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* Posts by Steve Evans

2361 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007

Pope pooh-poohs airport perv-scanners

Steve Evans
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I'm confused...

Is that a list of rules handed down from the Pope or from HM Gov?

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Vodafone Ireland admits pocketing dormant PAYG cash

Steve Evans
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Depends...

It depends how you define emergency. You don't even need a SIM to dial 999, and I'm sure a lady in distress will get away with a 999 call to say her car has broken down in a dark country lane far more easily than a man would.

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MPs obsess about expenses, ignore data security

Steve Evans
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</title>

If I remember correctly, you can buy a film to put on a laptop screen that undoes all that R&D that went on to increase the viewing angle.

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Another NHS hospital stricken with Conficker virus

Steve Evans
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Actually...

In a round about way a larger monitor can slow down a PC...

Larger monitor = higher resolution, which will work the graphics card a bit harder... If the machine is one of those nasty cheap designs with shared video and system ram, the ram used for the extra pixels is memory not available for windows to much on.

However I agree that most users shouldn't be trusted with anything more than a left click.

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Ex-Army man cracks popular security chip

Steve Evans
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Errrr

"They have a right to do it, but I have a right to break it too."

I have a nagging suspicion that the DMCA specifically says you *don't* have the right to break it!

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Note to Captain Kirk: Warp speed will kill you

Steve Evans
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Shurely...

Surely the drag of all these atoms bouncing off the hull would prove to be a bigger problem before they reach a high enough velocity to cause themselves damage... Not to mention the sand blasting effect it would have on the extra expense metallic paint finish!

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Oxford snaps high-speed movies with consumer cams

Steve Evans
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Hmmm

Can't believe this hasn't been thought of/patented before.

Then again they do say that the best ideas are often the simplest.

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Windows Phone 7 Series website collapses under weight of traffic

Steve Evans
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Hmmm...

My thoughts exactly...

As the old marketing man says, there is no such thing as bad publicity... Although Toyota might have just disproved than!

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Westminster politicos told to grasp Vista nettle

Steve Evans
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I assume...

I assume this short sited knee jerk has occurred because they notice Win2k support will stop in a couple of weeks... My question is why are they concerned about support being dropped by M$?

They insist on continuing to use IE6, which is a far bigger security risk than anything Win2k could reveal in the next few years.

Of course the next issue is going to be the hardware demands of Vista compared to XP... Stand by for loads of memory purchases to go winging their way to the original PC suppliers, and not to anywhere sensible (and far cheaper) like Crucial.

Actually, what am I thinking, they won't upgrade the memory, they'll just order a 1000 Vista update licences, find the machines don't have the guts, so order 1000 new machine (which come with Vista already), then hide the initial wasted Vista purchase under the bed.

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Frosty fanbois navigate iPhone with sausage

Steve Evans
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Joke

<title></title>

Surely you mean not the bratwurst?

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Wreck of 1930s flying aircraft carrier dubbed 'historic'

Steve Evans
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Choose your accident...

I think the chances of surviving an airship accident are higher than surviving a jet aircraft accident.

Even the famous Hindenburg accident had > 60% survival rate.

36 died (13 passengers, 22 crew, 1 ground crew), 62 survivors.

Airships might spark up in most impressive style, but jets tend to hit thing (mountains, the ground etc) at rather higher speeds.

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Red Dwarf's Kryten exposes iPhone number

Steve Evans
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There are two reasons you should not do that...

1) You'll get phone calls from weird fans

2) You'll get phone calls from weird fans.

I thought it was such an important point it deserved mentioning twice.

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Linus Torvalds doesn't hate the Googlephone

Steve Evans
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Yes and no...

Very few companies bother to publish the level of pollution/energy required to produce a car in the first place, and dispose of the old one.

I doubt many cars could challenge my old bus when it comes to fossil carbon emissions, mine easily embarrasses a Prius (and I don't just mean when I use the brakes!)... One of the beauties of an old car (diesel) is they have a very simple injection system which can take a lot of abuse. In my case the abuse comes in the shape of recycled vegetable oil... Smells a bit funny, but far cheaper than the ever climbing fuel prices in the UK.

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Steve Evans
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Actually...

I never said everyone drives a new car, only expressed shock that Linus didn't...

Just for the record my car is even greener than John White's (above), at 13 years old and containing a bio-degradable paper based navigation system.

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Steve Evans
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More shocking...

More shocking is that Linus has a car without GPS!

What ancient wreck is he driving about in? I thought pretty much every car had sat nav these days?!

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Cheeky French hackers hijack Tata website

Steve Evans
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The title is required, and must contain letters and/or digits.

Not sure that's English English, American hackers perhaps?! :o)

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iPad forces operators to shave their SIMs

Steve Evans
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Sounds like a cunning lock in...

Once you have your iPad with its micro SIMM you won't be able to use another mobile device, even if your iPad goes wrong, your SIMM won't fit any of your other phones!

Quick, someone invent an adapter! Although it's my idea and you'll need to licence it.

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Facebook re-write takes PHP to an enterprise past

Steve Evans
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Well...

Just as long as they manage to fix the ever growing URL bug that seems to curse me the moment I try to tag a photograph and requires a manual cropping in the address bar to get things back to a vaguely normal point.

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Apple vs the iPad Bedwetters

Steve Evans
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Ironically...

Although I really don't like Apple and their control freak nature (or own any of their products), I feel forcing the arty farty web designers (usually Apple customers) to actually write some HTML instead of just throwing the entire "presentation" into a high bandwidth Flash based website is actually a good thing!

Long live St Jobs and his dislike of all thing Flashy!

For anyone who missed it, check out Charlie Brooker's "opinion" :-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEfcy_u0-YM

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ASA bites PETA over Baby P billboard

Steve Evans
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Ummm...

Actually he wasn't. In the 1930s Hitler enjoyed and promoted "English" country "sports" such as fox hunting and game shooting and was partial to stuffed pigeon.

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Retailers fooled by fake and borrowed IDs

Steve Evans
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Ah, the old right of passage...

Still remember borrowing a driving licence (no picture on them back then) and using it to get into my first nightclub. Got the 3rd degree from the doorman, "date of birth?", "when did you pass your test?" and the old favourite "What star sign are you?"

I managed to remember it all, but must admit I was crapping myself!

After all that the night club was shite, no idea what age group it was supposed to impress, but it didn't work on a sub 18 me!

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Chris Morris jihad film good to go

Steve Evans
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Thumb Up

Brilliant!

Let's hope this gets past the thought police and released!

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PM: UK airports to get perv scanners next week

Steve Evans
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Re: It's not so bad

Do you often find invasive security checks that stimulating?

If so I'm sure you could request the full body cavity search.

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Steve Evans
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Hmmm...

At some of the small airports like Grenoble the luggage x-ray is right behind the check-in desk and if they see something amusing they call their mates over and put the bag through again. So now when I'm flying from there I try to arrange any cables I have in my luggage into a smiley face.

So I was wondering if I cut out letters of aluminium (aluminum) foil and stick them to my body, can I write messages for them?

"The guy behind me looks shifty"

"These are not the droid you are looking for"

etc.

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Car-stopping electropulse cannon to demo 'next month'

Steve Evans
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Re: brake/steering failure

Power assisted steering is incredibly heavy on modern cars with their low profile tyres if the assistance stops. Now imagine you are fleeing from the feds at speed down a bendy road when they hit you with the zapper.

Having an automatic gearbox (like most Americans) you have little engine braking, so think you'll bail out and run once you're out of view round the next corner. You hit the bend expecting the steering to be nice and light, and it isn't, you don't have time to grab the wheel with both hands at 6 o'clock and start manually heaving it round before the car/tree interaction occurs. Sure it still works, but even if you were expecting the new super heavy weight you can't spin it from lock to lock in anywhere near the couple of seconds you could when it was assisted.

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Opera and Firefox downloads soar after IE alerts

Steve Evans
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Probably quite good too...

The last thing we need is the population starting to think uk.gov has a single clue about IT.

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Air France offers two-seat deal for fatties

Steve Evans
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Odd...

I'm 6 foot and 33" inside leg, and I can handle a Fly n scare trip okay.

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MS spins IE security disaster into Windows 7 upgrade opportunity

Steve Evans
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Gates Horns

If XP + IE6 is so bad...

Odd they didn't mention you can just go download IE8 for free and stick it on your XP machine.

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Man Utd imposes social networking ban

Steve Evans
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Indeed...

The idea of Wayne Rooney dragging his knuckles across the keyboard is just too funny for words!

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Discrimination warning over airport body scanners

Steve Evans
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Re: Political Correctness gone mad!!!

Not at all, please don't try to tar me with any bigot brush, it won't stick.

Did the lorry drivers in Yorkshire complain when they were getting regularly stopped during the hunt for the Yorkshire ripper, because the profile suggested he was a lorry driver? Did they scream that no lorry drivers were being stopped in Kent? Did they demand bus drivers be stopped too? No, they understood the logic and the need to find him.

If an Englishman is suspected of a crime when I am on abroad, and the cops decide to question me, will I scream that no French people are being picked up? No, don't be stupid, I'd understand the logic.

Would I expect the local cops to waste their time picking up Germans, French, Poles and Spaniards just to make me feel better? No, I'd rather they found the person they were looking for.

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Steve Evans
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Stop

Grrr!

Sod the PC crap, can we please use our brains. I'm sorry but our current terrorist threat comes from religious extremists who are generally non-white.

Back when the IRA were attacking the UK mainland, people with Irish names or Irish car registrations would be stopped more frequently. This was common sense, but these day we can't use the same sense as those determined to blow us up just happen to be from a different ethnic group.

If this PC crap continues to hamper and restrict investigations it won't be long before black women are being asked for DNA to assist in the investigation of a rape where the suspect was described as a white male, purely because focusing on white males would be profiling...

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No World Cup anthem for England football heroes

Steve Evans
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Coat

Hmmm....

You never know, it's not like there would be much point in her singing for Scotland is there...

Mines the one with earplugs in the pocket

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China's doomed attempt to hold the world to ransom

Steve Evans
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Interesting...

Except I have to point out one thing... As you say "Technology moves on"...

CRT Phosphors Granddad!!!

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Lightning catches up with Thunderbird

Steve Evans
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Yup...

And even better than M$ has ever managed, it really is English, not American!

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Next-gen iPhone rumored for April

Steve Evans
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Oh dear...

No mention of a flash on the damn camera then?

I wonder if Facebook could implement an automatic block of "Uploaded via facebook mobile for iphone" notifications instead, I'm fed up with my "friends" continually uploading silhouettes of people!

Please, please add a flash, even a little LED flash would do. The fact it has gone on without one for some long is just a joke.

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European court pulls plugs on terror stop and search

Steve Evans
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What a load of bull...

Policing and Security Minister David Hanson MP said: ”Stop and search under section 44 of the Terrorism Act 2000 is an important tool in a package of measures in the ongoing fight against terrorism."

Oh really... Would he like to back this up by telling us the total number of terrorists that have been found by completely random stop and searches... Let me take a wild guess at how many... A big round zero.

Very important then...

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Steve Evans
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And...

Cameras... Don't forget the evil insidious photographers out there that must be stopped!

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Orange rolls into the banking business

Steve Evans
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Gotta laugh...

I received one of the Barclaycards with the Oyster built in last year.

For a couple of minutes I was actually quite impressed by the level of integration (and data mining potential) they had achieved.

Then after reading between the lines of the enclosed spin, I realised that it was no more integrated than me gluing my existing Oyster card to the back of an old credit card. I still had to go to the Oyster site and set up the auto top up by entering my credit card number.

So went happily back to using my same old Oyster (never registered, always topped up with cash). I don't mind them collecting anonymous travel data, I'm just prefer to make sure it is anonymous.

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Sarko gets crypto mobe after BlackBerry ban

Steve Evans
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Normal service...

The French are well known for looking after their own industry, so implementing a ban on products produced outside of the country is normal. They did exactly the same with the SECAM TV system. Everyone else went for PAL or NTSC. The Eastern block countries got SECAM because it would prevent the Poles et al from accidentally picking up the news from Germany and other bad Western countries.

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UK prosecutors drop 'tiger' sex video case

Steve Evans
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Paris Hilton

Stand by...

Any time now they'll be a new law along...

Possessing Extreme porn offensive to deaf people.

Paris, no explanation required.

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25kg of cocaine hits Spanish supermarket shelves

Steve Evans
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So....

Does this mean the banana will now become the El Reg unit of measurement for drugs?

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Orange punts quality calling

Steve Evans
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Pah!

I'd just be happy with a signal in my house.

It used to be fine.

Then about a year ago it got worse... A month or two later I got a text message telling me that they had performed some modifications to my local cell and I should notice an improvement in the signal.

It's been the same crap level ever since.

I can move the phone 2 inches on the table and it will go from 2 bars to nothing. Earlier today as I picked it up it had 4, I looked in disbelief, and then they all vanished.

Oh, and I'm talking old 2G signal here, let's not even go near the 3G signal level!

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Today is not New Year's Eve - or the end of the decade

Steve Evans
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(why does a reply need a title?)

That's correct. Isn't that what he said?

year divisible by 4 = leap year

Unless it's divisible by 100 = not leap year

Unless it's divisible by 400 = leap year.

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Yorkshire lass eBays cheating boyf's Xmas prezzies

Steve Evans
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Hmmm...

So they split up on the 22nd, so how comes she has the presents he bought for her?

Sounds a bit odd to me too...

Plus technically if he bought them, and never gave them to her, then they are not hers to sell... Aka theft.

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The best (of the worst) patent claims of 2009

Steve Evans
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Haha...

I love how Apple's glove has to solve a problem that they have created. Resistive touch screens work fine when you touch them with anything, only capacitive ones, like the ones used in the iPhone, object to being touched by non conducting objects and require a glove with holes cut in it!

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5-megapix 'iPhone 4' set for June?

Steve Evans
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Not sure...

I know 3 people with iPhones... One is a complete fanboy, so of course he wouldn't tell me if he ever had a problem, but I did laugh when he dropped it and cracked the screen.

The other two are girls who just bought it because it was the "in thing", neither of them are technical. One constantly complains about it freaking out and doing weird shit (in her words she hates it) and the other seems to have an iPhone (or maybe O2) induced text message delay. I've sat there next to her this week, both with a good signal and sent messages between my Nokia and her iPhone. Sometimes they arrive instantly, other times they take a few minutes. In one case a message took 2 hours, and sometimes they've just gone missing. Messages from her to me turn up pretty much as you'd expect, within a few seconds.

Now I don't know if this in a problem with the Orange/O2 interconnect or whatever, but until I proved this to her in person (and showed her my sent history) she thought I'd been ignoring her!

The iPhone is bad for your social life!

Sure the iPhone has a great interface, but I still don't trust the technical bit underneath it all. The half hearted attempt they made of implementing the SMS functionality in version 1 is enough to make me worry.

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Steve Evans
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But...

Are they gonna put a damn flash on it this time, or are we doomed to spend the rest of our lives looking at mobile upload pictures in facebook with really badly lit faces?

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Ofcom sets 60GHz free

Steve Evans
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Until...

It rains!

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Fujitsu workers picket London HQ

Steve Evans
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Scrooge outfit?

You sure?

If I were him I'd keep well away from Stockwell tube station!

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Iraqi insurgents hack US drones with $26 software

Steve Evans
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Grenade

Genius...

What idiot doesn't encrypt military signals... Oh, hang on, you answered that.

I'm unsure how useful being able to view the feed is. Oh so you can see if the drone is coming for you without having to look up at the sky, big deal. If it's heading for you you're f*cked. If you run it just draws attention to you and you're f*cked.

Having a collection of recording from previous missions just sounds like a macabre youtube... Link?

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