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* Posts by Ted Treen

1694 posts • joined 19 Apr 2007

China plans astro-farms on Mars

Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: Surely you mean:

Upvoted 'cos you got it right (according to my Mac's translator widget).

Crever crogs!

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Samsung: Demand for mobes forced 16hr days on factory slaves

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Why is the first post about Apple?

They're just following the Reg's pet Trollmeisters: trained like Pavlov's dogs to rant about Apple if the words Samsung, Foxconn etc. etc. are used - or even alluded to.

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Unlocked iPhone 5 on sale in US, cheaper than UK - but not cheap

Ted Treen
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Pirate

Re: I bought

For $30???

I presume it burned your fingers...

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Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Some comparison...

Sure - but that doesn't avoid the fact that that is totally out of Apple's hands and is nothing whatsoever to do with them. Yes we could buy from overseas, but then HMRC would screw you for VAT, import duty et. etc.

US tax can be legally avoided, UK tax can't*.

*Unless you're Google, or Starbucks, or Vodafone etc. etc.

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Ted Treen
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FAIL

Some comparison...

US web prices DON'T include sales tax. It varies from state to state.

UK prices include VAT at 20% so your $848 would equate to $1,018.00 in the UK.

Add to that the other costs borne by business in the EU/UK which US businesses DON'T have to bear, and maybe "the cost of being a British fanboi is a high one" but nowhere near as high as that which Leach unsurprisingly claims in her little exercise in sophistry - encore une fois!

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Global warming still stalled since 1998, WMO Doha figures show

Ted Treen
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Holmes

Re: You can prove anything with statistics/graphs etc etc

Could it be that your wife has better taste?

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Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: Wrong. @AC 12:41

All overlooking the obvious:- Warble gloaming has been hammered ad infinutum ad nauseam by our wonderful, altruistic, deeply caring ruling élite, so they have oodles of our money (which we earned) so they can save us from our own follies as they, naturally know best.

OR

They're a bunch of self-seeking shysters, gleefully jumping on any excuse to misappropriate more of our hard-earned to their own pockets and/or for their own benefit, and the day when I accept that Balls, Harman, Cameron OR Cleggover know better than I about anything, is the day when my brain will have ceased to be.

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Iran's Photoshop FAIL: 'New drone' actually Japanese university bird

Ted Treen
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Pirate

Nice knowing you, Bill...

...The fatwah's in the post, I should imagine.

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Harley allows Apple to use 'Lightning' brand on 'playthings'

Ted Treen
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Pint

I think...

...I'll patent the word "patent".

Then it's patently obvious I can sue all the bastards...

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Man facing rare refusal-to-unlock-encryption charge: Court date set

Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: 10 years per indictment would be good

And also about bloody mindedness.

No, I would NOT let self-appointed 'authorities' nose through my hard drives.

I confirm to you good people that there is nothing more secret on it than my monthly budget and Christmas shopping list. But why the hell should any government - local, national or plod - decide they have the right to see it?

They don't - they can sod off. And to their acolytes I say "No I've got nothing to hide, but my private affairs are just that". "Private!" "Now kindly Foxtrot Oscar".

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Ted Treen
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Holmes

@AC 09:14

"...then deport to Scotland..."

Don't we have some ruling against "cruel & unusual punishment"?

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Pirate cops bust LITTLE GIRL, take her Winnie-the-Pooh laptop

Ted Treen
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Pirate

Re: Fine does not fit the crime

@Destry All Monsters (13:36)

I AM thinking of the lawyers.

That's why your earlier advice to "...learn to use guns. Lots of guns..." made such perfect sense.

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Register boffinry confab: Mass debate on the Perfect Kilogram

Ted Treen
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Pint

Re: Mass Debate

He's just baiting you..

In this, he's a master...

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UK.gov to upgrade buying tool after mega cockup downs £1bn deal

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: sooo

Probably specced by Ada Lovelace - took years to go through committee stage, then was cobbled together by Senior Mandarin's great nephew - 'cos he's got a GCSE in woodwork.

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Microsoft-Motorola patent row: Google wants $4 BEELLION a year

Ted Treen
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WTF?

@Chicken Marengo

I suppose it's just (but ONLY just) possible that a few are going to ridiculous extremes to bring things to a head, so patent law is overhauled, being totally unfit for purpose in the US of A, and not a lot better in most other places.

Furthermore, we could all indulge in a little schadenfreude at the sight of hordes of laid-off or skint patent lawyers signing on for unemployment benefits, or retraining as Burger servers, parking attendants etc. - the brighter ones, that is.

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HORNY ALIEN vegetarian monsters once ROAMED CANADA

Ted Treen
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Boffin

@Nolveys

No, they're LibDems on holiday...

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AARGH! We're ALL DOOMED, bellows UN - right on schedule

Ted Treen
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Boffin

But then again...

Respect scientific research in 1880 stated that with the projected increase in traffic, both London's and New York's streets would be 14 feet deep in horse manure by the year 1915.

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HP: Autonomy had us believing in a false IDOL

Ted Treen
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Alert

I don't suppose...

...I can just repeat the phrase "Caveat emptor"...

Also, Mike Lynch DOES have a point:- there's nothing like a lovely distraction when you're about to release some bum trading figures.

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Sorority girls gone WILD: '1 to 3' casual sex 'hookups' every MONTH

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Oh for glod's sake!

Utter gonads.

There were sufficient young ladies who were happily accommodating, without one having to spend hours/days/weeks months on those who were unwilling.

Rape was viewed much as it is viewed today - if not rather worse.

Yes, I was there - I'm a 1950 model.

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Oprah Winfrey too late to save Microsoft's Windows 8

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Missing the Christmas season?!

One "thumbs down" for agreeing that a major PC show in January isn't the best idea for capitalising on Christmas sales?

Sometimes I REALLY wonder about the mentality of some commenters...

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Ted Treen
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FAIL

Re: Missing the Christmas season?!

It would appear so...

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Lord to sue Twitter users who falsely accused him of abuse

Ted Treen
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Thumb Up

Well hopefully...

This might do a little to wipe the smug grin from the terminally-irritating Mrs Bercow, and her equally offensive mini-spouse.

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Post-defenestration Microsoft: It's the APIs, stupid. And Metro

Ted Treen
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Coffee/keyboard

@blerko

Sir,

Enough of this already - unless you have an unexhaustable supply of keyboards to divvy out...

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Apple axed Brit retail boss for doing his job well - TOO well, perhaps

Ted Treen
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Boffin

Re: Had a little giggle at our US reporters perspective.

"...Browett was used to selling value-for-money products..."

That must have been BEFORE he worked for Dixons, then

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Apple forced to cut dealers in to get iPad Mini shifting, says analyst

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: OK so you agree with the analyst then.........

Thanks Big_Ted. I stand corrected.

Perhaps I should have said "..anything from the ONS, or any Party Manifesto...".

I still believe the vast majority of analysts do little more than cast chicken bones, with results about as credible as that exercise.

"Little" Ted

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Ted Treen
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Holmes

"...so says an analyst..."

Therefore I immediately rate it as having all the validity of any of the works of The Brothers Grimm.

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Windows boss Steve Sinofsky exits Microsoft

Ted Treen
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: LOL ...

You, Sir, are a wicked man.

Keep it up, please.

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Peak Apple: Forstall was 'closest thing to Jobs they had left'

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Latest score

Trollfest 1: Real news 0

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Apple-v-Samsung $1bn iPhone fine: 'Jury foreman was biased'

Ted Treen
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Trollface

I rather think...

...that it's somewhat more than a fortnight old.

Still, nothing gets in the way of a Leach trollfest.

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Apple kicked out of China smartphone top 5 by, er, Yulong and pals

Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: @ Tchou (@Ted Treen)

You may well be right, Sir!

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Ted Treen
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FAIL

Re: @ Tchou (@Ted Treen)

Evidently, I'm thinking rather more effectively than you, sir.

"Think different" not "Think differently" was an Apple slogan. Some years ago.

It really never ceases to amaze me that the anti-Apple mouth-foamers delight in pointing out that in smartphones, Apples marketshare is <30%, and in computers, <20%. Yet they claim that those who purchase a minority product are sheep.

Now let me get to grips with this idea...

The minority who purchase Apple products are sheep, and the majority who go along with what they consider 'mainstream products' are rugged individualists.

Go along with the crowd/majority, and you're an individualist: be part of a minority, and you're a sheep.

Well it looks like Orwell was correct in his writing regarding Newspeak. Evidently "War IS peace", "Freedom IS slavery" and "Ignorance IS strength".

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Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Even the most brainwashed iSheep can see the pattern now

Nice one Bob.

An article by Dan Crow (Who he?) in that well-known journal of technical excellence, The Grauniad, confirms that you are one of the elite cognoscenti, and anyone with the temerity to think differently is a sheep.

Great stuff!

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Nokia Lumia 920 Windows Phone 8 handset review

Ted Treen
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Thumb Up

Looks nice.

I'm quite happy with my iPhone, but I love it when Apple's competition introduce something that's good.

There's nothing like a bit of competition to act as a spur to ALL manufacturers, which generally results in a better product for the end user.

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ALIEN DETECTION was SUPPRESSED by the BBC - top boffin

Ted Treen
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WTF?

Healthier how?

I LIKE Werther's Originals...

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What made us human? Being ARMED with lethal ranged weapons

Ted Treen
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Holmes

This could be a problem...

The world's last surviving neanderthal (John Prescott) might be advised he has a damages case against Homo Sapiens...

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Office for Android, Apple iOS: 'REALLY REAL this time' - report

Ted Treen
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Facepalm

Re: Several decent, fully featured Office suites on Android already

Because if you don't, a certain simian CEO might find himself with whatever is the Merkin version of a P45...

...and you wouldn't want to be responsible - even in part - for that, would you?

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'iPhone 5 is so easily scratched we just can't get them out the door'

Ted Treen
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FAIL

Re: cynical ploy

Wrong ploy:

Writing crap which thrills the Apple-haters and gets Apple zealots all of a quiver is a cynical ploy to ensure Leach doesn't become a bag lady sometime soon...

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Apple engineers 'pay no attention to anyone's patents', court told

Ted Treen
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Headmaster

Re: They're stretching the definition of a VPN to breaking point

I think using "prey" instead of "pray" when commenting on a case involving Patent Lawyers would count as the granddaddy of all Freudian slips...

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Ted Treen
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Flame

It appears...

...that without joining the brouhaha over what is and what isn't a valid patent, that not only is the US patent system intrinsically broken, but US patent attorneys have all the morals of hyenas, and the Texas Patent Courts seem to exist in some peculiar little space warp of their own, frequently making decisions which completely fly in the face of logic and rational thought.

I recall Goldman Sachs being described in Rolling Stone as "...a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money."

They must be related to Patent Lawyers - the resemblance is unmistakeable.

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Ted Treen
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Happy

Re: Love these lawyers

During the early '80s, I installed WP equipment there, and I recall the Partner/Manager with whom I dealt was one Tony Payne.

Yup, I had to send letters to A Payne, of Wright Hassell.

You couldn't make it up...

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UK prosecutors, cops ponder new probe into NASA hacker McKinnon

Ted Treen
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Trollface

Re: The never-ending David Blunkett effect

...and he didn't see it coming...

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Ted Treen
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Big Brother

Re: It's time for this circus to end..

Gary didn't make them look stupid.

They've being doing that for years quite successfully, all on their own, without any outside help.

As has ours, before anyone accuses me of partisan bias.

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Welsh council's unused mountain of 2,400 laptops

Ted Treen
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Flame

Re: lets see someone sacked for this.

Very good.

Out in the real world it would happen - but not, of course, in the public sector.

It's only taxpayers' money, so who cares?

There's plenty more where that came from.

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Mmm, what's that smell: Coffee or sweat? How to avoid a crap IT job

Ted Treen
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Alert

"Licking the hand that feeds IT - but give the kiddies a 'Yar Boo Sucks' session if we can even vaguely allude to Apple."

That's about it:- under the auspices of El Reg's very own Troll Queen...

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Apple must apologise for its surly apology on its website on Saturday

Ted Treen
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Trollface

Re: Highly respected online forum????

"...the register declared highly respected in a court of law..."

So are lawyers - and these days, the degree of comprehension, veracity and useful information is much the same from both.

Troll? to 'honour' Leach - the Troll Queen if ever there was one

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Analyst slams Apple innovation FAIL

Ted Treen
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Re: Simply becuase

Judging from their spoutings, I seriously doubt that the majority of analysts could count the fingers on one hand and come up with the same answer twice running.

I also believe that if an assistant janitor in an obscure public toilet made a less-than-complimentary comment regarding Apple, The Register would splash it as a headline:- 'bigging up' the aforementioned janitor as an "industry watcher", "technical guru" or "respected commentator" or some such meaningless tosh...

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EE 4G LTE review

Ted Treen
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Meh

Re: Bristol is Broken - EE 4G related?

At work in Derby:- "Unable to activate mobile data" since around 0930 today.

It's just come back on.

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APPLE: SCREW YOU, BRITS, everyone else says Samsung copied us

Ted Treen
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FAIL

Unsurprising...

"...and is a mealy mouthed six-paragraph account..."

Unlike Leach's effort - which is a mealy mouthed seven-paragraph account

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N00bs vs Windows 8: We lock six people in a room with new OS

Ted Treen
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Happy

Natch...

"...MS could have done better with 8 year olds as advisers..."

But you've got to find an 8-yr old who's the intellectual equivalent of Balmer.

Where d'you find a kid that dim?

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