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* Posts by Ted Treen

1621 posts • joined 19 Apr 2007

Bank man: System's down, let's have coffee. Oh SNAP, where's all the CASH?

Ted Treen
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Flame

Banks???

Banks are now beginning to tell depositors that in the event of banks getting into trouble (i.e. found out), you have little claim on the money you thought was securely yours:- we've now changed the rules and you lent the money to us so you're just another unsecured creditor...

Management bonuses & pensions are no doubt, sacrosanct.

If fraudulent criminals are being attracted to the banks, is it not just a case of "Birds of a feather..."?

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Space-walker nearly OPENED HELMET to avoid DROWNING

Ted Treen
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Headmaster

Re: SPOILERS (@ Justin Stringfellow 21st August 2013 09:54)

@ Theodore:

How paradoxical: I think you might be facing a quandary...

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'Symbolic' Grauniad drive-smash was not just a storage fail

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Correction

" It was petty and stupid, the action of an ignorant and frightened bully...". Yep, that sounds like ANY government.

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iWatch rumours grow as Apple hires Nike fitness guru Jay Blahnik

Ted Treen
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Pint

Re: Image problems

It would be better if you drove someone else's car over him (maybe his own car):- plod wouldn't be nicking you then...

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Ted Treen
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FAIL

Re: The new Newton

"... the near-mythical iWatch, which Apple are hoping will rescue the firm..."

Near mythical because Apple (as usual) haven't commented one way or another: so this piece of incisive, riveting journalism is little more than a mishmash of internet rumours and speculation but presented as if it were an undeniable fact.

Let's wait until the fat lady sings...

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Screw you, Brits, says Google: We are ABOVE UK privacy law

Ted Treen
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Holmes

You got it...

Hackers, bankers etc. in fact virtually anyone who carries out actions which are legal here in the UK can still be handed over in chains to Uncle Sam so they can be incarcerated for the rest of their lives - if St. Barack deems it should be so.

Who said that the US of A no longer has arrogance and a belief in their superiority (unjustified - very unjustified) as national characteristics>

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Rate-my-boink app scores frisky fanbois, fangurlz' SCREAMS, VIBRATIONS

Ted Treen
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Coat

Re: @thesykes

My Grandad told me last night that he hadn't had sex since 1959...

Mind you, it was probably no great shakes, as it was only 2015 and we were in the pub by then...

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Blighty street has hottest Wi-Fi hotspot hottie in Europe: We reveal where

Ted Treen
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Childcatcher

Re: "but no hard sell and give-us-your-firstborn"

If your first-born has yet to reach the age of 21, I can say - from experience - that this would have been a very tempting offer...

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Kiwi jetpack gets all-clear for manned tests

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Hmmmm

Ad a few strings to tie people to or for them to cling to...

I think we've just seen Ryanair's next fleet...

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Fear the JOBZILLA! 150ft STATUE of Steve planned 'lest fanbois forget'

Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: Woop Woop Woop

@Pepper

OK, you're silly.

Very, very silly.

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Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Fascinating

"... destroying Apple computer..."???

Now that's what I call a reality distortion field.

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Samsung Mega 6.3: Enter the PHONDLESLAB

Ted Treen
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Alert

Re: Size Matters

"'standard definition' CRT screens"??

CRT SCREENS??

Are they still around in significant numbers?

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Ted Treen
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Coat

Big Tone...

...says no-one's touching him (well, not without asking).

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

Why in God's name...

...do people feel the need to be either ecstatic or excoriating?

I think it looks like a nice bit of kit which will suit some people admirably, and others less so.

I have an iPhone5 and I'm very happy with it - but I wouldn't (metaphorically) ram it down someone else's throat: everyone has the right to choose whatever suits them, and by whatever criteria they consider important. That's their right:- it's their money & their choice.

So, could we please cool it on the "If it's different to mine it's crap" juvenile comments?

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New blinged-up 'iPhone 5S' touted by Jobs FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE

Ted Treen
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Meh

Re: iPhone 5S? Yawn.

Correction:-

Yawn (plus I must tell everybody about it hoping it will make me look cool and a rugged individualist...)

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Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Maybe to you...

But the sheer numbers sold suggest they're getting something right.

Or do you know better?

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Web ad giant (Google) pops Adwords into Maps for iOS and Android

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Adverts on maps?

Ha! wait til you ask 'er indoors to fold it again...

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NSA gets burned by a sysadmin, decides to burn 90% of its sysadmins

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

"..."No one [at the NSA] has wilfully or knowingly disobeyed the law or tried to invade your civil liberties or privacies. There were no mistakes like that at all."..."

And there are fairies at the bottom my garden, Santa Claus is real, and The Tooth Fairy is coming tonight...

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PEAK iPAD: Slab looking a bit peaky, needs big biz to take more tablets

Ted Treen
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Trollface

Re: Again...

5 thumbs down by 14:17?

If the Cupertino company's description is valid, then there's a payload for them on the readership list of this article (or the list of those who have it read to them).

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Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Good god I'm no maths genius..

"...I can't believe someone has paid this analyst..."

He obviously puts the "anal" in analyst...

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Ted Treen
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Trollface

Again...

"...Cupertino idiot-tax operation..."

This is the stuff of Pulitzer prize winners, surely?

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Cameron demands Brits BOYCOTT angry-troll-infested websites

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

Re: It's always funny to watch someone try to control something

@xyz

"... I think politicans think..."

Sorry to disagree, old lad;- but I'm damned sure they don't!

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Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: When I were a lad....

Sounds more like Fotherington-Thomas (who is a GURL and reads 'chaterbox' chiz chiz)

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Ted Treen
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Holmes

All too true...

The whole of modern life seems to be a complete abnegation of personal responsibility

Naughty? it’s not your fault; you suffer from ADHD.

Fat/Obese? it’s all the fault of those evil fast-food merchants.

Unsuccessful in life? None of it is your fault (even if you ARE a lazy sod) – it’s your parents’/school’s/employer’s fault.

Can’t be arsed to think? Not your fault (see above) – the nice newspaperman will do it for you.

Also, many more examples, unfortunately, when any form of effort, responsibility or rational thought is called for.

But then, what do you expect from a populace reared on hand-outs, electoral bribes, and The Jeremy Kyle Show?

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Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Do I understand this? - P.S.

@The BigYin (again)

Q. "...Does this po-faced monkey-boy understand WTF he is talking about?.."

A. No - and neither does anyone else.

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Ted Treen
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Childcatcher

Re: Do I understand this?

@The BigYin

Whilst you're "thinking of the chillun" and banning things, would it be presumptuous to ask if you could ban Cameron, too?

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Ted Treen
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Devil

Fairly true...

...but you're overlooking that fact that Cameron is an utter twat - as are virtually all of his workmates - on both sides of the House.

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Ted Treen
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Headmaster

Hmmm

Populous - adjective - having a large population; densely populated.

Populace - noun - the people living in a particular country or area.

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So, you gonna foot this '$200bn' hacking bill, insurance giants asked

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Can they calculate realistic premiums?

Insurance companies are a part of the finance industry that's served us so admirably, unselfishly and altruistically over the last few decades...

Shame on those who suspect that the fine-print exclusions will basically mean "Whatever happens, we ain't paying out and your premiums will double next year".

Uberrima fides, anyone?

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Limbaugh: If you hate Apple then you're a lefty blog-o-twat hipster

Ted Treen
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Thumb Down

@ Phil O'Sophical

"...far too many of the users are total plonkers who can't see past the badge..."

That's a generalisation and as we all know, generalisations in general are wrong.

It's true to say that many of the users are people who find OSX preferable to Windows. It's their choice. Yes, I know some richardheads who use Macs: but I know a lot more Windows users who I don't think should be allowed out without their nurse.

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Tor servers vanish as FBI swoops on kiddie-smut suspect

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Is Tor really secure?

@Andy Prough

"...the government spook agencies and probably some criminal outfits [is there a difference?]..."

No.

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South Korea: We're 'concerned' that Obama saved Apple from ban

Ted Treen
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Holmes

Like many things....

Patent law is a good (theoretical) concept - but a damned awful implementation;- although almost anything which involves Lawyers is pretty dire.

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NSA security award winner calls for hearings into agency's conduct

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: What goes around, comes around...

@ Brian Miller

You appear to have not quite grasped the point I was making:- In the 50's & 60's our governments were engaged in a confrontation with the 'non-democratic' dictatorial regimes of the Eastern Bloc.

We saw right through the Eastern Bloc's propaganda concerning imaginary imminent threats from the west, and how their draconian powers were to protect their own populace from the terrible Westerners...

I just see the irony of the NSA and our own GCHQ etc. taking the same line now...

I accept our ballot boxes work as a means of counting votes; it's our system of so-called democracy which denigrates our votes into a meaningless charade...

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Ted Treen
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Big Brother

What goes around, comes around...

Back in 1965, how we laughed when we heard the East Germans claim the Berlin Wall was to keep westerners out, for the safety & security of the Ostis (East Germans).

How we laughed when we heard the East Germans claim the armed Grenzepolizei (Border Guards/Police) were to keep westerners out, for the safety & security of the Ostis.

"How naive they must be", we thought "to swallow such drivel. Surely they can see they are not at all free and totally controlled?"

What do we hear from pour own "authorities" 50 years on?

"It's necessary to defeat terrorism".

"If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear".

Rather ironic, isn't it?

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PEAK APPLE: iPad market share hits the skids

Ted Treen
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Pint

I hates titles!

Instead of gloating adolescent schadenfreude (gotta look cool, man!), here we have a logical, rational, sensible and very well expressed comment.

What the hell are you doing at El Reg? Anyway - have a beer (& an up vote).

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Banknote campaigner's Twitter rape threats ordeal: Bloke, 21, cuffed

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

Re: No problem with a woman being on a note

Why should it?

I rarely get too see many of my banknotes:- SWMBO has usually sequestrated them, so a woman on banknotes seems apposite...

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'Fat Wallet Bob' leaves Apple tech chief spot for Special Projects Bureau

Ted Treen
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Thumb Up

Re: He's been trying to retire since June last year.

I also endorse Steve's (rational) comment. You beat me to the description of the down voter, as well...

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Comrade! If you dare f$%^ing swear on the internet, WE'LL SHOOT

Ted Treen
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WTF?

Дерьмо

Какое a нагрузки шариков.

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For pity's sake: DON'T MOVE to the COUNTRY if you want to live

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: How to survive in the countryside

"I'd like to know how a pedestrian walking at 3mph can die from suddenly decelerating."

Unlikely - but possibly from decelerating from 3mph to 0mph when walking into a brick wall or similar, and the skull takes most of the impact. However, any motorist/motorcyclist travelling at say 50mph faces a rapid deceleration, whether or not they hit a tree or another vehicle or whatever.

This can have a somewhat deleterious effect upon human liveware...

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WAR ON PORN: UK flicks switch on 'I am a pervert' web filters

Ted Treen
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Pint

Re: The opt-out form has been leaked

More than pretty funny:- it's excellent!

Wish I could send beer to the author/authoress (delete as appropriate)

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Ted Treen
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Headmaster

Re: AC@21:41 & John Smith

Agreed with both of you: but the removal of any form of personal responsibility - due to all politicos following the "bread & circuses" approach (aka bribery) has led to a dumbed-down populace who look to someone else to provide for them and do everything for them. OK, not everyone - but a frighteningly high percentage which is getting higher all the time.

All parties think "Give the plebs (i.e. us) something to distract them & keep them quiet, then they won't interfere with our agenda: taking all their money & making ourselves filthy rich..."

This infantilisation degrades and could ultimately remove the human spirit.

I know it's SciFi, but think "The Matrix":- it's the final endpoint of such a strategy...

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UK gov's smart meter dream unplugged: A 'colossal waste of cash'

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

Too many words...

"UK gov: A 'colossal waste of cash'

There. Fixed it for you

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Why data storage technology is pretty much PERFECT

Ted Treen
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Thank you

An excellent article - which is how the Reg used to be all the time.

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Rap for rap chap in crap rap app flap: Jay-Z blasted by privacy bods

Ted Treen
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Coat

Easy

Just download the app by Jay-Z's lesser-known brother, Ctrl-Z, and all will be undone...

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PRISM scandal: Brit spooks operated within the law, say politicos

Ted Treen
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Flame

I wonder...

Would these be the same MPs who thought that charging the taxpayer (i.e. us) for their hanging baskets, bog seats, and rent paid to lovers etc. was also legal, above board & honest?

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From Russia with no love: Prez Putin dubs Ed Snowden 'unwanted gift'

Ted Treen
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Holmes

Hardly surprising...

Vlad won't really want to display as a hero (and example) someone who tells Joe Public what nasty illegal spying is inflicted upon them by their own government...

...even if it does embarrass the wicked fascist exploiters of the people...

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PM writes ISPs' web filter ads for them - and it must say 'default on'

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Welcome to the Brave New World...

"...What next? blocking political comments the government dont like??..."

Sole purpose of exercise, old lad.

Disguised as them having some concern for us election-fodder. As if...

Preposterous idea...

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Ted Treen
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Devil

Corrections...

"...Tory leader David Cameron..."

He's not a Tory

and

he's no leader...

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Fanbois get Outlook app for iOS, but only if they sign up for Office 365

Ted Treen
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Thumb Down

Translation...

"..."Our goal is to help our customers remain productive anytime, anywhere..."

Productive, that is, for Redmond's cash-flow...

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