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* Posts by jack horner

23 posts • joined 7 Aug 2008

Ohio prof develops CCTV people-tracker 'ware

jack horner
Unhappy

Atypical = Nefarious?

Bah! - So that would be anyone not wearing a little santa hat or those clip-on plastic antlers?

What about the people not carrying at least three bulging shopping bags...what are they up to?

Happy Winterval.

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US Navy's robot stealth carrier plane unveiled

jack horner
Happy

Cheap knock offs...

So any bets on how long it will be before some peasant with a $25 AK shoots down one of these and sells the bits to China?

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Economists: European ancestors are what make you rich

jack horner

Guns, Germs and Steel...?

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Apologies after teacher's 'Linux holding back kids' claim

jack horner

The teacher's second name is...

Spreading communism in schools? That kid should get the chair.

Don't you know that God used microsoft word to write the bible.

(Don't tell me - she teaches creationism too...doesn't she?)

Retard.

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Nuke-nobbler raygun 747 in first full-power blast

jack horner
Alert

Rock out with your Hawk out...

"With a new and less hawkish president shortly to take up office..."

Did I just imagine that bit during the presidential preliminaries? -You know, when Barack and Hilary were trying to out-hawk each other over just how much they would obliterate Iran - should it prove to be 'necessary'.

Just how much money was it again that Hilary get from the 'defence' industry? Does the cash transfer to Barack now, or does she get to keep it?

- and who's the new guy at Defence? Don't I recognise him from somewhere?

To finish on a really depressing note - look how Blair turned out. Ethical foreign policy - ha!

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Terror in orbit: ISS piss recycler in fire alarm mishap

jack horner
Happy

@Jake

Hey! The Register is providing a valuable service to all us friendless insomniacs by allowing us to snigger at jokes that we know most other people would respond to with blank incomprehension.

Please don't try to take that away!

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jack horner
Happy

Taking the piss

"Urea-related compounds can in fact make effective explosives.."

wtf - are you trying to get us all arrested!

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DARPA wargamer calls for US X-Men superplane fleet

jack horner
Boffin

Killers Encapsulated?

Like so many other things that make warfare the fun thing it is today - the Nazis did it already:

Search for 'Personenabwurfbehälter' on http://www.luftarchiv.de/ (especially nifty version with outboard motor for sea drops - v. James Bond)

Say what you like about the Nazis - but they certainly did produce a mother-lode of whacky-weapons ideas for the US military (oh - and wasn't there something about them being genocidal fucktards too?...I can't remember....)

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BNP races to get membership list off the net

jack horner
Happy

Stop it (them)! you're (they're) killing me (somebody else)!

The potential for humour in this appears to be infinite - The BBC are currently soliciting comments from BNPers assuring them that: "Your contact details will not be published." (smirk)

Can't see them having much response to this, after all, any red-blooded, true-British-nationalist who voluntarily gave their details to the marxist-multiculturalist Bash Britain Corporation would have to be a fucking moron wouldn't they?

Will check with spEak You’re bRanes over the next few days to see how many of them have!

(hahahaha)

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jack horner
Happy

lol

Seeding: Seeds (190) Peers (301)

- well that's that injunction thoroughly fucked. - It was clearly asking for it m'lud.

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BNP membership list leaks online

jack horner
Happy

@David Barr

David...David...David.

Good in you I see, my young apprentice. Turn from the Dark side you must, before too late it is. You, what you seek, will not find there.

Ho Hum - ok, we can all be bit right-wing at times (especially when whores and cocaine are involved - apparently.) - but seriously - it's something, from which, with proper care and attention, you can make a complete recovery.

Good Luck!

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jack horner
Unhappy

Spoilsports!

Awww! - Are we not allowed to post a link to the list then?

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jack horner
Flame

@Boltar: Childish flaming-but what the hell!

Hey Boltar! You ridiculous tory-boy - Why don't you fuck off back to WoW or wherever it is you come from and if you like the BNP so much - why don't you marry them?

'...the liberal left media establishment...'

dick!

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Study clears cannabis of schizophrenia rap

jack horner
Flame

@Joerg

I'm like totally with you dude! I heard it really fucks up your precious bodily fluids too!

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Batman sues Batman over Batman

jack horner
Thumb Up

lol

Shit Films. I'm with the Turks. Ha Ha!

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When you sneeze, does Google tell the Feds?

jack horner
Black Helicopters

Working for The Man

Do I really remember seeing somewhere, a few years ago, a Google job ad asking for NSA experience and a high level of Security Clearance?

Scroogle.

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Lag log leaks - Home Office contractor loses entire prison population

jack horner
Black Helicopters

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....................

Do 'Private Contractors'* have to pass any sort of certification or vetting procedure before being allowed to lose heaps of personal data - or can anyone do it?

On the bright side - the recruitment of villainous henchmen just got a whole lot easier! HaHaHaHa...etc (Evil laughter echoes around interior of hollowed out volcano).

(*English translation: Money-hungry spivs with the right connections)

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Did we say you can read that?

jack horner
Black Helicopters

Evil Lying Scum again

How do we know when our glorious leaders are lying to us? < surely everyone knows this joke already?>

But seriously, how would we (as responsible citizens, in a 'democracy') know that the 'al Quaeda' manual is a worthless piece of shit, rather than a v. scary manual of mayhem that could cause untold loss of life if it fell into the 'wrong' hands - without reading it ourselves?

How would we know that official pronouncements about the difficulty/impossibility of making various kinds of IEDs without the help of the evil Iranians are complete and utter bullshit!!! - without reading the (US) patents on Explosively Formed Projectiles or even US Army Field Manual FM 31-20, Special Forces Operational Techniques (December 1965) which very helpfully provides a couple of (small) pages (281-283) describing their simple construction and the uses to which they can be put (by the forces of good in the battle against evil godless communism at that time, of course).

Most people won't seek out and read this stuff for themselves because they don't give a shit and are happy to go on believing whatever our masters want to tell them.

A few people who might suspect they're being fed bullshit everyday with their breakfast will be scared off by this Nazi crap. The rest (me?) can be picked off any time it's convenient. Actually I'm hoping that they don't really care whether I read this stuff, I'm not brown, don't have a beard etc - still, accidents can happen and I guess that if anyone in authority takes a dislike to me, I'm screwed!

BTW - just popped into v. excellent local remaindered bookshop (~200m from local police station) and for £4.99 picked up a reprint of the 1941 Home Guard Manual - packed with useful (and tested) info on mounting an insurgency against an invading army - of much more practical use than any number of dumb-ass internet-obtained 'al Quaeda' manuals - and apart from the ubiquitous cctv coverage - I left no evidence trail in obtaining it (or did I?- arrggh!).

Black Helicopter because - did you just hear a noise outside? (and you don't have an orange jumpsuit and nappy icon).

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Mashed up Met Police crime maps go online

jack horner
Happy

Surely it's obvious...

Why all this obsessing over rhyme? What's the problem with 'evil tory cunt'?

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BT slams bandwidth brakes on all subscribers

jack horner

Freeloaders?

BBC iPlayer? - Isn't that just used by freeloaders who want to have the MINITRU* squirt propaganda straight into their brains without having to pay for an annual Telescreen licence?

*wrong contraction? - Winston Smith seems to have withdrawn and burned my copy of '1984'.

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Webcam hacker-ogler jailed for four years

jack horner
Happy

@Echowitch

"...habitual heroine addict..."

-He spent all his time watching WonderWoman re-runs?

(Let's not even get into a discussion about tautology..).

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Hack ushers in the insatiable toll booth

jack horner

Running out of names?

Why did they call their company 'Sirit Technology' - has someone else already grabbed the name 'Shit Technology'?

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IBM solves world's 'paper or plastic' crisis

jack horner
Black Helicopters

I don't want your fckng bags! - how many times do I have to say it!!!!!

1. No I don't have a 'loyalty' card

2. No, I don't want a bag, thanks

3. I come to this shop ~ once a week, see the same till minder every time and every time you pull a bag from your stack and shove it at me without asking - and then go all slack-jawed and uncomprehending when I say no thanks.

4. Will this patent save me any time? - no of course not!

Seriously though, some greedy idiots just want to make sure that they don't miss out on OWNING something - even if anyone with half a brain can see it's a totally worthless piece of sht!

black helicopter - because - 'What do you mean - you don't have a loyalty card?'

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