* Posts by Anonymous Custard

1122 posts • joined 25 Jul 2008

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Microsoft Edge web browser: A well-presented mea culpa

Anonymous Custard
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Big Brother

Re: "It's worth turning on the (potentially) privacy-invading Cortana for that feature alone."

Also doesn't Edge use cloud-based cookies, which you can't turn off and which will be of course available for MS to use as they wish. Hand in hand with Cortana, we also have

"...collects and uses various types of data, such as your device location, data from your calendar, the apps you use, data from your emails and text messages, who you call, your contacts and how often you interact with them on your device. ... also learns about you by collecting data about how you use your device and other services, such as your music, alarm settings, whether the lock screen is on, what you view and purchase, your browse and Bing search history, and more."

And

"We will access, disclose and preserve personal data, including your content (such as the content of your emails, other private communications or files in private folders), when we have a good faith belief that doing so is necessary to protect our customers or enforce the terms governing the use of the services"

I'm reasonably sure at least some of that is illegal under UK laws, and bits are positively Orwellian.

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Sixty-five THOUSAND Range Rovers recalled over DOOR software glitch

Anonymous Custard
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I think that's fairly standard across most makes though.

Over the years I've had similar discussions with mechanics who have services my company cars (VW, Vauxhall Peugeot and Ford) and they've all said the same thing. And if you look at the cars those mechanics drive, it's very rarely the make that they are employed to work on...

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Forget lasers: how about sharks with frikkin' VOLCANOES?

Anonymous Custard
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Boffin

Forget the lasers?

I would have expected living in a volcano would make them more likely to be laser-wielding, not less...

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Why the BBC is stuffing free Micro:bit computers into schoolkids' satchels

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Year 7 = 11 years old

Although its a bit of a shame, as one of the early ideas mooted for the prototype was as a wearable (basically a programmable badge or pin depending on which side of the pond you are). Having a couple of AAA's hanging off it would I guess rather spoil that.

My eldest is going up to year 7 in September, so will be interesting to see what she and her class (and their teacher) make of it, or if it ends up coming home and joining the Pi in extra-curricular education of coding and suchlike.

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Pluto probe brain OVERLOAD: Titsup New Horizons explained

Anonymous Custard
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Trollface

Slam code

Anyone else think that having a contingency plan involving pushing out a "Slam Code" to a probe doing a fly-by is just asking for a misunderstanding or is tempting fate...?

Still heavy kudos and pints to all involved. Another in a series of good jobs for the probe, rover and satellite mob.

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What Murphy’s law has to teach you about data centres

Anonymous Custard
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Boffin

Ah, Schroedinger's Sysadmin...

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Anonymous Custard
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Headmaster

And not forgetting the extension to Murphy's Law - "If it cannot go wrong, it will probably still go wrong just out of spite and to make you look like an idiot for not being paranoid enough with your disaster prediction and understanding..."

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Anonymous Custard
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To which add "Management have scheduled crisis meetings for every hour - your attendance is mandatory".

My usual answer to such is "Do you want me to talk about fixing it, or do you want me to actually just fix it and we can then discuss it later?" I usually find that focuses the mind, even of managers.

This is doubly true when they also insist that you have a full and nicely tuned PowerPoint presentation to bring to the meeting, as they need pretty graphs and whizzy animations to have a hope in hell of understanding anything even slightly technical.

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This box beams cafes' Wi-Fi over 4kms so you can surf in obscurity

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

Re: You would need a book nobody reads on a shelf nobody visits.

I also wonder if someone should tell him that eBooks aren't physical books on a library shelf that also need to have a power lead running to them? ;-)

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That man told me to stuff a ROLE up my USER ENTRY!

Anonymous Custard
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I would certainly agree with the sentiment, but from experience "senior manager" and "gets the work done" are mutually exclusive. At least unless the only privs and accesses you need relate to arranging meeting rooms and issuing minutes.

Normally asking for enough priv's "so I don't have to bother you again asking for what I need" to the IT person is usually enough, especially if requested over a pint (or the promise of one, duly delivered).

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Anonymous Custard
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Headmaster

Re: "To question the managerial understanding of business processes"

The usual answer to "What is your role" has to be either "minion" (which in this case would ironically have been right), "blame magnet", "unsung hero" or "ground zero", depending on situation and whom you are talking to (whether they have a sense of humour and/or the right to get you fired).

Either that or you just pick the role that has the rights/privs/access/whatever you need to actually get things done, although most of the time "miracle worker" seems not to be on the list when it's needed...

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GM's cheaper-than-Tesla 'leccy car tested at batt-powered data centre

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

Re: What a horrible paint job

As these things are very quiet and hard to hear coming, maybe the driver should roll the window down and shout loudly "I'm coming! I'm coming"

I thought that was more the mantra of the back seat than the drivers seat...

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Beyond the Grave: US Navy pays peanuts for Windows XP support

Anonymous Custard
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Trollface

Choices, choices...

The security patches are likely to cost little more than Navy expenditure on toilet rolls.

Yes, but if push comes to shove, which one would you rather do without?

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Flushed with success: No bog standard Canadian goldfish these

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Diversify!

It's his Canadian cousin, Couper Ma Propre Gorge Dibbler.

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This whopping 16-bit computer processor is being built by hand, transistor by transistor

Anonymous Custard
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And a pipe...

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Anonymous Custard
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Re: Completely and utterly bonkers

Given some of the stuff they put in there, he could probably get a room in the Tate Modern for it for a while too.

Wonderful stuff anyway, hope it doesn't drive him too crazy getting it finished and debugged.

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DEATH by VEGETABLES: Woman charged with killing boyf using carrots. And peas

Anonymous Custard
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Death by kitchen cupboard. At least that's what mine tried a couple of nights ago when I opened it and it rained tins down on me.

I really must tidy it up one of these days...

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US students prevail in rocket-powered egg challenge

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Happy times

Oh, and for those who want to waste a bit of time, I give you:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/archive/great_egg_race/

Complete with 13 episodes from 1979-1986. Includes the first one (Egg Mobiles), in which the Prof was only a judge, not the presenter (that was Brian "Playschool" Cant, plus Charlotte Allen). Learn something new every day researching el Reg posts...

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Anonymous Custard
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Boffin

Re: Happy times

Indeed, met him a few years back and he's still on cracking form.

Alternatively I also give you Scrapheap Challenge in a similar(ish) mad engineering vein.

TGER never did rockets (at least that I can recall), but SC did them in some form or other at least twice - S01E06 and S10E07.

The second one's rocket powered trains, not quite the same but great fun and includes a home-made jet engine. First one's proper rockets though, albeit with snow globes rather than eggs. And had Bowser Munson in it, which is always a bonus.

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Arkansas Kum & Go onanist did just that

Anonymous Custard
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May one ask how?

I keep seeing them around the place (like your welcome mat one also) and am intrigued...

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BOOM! Stephen Elop shuffled out of Microsoft door

Anonymous Custard
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Re: "Chief insights officer"

I would say corporate dogsbody and corporate ground-zero, but I think I already have those titles (unpaid and unofficial of course)...

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Anonymous Custard
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I can't see Elop anybody crying over his exit from Microsoft.

FTFY

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Bezos' bozos swing ban-hammer at media player

Anonymous Custard
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You don't even need the Play Store, just download it directly from the Kodi website.

And if all else fails, the Fire stick can just be replaced by an Apple TV 2 or a Pi. Not quite as convenient a form-factor, but both are still very usable for the job (my Kodi runs nicely from a Pi mk 1, as well as on my laptop and Nexus 7).

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Anonymous Custard
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FAIL

Re: The Internet facilitates piracy...

This would be the same Amazon who are quite happy to promote and sell you a dodgy box with an XMBC/kodi install crammed full of the self-same 3rd party crapware add-ons that are used to view the pirated streaming content through their online store?

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Anonymous Custard
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FAIL

Ultimate stupidity

So they banhammer Kodi, whose devs and forums go out of their way to not support the piracy add-ons and to do all they can not to promote or support piracy, and yet the Amazon appstore contains loads of older XBMC-forked apps which come pre-loaded with all the piracy shit. For examples iXBMC, XBMC4U, TVMC, ZappoTV, and VidOn (at the risk of publicising them, which I have no desire to do).

So it's a nice one all-round (not!), they've managed to ban the only one who is actively anti-piracy...

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Raspberry Pi guys want you to go topless in the heat

Anonymous Custard
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Have a look at this one:

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/plusberry-pi-media-box-running-on-raspberry-pi#/story

Doesn't quite hit all your targets (to do that I think you'd need a PC case), but does a fair amount of them. It's fully funded, currently in the final stages of production and is due to start shipping within a few weeks...

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Testing Windows 10 on Surface 3: Perfect combo or buggy embuggerance?

Anonymous Custard
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Re: This is getting silly

As the saying goes, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it..."

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Anonymous Custard
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Joke

As it turned out, Microsoft's success was limited

As it turned out, Microsoft's success was limited

Have you ever thought about a career in diplomacy?

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Limited edition Iron Man S6 sells for $91,000 thanks to ... serial number

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

And Iron Maiden must be kicking themselves for not including the actual numbers on their historic album cover...

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Cortana threatens to blow away ESC key

Anonymous Custard
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Mushroom

Not to mention HP, who decided it would be great for users to put another row of keys down the left hand side of the keyboard for quick access to things like calculator, print and a whole host of other stuff that we don't need keys for.

And to top it off they put the print one beside the left hand shift key, so at least 4 times out of 5 when I'm typing on the wife's HP laptop and I want something in upper case, I almost end up printing the damn document out instead (or occasionally do so, if I'm not quick enough to catch it)...

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LOHAN'S PRATCHETT mission set to soar Saturday

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

There was, but he heard about the mission and ran away...

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Anonymous Custard
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God(s) Speed...

And may you have a potent voyage!

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Microsoft picks up shotgun, walks 'Modern apps' behind the shed

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

Re: Modern Applications

Maybe some manager in Microsoft told his team that he wanted bigger numbers for modern apps, and they misunderstood him?

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It's 2015 and hackers can hijack your Windows PC if you watch a web video

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Wot, no video?

And crafted specially along the lines of MS15-057?

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Did you almost prang a 737 jet with a drone over Dallas? The FAA would like a word

Anonymous Custard
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Mushroom

Re: You don't understand...

Nah, taken to a suitable test rig and made to watch whilst their drone is fed into the engine to show exactly what happens. And then pushed in after it, for being a gormless twat.

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Power your temperature sensor with this BONKERS router hack

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Cow Fart Powered Cars Anyone?

Or even more friendly, the Poo Powered Bus (and no, it is actually real, albeit not quite as "directly" powered as the pictures on it suggest).

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Anonymous Custard
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Mushroom

Re: Energy Efficiency

Or just pop your IoT shit into either of the above containers, take it to the nearest electrical recycling point and dump it there and be done with it?

Either that or along with this go out and buy a nice hefty club to fend off all your pissed-off neighbours whose wifi no longer works as it's suddenly flooded by all your noise.

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The watts in a box that kept West London's lights on

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Solution? RBMPG (Rodentia Based Micro Power Generation)

Good excuse for putting in a brand new company gym, with loads of excerise bikes and such subtly connected to a few dynamos?

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BOFH: Step into my office. Now take a deep breath

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Superb

Amen to that - too late for a cuppa and just slightly too early for a beer (although it is a nice sunny day outside, so maybe...).

Filled that awkward Friday afternoon gap nicely :)

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NASA shock: Flying saucer predicted over Hawaii on Wednesday

Anonymous Custard
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Re: Typical (Not really!)

And I think you mean "Elmer Phud", not Pontius Pilate.

Nah, Bob's on the money - just ask his mate Biggus Dickus.

For a wascally wabbit, you need a shotgun, not a wocket. We save those for chasing Woadwunners.

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Anonymous Custard
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Re: LOHAN on steroids

And of course don't have the FAA dicking them about and delaying everything...

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Anonymous Custard
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Joke

Splat?

Personally I still think it looks like a massive custard pie...

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Spaniards get that cinking feeling

Anonymous Custard
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Headmaster

Siesting and sofing

Come on, we have to reimport those two back into English usage over here too...

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One USB plug to rule them all? That's sensible, but no...

Anonymous Custard
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Headmaster

As the old saying goes...

The joy of standards are that there are so many to choose from...

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Chinese bloke escapes execution for Forbidden City nude photo shoot

Anonymous Custard
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Childcatcher

Re: Disgusting!

Not to mention her ankles - what would Queen Victoria think?

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Fanbois designing Windows 10 – where's it going to end?

Anonymous Custard
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A novel idea?

How about just making it user configurable and let us have the choice for how we want our own desktops? Even down to the manga wallpaper... :)

Or is too much choice deemed even worse than enforced choice for the poor guys who have to use the product?

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Intel adopts 40Gb per SECOND USB-C plug for Thunderbolt 3.0

Anonymous Custard
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Joke

Re: Over 4000?!

iWatch 2.0 with USB-C / Thunderbolt port?

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Anonymous Custard
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$$$$$$$$$$$

And of course the key question is how much are they going to sting people for the cabling etc, compared to the cost of standard USB C cabling or other competitor options like AMD's Lightning Bolt?

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LOHAN team preps PRATCHETT mission

Anonymous Custard
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Indeed, or at least paint it lilac and christen the box itself "Potent Voyager".

Anyway congrats to Alex, and pints all round to the team.

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ZX Spectrum 'Hobbit' revival sparks developer dispute

Anonymous Custard
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Big Brother

I just wonder..

are the pale bulbous eyes watching over them?

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