* Posts by WonkoTheSane

515 posts • joined 17 Jul 2008

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NEVER MIND the B*LLOCKS Osbo peddles, deficits don't really matter

WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

I have my suspicions...

During the election, CallMeDave pledged to bring in a law to lock the rates of VAT, NI, & Income Tax "within 100 days".

This of course gives him 99 days to raise those rates without breaking his promise. Now Osborne has announced a "surprise" budget for Jul 8. Hmm.

(El Reg needs a tinfoil hattery icon, but this will have to do for now.)

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BT boss in shock 'bigger is better' claim as £12.5bn EE bid heats up

WonkoTheSane
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Re: They could succeed and form BE...

Nope. Sky bought Be a couple years ago.

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Screech! Grand Theft Auto V malware mods warning

WonkoTheSane
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Obscure X-Men reference

Kitty Pride would have been a more universally known through-wall-walker.

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Musk: 'It's BS for ex-Vulture to claim I forced employee to miss sprog's birth'

WonkoTheSane
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The best children

Are other peoples. You can give them back!

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Blocking pirate sites doesn't weaken pirates say Euroboffins

WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

Think tank realises Whack-A-Mole site takedowns are not working

Expect Gubmint to discount new theory in 3...2...1...

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Apple taxpayers swarm to stone-age iPhone 6+ purely for the bigness

WonkoTheSane
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Re: I know why Apple are claiming so many sales

Hopefully not, as it's still sealed in its box, as is the 20GB data plan SIM they sent with it.

On the up side, they seem to have also refunded me £49.99 for receiving this phone.

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WonkoTheSane
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Holmes

I know why Apple are claiming so many sales

It's because I recently received an iPhone 6 from EE, despite never ordering one.

I'm telling them that if they don't collect it inside 2 weeks, it's mine to sell according to

"Consumer Protection from Unfair Trading Regulations 2008"

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Building the world's biggest telescope array - with machines that don't yet exist

WonkoTheSane
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Alien

Control centre announced the other day

Jodrell Bank will be the central control for this array.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsround/32538364

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Yow! It's the HOT NEW 'Collections' from Google! Oh wait ... it's a Google+ thing

WonkoTheSane
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FAIL

Dear Google,

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0MK7qz13bU

That is all.

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Age guessing with Microsoft is FUN! Now give us your metadata

WonkoTheSane
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Big Brother

Tinfoil hat time

Lots of pics to top up 3-letter-agency facial recognition databases.

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EU Commish is rather pleased German BND and NSA thought it worth spying on

WonkoTheSane
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Black Helicopters

BND forgot to check something.

BND may have made a deal with the NSA to not spy on Germany directly, but did NSA have a deal with GCHQ to do it for them?

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DRM is NOT THE LAW, I AM THE LAW, says JUDGE DREDD

WonkoTheSane
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Joke

Re: below is a list where DRM successfully stopped piracy

"Remember, home taping is killing music."

Funny, I thought it was Simon Cowell???

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WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

I believe you mean "Zarjaz!"

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What's broken in this week's Windows 10 build? Try the Start Menu, for one

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

Re: known issue that causes every typed letter to appear twice

Shouldn't there be FOUR S's in the middle?

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Lib Dems wheel out Digital Rights Bill pledge as election sweetener

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

The rules of politics

1: Promise everything

2: Deliver nothing

3: Blame the other lot

and the "unwritten" rule:-

DON'T GET CAUGHT!

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Bonking with Apple is no fun 'cos it's too hard to pay, say punters

WonkoTheSane
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Re: What study?

In my area, Aldi and Lidl are the only stores which take contactless payment of any kind.

The "Big 4" supermarkets don't want to know!

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WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

Re: I'm puzzled by these attempts.

@1980s_coder - Not sure you understand how things work around here.

You used the words "patents" and "expired" in the same sentence!

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WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

Ahem:- https://xkcd.com/927/

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Nuclear waste spill: How a pro-organic push sparked $240m blunder

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

Re: Why not organic kitty litter?

AC is correct. The caffeine from decaf is sold for many megabux to energy drink / cola manufacturers.

This means that decaf is actually a WASTE product!

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'If people can encrypt their cell phones, what's stopping them encrypting their PCs?'

WonkoTheSane
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True - That's why the recommended alternative is rot-26

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Consumers beware! Ofcom's seen a scary new mobe nasty: APPS

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

Re: "Don’t download from places which are not official app stores"

What I'm saying is that there IS an official UK National Lottery app, which they cannot put on Google Play due to US anti-gambling rules.

You have to download it yourself from the UK National Lottery website, enable "unknown sources" & install it yourself.

See https://www.national-lottery.co.uk/android/installation?icid=bsp:na:tx

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WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

"Don’t download from places which are not official app stores"

This includes the OFFICIAL National Lottery App, because gambling is forbidden by Google's T&Cs (don't know about Apple & MS ones)

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Wikimedia chucks sueball at NSA and DOJ over mass surveillance

WonkoTheSane
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Big Brother

A defendant was missed out

The suit should also name FISA for "enabling acts of cyber-terrorism".

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'Hi, I'm from Microsoft and I am GOING TO KILL YOU'

WonkoTheSane
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Trollface

I've also had a few of these.

My usual response is either:-

A: Wind them up so tight they start swearing down the phone, at which point I tell them their supervisor is standing RIGHT behind them.

or

B: Say in my best 1930's BBC accent, "I'm terribly sorry old chap, but I don't speak a word of English. Good day to you, sir!"

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Euro ministers ditch plan to ban roaming charges

WonkoTheSane
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Devil

I smell lobbyists

Lobbyists with manilla envelopes

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US court rubber-stamps dragnet metadata surveillance (again)

WonkoTheSane
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Big Brother

What makes you think they haven't?

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BOFH in mugnificent return to Cash'n'Carrion

WonkoTheSane
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Pint

BOFH logo on "Bubba Keg"?

1.5L of insulated caffeine (or other BOFH-essential lubricants)

Note bottle opener at base of grip.

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41no8tr5J9L._SY300_.jpg

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FCC Republicans slam brakes on net neutrality, but this wagon ain't slowing

WonkoTheSane
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Re: Is it just me?

People, please!

If you're going to downvote, at least have the courtesy to say WHY!

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WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

Is it just me?

Or does the article read as if the ISPs are claiming that doing nothing is "unworkable"?

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EU ministers hold Big Meeting on Big Data. But how will they get you to hand it over?

WonkoTheSane
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Pirate

I, for one, do not wish to be transparent

(because that would be... ew!)

Skull - because bones --->

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Gullible Apple users targeted by bogus order cancellation scam

WonkoTheSane
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Re: WOW

It's not lunchtime yet. Reg-ites are still too under-alcoholed to comment properly.

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Keyless vehicle theft suspects cuffed after key Met Police, er, 'lockdown'

WonkoTheSane
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Re: Microdots ?

It's called "Smartwater" http://www.smartwater.com/

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Plane crash blamed on in-flight SELFIES

WonkoTheSane
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It's likely one of the 90% scale replicas doing the airshow circuit.

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LICKED: Behold my TOAD-PROOF ERECTION, boasts Aussie boffin

WonkoTheSane
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Childcatcher

Nursery Rhymes could have saved all this trouble...

"There was an old woman who swallowed a fly" etc.

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Snoopers' Charter amendments withdrawn – FOR NOW ...

WonkoTheSane
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Black Helicopters

Amendment required

We need some brave soul to add an amendment to a bill, which prohibits amending bills in the future.

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Microsoft will give away Windows 10 FREE - for ONE year

WonkoTheSane
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Linux

The unasked question

How is it at cohabiting with another OS?

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Tesla S P85+: Smiling all the way to the next charging point

WonkoTheSane
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I understand Boris is trying that for the new hybrid buses.

Not for a full charge, just a quick top-up whilst at the bus stop.

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WonkoTheSane
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Re: If only..

" If only the laws of physics and chemistry allowed a cheap small, light, high capacity battery to be constructed..."

Or is it patent issue?

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World's largest ship swallows 900 MEGATINS of baked beans

WonkoTheSane
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Article is incomplete

BBC also say a larger ship (capacity 19,224 containers) will be launched in 52 days.

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US kills EU watchdog's probe into EU cops sharing EU citizens' data

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

Re: No point in kicking a dead dog.

"Sorry, but giving up your freedom for security is not an option - in fact a US President originally said that, but I guess he'd be sitting in Gitmo today for an anti-American attitude."

Ben Franklin was never El Presidente.

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CES: WELCOME YOUR ROBOT OVERLORDS... and, er, co-workers

WonkoTheSane
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It's been done...

Someone in USA (due to last minute illness) was able to attend last year's World SciFi Convention at London Excel using one of these.

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Mirror, mirror: Seagate shows off 1TB data shiny at HDD beauty contest

WonkoTheSane
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Re: Can I take this opportunity to moan about UK pricing?

USA adds sales tax of between 0% (Oregon) & 9.45% (Tennessee) at the checkout, making the drive anything from $64.99 to $71.13

UK adds 20% VAT BEFORE the checkout, making the drive $78 (or £51.47 at today's rate), so you're right. It's a 50% markup for good old "Treasure Island"!

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UK cops caught using 12 MILLION Brits' mugshots on pic database

WonkoTheSane
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Big Brother

In other news...

Stores report sudden spike in sales of Groucho Glasses & Guy Fawkes masks

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Seagate adds FIFTY PER CENT more capacity to new NAS drive

WonkoTheSane
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Re: Part Number?

And monies. What monies for drive?

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Brit smut slingers shafted by UK censors' stiff new stance

WonkoTheSane
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Childcatcher

What's with the Victorian moralities?

The old battleaxe has been dead over a century now.

Won't someone think of the grownups?

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After USA FREEDOM Act's failure, what's next for mass surveillance?

WonkoTheSane
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Headmaster

US Politics needs one "Lone Wolf"

Someone who will sneak a rider onto an unrelated, but absolutely essential bill, which bans riders on bills.

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Toyota to launch hydrogen (ie, NATURAL GAS) powered fuel cell hybrid

WonkoTheSane
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Facepalm

Fusion EATS hydrogen to make helium, leaving less fuel for the car!

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Ofcom tackles complaint over Premier League footie TV rights

WonkoTheSane
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Trollface

Dear Ofcom,

Please force the FA to start their own subscription funded TV channel, so that I DON'T have to pay for sport I WILL NEVER WATCH!

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Bug fixes! Get your APPLE BUG FIXES! iOS and OS X updates right here!

WonkoTheSane
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Trollface

Hmmm...

So "disabling" TRIM support on 3rd party SSDs isn't a bug, but a feature?

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Nvidia doubles Tesla grunt at SC14

WonkoTheSane
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Joke

Bitcoin miner?

This could pay for itself in days!

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