@John Smith

<"There was a black helicopter brigade, though, who liked to think that all calls were centrally monitored for key words"

They were partly right. I think Duncan Campbell did a series of articles on this in the New Statesman.>

I hope so:-

For quite some time now I have readily sprinkled my emails, text messages and phone calls with (what I presume to be) suspect key words just for the sheer hell of it...

Anything to annoy our 2nd-Home Secretary...

@Adrian Esdaile

Aussies always have to go one up on us Poms.....

Now Ade's claiming that Aussie politicos are tighter & dumber than ours.

Sorry mate - once you've seen Harridan Harperson, Reichsfuhrer Schmidt, Wee Gordie, etc., you realise ours really are the ultimate pits.

Although you could have been in with a chance, if you hadn't sent us the gorgeous, pouting Patricia Hewitt...

@Anon. Coward-Friday 13 12:54 GMT

"Politicians are like the nobility of old, just another untouchable elite."

Not quite true, old lad.

I think you will find that a little over two hundred years ago, some excitable little froggies, together with Dr Guillotin's fun invention, managed to "touch" quite a few of their Aristo elite.

Not that I'm suggesting that we view them as role models, of course.

Oh sod it. I'll tell the truth. That's EXACTLY what I'm siggesting...

Not surprised...

So, "The maximum sentence for burglary in a building other than a dwelling is ten years' imprisonment. ".

But if some spaced-out little lowlife breaks into & trashes my place, which would terrorise my pets & leave the family feeling completely violated, said lowlife would now attract just a caution.

It really is time we planned the barricades and sought the AKs...

Ah - Libel...

...the peculiarly British laws which enable unprincipled lawyers (if that's not tautology) - eg Peter Carter Ruck - to effectively win the lottery several times a year, by ensuring the generally ungodly - Maxwell, anyone? - to deny freedom of speech to any other citizen, and even those of another country.

Fortunately the latter usually use the famous Pressdram (Private Eye) response when dealing with these parasites.

Is it any surprise that Parliament is stuffed full of unsuccessful/mediocre lawyers?

@benito darder oliver

Carry on baiting.....

You're a master.

The REAL blame....

Of course the fact that sterling has been devalued by over 25% against the almighty US$ has to be Apple's fault in the minds (and I use the word VERY loosely) of the trolls of the anti-Mac brigade. But I suppose that complex issues like international finance and reality are really a little too much for them.

If they can swallow Microsoft's guff re Windows, then I suppose that they're dumb enough to believe that Brown is fiscally prudent, Darling is totally independent and it all started in America, anyway.

Alien - to symbolise the fact that rational thought (rather than inarticulate prejudice) is a concept which is alien to most of 'em...

Cue vitriolic (and probably ungrammatical) diatribe....

Ihre Papieren...

Widerstand ist zwecklos: Sie werden assimiliert!

(Signed)

Obersturmbahnfuhrer J Schmidt

2nd-Home Secretary

@TV Licensing

Won't the TV Licensing authorities in the UK love it:- They'll argue that you're receiving broadcasts therefore every iphone (and any others so blessed) must have a licence. Ker-ching! & trebles all round...

I MUST get this........

....I have absolutely nothing nefarious or confidential to say, but the thought of really, really upsetting "Expenses" Smith and "Veto" Straw is just too delicious to miss...

@Aaron Singh

"Steve represents the Music industry in general (with iTunes and the like) , Evil Steve = Evil Music Industry"

Utter tosh, old lad.

You DO however, get the prize for the biggest load of absolute bollocks so far this year.

Well done/

@ David Neil

Raping your natural resources?

Utter rubbish: we never shagged the highland cattle; that was the Vikings.

You only have to look at present day Scots to see the proof...

Purpose.......

And of course they know full well that any "real" terrorist isn't out to get Joe Soap, but has his beady eyes set on those in authority.

And those in authority know equally well that Joe Soap wouldn't be exactly inconsolable were it to happen successfully...

"No Officer, I never saw nuffink, and I didn't hear nuffink, either. What? - the entire cabinet wiped out? Oh well, mustn't grumble, worse things happen at sea....."

Backroom Boys

At least SOME of the blame must go to the Legal Leeches who encouraged this action.......

Long Memory......

ALL Labour Governments end in a financial crisis - earning some nasty names for the Tories, who come to power and have to administer nasty medicine to cure the mess left by the departed Labour.

The cycle repeats, as the general population has too short an attention span to notice this, and too little understanding to care.

Alien - 'cos that's what NuLab are

Digital engagement......

To the current gummint, I offer but one digit:- the one next to my index finger.

They may engage with it how they like.

History lesson...

In the words of the esteemed Ms Rice-Davis (Google it, youngsters) "He would say that, wouldn't he?"

Paris: Following on from Mandy, but not as honest...

Don't need genealogy...

Obviously the Met emplos the bastard love child of Whacky Jacqui & Lord Mandelson......

Are you sure?

A British court? A sensible decision? A victory for the individual vs a thieving multinational?

It's not April 1st, is it?

STBO

Having seen newsreel of Parisian drivers, I concur that it's obviously the Froggies' fault,

Paris, as 1) The name and 2) She knows a lot about seamen...

@AC 20:59 13th February 2009

" Labour MP Keith Vaz has no idea how the Amazon marketplace works."

Too much information old son.

Just say "" Labour MP Keith Vaz has no idea."

See? More succinct yet (even more) accurate.

Not quite right.

"....recent tabloid reports have suggested that economic hardship really does lead to a global downturn between the sheets...."

Then the reports are wrong, Lester old son. We have ALL been given a right royal rogering by the banks, and they are continuing to do so and will continue further, with the current inefectual regime in place.

Paris - 'cos she's best between the sheets, when it comes to the crunch.

@Enrico, A J, & Julian

Can't really think of anything to add - between you, you've said it all - other than Brown's billions "hidden" off-balance sheet in PFI schemes will now come back to haunt him . I hope he'll be haunted to death: political death, that is.

@Stevie

I fixed my sawtooth G4, swapped PSU (only as I needed more power), CPU, added all sorts of drives with no trouble whatsoever.

Obviously there were screws loose somewhere when you were doing the job...

Good idea, but...

Anyone think of any NuLab-commissioned "Independent Review" (Hutton etc.,) which has:-

a) been independent

or

b) disagreed with NuLab's politburo?

No?"

Thought not.

@Bitsucker

Bit late to say it's not far-fetched, old chap

22 September, 2005

"A girl was arrested for wearing her "Bollocks to Blair" T-shirt at the Midlands Game Fair last weekend. Charlotte Denis, 20, a gamekeeper from Gloucestershire, was stopped by police as she left the Countryside Alliance stand because of the "offensive" slogan."

See www.horseandhound.co.uk/competitionnews/392/68779.html or use Google.

Thoughtcrime is with us, my children.

Be afraid.

Be very, very afraid

@AC 13:27

Nice thinking, old lad - but basically bollocks.

As a baby boomer myself (January 1950 vintage) with a son born Feb 1986 - who was, and still is, one of my best friends, I have noted that complaisance AND complacence are more prevalent amongst the young than amongst us wrinklies.

Having a lot of friends in the age group 18-65, I can confirm that the abhorrence of, and mistrust of NuLab and especially Whacky Jacqui appears to be in direct proportion to one's age.

I assume that you are a comparitive youngster.

@Mike Richards

Mike - stand at the next election & I'll vote for you.

Hell, I'll even manage your campaign...

Very strange...

...but why?

doesn't Oz have native/feral/racing pigeons of their own?

No doubt someone will lighten my darkness...

Goose & Gander???

Microsoft want to pursue "..unscrupulous traders".

Can I pursue "...unscrupulous companies..." who want to charge me a higher price than elsewhere in the world, for the same product?

Possibly???

Co-op to replace the current government?

@Wonderkid

No-one's disputing climate change. It's as natural as sunrise, and it's recurrence is equally as natural.

What is being disputed now is whether human activity is quite as responsible as has previously been claimed.

And as for vested interests, Fatty Brown & around a zillion other inadequates throughout the entire world have thought "Whoopeee! A cool-sounding reason to screw even more out of the plebs!"

They won't give that up without a fight...

Ted

BA, MA & PHD in Applied Cynicsm

Boris for PM!

At least ONE politician...

a) has gonads

b) sees through the crap

c) still seems to have common sense.

Boris for PM.

NOW!

No time for scadenfreude

No-one's immune from the effects of incompetent politicos and rapacious bankers. Every layoff is a tragedy for the person involved. My sympathies to them - but maybe some of them might find a welcome in Cupertino, perhaps?

@Brutus

Balance from the Beeb???

BALANCE FROM THE BEEB??????

Not in a month of Sundays, old son.

Unless of course, your idea of balance is to have the permanent smug, self-satisfied arrogance of the middle-class self-proclaimed "intellectual liberal" - who invariably show all the intellectual characteristics of a turnip coupled with the liberality of the SS - pretty much the same as the utterly useless shower who cynically but successfully (so far) describe themselves as a "Labour" movement.

Sorry for the (slight) digression but the terms "Balance" and "Beeb" are mutually exclusive.

You fools......

Now you've cracked it, AND published the results, this means that Lester won't be around for the next 42 days.....

Mine's the one with the "I want an ID card" on the frone, and "Whacky Jacqui rules" on the back. (This is no time to be making enemies...)

Cut through the crap...

<Incandescent with rage>

OK, Mr McKinnon's been a bit of a naughty boy:- but he did it in the UK.

The really frightening thing is the supine attitude of the UK establishment in their desire to kneel down and present their rear to Uncle Sam - and allow a UK citizen to be hi-jacked by a foreign government to face a draconian punishment for a bit of silliness which a) brought him no personal gain, and b) was permitted by the unbelievably hopeless approach to system security by the US mliitary/gov't. and c) would bring but a mild rebuke in a UK court.

If I complained to UK plod that my house had been burgled, and I'd either left the door unlocked or the key under the mat, plod would be even less inclined to assist (I wouldn't hold my breath, anyway) and my insurance company would say "Bugger Off!". The same should be held to apply to Uncle Sam & his sysadmins/system architects. They could be labeled "US" with very good cause.

What is happening is a gross abuse of the system and McKinnon's rights as a UK citizen (and I abhor Cherie Blair's Human Rights Act) but this is beyond the pale.

All this to placate Bush & to get Tony his little medals - oh, and his £15Million pa income, of course.

Ain't socialism grand!

If the means existed to defend McKinnon by armed intervention, it would be a course with which I might wholeheartedly sympathize, but I shouldn't say so as I'm certain Obersturmbahnfuhrer Smith's goons trawl El Reg regularly (those that can read, that is) looking for dangerous subversive dissenters.

Paranoid?

Damn right, since 1997 - and getting more so each year, as there's even more reason so to be, each year.

</Incandescent with rage>

I wonder.....

....which will come first?

Election, or insurrection?

I am beginning to believe this shower could cause even the normally politically apathetic British public to decide that enough is enough.

Mine's the one with the inflatable barricades in the pockets.

@Paul M

Wonderful suggestion, old chap!

I heartily concur.

@AC 12.36

Detail from Mac Disk Utility:-

"Writing data over the data 7 times meets the U.S. Department of Defense (DoD) 5220-22-M standard for securely erasing magnetic media."

I haven't troubled myself to check out the standard, but with all the paranoia associated with the military - especially since the inception of the DoHS, I reckon it's probably safe enough for general use.

A little knowledge....

is truly a dangerous thing.

When I sold ultra-scsi drives from my Mac (yes, on eBay) I used the Mac's disk utility for a 7-pass overwrite on each drive. Left it running overnight as it's a loo-oo-oong job.

I suppose the well-funded spook fraternity just might have been able to glean some info from it (Whacqui's lads strike me as not having the competence) if they really, really, really wanted to.

I believe it is sufficiently secure to satisfy all but the most paranoid/obsessive - but if not, there's always the 35-pass overwrite, but that takes an eternity. Good option if you believe you have black helicopters in your belfry, though.

@AC 16:23

Nope, I'm not going to rise to your baiting -

i wouldn't even describe you as a retard:- just someone who, IMHO, is incorrect.

You have EVERY right to your own point of view - irrespective of how wrong it is.

PS

Keep up the baiting - you're a master!

OK, coat is being fetched.....

Wait for.....

...the surfeit of schadenfreude from tiny minds who would revel in someone else's misfortune.

There are many people with whom I would disagree politically, sociologically, economically, computationally(?) and just generally.

That said, I would not wish misfortune or ill-health upon them.

Hope you're soon fit again, Steve.

and the truth is.....

Whilst I am no great fan of Microsoft - OSX rules for me - I have seen too many cases of "security alerts" threatening us with a plague of locusts, or the death of every first-born in the nation, or at least a visit from the four horsemen of the apocalypse.

I am, therefore, minded to accept Microsoft's "downplaying" of this as being a more realistic assessment.

With all of the adverse publicity associated with ANY security threat - extant or hypothetical - I cannot see MS indulging in such a blatant porkie which would obviously be found out very quickly.

Not even Mr Ballmer.

Speaking of whom, is it just me who wonders whether he is the long-lost (or disowned) brother of Uncle Fester from the Adams Family? The resemblance is too great to be co-incidental.

Unsurprising

This despicable shower - in common with ALL previous Labour governments - have an innate hostility to the armed forces, and utter contempt for the idea of equipping them effectively and properly.

Since Labour was effectively hi-jacked in the late 1920's/early 1930's by self-proclaimed "intellectuals" almost invariably hailing from the upper middle & middle classes, they have had no compunction about using HM Forces as an instrument for their self-aggrandisement and arrogance - in much the same way Oberscharfuhrer Smith (and NuLab predecessors) are making use of HM Plod to keep the rest of us in our places and dissent-free.

It is a constant surprise that there are sufficient sheeple around to give The Supreme Leader the thumbs up, whereas anyone with the capacity to look around them and see what's happened over the last 10+ yrs, would use an entirely different digit.

The Fuhrer's self-delusion seems to still leave him believing he has the Midas touch, but the rest of us know he's always had the Andrex touch.

Would that we could be rid of him and the whole ludicrous socialist experiment (Version 47 - failed, just like the other 46).

I'll stop short of recommending a whip-round to hire Vladimir Ramirez Sanchez, as

a) he's still having a holiday courtesy of the Froggie taxpayers

and

b) The Reichsminister's tame spooks probably monitor this site....

Coat? - because one of these days, I WILL have to get my coat - probably at 0300hrs when "the nice young man from the ministry" comes calling...

I just wondered...

Have RBS, or indeed, any of the major international banks, any track record in organising festivities in a place of ale-production?

@AC 13:11

You said "The Labour government show that they just do not have a fucking clue about how the internet and the web works."

Our survey said "The Labour government show that they just do not have a fucking clue."

Just one comment...

Quis custodiet ipsos custodies?

@Thomas

"...So this is just better provision of existing information?...?

Not a chance old lad. It might be "essentially public knowledge", but HM Gov's record with truth isn't exactly reassuring, is it?

Incorrect information on their uberdatabase will no doubt take fourteen years, three acts of parliament and four appeals to the highest court in the land to correct. Plus of course the time taken for whichever ungodly miscreant is Home Secretary to be "...carefully studying the ruling...".

Pah!

A curse on them and a plague on all their houses!

@Matt Bryant

You are Webster Phreaky & I claim my £10.00.