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* Posts by Steve Evans

2300 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007

Nokia passes buck over Greenpeace eco rating reduction

Steve Evans
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So...

Lenovo doesn't get pushed back as it's Chinese factories will be running on electricity produced by some very nasty coal power stations?

Missed that one didn't you Greenpeace.

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EU wants data sharing network for driving offences

Steve Evans
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Ummm...

"There will be no wriggling out using the 'I wasn't driving' defence, as the driver will have to name the person who was driving at the time."

Just like Neil Hamilton and his wife didn't wriggle out at all by saying "To be honest m'lord it was a long drive, we took it in turns, we have no idea who was at the wheel in that town"... Oh, actually they did didn't they.

I love how simplistic the plan sounds sounds, however we've had the ability to "roam" with our car insurance to mainland Europe for many years, but God help you if you actually have to make a claim! I'm sure the EU will need at least another thousand pen pushers to maintain this system too.

That concern aside, anything that can enforce our high driving standards whilst Johnny foreigner is mowing down grannies is a good thing.

Let's start by enforcing Tacho hours on all the trucks shall we, and how about making them pay some kind of road tax, like the Swiss do if you want to use their motorways. We can rape their wallets whilst all the illegals are being nuked by our x-ray machines at the port.

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BBC Micro creators meet to TRACE machine's legacy

Steve Evans
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@Rich Bryant

Errr, I am a real person, and I managed to beg a BBC from my parents (who are also real people who lived in a 3 bed semi).

I took great please in upgrading it to a 'B' myself, soldering iron in hand...

Ahhh... fond memories... The 6522 I/O controller, the 8271 disc controller chip which was almost impossible to find at times... Making funny shapes in mode7 with teletext graphics...

You know what, I'm gonna have to plug it in tonight!

(Anyone know the life expectancy of an 80 track 5.25" floppy?)

I assume this Science museum thing is the reason I couldn't get to the computer section on Saturday when I was up there... Grrrr!

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Steve Evans
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@Pete Smith

Terribly geeky... Except mode 0-2 all used 20k of your 32, not 16...

Mode0 640x256 (2 colour) used 1 byte to store 8 pixels, so that's 640x256/8=20480

The clever bit about Elite is it ran the screen in two modes and actually switched the video controller (6845 I think) mid screen scan!

The wireframe space view was mode0 (640x256 2 colour), the radar at the bottom that needed colours was mode1 (320x256 4 colour).

VDU23,230,24,60,90,255,24,36,66,36

:-)

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So what's the easiest box to hack - Vista, Ubuntu or OS X?

Steve Evans
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@John Doe

Very very true...

Email: Please click the link below to see naked pictures of [insert celeb here]

celebpics.jpg.exe

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Mobile termination fees go to Competition Commission

Steve Evans
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My personal fave...

When a UK Orange phone is roaming in France, it was actually cheaper to make a call when roamed onto any other network, than when roamed onto Orange Fr!

Both of whom are owned by France Telecom...

Now tell me again how this isn't blatant profiteering again, I keep forgetting!

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UK postal vote system 'not fit for purpose'

Steve Evans
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Coat

Don't worry...

Non of our politicians are fit for purpose either, so it cancels out!

It's the fleece with the bobble hat in the pocket.

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Steve Evans
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How about...

...taking a leaf out of some other countries books and allowing voting in person to be carried out over several days... Maybe including (brace yourself, this is going to be a shocker) a non-working day! (Told you it was a shocker).

Why the hell we have to vote on a Thursday really is beyond me... What genius came up with this? I guess it was a polling official that didn't want to work on a weekend.

Sort it out, I work away during the working week, and cannot possibly vote any other way than by post (not that there really is much choice between all the crooks bar the different colour rosettes).

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China has world's largest online population

Steve Evans
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I guess...

... it depends on how you count people as "Online", at the moments none of them can get on youtube unless they pull a bit of techno giggery pokery.

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Google claims 'non-existent' Android beats everything but the Jesus Phone

Steve Evans
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Errrr...

"software developers will love its "non-existent" Android handset just as much as they love the iPhone"

Software developers love the locked down iPhone, the one who's SDK is only now poking it's head above water?

Well I never knew that.

Now if they were saying "software developers will love its "non-existent" Android handset just as much as they love the Symbian", now that would actually make some sense!

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Afghan networks start nightly shutdown

Steve Evans
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@Niall

Or maybe they got fed up walking about at night and having a phone ring in their pocket mid-silent-stalk!

Guys, press and hold the # key, thay'll toggle most modern nokias at least!

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Asus CEO: Eee PC to get HDD options, Intel Atom CPU

Steve Evans
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Pleeeeease...

... Asus, do something about the analogue modem situation.

The 701 has an RJ11 plug with no circuitry behind it, and finding a Linux friendly USB modem (at least in the UK) seems impossible.

You aim the 701 at the new/casual user, so why do you seem to assume they are going to have a wifi enabled broadband router? I personally know of 3 pensioners who would buy one tomorrow for casual email and a bit of web if only it could do dial up.

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Quake rocks Britain

Steve Evans
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Paris Hilton

Eh? What? When?

Well I've been up working all night, and here in Essex I haven't even suspected a HGV of doing some rather late deliveries, let alone been shaken from my bed or watched tins of beans making a bid for freedom!

How anyone in London can claim to have felt it with the night buses running I will never know!

Paris, well she might have made the earth move for someone.

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Taliban demand night-time cell tower shutdown

Steve Evans
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Sounds like a good opportunity here...

1) Turn the light off on the tower, and disable the log on authentication. Taleban think it's safe to leave mobiles on and G Dubya tracks them down.

2) (my personal favourite) Place mines round all the towers, and make the flashing light really noticeable.

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Toshiba Portégé R500 slimline laptop

Steve Evans
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Jobs Horns

@Paul van der Lingen

I think you'll find that the hardware does matter.

Apple have a nasty habit of sacrificing things purely to get "a look". Throwing things like the ethernet out because it would "compromise the lines man", is just daft.

IIRC wasn't there an Apple box that had all it's air vents on the top so not only could you spill a drink straight into the guts, but putting a folder on the top of the case was enough to cook it!

What next week, the Apple Blanco ultra-mobile, even lighter than the Air, but to keep the weight down it has no display?

And no I'm not a windoze fanatic, even my laptop (a chunky R52 thinkpad) is dual-booted with linux. Why dual? For practicality and flexibility, words missing from the book of Jobs.

I file Apple along with the X-factor and all that kind of thing, it's all about image and very little to do with depth/substance/longevity. Who else would come up with a circular mouse, and consumer electronics with a non-user swappable battery.

Damn, now look, you've got me started on the iPhone!

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Samsung laptop battery burns

Steve Evans
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You would have thought...

That with modern Li-ion batteries giving all sorts of info to the OS, like date of first charge, remaining capacity and current temperature, it would be a simple addition to either make them safely shutdown the OS in the event of overheat, or more brutally disconnect themselves from the charging circuit.

After all a sudden power off shutdown of windows might loose some data, but not as much as a bonfire.

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Eye-o-Sauron™ man-tracker masts now fully online, says DHS

Steve Evans
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@Peter Leech

Actually yes... And you can do it!

The trick is to move very very smoothly (and slowly of course).

The big question is, have they thought about below ground? Those pesky migrant workers might have experience with shovels... eeeck!

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Vista SP1 kills and maims security apps, utilities

Steve Evans
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Gates Horns

Isn't it odd...

...that all the packages seem to be security related, the one thing that windows really really really is in need of?!

I'm starting to wonder if Bill G is running an email botnet in his new extended spare time!

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UK rattles 'three strikes' filesharing sabre (again)

Steve Evans
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@AC

The bypassing of the courts is worrying.

The record industry have a great record of failing to identify a user by IP. Grannies in the states hauled up for downloading gangster rap for example.

So when they do get it wrong, and you get 3 strikes, who do you appeal to? ISPs like Tiscali have a pitiful record of customer support, and that's just when you want to use your internet connection for something simple, like browsing the web!

I think BBC's Watchdog had better go nightly!

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Steve Evans
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@Eitsop

Encryption and all that sort of thing won't help with the methods they are using.

The way they work is like this...

1) Do a torrent search for one of their artists

2) Start downloading this torrent with their favourite bittorrent client.

3) Look at the peers they have. Write down the IPs.

4) Check the IP ranges against the ISP list they have

5) Fire off letter to ISP with IP date, time and the details of the torrent.

I assume (hope) that they do bother to verify the content of the torrent before sending off the letters.

However, there are of course ways to avoid this... Block lists. Most good bittorrent clients support one or more.

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Aliens seize control of Daily Telegraph

Steve Evans
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Coat

Oh dear...

I think they infringed at least 12 Nintendo trademarks there!

It's the straight jacket and the hat with the propeller.

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Miami cops trial 'hover and stare' ducted-fan Dalek

Steve Evans
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Ummm...

Petrol engine, so not exactly stealth mode... And it falls out of the air after an hour when the fuel runs out?

Surely they would be better off with a great big long pole, some gaffer tape and an HD video camera? Or is that too cheap and stealthy for the cops?

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MayDay! MayDay! Ruskies reinvent cyber crime

Steve Evans
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@Andrew Crystall

Grey listing shouldn't dump any legit email, all it would do is delay it for an hour or two. A real email server will just retry later.

It's no different to when a destination SMTP server gets swamped, they send out a "busy, try later" reply then too. It's a perfectly legit part of the SMTP protocol.

If legit email is getting lost due to an SMTP server saying "busy, come back later" then it's a problem with the sending mail server not correctly handling this.

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Price, not format war fears, holds back Blu-ray, says survey

Steve Evans
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Well...

Of course price plays a part... Sony appear to have learnt little from the VHS/Betamax issue in the early days of VCR. Betamax was technically superior, and was still used in professional circles until digital replaced it. However it's licensing was extortionate and JVC came up with VHS for the consumer for a far more reasonable sum.

Having said all that, I suspect the main reason would be that most people, including myself, don't actually see a problem with good old DVD. Many of us (again, including myself), are still happy with the reliable old CRT in the front room!

Hell, mines not even wide-screen!

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Oz teen elephant pregnancy sparks protests

Steve Evans
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Stop

@Pete

I agree totally.

If she was capable of getting pregnant, then surely she will be capable of delivering a baby Nelly.

It's nature after all, these people need to learn to stop applying human morals to animals. I'm sure in the wild a 9 year old Nelly would have had the boys sniffing round her behind on more than one occasion.

The only reason the human age is set at 16 is so the parents can learn how to write and fill in their social security forms correctly. There's no biological reason for it, as has been proved many times in Basildon.

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Internet s&x auction ends in pregnancy, legal feud

Steve Evans
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@Anonymous Coward

27!

Yeee Gods!

I've often heard the joke about German children going to school, college, then university, and when they finally leave university they pick up their pension on the way out, but I didn't know it was really that bad!

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Comcast cops to BitTorrent busting

Steve Evans
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Very curious...

Given that the simplest method of looking after a network is to just throttle traffic, it's odd that they go out of their way to get/make a system that injects fake tcp packets to knock out the customers application.

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FBI issues prosthetic pregnant belly bomb alert

Steve Evans
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Flame

They missed a trick...

Get a 11 stone terrorist and sticking him in a sumo suit full of semtex would be far more effective. He'll pass off as a burger loving infidel easily.

Flammable icon seems ideal.

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How believable are government claims on ID cards?

Steve Evans
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@Steve Davies

Exactly...

"ID cards prevent terrorism" Just like they did in Spain the other year.

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Germans to blast fish into space

Steve Evans
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When I saw the headline...

i thought they were sending some of that tinned Swedish fish up to see it's effect in a combined space!

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Brazilian cleaner spots security hole in Heathrow e-borders

Steve Evans
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Good greif...

How did these idiots get to run a country, they can't even implement basic security!

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Billg quits Facebook

Steve Evans
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@Chris

"Just goes to show how daft the 'friends' concept is on social networking sites. People collect them as badges of honour to validate their pitiful existence and give meaning to their empty, howling souls."

I concur. I have a golden rule on Facebook, call me old fashioned, but If I've never met someone in the flesh (oooh errr), then they don't go on my friends list.

My brother on the other hand is the kind of "friend whore" you describe, and spends most of his time buried under application invites from his "friends". Me I'm brutal with the delete button even on real friends if they forward stupid things, this even extended to my sister in-law when she was the 3rd person to send the "Facebook need you to forward this message to prove your profile is active" message a few months back. I still haven't reinstated her!

As for Bill spending up to half an hour a day... Blimee, his PC must be running faster than mine! I wonder what version of Linux he's running?

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Orange France iPhone total hits 90,000

Steve Evans
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@KOOLAID drinker

And a better camera, with a flash.

And better support for MMS

And a battery you can change without having to loose the phone for a week as it bounces across the globe in a Jiffi bag!

And a lower price!

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New England Patriots victims of trademark hubris

Steve Evans
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Alert

Oh yes it's such an unusual event...

Until you remove your head from your arse (ass) and look at the outside world...

19-0 is a perfectly reasonable score in Rugby for example. If that happened to be an England vs France match, then would we be prevented from rubbing

Gaelic noses in it from our T-shirts because of a ill-conceived US granted Patent?

Google for "19-0", there's plenty of previous examples... Although I do have to feel a little pity for the sucker who paid up for www.19-0.org.

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Skype squishes cross-zone scripting bug

Steve Evans
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@Matthew...

I was just thinking the same thing whilst watching it crawl in at 66KB/s *yawn*

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Turning a Nokia phone into a hotspot

Steve Evans
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@Jolyon Ralph

Firefox has plug-ins that allow you to set a custom user-agent yourself... Plus half a dozen local PC privacy proxies will strip/change this.

As for ending up with it rendered in tiny mobile mode when you pretend to be a mobile app, just pretend to by Opera Mini, from what I've seen when I use it on my N95, it gets a full normal site and then renders it locally to suit the mobile.

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Brit scientists brew up three-parent embryo

Steve Evans
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Wooo there...

Have these loons thought about the implications?

Can you imagine what the family tree is gonna look like when their great great great grand children end up on BBC212 trying to trace their ancestors?

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Steve Evans
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Coat

@Mathew Holleran

Even worse than that...

Given this is to solve hereditary diseases, there's bugger all chance of the two lady's being twins!

Mine's the snowboard jacket and floppy eared beanie hat.

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Dutch fire up petrol-pumping robot

Steve Evans
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Flame

lmao!

Gotta love the 1970's porn movie soundtrack!

"What is it doing with that nossil?!"

I hope it has some kind of visual correction for the database, or can we look forward to every chav car that's been dropped on the deck getting it's rear quarter window punched out and the back seat covered in petrol?

Now I'd pay to see that!

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Remembering the Coleco Adam

Steve Evans
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I see your RS-128

And raise you the contents of my attic... (A quick look reveals...)

2 x Einsteins

1 x 4032 Commodore Pet

1 x ZX81 (with after market real keyboard add-on)

2 x BBC Micros, both with 80 track (200k wooo) 5.25" floppy drives.

Annoyingly I can't see the Osborne 1. I know I had one once, and would have thought it would be too big/heavy to loose, but somehow I seem to have managed it.

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Microhoo! marriage hits Google salaries hard

Steve Evans
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Errrr...

So after reading several lines of marketing/hr spin-speak, I found my technically aligned brain disconnecting from my eyeballs and trying to sneak out the door.

Did anyone make it to the bottom of that job description and work out what they are actually after?

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All blue-eyed people share one common ancestor

Steve Evans
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Dead Vulture

@theotherone

"it's a popular misconception that Hitler had brown eyes"

Well well, who would have believed it, I actually learnt something in the registers comments!

Thanks for that.

Does this mean the 2 pickled brown Hitler eyes I won on ebay are fake then?

Dammmmit!

Dead vulture? Well cos it looks like it's had its eyes removed!

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Steve Evans
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@theotherone

Not quite sure what you mean by we're all related to Hitler... You do realise he had brown eyes don't you? (And was Austrian I believe).

He just realised that everyone should worship the blue eyed overlords a little early!

Now buy me a beer or I shall use my mutant blue eyed evil stare a second time.

(Does anyone know how to get the laser bit to work?)

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Rocket train smashes world land-speed record

Steve Evans
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Paris Hilton

Errr

Not quite sure how much use this is... Sure it's big number (woooo), but I for one wouldn't be tricked by the

"Would you mind standing in the helium tunnel for a second" trick if they wanted to shoot me, nor would I appreciate having to wear breathing equipment for a trip on Eurostar!

Paris, well anything is quick compared to her!

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Is this the world's most expensive desktop PC?

Steve Evans
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@Sam

As you say, the gold is probably rather thick for the bling value...

Which makes me wonder...

How heavy is this thing! The shipping might be more than the PC!

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Submarine cable cut torpedoes Middle East access

Steve Evans
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Take that...

..Osama! Think you can use the infidels internet to plot your attacks.

Think again!

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MPs slam costly war-tech projects at MoD

Steve Evans
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@Anonymous Coward

<quote>

"I'm so scared of aging migs and su fighters.

We could just get some f-18 and f-22's if that were even a remotely plausable problem."

</quote>

You should be... The Russians haven't just sat still either you know, IIRC, their air to air missiles are actually longer range than the American ones.

As for getting some help from the USA, we've only just finished paying for them helping us out the last time thank you very much! And even then they turned up late.

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Forget passports - teachers and kids are the new ID card targets

Steve Evans
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Black Helicopters

Hmmm...

"it seems on the point of abandoning the notion of forcing ID cards onto the public via passport renewals."

Indeed... Why force people to get them with passports, when you can get far greater coverage by requiring them to open a bank account, change doctor or buy toilet rolls?

(Toilet rolls theory yet to be backed up by leak, but I wouldn't put it past HM Gov!)

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Apple's iPhone numbers do not add up

Steve Evans
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@Steve Renouf

I don't think many brits are nipping over to France to get unlocked iPhones, cos I don't think many people are bothered about the iPhone at all! All the massaging of the sales figures can't hide this!

I was in an O2 shop on their launch night, I used the late opening as a chance to get some free parking and buy a microSD for my phone before going on a trip, and the O2 shop were the cheapest high street source.

It wasn't exactly busy!

Sure the iPhone looks very flash, but as a phone it is seriously lacking in features the European market has come to expect. Plus the idea of actually having to buy a phone *with* a contract is just so last century!

It's just a case of Apple not understanding the difference in market (or maybe just not caring).

However, the iPod touch is a completely different story. The UI is gorgeous (as it is on the iPhone), but the product is an mp3 player with added browsing, and it does everything very nicely. I suspect that as the iPhone is only a barely passable phone, people that like the UI will now just buy an iPod touch and stick to their free Nokia phones with real MMS messaging and good cameras.

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Steve Evans
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Jobs Horns

@Giles Jones

I'm with you on that one.

Given the kicking Apple has been receiving for low sales, they are bounded to be quoting "shipped", not sold.

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