I wonder...

...just how many NuLab apparatchiks are used to track & trace any comment/communication to a Gov website.

That's bad enough, but to be fired for having your own opinion is so typical of this Stalinist Caledonian dictatorship currently occupying my country.

I hope they don't come the old "fired for mis-using web access" crap as that would make them look even more ridiculous - if possible. We all know that no "offence" would have been committed had there been an anonymous sycophantic post, don't we?

When do they open the "Camps for Political Re-education"?

'Sobvious

Elixir of youth! Human immortality might sound OK, but as I'm decrepit at 59 (so my son tells me) - what's the point of being 559 and even more decrepit?

@Dennis O'Neill

Well said, Sir.

I can't really think of anything to add: you put it so well.

@Ewen Bruce

Good grief, man:- a comment of common sense! Whatever next? No doubt you'll be flamed...

@Big Bear

"...those occasions where the machine is the recipient of spilt liquids...".

I've never thought of making a laptop "the recipient of spilt liquids".

Is there any advantage in doing so?

I gotta ask...

Did they really swim in it - or did they just go through the motions...?

Yep, that's my coat (with the Andrex in 1 pocket & the puppy in the other).

Microsoft holding my medical data....?

If that happened, I would expect to be treated for pregnancy, PMS and ovarian cysts.

And I'm a (fairly) healthy male, of almost 60 years...

@AC 23rd June 2009 13:35 GMT

"Wow, when did the British Navy Ship building become so bad? From a top flight Navy in the past to this?"

Since a minority in Britain, assisted by boundary gerrymandering by Labour, voted this shower of incompetents in three times in a row.

Brown's disdain for the armed forces is palpable, and his desire to irreversibly change the face of society through his doolally social engineering agenda has proved disastrous.

I read this morning that Labour's support has halved, which came as a total surprise.

I could not believe that after the events since 1997 that there are still those who say that Labour is the answer.

To which I can only say that it must have been a bloody stupid question, and perhaps it is time that we instituted basic intelligence and comprehension tests before enfranchising people.

A plague and a pox on Brown, his followers, and all their houses.

I suppose I won't be the first...

...to point out that our rebel colonial cousins long since forswore using correct English.

It has been a deliberate policy of theirs to abjure anything reminiscent of Mother England (e,g, manners, politeness, consideration, etc.) so one assumes that's why they have abandoned precision in language and communication.

Shock! Horror! Gasp!

Plod complies with court order???

All we need now is the Whacky one (and the Home Office) to do likewise, and I'll have to go and lie down for a while in a darkened room....

(It'll probably happen soon anyway:- 42 days in Room 101)

As usual..

The Dirty Digger's minions are the first to scream if they are asked to identify any of their sources - but it seems no-one else is to be afforded the same courtesy/consideration.

So a DC who tells it how it is is now admonished and his career will be blighted (c'mon, you KNOW it will) all for vainglorious hypocritical hacks.

Twats.

@Michael 2

"...what the law states it has to and when the judgement goes in the plaintiff's favour the Government will have obey the court..."

You mean just like the Government has obeyed the European Court's ruling on DNA retention by Plod?

Your faith in the system is touching, but most of us would not trust this Government to tell us the time...

If it's true...

...that a population gets the government it deserves, then the population of the UK - or at least a majority of them - must be so incompetent and moronic that I'm amazed they are allowed to be outside an institution.

Don't worry...

'Cos nothing, nichts, nul, nada, zero that has been centralised to Whitehall, or had a "Czar" appointed by this unreal set of incompetent bastards we have in place of a proper government has ever worked, or had the slightest effect.

Spin, spin & more spin.

Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose

Yup!

I'm a Mac man - even a fanboy - BUT I'm often asked to look at the Windows boxes of various friends who've got system which are well & truly nadgered.

With a little moderate interrogation applied to the user (i.e. limited use of the cosh, cattleprod & Agadoo tapes) I have found that over the last few years, more & more occurrences are due to what is laughingly called "social proliferation" (when it's damned ANTI-social to perpetrate it).

So, as always, the weakest link in ANY system is the liveware: the cheaper & more commonplace systems become, the greater the number that are bought by those who will just turn it on & use it, without any form of driving lesson, learning etc. With an ever-increasing pool of totally non-savvy users, life becomes a little easier for the ungodly.

Driving tests for computers, anyone?

Someone has to say it....

It's always been risky to be shot or tasered Down Under....

Mine's the one with the barbs in it, trailing wires...

We do already...

"If it takes more than 18hours then perhaps the requester should then have to foot the salary bill to go looking for it.."

The requester already foots the bill for the salary (and pension) of these drones. It's called "tax".

The drones used to be called "Public servants".

Remember?

Quelle surprise!

There's certainly footage been cut from that vid.

Have Texan plod been trained by the Met, perchance?

@RichardB

"So presumably this is a green light to employ the dimmest, slowest most naturally awkward people.."

Richard, old lad - you've just described most of officialdom and virtually all of government. Don't forget that the main reason they are employed in those sectors is that they are otherwise unemployable.

And as with a stagnant pool, the scum rises to the top.

Frau Schmidt's election slogan...

Widerstand ist zwecklos; sie werden assimiliert

Artist?

This pretentious little twat is an insult to art and to humanity.

May something unspeakably dreadful happen to her.

Soon.

And we've got....

Margaret Beckett.

(Sob!)

One observation

"....if this resentment spills over into active disobedience, then for a while at least, the British population may become just that bit less governable...."

Both the "if" and the "then" are situations which are long overdue.

It is the total disinterest/meek compliance of the British electorate with the cloud-cuckoo governance of recent years which has permitted - even encouraged - the ungodly to progress from silliness to stupidity to outright certifiable looniness.

A little touch of at least the Ghandis, or preferably the Jack Cades would go down exceedingly well.

I'm becoming concerned....

There have been times when I have felt it appropriate to remonstrate mildly with those whose vocabulary seems to be limited to basic (very) Anglo-Saxon.

More and more I now find myself thinking at least, in those very same terms & colloquialisms whenever the current (mal)administration is mentioned.

Since I am now only too aware of the effect that any mention of the current apology-for-a-government induces in even the most mild-mannered, might I offer sincere apologies to those I have berated unfairly.

As for the miscreants in the Palace of Westminster, may a herd of dysenteric elephants crap on the entire gang of wankers from an exceedingly great height, and drown the disgusting fuckers in a sea of semi-solid shit.

There - I'm still perturbed, but I can't think of a better way to express my feelings.

OMG

...and I was thinking that this sort of almost unbelievable idiocy could only occur under Whacky & her tame Stasi.

Now I see why Grinning Tony sucked up so much to the US authorities - nowhere else on Earth could he find such a concentration of morally suspect, technologically ignorant, all-round gormless cretins. No wonder he & NuLab felt so comfortable & at home with them.

And before I'm flamed for anti-Americanism, let me stress that I have no problem at all with the average US citizen - at least those whom I have met & sometimes worked with. Perhaps the USA has a job-creation scheme for mentally & morally incompetent morons, and they call it "Politics" and/or "The Legal System". If that is so, then it's nother thing we have in common...

@AC Monday 18th May 2009 20:11 GMT

In a word, Sir - Piffle!

Plod (theoretically) exercises his judgement as to whether certain behaviour is contrary to the law; which is NOT the same thing as re-interpreting/stretching the law. The difference is subtle, but important nonetheless.

If their judgement is palpably wrong they may face civil and indeed, criminal penalties.

To blatantly abnegate the authority of the court is certainly contempt - unacceptable from a Chief Constable.

He desrves the full force of the courts to descend upon him - pour encourager les autres - and perhaps being a timely reminder to Plod that they are public servants - NOT public masters.

As such, they must be seen to completely comply with the laws which they uphold/enforce. Any other course of action should be grounds for dismissal, or at least immediate suspension.

Whatever...

...the legalities, bringing proof of such a systematic abuse of our tax payments should attract a public interest immunity.

Failure to recognise this will smear 'the authorities' even more, and widen the gap of cynicism currently existing (and growing) between the government and the governed.

Put simply, they've had their chance and blown it and any attempt to pursue the whistle-blowers will be seen as an act of petty vindictive revenge.

That will go such a long way to restore our credence in Parliament & it's members...

Here we go again...

Plod is subject to the same laws & court orders as the rest of us. It is NOT Plod's place to interpret the laws.

Plod enforces the laws as they are written - M'learned friends & beaks do any necessary interpretation (and often unnecessary re-interpretation).

Whatever the moral aspects of these hard drives, permitting Plod to ignore court rulings and allowing them to enforce the law-as-they-think-it-should-be rather than the law-as-it-is is a fearful step further down the police-state road upon which NuLab seems hell-bent.

@James O'Brien

You don't need OSX to make you look like a total twat, old lad - it appears Mother Nature got there first...

Liquid Nitrogen...

is cool.

Mines the padded quilted one, with a furry hood.

@AV 7th May 2009 21:07 GMT

Oh dear; it seems the Phreakster's back incognito and spewing bile, inaccuracies and general crud into the ether.

Street crudability!

Just when you thought...

....they couldn't get any more hopeless & incompetent, they turn round & surprise you.

How in God's name has this country endured three terms of the most concentrated collection of retards this side of the Bush residence?

and WHY?

I just had to....

Rate it as "Oh orgasmic"....

Coat & cold shower.....

Worrying times

Schmidt (and her equally unpleasant predecessors) have deliberately created their own politically-motivated Cheka.

But they are too incompetent - or just plain too dumb - to have made any contingency plans for the situation (becoming very likely) when the creation spirals out of control, and turns against, and bites its master.

This does not bode well for the rest of us..

Back in 42 days (internal haemorrhage permitting)

Utter midden..

Just fodder for a) The Press and b) The gullible.

When petty officials & jobsworths are given ANY powers, have they EVER given these powers up? or have they EVER been effectively rescinded? Answer - not in a million years.

Damian Green was obviously part of a terrorist plot to shatter the very fabric or our society, by showing Wacky to be an incompetent, venal cow with no saving grace(s) thus fomenting FUD in the general population, and now the wacky one thinks that making a cosmetic change to the verbiage, whilst in reality sweet bugger all changes, will result in us all viewing her as a latter day Joan of Arc, the heroine who restored our civil liberties & freedoms..

Fail!

IMHO Jacqui, you're still a miserable, venal, incompetent, arrogant and deeply unpleasant power-crazy loon.

Proof?

I quote "Wacky Jacqui has also promised a review of the national DNA database after the Home Office lost its final appeal to the European Court of Human Rights and was told to delete entries for innocent people."

The court to which NuLab genuflects says to her "You're breaking the law: You're guilty: Do this"...

Wacky "studies the ruling" - I seriously doubt she could effectively study The Beano - and "promises a review".

If one of Wacky's personal Chekists (The Met, inter alia) grabs me on suspicion of being a Brazilian Electrician, and I survive long enough to be dragged to the Bailey, and a tame loony liberal-lefty idiot of a judge tells me to do 12 months, would I be able to toddle off home saying "I will study the ruling", and "I promise to review my activities (sometime)"?

Even Obersturmbahnfuhrer Schmidt is subject to the law! How then does she continue to ignore it when it doesn't suit her, or is "inconvenient"?

As (theoretically) free citizens it is our right to rebel.

It is fast becoming our civic duty.

@AC 02:11

A voice of common sense: A trojan is definitely not a virus, as you say, but It has to be installed, and is therefore reliant upon the PICNIC* virus, which is all too common.

* Problem In Chair Not In Computer

Some things I won't be told.....

I will be replacing my K-RAZR shortly. I would like an iPhone - but it's not available from Orange. I've been with Orange - on contract - for over 10 years and haven't had a problem. In fact I've always found them to be obliging & helpful.

I am just not going to change my telephone service provider to get an iPhone - and I'm an Apple fan and have been a Mac user for over 20 years.

I often wonder how many there are who, like me, would have an iPhone but aren't prepared to change networks.

Still, the Samsung M8800 Pixon looks quite nice....

BH - 'cos whatever I get will be monitored by the whacky one.

@Nick Palmer

1)

My name isn't 'Green'

2)

Let's all blame the wicked Tories for everything. The fact that they never attempted to control & keep tabs on us is meaningless:- as we all know, Labour is an organisation totally democratic & altruistic, and so solidly pro the noble proletariat & peasantry, that any nasty sleazy shenanigans simply cannot be their fault - it HAS to be those wicked Tories or your hardwired unthinking prejudice might explode under the onslaught of reality!

______________________________________________

@Steen Hive

'Spose it was nothing to do with that well-known philanthrope, Arthur Scargill who was so concerned for the poor miners that he didn't even bother them with a ballot on their strike!

I'm sure the taxi-driver murdered by pickets in S Wales (concrete bombed from a bridge above the carriageway) would agree they'd been driven to it by the heartless Tories.

The fact is that British deep mines for narrow coal seams were outdated and too expensive to compete with much cheaper open-cast mines abroad. Coal was also being recognised as a dirty fuel and was on its way out. The majority of miners got a redundancy settlement of which we can only dream today.

Descending to crudities in your writing does I'm afraid, go some way towards diminishing the value of your argument - assuming there was any value in it initially - or are you merely trying to establish good proletarian credentials?

I despair for the future of our country.

Hardly surprising..

As our 2nd-Home Secretary is assiduously following the likes of the Straw man and "Brains" Reid in being hell-bent in turning the UK police into NuLab's personal enforcers, it's not surprising these things are on the increase...

1) Plod enforces the law as it is

2) Plod enforces the law as he sees it to be

3) Plod enforces the law that isn't yet law but he thinks should be

4) Plod excuses himself from being subject to any variety of law as he's too busy enforcing, interpreting, interpolating and interfering.

NuLabour - NuCheka.

Even when these sleazy miscreants have been prised from office, it will take one hell of a long time to repair the wanton damage they have visited upon the infrastructure and the very social fabric of what used to be a great country.

@Chewy

No, it's not April 1st, and the Mail really is far more anti Nu-Lab Stasi than the Mirror (inverted snobbery & lowest common denominator), or the Grauniad (intellectual snobbery, smug & patronising chattering and so NuLab it hurts) - both of which are amazing in their fawning obeisance to NuLab.

As regards "..surely it is the job of government to help fund things that are in the public interest rather than force them on business/individuals expense...", you're spot on, old chap.

The big HOWEVER in this case is :-

However, this current shower have not done what is in the public interest, they have done what is in THEIR interest.

Which is usually NOT in the public interest.

And they have forced business/individuals to pay for it.

Put simply, they haven't a clue.

@AC 12:01

'Fraid your verbal shorthand is utterly inaccurate old thing.

The Daily Mail - oft pilloried here as a reincarnated "Volkischer Beobachter" is actually nothing of the sort. As a Mail reader for many years - and several other papers of differing political hue as well, I can only say that the Mail has been the most vociferous and reasoned over the loss of our civil liberties, and the rise of jobsworth apparatchiks under Stasi-like NuLab.

Cue immediate flaming from the "I have my views - don't bother me with facts" brigade.

These are of course, the very same enlightened little souls who've voted for NuLab three times in a row, believing they are a party for the noble proletariat, and refusing to accept the evidence of their own eyes and ears.

Politicians

An expressed desire to seek political office should be sufficient grounds for disqualification from doing so.

@Sarah

Has anyone ever told you you're devastating when you're angry...?

Pupils

No doubt our 2nd Home Secretary & the Straw Man are watching this carefully - and seeking out ideas regarding how to implement it.

Ludicrous, you think?

In the 1970's & 1980's, the idea that a so-called Labour government would institute and implement the restrictions on our freedoms and privacy that the last twelve years have seen would have been laughed at, and anyone suggesting it would have been dismissed as a conspiracy-theorist paranoid nut.

We have been warned.

What? Me, worry?

I really don't care very much about Googlecams possibly capturing a vague shot of me on the street - UNLESS all details are being made available to our 2nd-Home Secretary and her evil henchmen - in which case I object vehemently and even violently, as soon as I find some like-minded souls with whom I might commit conspiracy...

If it remains "internet only", I am far less worried, since I believe "Jackboots" could be kept quiet for months on end by giving her an Etch-a-Sketch, and telling her it was a laptop. "Yes, your second-homeness, hold it upside-down and shake to reboot..."

@Simon Williams.

Weekly Feature? Yes Please.

I'll even say "Pretty Please"...

And with a few choice interjections from our delightful eclect & erudite moderatrix - Nirvana.

(Nirvana? Yes, I am an aging hippie, since you ask)

Mine's the Afghan, Man, with issues of I.T. & OZ in the pocket

@Hans

My money talks:- it says "Goodbye".

Mine's the one with the poem on the back:-

"Whack a Jacqui a day

Keep the miseries away"

@AC 23.01

Q). Do you still think I'm a "silly little man (or woman)"?

Indded, Sir (or Madam) I do.

Phrases like "...- such as the Tories soon having the kind of police state (albeit unfinished) they could only dream of but dare not build back in the '80s -..." is a monstrously arrogant presumption that you are correct in your statement that Tories dream of a latter-day Cheka, but dare not institute it.

Being of 1950 vintage myself, I remember the '80s very well and your statement is utterly incorrect.

It is at best, sophistry.

And as regards "In opposition, will Labour MPs, party members, supporters and activists feel safe and free to operate? They'll be under constant surveillance by the Tory police state! They'll have everything logged, their movements tracked, the laws will be in place to allow intrusive, covert surveillance on the flimsiest of grounds, etc, etc."

I don't suppose you recall one Damian Green, subject to political harassment by NuLab's tame enforcers (the Met), with the utterly cynical washing-of-hands by Gorbals Mick - rapidly learning the Macavity approach from his master - and passing of blame and therefore responsibility to his rather hapless Serjant-at-Arms.

NuLab have plumbed new depths in sleaze, arrogance, and general contempt for the rest of us - so to say to them "Do not support this - it may be used against you in the future" is totally missing the point.

It is naive in the utmost.

The cry is "Do not support this - the electorate do not want it and it has no place in a free and democratic society".

As NuLab are hell-bent on removing our freedoms & democratic processes, I can only repeat that there comes a time when rebellion is not only the right of every honest citizen, but also their inescapable civic duty.

@AC Mon 16th 22:01

"It should be easy to persuade Labour MPs to support dropping these kinds of Stasi-like plans. Just ask them how they feel about the Tories running such a police state.

In opposition, will Labour MPs, party members, supporters and activists feel safe and free to operate? They'll be under constant surveillance by the Tory police state! They'll have everything logged, their movements tracked, the laws will be in place to allow intrusive, covert surveillance on the flimsiest of grounds, etc, etc.

Wake up, Labour, to your own nightmare!...."

Good God, the old 'Labour Good, Tories Bad" moronic mindset still flourishes, it appears.

Tories OPPOSE this, and Labour ARE RUSHING IT THROUGH with the SUPPORT OF LABOUR MP's, you silly little man (or woman).

To have someone saying that the main reason for opposing a draconian NuLabour police-state is the fear that the wicked tories might get hold of it is so utterly ludicrous it defies belief, analysis and rational explanation.

I can only surmise that AC sneaked onto the Nurse's computer whilst their attention was distracted by another inmate/patient...

@John Smith

<"There was a black helicopter brigade, though, who liked to think that all calls were centrally monitored for key words"

They were partly right. I think Duncan Campbell did a series of articles on this in the New Statesman.>

I hope so:-

For quite some time now I have readily sprinkled my emails, text messages and phone calls with (what I presume to be) suspect key words just for the sheer hell of it...

Anything to annoy our 2nd-Home Secretary...