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* Posts by Ted Treen

1613 posts • joined 19 Apr 2007

European Space Agency: PLATO will seek out 'ADVANCED LIFE forms'... 'SLIME'

Ted Treen
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Alien

No need...

...to go that far.

"...survey of nearby planets for indications from advanced life forms (as well as slime)..."

A survey of this planet would show some pretty advanced life forms, and if they checked in local and national government offices all around the planet, they'd find the semi-intelligent slime.

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Help! Apple has snaffled the WHOLE WORLD'S supply of sapphire glass

Ted Treen
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Clear objective unbiased reporting...

"...hampered by Cupertino's greed..."

Nothing to do with a company ensuring it has the supplies/raw materials it anticipates needing over the next three years. Do companies apologise for a shortage of product saying "We could have got the materials we needed, but we thought it fairer to order insufficient for our needs so every one of our competitors could also have some"?

It appears that that's the way to go if:-

a) It's Jasper writing

and

b) It's Apple he's writing about.

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Facebook pays $19bn for WhatsApp. Yep. $45 for YOUR phone book

Ted Treen
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Happy

Speak for yourself...

"...The biggest idiot today isn't Facebook. It's us..."

Not if you never had, currently don't have, and never will have a Facebook account or presence.

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Facebook gobbles WhatsApp for SIXTEEN BILLION DOLLARS

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Auntie Beeb...

...informed me of this late yesterday evening by sending a message to my 'phone which read;-

"Facebook pays $16bn (£9.6bn) for what Mark Zuckerberg calls 'incredibly valuable' WhatsApp massaging service".

They issued a correction 27 mins later, but I prefer the original output.

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HP 'KNEW' about Autonomy's hardware sales BEFORE the whistle blew: report

Ted Treen
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HP knew...

"HP knew about Autonomy's hardware and reseller sales long before a whistleblower pointed them out and the company wrote down its acquisition by $8.8bn, the Financial Times has claimed"

Colour me unsurprised...

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Apple pushes back release date for 'dustbin chic' Mac Pro

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Don't want it. Don't need it.

"Don't want it. Don't need it."

Then don't buy it - or are you just trying to show how superior you are"

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

Whoa, Tel

Sloppy writing?

It's Jasper, innit?

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North Korea to switch on the interwebs

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: "[N]othing is ever straightforward"

@I ain't Spartacus

"...What you can't do, is dance to their tune..."

Quite correct; there's a name for doing so: appeasement.

Lots of us Brits remember last time we tried appeasement on a large scale.

Munich 1938.

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Apple's Hacker Princess dumps fruity firm for Elon Musk's Tesla

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

"fruity firm"

Can we all club together to buy Jasper a new cliché for his birthday?

This one's a little past its 'sell by' date.

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Apple in bid to turn MORE and MORE humans into iPhone-stroking fanbois

Ted Treen
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Coat

Re: Bombproof

@Heisenberg...

You're fomenting uncertainty again.

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Friends don't do tech support for friends running Windows XP

Ted Treen
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Coat

@xperroni

"...a replacement notebook for the wife..."

Seems like a fair trade...

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Time to pack in your job: Someone FINALLY needs a cat vids curator

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Choices choices choices

"...won't have to look/behave like a twunt working for Apple..."

Nope! Just carry on being one writing guff like this.

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'I plead guilty to DDoS conspiracy and these GCHQ b*stards were doing the SAME thing?'

Ted Treen
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Happy

Ha!

There is a delicious irony in the biter being bit...

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Google will dodge EU MONSTER FINES by 'promoting' rival search services

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Ye Gods!

Who agreed this?

Dave Hartnett?

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Elderly Bletchley Park volunteer sacked for showing Colossus exhibit to visitors

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Pournelle's Iron Law

Iron Law of Bureaucracy

In any bureaucracy, the people devoted to the benefit of the bureaucracy itself always get in control and those dedicated to the goals the bureaucracy is supposed to accomplish have less and less influence, and sometimes are eliminated entirely.

Sums it all up rather well, doesn't it?

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Apple's Tim Cook: Fear not, worried investors, new product salvation is 'absolutely' on the way

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Blimey...

"The world has indeed gone mad."

Not all of it:- only those who give any import or credence to the jabberings of analysts...

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Ted Treen
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Alert

Re: High end "smartphone" market is mature

Indeed, Sir:- bad news of that sort pertaining to my earnings/bank account would be most welcome.

Analysts are the bad news in this scenario; I cannot understand how they manage to persuade someone to part with oodles of money to them, giving in return 'guesses' that are about as reasoned and accurate as those coming from a seaside fortune-teller.

As regards Tim Cook:-

'"We're working on things that you see that we're shipping today, but we're [also] working on things that are not," Cook told analysts and reporters'

In other words, Apple is continuing to operate just as it always has by not announcing work in progress or future projects. Why the hell should they happily inform their competitors what's in the pipeline?

If a few cretinous analysts end up with egg on their faces, and some greedy speculators/gamblers get their fingers burned, who gives a damn?

Before all the anti-Apple brigade down vote this, I would sal that the foregoing applies to any technology company.

Perhaps a cull of analysts & speculators could be a new team sport?

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Stephen Fry rewrites computer history again: This time it's serious

Ted Treen
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Pirate

Re: Why let truth get in the way...

Nothing wrong with internment camps - as long as the right people* are interned...

*Politicos, senior civil servants, senior bankers etc. etc.

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Apple’s Mac turns 30: How Steve Jobs’ baby took its first steps

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Powerbook 170

Not so!

"...a Mac with a BUILT-IN floppy drive - rare as hens' teeth these days..." - Correct.

But get a Mac WITHOUT a built-in floppy drive, attach a USB floppy drive (Circa £7.00) et voila..

Not exactly rocket science

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

@ukgnome

"Doesn't the OS look just like windows?"

Maybe so - but that was in the days when Windows looked like nothing on earth (Win 3.1) and it wasn't until Windows 95 that Microsoft had begun to look more like Apple (but without the fluid functionality).

So it would be more appropriate to ask "Doesn't the OS look just like the Windows of the future?"

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Ted Treen
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Re: Floppy Eject

@Ben Rose

They don't do it the way I want to do it so I hate them with a vengeance and issue a fatwah on all their products.

Obviously the kind of rational, reasoning purchaser every supplier yearns for...

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HP sticks thumb in Microsoft's eye, extends Windows 7 option for new machines

Ted Treen
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Thumb Up

Re: 8.1's not bad

I'm a veteran Mac user - so I'll mostly sit on the fence re Windows:- I run a virtual machine with Windows 7 and I have tried Win8 elsewhere but wasn't too keen so I stayed with my VM on 7.

My real point is to agree whole-heartedly with you about trackpads: I don't care if it's by Apple, Sony or HP - give me an honest-to-goudness mouse any time.

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Amazon workers in Delaware reject trade union membership

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

Re: UNIONS

Unfortunately many of the posts on this forum are a perfect example of macrocosm in microcosm, with the entrenched almost extremist attitudes shown regarding Unions & Management.

There are (as usual) good and bad in both, like it or not.

For every bolshie, closet-marxist megalomaniac McCluskey there is a corresponding diametrically-opposed manager of the Goodwin or Murdoch persuasion. Neither are nice (or good) people.

There are many examples of good management and of bad or ineffectual management - similarly there are examples of good union pressure and also of disastrous union intransigence.

As reported by AC 16 Jan 19:29, in my home town of Wolverhampton, a major employer, Goodyear Tyres, attempted to bring in productivity agreements which were far from drastic, but intransigent union politico-neanderthals intervened with the result that the plant closed, with the jobs 'exported'. I also accept that the weak and corrupt (allegedly for the benefit of any of m'learned friends reading this) management at Leyland Cars contributed enormously to the company's demise.

The best answer is to overcome entrenched historical prejudices, to realise that working together rather than in opposition, is bound to produce mutual benefit to both sides: let's hope that sooner rather than later, common sense will emerge and perhaps our industries can once again become industrious.

Looking at our leaders, though;- I won't hold my breath...

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Even 'Your computer has a virus' cold-call gits are migrating off XP

Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: Are there no prisons?

A referee's whistle, blown as hard as you can right by the telephone mouthpiece, has proved to a good deterrent to these scum.

I gather it can be rather excruciating to be on the receiving end...

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Modern spying 101: How NSA bugs Chinese PCs with tiny USB radios - NYT

Ted Treen
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Pirate

@T. F. M. Reader

Not just the Chinese military:-

"Frequent targets of the uber-snoop tech include the Chinese Army, along with Russian military networks, trade institutes within the European Union, systems used by Mexican police and drug cartels, and folk in Saudi Arabia, India, and Pakistan."

In other words, pretty much of the rest of the world. And I thought "Team America: World Police" was satire...

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BT banks on ex-HSBC man to take charge of Openreach biz

Ted Treen
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Thumb Down

Re: Oh, really? @Phil W

I'll take your point - but I won't give HSBC any right to any moral high ground for at least the US authorities had a go at them for laundering drug/terrorist money, and they offered Swiss accounts to UK residents deliberately trying to hide money from HMRC: oh, the list is endless...

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Ted Treen
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Unhappy

Oh, really?

"...he helped steer the bank through the financial crisis..."

Would that be the same financial crisis he helped the bank create?

And then "steered it through" by getting bailed out by the rest of us non-bankers?

Without us having any say in the matter.

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Foot-loving cat burglar nicks THREE THOUSAND individual socks

Ted Treen
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: But.. what does this say about the underwear?

Another keyboard, please.

My cat will be round to collect it shortly.

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Apple fails to shake antitrust watchdog loose, receives judge slapdown

Ted Treen
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Go

Re: ... hardly surprising that "lawyers get paid a lot of money".

"...I've now lost the will to do anything good and creative in my life..."

Then you're at least halfway qualified to be a lawyer.

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Slovenian jailed for creating code behind 12 MILLION strong 'Mariposa' botnet army

Ted Treen
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Coat

Re: Future historians and Windows era...

I'm a time traveller:-

in the past 24 hours I've gone from yesterday into today: and in another few hours I'll segue into tomorrow.

:-)

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Britain's costliest mistake? Lord Stern defends his climate maths

Ted Treen
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Happy

That's more like it...

Seasoned, rational, well-thought out and well expressed discourse.

I don't agree with all commenters, but I whole-heartedly commend them for the intelligence and reason shown.

How the Reg used to be - with the "Yar Boo Sucks" name-calling element conspicuous by its (relative) absence.

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Ted Treen
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Childcatcher

Re: my earlier post:- 30/12/13 @ 17:47

Hmmm... 12 thumbs down.

Since I made no comment, either for or against the Global Warming theories, but just pointed out that the number of proponents does not change the veracity or validity of the argument, then I just suppose that there are many commenters who perhaps:-

fail in English comprehension

or

viscerally react without due consideration

or

actually believe that if you get more people onside, it somehow proves your argument.

or

any permutation of several or all of the above.

Nice to see reasoned discourse still rules...

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: one small problem : "both halves of the debate"

"There are two factions, one of which outnumbers the other by about 99 to 1. The views do not hold equal weight, however much you might wish otherwise."

There was a time when those who believed the Earth (and a flat Earth at that) to be the centre of the Universe outnumbered the others by 999 to 1.

The number of adherents does not in itself give credence to any particular philosophy.

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Coming in 2014: Scary super-soldier exoskeleton suits from the US military

Ted Treen
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Unhappy

But...

...what happens if a grunt gets fired upon, pees himself and shorts out?

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Gay hero super-boffin Turing 'may have been murdered by MI5'

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: New Inquiry.

...and which rabidly anti-gay organs of the state are to be investigated over the 1327 death of Edward II, reputedly killed by having a red hot poker rammed up his anus?

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Macbook webcams CAN spy on you - and you simply CAN'T TELL

Ted Treen
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There ain't no foolproof any more...

Whatever a software technician can produce, another of equal or greater skill/knowledge can usually find a way around. Almost any 'security' these days really means 'It's offered security up to now - as far as we know'.

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Why UK.gov's £1.2bn fibre broadband rollout is a bumbling FLOP

Ted Treen
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Re: Imagine the chaos

...Why UK.gov's £1.2bn fibre broadband rollout is a bumbling FLOP...

The phrase "UK gov" is a pretty big clue to the reason for the phrase "bumbling FLOP".

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Former US POLITICIAN gets 6 years in slammer for FACEBOOK SCAM

Ted Treen
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Re: biggest Ponzi scam of all:- National Insurance?

Nice defence;- but not quite true.

Like many governmental schemes over the years, what is now viewed by the authorities as general taxation was originally set up for a specific purpose:- your vehicle tax disc was called a "Road Fund Licence" for many years after it ceased having anything to do with just road building & maintenance.

So NI (or National Insurance - the clue's in the name) was originally set up to provide very basic social security benefits for which you paid a premium.

Then some 'bright spark' thought that these funds can just be added to general tax funds instead of ring-fencing them for their intended purpose with the idea that we'll let future taxpayers worry about paying the entitlements to those who've compulsorily invested.

Result? Unfunded pension liabilities, massive increases for higher-echelon civil servants, and smaller benefits for original investors with start dates deferred way beyond the original 'contractual date'.

On the basis of "If it walks like a duck, looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck then it's probably a duck', National Insurance has turned out to be a Ponzi scheme.

And no amount of politico-speak, equivocation or sophistry will convince me otherwise.

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Ted Treen
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So when do our politicos in the UK face doing porridge for the biggest Ponzi scam of all:- National Insurance?

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Apple CEO Cook breaks YEARS OF SILENCE, finally speaks to El Reg hack

Ted Treen
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Coat

Re: don't mess with baldness.

OK: keep your hair on...

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Is Google prepping an ARMY of WALKING ROBOTS?

Ted Treen
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Re: There is nothing evil about the military

Yes:- the old description - Lions led by donkeys - is as apt today as it was in the Crimean War, and pretty much any & every conflict since then.

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Nominet seeks royal approval for pisspoor .uk domain name push

Ted Treen
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Re: Just me, or what?

No, it's not just you, Pete. That was my first take, too.

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Brilliant Brit bloke builds breakfast-belching BACON DRONE

Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: Excellent...

...such as the black pudding (or bubble)...

My Full English has both black pudding and bubble, and also a round or two of fried bread.

Ambrosia!

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Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: I had wondered what this guy had got up to...

Ditto. I have been following rather good.com for several years now, and have subscribed to Joel's newsletters.

Far more intelligent and entertaining than most of the dross on the TV/MSM/Interwebs...

Good man, Joel:- more brown sauce to your bacon!

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Apple's GOLDEN BLING MOBE still the top selling US handset

Ted Treen
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@Oh Homer...Re: Total lack of any actual numbers noted

Pure sophistry.

Try comparing like with like:- unless you think Ferrari are finished, because they're totally outsold by entry-level models from Kia & Hyundai inter alia

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US military's RAY-GUN truck BLASTS DRONES, mortars OUT OF THE SKY

Ted Treen
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Happy

@Nicho - Re: Reflective Shell ?

"There was a dude called Newton who did some work a while back on action and reaction. You should check it out."

Yup.

To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

This can be proved by punching a Millwall supporter...

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Ted Treen
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Ca dépend…

Depending on which wildlife you feed (gators?)...

...and who you feed to 'em...

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Apple iWatch due in October 2014, to wirelessly charge from one metre away – report

Ted Treen
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Re: One meter charging is a bit more useful

Little perforations??

I await a patent lawsuit filed by the Tetley Teafolk...

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How Britain could have invented the iPhone: And how the Quangocracy cocked it up

Ted Treen
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Boffin

@DaneB

Indeed Sir, Cameron & Osborne are particularly repellent examples of humanity, BUT...

Their being repellent does not automatically preclude Labour from being more than somewhat dense. Furthermore, a statement describing Labour as extremely lacking in the brightness department is in no way indicative of an endorsement of the other lot.

In my (not so) humble opinion, the whole bunch of 'em are utter and total arseholes, and I know many other people of the same opinion.

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

To be expected:

The excellent Jerry Pournelle described this in his Iron Law of Bureaucracy:-

In any bureaucracy, the people devoted to the benefit of the bureaucracy itself always get in control and those dedicated to the goals the bureaucracy is supposed to accomplish have less and less influence, and sometimes are eliminated entirely.

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