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* Posts by Zack Mollusc

222 posts • joined 20 Jul 2008

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4K-ing excellent TV is on its way ... in its own sweet time, natch

Zack Mollusc

Progress marches on.

Ooh, once upon a time i had an old CRT telly because I was too cheap to buy a flat screen telly, then I had an old CRT telly because I was too cheap to buy an HD-ready telly, now I have an old CRT telly because I am too cheap to buy an HD telly.

Soon I will have an old CRT telly because I am too cheap to buy a 4K telly!

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Zack Mollusc

Never replace DVD

When did you start buying your DVDs? Shouldn't the early ones have started delaminating and oxidising by now?

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New 'Cosmos' browser surfs the net by TXT alone

Zack Mollusc

Great Scott!

If this kind of technology exists - presenting as a normal web browser to the server, then filtering out all the javascript, pictures and audio - then the first person to release an App based on it will make a fortune!

Yes, you will still rack up the data charges, but the signal/noise will be INCREDIBLE!

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Govt waves stick at pirate-friendly Google search

Zack Mollusc
Unhappy

Theft

They can't crack down hard enough on these evil pirates.

I am CEO of an insurance company and, until this internet thing came along, we used to only deal with a few hundred claims for theft a month. Some little toerag would nick a Nolans 45 from the counter at Woollies and we would pay out the 50p that it was insured for, now that same toerag has grown up and is 'Downloading' 'Files' from pirate sites such as 'Napster' and the 'Cloud' and we are paying out hundreds of millions of pounds an hour.

A particularly bad case was when a 'Hacking Pirate' was arrested and the Armed Response Unit who had torn the street down with their tank reported that the 'Hacking Pirate' had used mirrored servers and tape backups! This meant that we had to pay out FIVE times as much for each infringement because the music was either 500% more stolen or had been stolen an extra 4 times. We never did work out which.

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Kaspersky backpedals on 'done nothing wrong, nothing to fear' blather

Zack Mollusc

not blather

It is completely true that if you have done nothing wrong, you have nothing to fear from state 'security' 'services'.

Unfortunately, they can just redefine 'wrong' to suit their aims.

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Need a green traffic light all the way home? Easy with insecure street signals, say researchers

Zack Mollusc
Meh

<quote>while it's not possible to force the lamps into weird combinations, such as red and green together, it's possible to cause congestion</quote>

Well, duh. Traffic lights cause congestion. That is what they do. That and cause envelopes of folding money to appear in town planners' pockets.

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TV transport tech, part 1: From server to sofa at the touch of a button

Zack Mollusc

Re: Virgin Media is great and all that...

If they cut my service, I will just cancel the direct debit and look elsewhere. I have an open fire so they can send as many letters as they like.

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Zack Mollusc

Re: Source Material Quality

As a virgin media customer, I can confirm the low picture quality. I see compression artifacts on my 28 inch CRT telly, so christ knows how bad it must look on a modern big screen. Fortunately, the content is so rubbish that I don't mind the low picture quality it is presented in.

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Stand clear! Will HTC's One act as a defibrillator for Windows Phone?

Zack Mollusc

I strongly approve!

I had an HTC One X, this led me to place HTC on my NEVER BUY FROM THESE IDIOTS AGAIN list.

Now they have Microsoft software as well. Super! It saves me re-evaluation time. Perhaps they could also incorporate something from BlackBerry and achieve a hat-trick of lameness.

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Gigantic toothless 'DRAGONS' dominated Earth's early skies

Zack Mollusc

fish?

I am not sure that the Azhdarchid Pterosaurs would have eaten fish. I have seen hang-glider and microlight pilots cluster near rivers and lakes and they nearly always ate cream buns and drank cups of tea.

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This'll end well: US govt says car-to-car jibber-jabber will SAVE lives

Zack Mollusc

Roundabouts

Roundabouts are only a short-term solution to the problem of traffic-light companies bribing corrupt officials into buying their products.

The traffic-light companies bribe corrupt officials into putting traffic lights on the roundabouts.

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YES YES YES! Apple patents mousy, pressure-sensing iVibrator

Zack Mollusc

Re: so just like...

Hahaha, I did the same thing with a 250 Superdream. Whilst ticking over on the centre stand it wandered all over the concrete patio (well, concrete back yard).

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Gov.uk's broadband boast: Superfast fibre piped to 1 million Brits

Zack Mollusc

Re: Lies, damn lies, and BDUK ...

' That's how it works in the commercial world. You lie, you lose. '

Really? When was this EVER the case?

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What's the point of the Internet of Things?

Zack Mollusc

Re: No convinced

I'm quite unconvinced too. You forgot :

- utterly fails to solve the original problem, but creates a bunch of new ones...

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BT FON fail: Telco CHARGES customers for FREE Wi-Fi usage

Zack Mollusc
WTF?

Free FON wifi

Er, if you buy the cheapest and lamest internets from BT, what is to stop you connecting through the FON and using loads of data? Other than billing cock-ups.

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NASA tests crazytech flying saucer thruster, could reach Mars in days

Zack Mollusc
Meh

Clean? Free?

LNER was never free and certainly not clean! Belching clouds of coal smoke and dripping oil all over the tracks is a more accurate description. You are an idiot.

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Verizon to FCC: What ya looking at? Everyone throttles internet traffic

Zack Mollusc
Go

Ok with me

I am totally fine with an ISP throttling my data connection, just so long as I am granted the reciprocal right to throttle the payments if I judge that am experiencing high cash contention at the time it arrives.

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SOULLESS machine-intelligence ROBOT cars to hit Blighty in 2015

Zack Mollusc

Re: can't wait

A huge beneficial side-effect of all this car-to-car communication is that the problem of different software and hardware and firmware versions from different vendors, all talking to each other swiftly and faultlessly will be solved.

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Stick a 4K in them: Super high-res TVs are DONE

Zack Mollusc
WTF?

Bandwidth caps?

How does streaming a 4K fillum not affect your download cap? Surely the bytes still have to get to the telly ? Why would storing the bytes before watching use more of your download cap than streaming the bytes?

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BBM beta comes to Windows Phone

Zack Mollusc
Windows

no apps

Imagine if all the parking meter attendants, petty beaurocrats, cold call salesmen, gatso camera operators, and all the other people who have blighted your existance for years got together and launched a mobile phone.

They may also think that the lack of apps is what is deterring you from giving them your money.

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The final score: Gramophones 1 – Glassholes 0

Zack Mollusc

Re: So right about the record player.

Oooooh, I shall. Thank you.

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Zack Mollusc

Re: So right about the record player.

I bought an N95 and much later an HTC One X precisely because the map data was built in and didn't need a data connection.

The N95 needed a software patch and this removed the map data.

The HTC One X had a patch pushed to it which removed the map data (or removed the app, can't remember).

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Zack Mollusc

Re: Admit it - You think it would be useful

Cyclists wearing Google Glass? Jeepers, aren't they satisfied with never looking behind them, they want to never bother to look what is in front of them?

They should lump bicycles in with mopeds, get some mirrors, indicators, number plates and protective clothing on them and have the bastards learn the traffic laws.

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The truth on the Navy carrier debacle? Industry got away with murder

Zack Mollusc

Perhaps the Harrier would be easier to fly if it had been developed over the decades?

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That AMAZING Windows comeback: Wow – 0.5% growth in 2015

Zack Mollusc

Re: What's to look forward to?

I quite liked the way you could load stuff into high memory.

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Use Tor or 'extremist' Tails Linux? Congrats, you're on an NSA list

Zack Mollusc

Official List of NSA Surveillance Targets:

Everyone, Everywhere, All the time.

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What's it like using the LG G smartwatch and Android Wear? Let us tell YOU

Zack Mollusc

Pfft

Phone case, £5

Epoxy resin £4

Glue case to sleeve/arm

Job done.

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Blame WWI, not Bin Laden, for NSA's post-9/11 intel suck

Zack Mollusc

Re: There's a big difference though

Methinks it was more on the lines of 'the government spies upon as many people as possible at any given moment', it is now possible to spy on almost everyone, hence almost everyone is spied upon.

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100% driverless Wonka-wagon toy cars? Oh Google, you're having a laugh

Zack Mollusc

Re: Great!

How on earth do drivers cause cyclists problems? The drivers in front of the cyclist are all receding into the distance, whilst the drivers behind the cyclist do not exist because cyclists have no mirrors and never take rear observation.

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Zack Mollusc

Re: I already posted about my skepticism in yesterday's Google-mobile thread...

They will be unnecessary in the UK then, as the proliferation of CCTV cameras has already eliminated Psychopaths, dickheads and mad cyclists.

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Zack Mollusc
Coat

Re: Are they hackable?

The car's black box will show that it suffered a sensor error and had to stop for safety's sake. Mine's the one on the LIDAR mast.

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Rap chap tapped for $3 BEELLION: Apple buys Dr Dre's Beats

Zack Mollusc

Re: Pffft! Idiots!

The same way streaming fits millions of tracks into a 500MB data allowance.

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Zack Mollusc

Pffft! Idiots!

I am working on an awesome new technology which will make streaming obsolete, it involves using some of the gigabytes of storage usually used for selfies and tracking cookies to instead store digitised music.

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Watch: Kids slam Apple as 'BORING, the whole thing is BORING'

Zack Mollusc

Re: Actually, I rather liked these kids

Hehehe, this hit a nerve with me. I have been using Win8.1 today and when I wanted to turn the thing off, I ended up ( after flailing around the desktop and swiping the corners of the screen etc ) opening a CLI box and eventually finding 'shutdown/s'.

Pro Tip: if you want to reboot, use shutdown/r

Tomorrow I might try and find a text editor.

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California gives green light to test self-driving cars on public roads

Zack Mollusc

Re: The logical next step

Modern cars are already full of computers and, although they do not get tired/distracted or upset, they manage to malfunction enough to make the car beyond economic repair.

Traffic jams and fuel usage _could_ be reduced by removing traffic lights, but corruption and bribery will keep them in place.

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Zack Mollusc

Re: Good

Highway patrol will love the new roadside tax opportunities offered by self-driving cars. New laws will spring up to catch out the JohnnyCabs and you will get fined for breaking the laws until it is time for you to pay for firmware updates to prevent them being broken.

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WTF is NET NEUTRALITY, anyway? And how can we make everything better?

Zack Mollusc

Hmmmm...

If there is difficulty in streaming video across the intarwebs, then perhaps it is time to design some kind of storage which can be filled slowly with video but then played back at full speed when all the video frames are in it.

I am thinking of a slowed-down vhs cassette recorder, but there may be an even better way of doing it.

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Watch out, Yahoo! EFF looses BADGER on sites that ignore Do Not Track

Zack Mollusc

Re: What do you want for free?

Meh, they can block me if they want. Let them find out how much their content is actually worth.

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Jack the RIPA: Blighty cops ignore law, retain innocents' comms data

Zack Mollusc

Misleading headline

Innocents' data is not retained. Any evidence which would show a defendant's innocence will be deleted/shredded/altered/mislaid.

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Facebook, you fools! Forget Oculus, you could have bought TRON-type headsets

Zack Mollusc

Surely, 'half as well as your phone'?

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Forget sledgehammers – crooks can CRACK ATMs with a TEXT

Zack Mollusc

As usual, things get crappier over time.

Earlier (running OS/2 on 200MHz cpus) ATMs had the computer inside the safe, next to the money.

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WHOA: Get a load of Asteroid DX110 JUST MISSING planet EARTH

Zack Mollusc

Mealtimes

How can you have your main meal in the middle of the day?

You have to clock out, leave the premises, queue up at the sarnie shop, eat your sarnie, get back to work and clock back in again within 45 minutes. The main meal is when you get home after work, at tea time, approximately six PM.

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Samsung brandishes quad-core Galaxy S5, hopes nobody wants high specs

Zack Mollusc

Re: Battery

The phone manufacturers choose to use the lowest-capacity battery they can get away with. They could put a battery in with four times the mass and four times the volume by simply making the phones a bit thicker. There is plenty of scope for making phones heavier, my keys weigh more than my phone.

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We nearly MISSED OUT on iOS7 redesign: But someone snatched Jony Ive from the jaws of quit

Zack Mollusc

Hot Piss!

You chaps actually use 'Reliant Robin'! Most people mistakenly say 'Robin Reliant'.

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HTC looks to cheaper phones as revenues wane

Zack Mollusc

Re: @ Zack

Thanks, Nathan, but I did leave it rebooting overnight to make the battery flat and then later in the week rebooting on charge overnight to give it full volts. Neither broke the cycle. Nor did presence/absence of sim card etc. Prising it open was the last resort and I did look at a how-to for that, but still broke the bloody thing.

:-)

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Zack Mollusc

I did know that there is a hard physical reset key combination on those phones, unfortunately it was unable to break the infinite boot cycle. There is also an emergency boot menu thing which was also unable to break the infinite boot cycle.

That is the problem with infinite boot cycles, you don't get to do much as it keeps booting every few seconds.

When the phone was 'working', I tried many times to choose a USB connection method which would let me mount the phone as a hard disk. Not possible.

Please give me more fruits of your immense wisdom and insight. I fully expect the following suggestions from you:

'Did you try waiting for it to finish booting?'

'Did you take it to the Apple Geniuses?'

'Did you pull the SD card out?'

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Japanese fanboi first in queue for, er, iPhone 6

Zack Mollusc

Re: erm

The 90's can drop dead, I have been making the crApple pun since the 80's.

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Zack Mollusc

Re: This is old news...

Can I be first in the queue to buy it on ebay for a ridiculous mark-up?

Failing that, can I be first in the queue to slag off the idiots who buy them on ebay for a ridiculous mark-up?

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Zack Mollusc

The iPhone 6 is yet another style-over-function exercise from crApple. Android will wipe the floor with it, technically, while kool-aid sipping fanbois will flock to it and send Apple's stock ever higher. Er.. something about needing to upgrade itunes..... er.....

Anyway, you get the idea. Everbody pile into the comments and get this flamewar over with, then when iPhone 6 is finally announced we can just link back to this article and save ourselves some time.

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'No, I CAN'T write code myself,' admits woman in charge of teaching our kids to code

Zack Mollusc
Coat

Re: I'll be reporting myself to HR in a few seconds

Surely 'Apparatchick'? Because she is female and attractive? Geddit?

Ok, I am going....

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