.

Maybe 3.x is "better" and maybe not, but I feel I really have to counter this inane, mindless, almost Apple-fan-esque drooling worship of the Honeycomb. It's not a new paradigm. It's an annoying bunch of changes. Where is the button that says "fuck this, I want it as it was, it wasn't broken so don't fix it thankyouverymuch"?

Keeping track of EVERY coupon?

That's the sort of thing that got the UK's National Identity Register quite rightly derided by near enough everyone outside of New Labour's brainwashed elite. Well, that and the awful privacy and freedom issues.

Given how many coupons are created by how many manufacturers for how many products EVERY SINGLE DAY, you would need the mother of all databases to keep track of it all. Hell, I doubt even Google would be able to keep up. Then you'd need to link that all into various disparate EPOS systems used by various disparate and often-competing businesses.

Then you need to prevent it from falling victim of fraudsters and other black hats.

I think the phrase here would be "good fucking luck".

It's what happens...

...if you piss Sarah off.

I'll be going now, before she gets that horsewhip..

Actually you would likely get sectioned.

But yes, you would likely not get the same sorts of penalties as a sane person. That's if it were proven that you are non compos mentis.

@Mark 65

"I'd leave Linux and wireless internet out of the argument if I were you.."

Two or three years ago I would have. These days a lot more wireless adapters will work with the various toy unixes. Quite a few of them say so on the packaging and if you can get one of those, it does tend to work straight out of the box with not so much as a "please insert driver CD" in sight.

As opposed to Windows 7 which with the same adapter, continually refuses to chat with DNS properly when connecting to a new network unless the adapter is reset first. Edimax model EW-7711UAn, just in case you're wondering.

Don't think the processing will be that hard.

I've done some pretty good approximations for RGB->CMYK->RGB conversions in Javascript before now. As the screen itself is probably going to have an awful refresh rate anyway, you could probably get away with some cheapo embedded microcontroller that costs about 5p when bought in bulk.