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* Posts by Cucumber C Face

218 posts • joined 29 Jul 2008

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Programming Office 365: Hands On with Microsoft's new APIs

Cucumber C Face
Windows

Olé

Here's to another 21 years of VBA.

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IPv4 addresses now EXHAUSTED in Latin America and the Caribbean

Cucumber C Face
FAIL

Re: A Win Win solution!

Could you rather sell whoever missed making IPv6 back compatible with IPv4 please?

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A black box for your SUITCASE: Now your lost luggage can phone home – quite literally

Cucumber C Face
Coat

But is it waterproof ...

.... to a depth of 5+ km?

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Windows XP is finally DEAD, right? Er, not quite. Here's what to do if you're stuck with it

Cucumber C Face
Meh

>none of the scary articles seem to include any risk analysis / probabilities.<

Likewise these ATM machines are (I hope) unlikely to be sat facing the interwebs unfirewalled with a luser surfing porn using IE6 on an administrator account on them. Chances are many of these machines could remain unmolested for all eternity.

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Life support turned off: NHS Direct dies silent, undignified death

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Re: Happy day

Save your breath Mr sad-loser. The NHS is a national religion and any service which expands the ranks of the worried well merely increases the intensity of worship.

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EXPOSED: bizarre quantum sibling LOVE TRIANGLE

Cucumber C Face
Paris Hilton

I know I'm terminally confused....

... when I find amanfromMars easier to understand than the article he comments on.

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Will small biz get a bite of mega UK.gov IT pie? Yes: if it can pass the bulls**t sniff test

Cucumber C Face
Unhappy

Re: I get the impression Govt projects *never* plan for change

> the basic principle of taxation doesn't change <

I'm not so sure. The principles do change.

To take one possible change in the pipeline - married couples' allowances. Might the (re-)introduction of that hose your data model and code base - or could it handle that with just a soft configuration change?

(Well outside my domain - would genuinely like to know).

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Switzerland to set up 'Swiss cloud' free of NSA, GCHQ snooping (it hopes)

Cucumber C Face
Thumb Up

Possibly the best country in the World

I am in favour of low taxation jurisdictions offering solutions that put pressure on high tax jurisdictions to compete. (Also applies to Switzerland - no coincidence I suggest)

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Windows 8.1: A bit square, sure, but WAIT! It has a Start button

Cucumber C Face
Joke

Re: lipstick on a pig

.... only you wouldn't expect to apply the pig's own bodyweight in lipstick. You might even be able to use the same tube of lipstick to more than one porker.

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BBC's Clangers returns in £5m 'New Age' remake

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Re: Why can't they write some new programmes?

Well the big budget revamp worked for Dr Who I'm told. (Never seen the post-hiatus Who.)

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MS Word deserves DEATH says Brit SciFi author Charles Stross

Cucumber C Face
Windows

Word Perfect largely has itself to blame for it's demise

While I don't dispute one could do a great job with Word Perfect back in the 1980's - IMHO it made Vi and Edlin seem like user friendly text processors by comparison.

Ease of use (by the untrained majority) was where WP 5.1 lost out to Microsoft Word V2. The much belated Windows GUI version of WP stank (yes I know about the hidden api stuff) but they never caught up.

By the time MS lost the plot with the ribbon it obviously had all been over for 15 years.

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Look out, world! HP's found a use for Autonomy - rescuing Win XP bods

Cucumber C Face
WTF?

A bear of little brain asks...

Is difficulty 'moving data' the burning problem keeping people on XP?

So it's nothing to do with losing perfectly functional 16 bit apps; retraining lusers on crappy UI's; legacy hardware with no Vista (and later) drivers or the inability to run Office 2003 on Windoze 8 then.

I know XP arrived when PCs still (just about) came with floppy discs but.. (see icon)

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Tencent offers 10TB of free cloud storage for all

Cucumber C Face
Windows

File size limit

The other hidden gotcha with these services is the maximum file size - last time I tried Microsoft's Sky Drive it was 100 MB for them.

This pretty much stuffs storage of HD movies, large database backups and large encrypted containers (i.e. pretty much the only things that would potentially soak up terabytes of space) - unless you fancy splitting them before uploading.

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Billionaire Google founder splits with wife, allegedly beds Google Glass minx

Cucumber C Face
Holmes

Welcome To Marketing

... the Department which always has the hottest babes, the ugliest dudes and the ethics of an anthrax bacillus.

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Bradley Manning is no more. 'Call me Chelsea,' she says

Cucumber C Face
Paris Hilton

Whistleblower == outsider?

Perhaps your average family guy / team player / good old boy is less likely to rock the boat. Whatever else, you have to admire Bradley/Chelsea's cojones.

Paris? Blowing a different kind of whistle.

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3

Windows NT: Remember Microsoft's almost perfect 20-year-old?

Cucumber C Face
Windows

Re: A question from a young'un of 31...

>I have wondered WTF was the bloody point of Windows 95, 98 and (trigger warning) Milennium Edition?<

NT 3.5 won me over and 3.51 was a revelation. It was games which kept me (and millions of others) dual booting into DOS/95/98 well into the noughties. Doom, Duke Nukem etc. needed to hit the hardware (the ports you get now weren't available and would probably have been too CPU/RAM intensive even if they had been). Most business DOS apps could be coaxed into running on NT with various degrees of pain.

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ZTE's $80 Firefox OS mobe sells out on eBay

Cucumber C Face
Headmaster

256 MB RAM? Luxury!

Microsoft - scarcely known for their lean creations - in 1995 shipped Windows NT 3.51 which ran very well with 32 MB RAM on less beefy CPUs than smartphones have today. 256 MB was still a fair size for a desktop hard disc. Win NT 3.51 was perfectly capable of running background services and multi-tasking.

I know it's chalk and cheese but I suggest some perspective is needed.

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They don't recognise us as HUMAN: Disability groups want CAPTCHAs killed

Cucumber C Face
Facepalm

Form radio buttons - I am a spammer=default

If one is looking to reduce post spam - a radio/options array on the HTML form with 'I am a human being' not the default option foxes 99.9% of the script kiddies.

If the bot can get through that and/or there's anything more precious you're protecting - captcha's probably aren't going to buy you much more.

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WikiLeaker Bradley Manning found not guilty of 'aiding the enemy'

Cucumber C Face
Unhappy

accidental killing ... by a US helicopter gunship

There's accidents , there's reckless homicide and there's murder for 'fun'.

Clip (with crucial audio)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogFZlRiTHuw

Why aren't these guys facing a Military tribunal?

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Five bods wrongly cuffed thanks to bungled comms snooping in UK

Cucumber C Face
Holmes

Fishing expeditions

Prevention is NOT always better than cure - but to appreciate that you have to apply more sophisticated reasoning than an amoeba.

The same dilemma exists for screening healthy people for diseases in medicine.

'Screening' starts with the default assumption that the patient has heart disease, breast cancer whatever - and you then set out to prove the negative.

There is always a false positive error rate in whatever test you apply.

Therefore one should accept

1. normal people are going to be misdiagnosed

2. if the damage (and/or number) of misdiagnoses exceeds the benefits (and/or numbers) of correct diagnoses you abandon the screening program

Harvest (say) a million internet transactions to catch the one in a million by a p@edo/terrorist/tax dodger. Say your test has the unbelievably impressive false positive rate of 0.01 percent (1:10000) and 100 percent true positive rate.

You will 'detect' one terrorist whilst falsely accusing 100 innocent people.

Not looking so good for the snoopers - even with highly optimistic assumptions of prevalence of bad guys and performance of the screening instrument.

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PM writes ISPs' web filter ads for them - and it must say 'default on'

Cucumber C Face
Childcatcher

Re: Jobs bonanza!

>the job adverts for thousands upon thousands of people to check the content of billions upon billions of URIs to categorise them<

Nah... cheaper to issue a whitelist : .gov.uk .bbc.co.uk Job's done.

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Apple MacBook Air 13-inch 2013: Windows struggles in Boot Camp

Cucumber C Face
Thumb Up

Re: Attention grabbing title ?!?

Running Mountain Lion and Windows 8 on Bootcamp on a Mac Book Pro (8 GB RAM / i5 2.5 GHz / 250 GB SSD). Windows 8 runs like a rocket on this admittedly silly money kit - imagine the Air in this review might be a bit underpowered.

Install (via USB NOT DVD) flawless and perfect hardware support. Do not be an berk like me and try to partition the Windows disc from inside Windows.. (I totally bricked both OS.. needed to reinstall from scratch) .. otherwise totally recommended.

I do Windows based development but need Mac for testing cross-platform stuff. I would buy a top of range Windows laptop anyway and would otherwise need a separate Mac. So stll quids in.. just.

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Brit fantasy artist sues James Cameron over Avatar world

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Why no stills from the movie?

I have never seen Avatar (yes - I'm the one) - whereas I am familiar with Roger Dean's work.

Everywhere these news stories are replete with pictures of Roger Dean's LP sleeve art. None of them have stills from the movie. It's almost like Cameron doesn't want his work copied.

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SURPRISE! BT bags more gov broadband cash - this time in Bucks & Herts

Cucumber C Face
Holmes

Re: but...

Hmm... we're firmly in London's upmarket commuter belt here but with some Conservative marginals in Herts. And then of course Bucks is being skewered by HS2 - if you're having half a million squid knocked off the value of your property this might make you feel a tiny bit better.

BT were ever the wh*re to the incumbent government.

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Tor users locked out of Facebook after wave of dodgy traffic

Cucumber C Face

Re: Users of the Tor traffic anonymizing service are currently locked out of Facebook

Hmm.. we routinely block traffic from all Tor exit nodes on our (non-registration and wholly uncontroversial) web site.

I am sorry we have to do this.

I support and occassionally use the Tor service. However the bad traffic emanating from >a relative few< exit node IP addresses is staggering i.e. vulnerability scanning, post-spamming, scraping, high speed rule breaking bots etc. I don't think much of this traffic is actually routed via Tor - people just put a Tor exit node on their box to give them plausible deniability.

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Lonely G-Cloud wanders in search of crowd o'er UK.gov vales and hills

Cucumber C Face
FAIL

G-Cloud - a solution in search of a problem

The problem being - how does the Government get a press release which make them look hip with the cutting edge of technology?

We must be grateful I suppose that the Coalation only p*ss*s hundreds of millions up the wall on this kind of BS rather than the billions New Labour used to,

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Intel: Haswell is biggest 'generational leap' we have EVER DONE

Cucumber C Face
Meh

Re: 2-in-1 WTF?

OK I think it goes like this..

The Spice Girls had a song 'Two become one'.

Ginger Spice aka Geri Halliwell - sounds like Haswell.

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Microsoft touts business features of Windows 8.1

Cucumber C Face
Coat

re: We want a new OS just not this one.

Actually UI wise - I want Windows 2000 / Office 2003.

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My bleak tech reality: You can't trust anyone or anything, anymore

Cucumber C Face
Childcatcher

>how we got into the position whereby our leaders, or moreover, the people behind our leaders care so little about the privacy and rights upon which most of our nations were founded.<

Because the media and Lumpenprole demand the sacrifice of freedom for security from pedo-drug dealer-turrorist-tax avoiders.

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Moss reanimates after 400 years in DEEP FREEZE

Cucumber C Face
Facepalm

Glaciers flow...

.. just because the (otherwise) advancing edge is melting doesn't mean the glacier is retreating.

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Internet2 superfast-boffinry network peers with Azure cloud

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Through Internet2 we can support a small number of very large flows

Hmm.. does this look a little like Internet1 circa 1990?

i.e. it's high time they allocate 99.9% of the address space to US govt institutions, universities, megacorps, bagel stores, kindergartens etc. before the rest of the World gets a look in.

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UK MPs tell Google: Get back here and bring your auditors with you

Cucumber C Face
Thumb Up

Re: STOP THE ROT

Pity you posted anonymously - I want to have your babies

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Queen's Speech: 'Problem of matching IP addresses' to be probed

Cucumber C Face
Facepalm

Re: If more proof were needed...

True - but there are people out there dumber than the politicians.

The average child murderer or terrorist bomber does seem incapable of emptying (much less wiping) their Internet browsing history and cache - let alone fathom VPNs, anonymous proxies, MAC obfuscation etc.

This does give the illusion that a mega-log of everything an ISP sees could be trawled for suspicious activity.

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Google 'will be pulled back in front of MPs' on its UK tax affairs

Cucumber C Face
Facepalm

Re: Another PR stunt by MPs

change the law OR change the tax rate to compete with Ireland.

Why should UK based businesses pay more than any business based (nominally or actually) in Ireland?

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Are biofuels Europe's sh*ttiest idea ever?

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Re: the efficiency of plants converting sunlight to fuel is abysmally low

Hmm... efficiency not the whole story.

When solar panels have renewably sustained 99.9999999% of life on Earth (excluding hydrothermal vents) for a billion or so years AND while doing so laid down as much fossil fuel - get back to us.

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Maggie Thatcher: The Iron Lady who saved us from drab Post Office mobes

Cucumber C Face
Headmaster

Re: In a mental institution..

No actually you're wrong there.

"Care in The Community" (National Health Service and Community Care Act 1990) a.k.a. all but eliminate inpatient mental health - neglect or underfund community care - came in right around the end of her administration.

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Publishing ANYTHING on .uk? From now, Big Library gets copies

Cucumber C Face
Childcatcher

Research is no defence...

One assumes they'll catalogue any terrorist manuals (and worse) out there on .uk

I assume the legal framework must give them specific immunity from the default assumption that copying to local storage='making'

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Review: Intel Next Unit of Computing barebones desktop PC

Cucumber C Face
Unhappy

zOMG - you can only learn to program on a Pi

>Running Ubuntu means there’s no reason why the NUC can’t be used to learn programming the way the Pi can<

Is there any reason that one can't learn most second or later generation languages on just about any mainstream OS running on any piece of hardware?

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Business intelligence startup tarts up Hadoop for managers

Cucumber C Face
Angel

Triple whammy

Brilliant marketing concept -

1. managers can get hard ons playing directly with 'Big Data' until the next buzzword comes along

2. they never understood RDBMS and SQL anyway

3. they never figured how to create a table in Microsoft Word

So as long as the graphical user interface looks like Excel these BI guys have a license to print money

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Torvalds asks 'Why do PC manufacturers even bother any more?'

Cucumber C Face
Coat

Re: Popping Clogs

>hobble an old vista pc to continually boot loop, until only a handful of people survive.<

Vista booting eh - your would be victims will likely die of old age before it gets there

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Unlucky for you: UK crypto-duo 'crack' HTTPS in Lucky 13 attack

Cucumber C Face
Childcatcher

Re: Login cookie for TOR

>nonces in the TOR authentication protocol<

Double entendre intentional?

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BT to end traffic throttling - claims capacity is FAT

Cucumber C Face
Black Helicopters

@Peter 26 VPN

Don't know why you're copping downvotes on this. I have to use a VPN on BT ADSL at my parent's place to get access to certain ports >at all< never mind BT's throttling, the obvious monitoring of URLs you attempt to visit etc.

I also use the VPN to get past T-Mobile oh so helpfully reducing image resolution and rewriting all the javascript on web pages you visit through their 3G service.

FWIW I use VyperVPN. Being a US company this probably also saves the CIA the effort of requesting my traffic logs from gov.uk ;-)

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Sick software nasty uses child abuse pics to extort infected victims

Cucumber C Face
FAIL

Thought experiment

If the malware had placed a picture of a murder being committed onto your hard drive it would be an evil and unpleasant act.

However would you thereby be placed in a position where you would be accused of murder?

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Cucumber C Face
Flame

Re: What about UK?

Why bother with the porn?

For the UK they could just plant a random data file with a size evenly divisible by 512 on the victims hard drive.

"That's a True Crypt file - open it if you're not a drug-ped0-terrorist"

Nothing to hide nothing to fear. Guilty until proven innocent.

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Mobes, web filth 'PORNIFYING' our kids, warns top Labour MP

Cucumber C Face
Headmaster

Re: On Radio 5 Today ....

>some young men now prefer anal sex as they think pubic hair is disgusting<

Non-sequitur - what about the young men who prefer anal sex with hairy bums?

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