2363 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007
What's the point in having a glorified fishing boat running on veggi oil if it means I've got nothing to cook my chips in?!
Mines the one with the greasy marks on it.
Flat battery in just over 2 hours... I remember the roasting the N95 got when it first came out, I even had my carrier trying to talk me out of it as an upgrade option because the battery life was supposedly so poor, but not even on the early firmware which was a bit juice hungry, could you murder it that fast!
Guess that's the joy of windows... So can Windows Mobile join botnets?
So since the arms limitation treaties won't let him have any new bigger nukes to play with, he needs to find another huge weapon he can have that is bigger and better than the rest of the world. (Is it compulsory for all US military men to have micro-penises or do they have them done surgically to render them safe from female double agents?).
So whilst the US of A declares war on 1,000,000 home PCs across the globe, anyone from outside the US of A will wonder why they seem to be having problems visiting any US hosted website as the pipes coming out are all clogged up with Uncle Sam's cyber-nuke fest.
I'm sure the ISPs will love that!
It's okay, I found some gloves :-D
Eurovision is always amusing...
You can sum up the entire politics of Europe just by watching.
For example, Ireland and UK are generally nice to each other.
France will never give the UK any meaningful votes, and vice-versa.
All the ex-Russian states are so terrified of upsetting their big red neighbour, they always give it lots of votes, even if the song is purely the sound of a Yak breaking wind process by a Vocoder. At the rate Russia is crumbling round the edges, there will soon be so many ex-Russian states that Russia will win every year!
There is of course one remaining question... How exactly does Israel qualify as being in Europe?
IDDQD IDKFA at the ready...
I'm already loving the idea of a Wii chainsaw... Please do a Wii version!
More questioning required...
This guy must be one of our secret robot masters.
Think about it... He's holding a laser pointed in his hand, and tracking a moving helicopter accurately enough to dazzle the pilot...
There can be no other explanation!
...they do a random drug test on the contents of the house... Although they'd have to pick a suitable day with a high turnout.
How about when they are all voting for this new bill...
Everyone that votes for the reclassification, go through the green door, roll up your sleeves, then a publicly published hypocrite list comes out the other side.
"Try tackling the "serious crime" of charging long-suffering passengers three quid to travel 200 yards packed like veal calves en route to a French slaughterhouse"
1) Get an oyster card...
2) Look at an A-Z occasionally and learn how to walk from Leicester Square and Piccadilly circus the old fashioned way!
I've heard of some people who have even gone as far as walking from Leicester Square to Embankment before, but I think that's just crazy talk.
Exactly... No DAVE and no UK History...
Ummm... I think they're the only non terrestrial (analogue) channels I bother watching.
@Stuart Van Onselen
It always amuses me... In the US being called a liberal is an insult...
Odd really, as in the UK it generally means you are middle of the road and quite balanced (well they'd have to be given the previous leaders alcohol intake!).
But they use clubs on seal pups, not hammers...
Mines the white fur one with blood stains.
Last time I dialled 999 in the UK, they asked me the address... Or has Canada gone all IVR now...
Press 1 for Police, 2 for Ambulance... I seem to remember a Simpsons sketch about this...
Not as much fun as my method... For years I've been destroying old hard drives for work... I used to take them apart and use the platters to make wind chimes. Given that most drives stripe data across multiple platters, once they're removed from the spindles and strung together (also involved having some small holes drilled in them), you'd really be hard pushed to get any sense out of them.
However, recently I had a big batch of them which the boss insisted I destroyed completely without any chance of data being recovered, he even asked for proof... Easy... Line the drives up and slice them in half (case and all) with an oxyacetylene cutting torch. Much fun... I took half a drive back to the office and asked if he'd like me to plug it in!
I'll admit thermite would be more spectacular, but with a torch you can be far more creative... I'll see what I can do...
The icon, well come one, it's gotta be hasn't it!
This act is rather concerning...
I, and I'm sure many of you out there in techie land, have files that are encrypted lurking on your harddrive, which we do not have the key too... Many items of software, especially shareware, send you a licence key file which you have to either copy into a specific directory.
So how exactly do the feds determine which files are encrypted and known by you, and which are nothing to do with you really, and you don't have any idea what the key is?
The stupid thing is if you really want to encrypt and hide things, there are many encryption tools available (truecrypt for example) which can create an encrypted volume with multiple keys, which means you can conform to the law and provide the cops with a key, which will open the volume. What they don't realise is there is another key, which will open another volume from the same file where you can hide whatever you like. From the encrypted volume file it is impossible to tell if it contains only the one encrypted collection of files, or if there is a second one hidden in there too.
That's techy pr0n and no mistake!
Funny how everyone is snotty about "only" 60Gb of storage, only a couple of years ago that would have been generous on a laptop!
I would love on, but at the moment my trusty R52 is working fine, so I can't justify it... The X300 just makes me all misty eyed over what is bound to come in a year or two when it does get to upgrade time... *drool*
Only thing I would complain about is the screen. The reviewer seems to think having a widescreen is a plus point... To me they're annoying. I have 1400x1050 of real estate here on the R52, and I like having 1050 vertical. To me laptop with widescreens feel like I'm operating it from inside a post box.
20 a minute?
Wow, I'm impressed by the capacity of his pipe!
It's the one with the Ben Dover film Co logo on the back.
Isn't it amazing...
...that in this day and age, they are still matching people on name only.
Given that it isn't hard to get a fake ID, and therefore a passport, matching on someone's name is pointless to put it mildly. Come to think of it, changing your name by legal methods would probably fox them completely anyway.
Result, the list is pointless.
Needless to say, as I possess a pretty common name, I don't intend on going anywhere near the US of A.
...Back from the pub a tad early today... Or are they wifi enabled?
Does it matter if you change the value by looking at it? At least you know the original value, so you can look at the other side and change it back.
@Lee Sexton, just because something has been developed longer, it doesn't mean it will be cheaper. Mr Rolls and Mr Royce have been making cars longer than Mr Lada....
Of course, silly me... Thanks for pointing that out Mr Vaz, computer games and movies are the cause of all violence in society...
The crusades and Jack the Ripper were caused by a particularly violent Punch and Judy act.
Mr Vaz, the problem is that some people in society have no respect for others. These people have always existed. Maybe if your government hadn't made parents punishing their children for being bad a legal tightrope, the little oiks might have learnt a little respect early on in life.
There's something very important you need to know about mobiles in the UK.
First we have things called NIMBYs, these are moaning characters (usually retired - Think Victor Meldew, assuming you know who he is). They complain that the view from their telescope over the trees at the back have been blighted by an ugly phone mast.
Interestingly they're also the first to complain about lack of signal on their mobile phone.
Personally I'd be more impressed to see some phone coverage provided in the underground, it's damn annoying getting messages delivered 2 hours late (the retry period on some networks seems to be based on geological time) just because you happened to be stuck in a packed tube carriage when someone tried to send it to you... Then again, ringing phones could get annoying... How about just have SMS work?
There is a simple solution to most of this.
Most botnets are used to send spam, the zombied machine connects to whichever server is the MX for a domain, and pretends to be another email server relaying a message for one of it's users.
So by default ISP's should restrict connection to SMTP servers so end user machines cannot connect to any SMTP servers apart from the ones owned by the ISP.
Your run of the mill AOL,Tiscali,BT customer uses the email address that came with the ISP, so they'd be fine. The rest probably use web based systems like gmail/hotmail etc.
The more techy savvy of us, who lets face it aren't really the big risk when it comes to ending up on a botnet, would of course have some kind of web interface on the ISP so we can permit other SMTP servers, or open it up for all. Please note web interface, not a call centre in India! (Done that once this week already thanks!)
It's not as if it's a hard thing to spot from an ISP level. They spend so much cash and technology mangling P2P, it wouldn't take 10 minutes to spot zombie behaviour, nobody normal initiates over a thousand SMTP connection in a day for starters. That would be enough to pass on their details to the sales team and send them an internet security package, or at least some advice on protection!
Worse than that... WiFi capable handsets like the N95 from Orange/Vodafone etc, are crippled at source so apps like Fring can't do voip over WiFi and it has to go over GPRS, which is definitely not something to try when you're roaming!
Unless you happen to change your handset model number to a generic Nokia one, and then flash the handset with a new firmware release... All theory of course... *cough* would never do it *cough* it didn't really work like a charm and save my bacon in a shopping centre in Eastern Europe... *cough*
The speakers are now under the keyboard.
And the reason the keyboard doesn't flex in the middle is because the keyboard's metal backplate is sitting on the top of the 3 big chips and acting as their heatsink! So no cold fingers on a winter night with this little baby!
"The most vulnerable city in the US, according to the study, is New Orleans"
Is there anything of New Orleans left to destroy? last time I checked the worlds richest nation had made bugger all progress in clearing up the flood damage.
Nanny state strikes again...
Don't HM Gov have anything better to do? You know, like selling us further down the river to the US of Europe?
If I buy a couple of tickets for one of these premium events and then find I'm unable to go, why the hell should I be prevented from selling a ticket I cannot use on ebay?
I guess eBay should be able to set a max bid on a ticket, so a ticket cannot be sold above face value, or maybe face value plus 5% to cover the eBay commission. That sounds like a nice middle ground solution to me, although we all know what eBay are like at policing listings. I've lost count how many listings I have reported that have "BMW not Audi not VW not Merc not Ford" in their title. I could give them a regular expression to spot these if I could find someone willing to listen!
As someone else has already mentioned, e-touting is pretty new. I'm sure all the touts can remember how to do it the traditional way in a big coat with large pockets outside the venue. "Pssst, 'ere gov, do you need a ticket?"
If they really want to stop this, surely the thing to do is stop the ticket agents selling 200 tickets to one person in the first place!
Yes and no...
I own two Honda motorcycles, and now it's getting to that time of year again, I know I can toss a coin, pick either once, and start it with ease even after an extended winter holiday.
I also drive an 11 year old German car (BMW) with over 150,000 miles on the clock, which has cost me less than £500 in parts during the last 3 years, a big chunk of that would be the headlamp and radiator that the boulder throwing motorway gritter took out for me last winter. Apart from that it's just been brake pads, filters, oil and a couple of hours of my time servicing it myself. I can't fault it.
I defy their GPS...
... to let me drive into a railway station car park and not explode!
More than likely HM Gov just wanted a copy of the source code that's 10,000 times faster than the version they have.
I bet next time he'll send the PC + phone via DHL a week in advance!
Given the physical size of MicroSD cards these days, you could smuggle who knows how much "restricted" material on something you could hide in your ear!
Not the first time an Apple device does handwriting recognition...
Hope it's better than their earlier attempt... Cue one of my favourite jokes...
Q) How many Apple Newton owners does it take to change a light bulb?
A) Faux! Their to eat lemons, axe gravy soup.
Sorry, it's the one with the Motorola 8500 in the pocket.
"Little attempt is made to verify the authenticity of the passwords"
I'd have given them something that looked like a password for a freebie too.
Hell I've had fake business cards, with fake phone numbers in the past to get freebies at shows and to fob off pushy salesmen!
Must get some more printed...
You've started early this week, it's nowhere near Friday yet!
Just because you can...
Doesn't mean you should!
Make an N95 with a better camera flash, and a better GPS chipset (i.e. one that locks on in under 2 minutes!) and I'll be a happy man.
Oh, and recompile the old carddeck games so they run on S60 rev 3! I'm sure you'll find more calls for that on various blogs than you will for "I wanna watch tele!".
I love that phrase...
"A small proportion..."
Whenever I see that, I read "99.9%"
Can we have a show of hands? How about an El Reg vote?
Another gutsy little CPU and nice device dragged to a screaming halt by a huge bloated OS.
You only have to look at the Eee to see what you can do with a nice light OS, for a fraction of the price. No hard drive required!
Now if only the made an Eee phone....
But does it...
Automatically adjust the truss rod to keep the action nice and low, but avoid buzzing the frets?
Mine the one with the Ibanez logo on the back
Call that rare?
I'll happily eat some beans and sell them to you for £100 per 100g... But you'll have to fish them out from the U-bend yourself!
... that O2 only have two classes of customer...
1) Techie nerds (us lot)
2) Gullible Joe Public
Needless to say they don't like us, because we're the ones that poke holes in their contracts, question their adverts and report them to the ASA.
Missed opportunity there...
"The BBC said in reply it had "taken note" of Ofcom's findings"
Anyone with a sense of humour would have told them to "fuck off!"
Sorry, mines the one with the feed the world patch on the back.
Hardly a shock...
...given that Tiscali's network is barely capable of handling the traffic they currently have.
And their technical support can barely handle the levels of lying and misinformation required to fob off people reporting problems.
Haha, I'm not scared...
I keep my passport under my tin-foil hat!
Let's face it, have you ever seen any sign of a Govn dept, or their advisers, that had the faintest clue about anything IT related?
Every time they open their mouths and say something about IT related stuff it's a laugh a minute. It's like trying to bluff that you speak fluent Polish to your plumber... He's gonna spot you're full of sh*t the moment you open your mouth.
"Wasn't Zune the I-pod "Killer" and I'm sure we've have other iphone "killer" statements on here in the past.. its all getting rather tedious."
There's a difference... Microsoft weren't an mp3 player manufacturer.
Nokia *ARE* a phone manufacturer.
So they know a thing or two about the global communications game.
In contrast Apple were a computer/mp3 player manufacturer who tried to make a phone, and although they made a lovely user interface (which they know all about), they kinda missed the target on the phone side of things (especially compared to what non-US customers are used to). Price too steap, Camera too cheap, MMS functionality missing etc etc. You only have to look at the sales figures to see that.
I'm really not sure what to make of this...
I think it must be good news, as Tiscali's service just couldn't get any worse!
The only problem with that is sometimes it's impossible to know who to ask!
Someone who's not got the brains to configure wep/wpa isn't going to manage to change the SSID from the default "Netgear".
Plus even if they did, would you put your address on as the SSID, which might attract someone with a van and a habit of long term borrowing of equipment in the middle of the night?
Given that most routers supplied by ISPs, Sky, BT etc, are all WEPed up when they arrive, I would argue that an open wifi point has been deliberately left open as a service to the community.
Actually El Reg, Microsoft have not denied they are working with Lite-on to develop a BR drive for the xBox.
They have denied that Lite-on are manufacturing Blu-ray drives for the xBox. Note present tense.
They didn't say Lite-on weren't developing, nor that Lite-on would be making them in the future, just that they weren't at the time you ask (possibly because it was night in Taiwan and they'd all gone home).
I think you could be right...
Ah, the good old ISA slot...
Look at that font... 8x8 pixel char grid all in caps...
Where's the truetype fonts with anti-aliasing, I thought the USA was supposed to be advanced?!
It's the big white one with the jetpack on the back.
...the BBC had already given them a home, last week's Watchdog had a BBC Micro used several times during their seg on fake websites!
- JLaw, Kate Upton exposed in celeb nude pics hack
- Google flushes out users of old browsers by serving up CLUNKY, AGED version of search
- GCHQ protesters stick it to British spooks ... by drinking urine
- Page File Love XKCD? Love science? You'll love a book about science from Randall Munroe
- Facebook to let stalkers unearth buried posts with mobe search