Feeds

* Posts by Steve Evans

2361 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007

Paris Hilton meets bikers, opens up... wallet

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re Ahhh....

Indeed. Anything with big cylinders in strange arrangements is good for vibration. My 90 degree 1000cc V twin will happily start walking it's way along the pavement if left running on its sidestand!

1
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Buth with a two-stroke[sic]

Sure, more bangs, but so much shorter lived!

You wouldn't want your big end giving way at just the wrong moment would you!

1
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Ummm...

Well I've clicked right on over to the comments, but only to say that a 125cc bike could never be described as a "roaring, thrusting between-the-legs monster". Annoying buzzing mosquito thing would be more accurate.

If the modermatrix would like to give me a call when the weather is slightly more suitable I'll happily warm up 1000cc of V-twin and show her the difference.

2
1

US Navy achieves '100 mile' hypersonic railgun test shot

Steve Evans
Silver badge
WTF?

Question...

If this thing is accelerated by electromagnetism, where does all that smoke some from? It doesn't look much different from a standard chemically propelled shot in that respect.

0
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Interference

That's the least of their worries, have they not seen the Philadelphia Experiment?!

1
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: buckshot

Not really... The problem is the smaller the "shot" the less mass each piece has whilst increasing the surface area and air resistance of the load. This means it will slow down pretty quickly compared to a single shell with the same mass of all the combined bits of shot.

I'd much rather have someone shoot at me with a shotgun at 100 yards than a .22 rifle. The shotgun may have a larger charge, and cover a larger area making me easier to hit, but by the time those little bits of shot reach me (if they haven't just dropped to the floor), they'll be lucky to make it through my coat, let alone my skin. Whereas the .22 slug would really hurt!

1
0

Apple iPhone 4 vs... the rest

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Desire

Re the Nokia comments, I really couldn't agree more. They weren't beaten, they threw the game.

I made the mistake of moving from my reliable N95 to the N97, and after over 10 years of loyal Nokia ownership I feel about as valued as a Catholic priest in a children's home. Customer service just isn't in their dictionary. They fail to admit faults even when they have dozens of threads in their forums screaming "The camera lens cover scratches the camera", "The GPS won't lock" etc etc. The give away free turn by turn navigation, which is nice, but useless for anything other than walking as it's always 30 seconds behind where you are! Try navigating motorway exits and residential turnings with that kind of lag and you'll quickly get very annoyed at the voice saying "recalculating route".

The N8 may be a great phone, but I'm sorry I have no confidence in Nokia's after-market service (I suspect it's single, empty, cubical in Finland), so I'll be off looking at a possible HTC devil I don't know in preference to the one I do.

1
1

Apple chap knocks up ancient Lego computer

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: And within a few hundred years

Actually, I believe it already had. The original machine tracked the movement of the heavenly bodies through the sky, but modelled with the Earth as the centre, meaning that planets would stop part way across the sky and then turn round and head off the other direction! IIRC Mars' path is particularly impressive.

To my mind this is even more impressive than the astrologically accurate Lego version!

0
0

WikiLeaks' Assange to be indicted for spying 'soon'

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Now we know why he was remanded

Do you mean you didn't immediately think this the second your heard the Judge had remanded him?!

Looks like USA are shedding rights faster than a the worlds most inept gang of right handed Arab pick-pockets.

11
1

Judge puts Assange behind bars ahead of extradition hearing

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Ummm...

"Bail was refused on grounds that Assange has access to finance, the case is serious and he could fail to surrender"

Those would be the finances they have frozen in Switzerland, and the not surrendering like he did this morning as arranged?

Looks like it's who you know which is important, not what you know!

Good luck Julian, I don't fancy your chances, I bet there are a few phone calls going on from the US embassy right now. Swedish extradition on dubious charges might be least of your worries.

15
0

Blighty's kids nosedive down global reading, maths rankings

Steve Evans
Silver badge

I'm not surprised...

I've just received a "WTF" mobile phone shot from a friend of mine who's discovered a 16 core windows DELL box running in the local primary school.

I was initially impressed that they were obviously offer 7 year olds courses in nuclear physics, or at least doing some impressive real time ray trace rendering, but it appears the box is purely a file and print server. The CPU usage graphs are a uniformed flat line (yes, at the bottom).

No wonder they don't have any money left for those old fashioned things like teachers!

6
0

Mass mind control artist condemns El Reg to obscurity

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Who?

I've never heard of Limbaugh, I can only assume he's an obscure fat headed moron.

If he's the highest rated radio show, and Fox the highest rated TV, I'm starting to get very very scared... The fruit-loop from Alaska might actually get near something sharp and dangerous!

4
2

Intel reveals 'the billion dollar lost laptop problem'

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Yet again?

There are already plenty of solutions to data security on lost laptops. Truecrypt for example.

Plus are already plenty of laptops with built in hardware level encryption.

Unfortunately until they are used and enabled by default they won't help.

Even when they are, you just know the idiots in the public service will be walking about with unencrypted data either on a memory stick or a CD/DVD which will spend their entire life in the laptop bag until the day they are left in the back of the taxi.

1
0

Russia wins World Cup bid in parrot-sickening travesty

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Excellent news

"Why can't this happen every year?"

Why can't this happen every *day*!

Just ship them all off to somewhere with lots of football pitches and let them watch and play 24/7.

The rest of us can then get on with being civilised.

1
0

Sarah Palin calls for US to stand by North Korea

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Please...

Nobody let her near anything sharp (or a big red button), she's priceless as entertainment, but please, don't ever put her anywhere she can hurt herself or anyone else...

Maybe something like "The Truman Show" would be perfect for her.

2
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: @anon coward

And it's owned by its shareholders, many of which are from... A Merry Car!

0
0

Pole positions: Base station spotters scrap for prize

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Or

Actually, it gets worse... I actually know the "Too tall photographer", I'd better delete his number from my phone first! If they find that they're going to throw away the key!

0
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

IIRC

There is a particularly unconvincing tree by the M25, round the bottom bit near the services.

There's also something very odd between J29 and J30. It looks like a Roman column with branches tied to it. I'm not joking, it's not a badly modelled tree (unless the artist has never seen a tree) it really is a Romanesque column standing in a field. I'll try to get a photo of it (without being arrested for stopping on the hard shoulder).

0
0

Xbox modder can't claim fair use, says judge

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Rewrite needed....

You guys need to rewrite some lyrics... The words "Land of the free" have been reported for being misleading and misrepresenting the country.

2
1

Acer replaces laptop keyboard with multi-touch LCD

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Title

Why? A sheet of glass is far easier to seal against a plastic case than 100 odd moving buttons.

Bar the ports, and the required ventilation for the CPU and chipset, this thing could be completely fluid sealed.

0
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Oooh...

Whilst I appreciate the other comments, and expect it to be a nightmare to type on, I do see a use for it... For making animations and photo retouching.

0
0

Lawsuit says Facebook plunders user names, photos

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Pah!

Anyone that uses friend finder, and trusts Facebook with their messenger username and password, really does deserve everything they get (or lose!). They already know too much!

1
0

Speak geek: The world of made-up language

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Esperanto's success

It's still a seriously rare language, and to make matters worse, you can't go anywhere specific (bar an Esperanto conference) to use it face to face! Estimated speakers 2 million... Which puts it about level with Macedonian. Except you can't just hop on a plane to Esperanta to experience the culture!

3
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Creoles are far more interesting

I agree, sometimes the root of the words are still understood, which makes for a fascinating history lesson.

Take various words for animals/meat in English for example. When it's a smelly farm animal, the word is the original old English/Saxon word. Cow, Pig, Sheep. When it's cooked and on the feast table of the Norman masters it becomes Beef, Pork, Mutton. Still recognisable as the French words today (although I'm sure they'd look at you blankly purely because of pronunciation).

Attempts to get people to learn a universal language such as Esperanto are always going to be an uphill battle. First you have no native speakers, so you can't go for a total immersion course in the country. Then you have to convince people it is required. If the person happens to speak English you could be in with a problem as no matter where you go you can always find someone who can translate English into the local tongue. Add that to the fact that they kept genders for inanimate objects in Esperanto and most English speakers are going to look at you like you're mad!

If you want odd languages you don't need to learn Klingon, there's a world or real ones out there, complete with countries full of people that can speak it back to you... Try Hungarian!

0
0

Ten... budget Android smartphones

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Resistive vd capacitive

No problems with my resistive, it's over 18 months old, and has even been run over by a landrover!

The LCD needed replacing, but the resistive screen is still original.

Yes, I regularly use an iPhone in anger. They're okay, but needing big text for big fingers seems a bit self defeating to me.

I like having lots of text on my screen, which means lots of small text and links. With resistive I can use them, I can read them, and I don't have to continually scroll.

As for people hating resistive, it doesn't seem to have harmed the Nintendo DS.

I have a stylus with the my DS, and I believe there was one with the phone. I never use them.

2
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Resistive vd capacitive

I really don't understand the continual bashing of resistive screens (beyond the fact that resistive is not the Apple way).

I use both, and I far prefer the resistive.

So far the only con I have found to resistive is it can't do multitouch, fair enough, as the user interface isn't designed to take advantage of such a feature, it's not an issue.

The pros are huge. I can use it wearing gloves. If you have finger nails then you can still use it without having to angle your fingers in a way would would be a bit odd when holding the phone.

When you're not wearing gloves, the benefits starts to really appear - accuracy.

You can click on a 2mm high text link on a web page, amongst a sea of other text links, and get it 99% of the time, because you are using a narrow tapping thing like your finger nail.

Plus you can see what you are tapping right up to the point you hit it, because said fingernail is fine and narrow. Not got fingernails, well pick up anything you like from your desk. Biro lid, matchstick, car keys, anything you like, it'll work (taadaa!).

Take a capacitive one, requiring the contact of a squashy finger tip, and you'll be hard pushed to hit anything smaller than the size of a bus with any accuracy. Is it any wonder that the way to navigate "back" is such an easy gesture?

The iPhone4 might have a seriously impressive number of pixels per inch, but you can't use them to resize a webpage to tiny proportions if it has a lot of links close together, the most you can do with it is enjoy some nice font anti-aliasing.

3
0

NY youth makes $130k selling real(-ish) white iPhone 4s

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: $35.99

Thank you Sir!

I honestly couldn't believe the number of thumbs down I received for suggesting that $279 was a non competitive price!

Personally I was thinking if I was a fanboy, I could go and get one fabricated from scratch by a local plastics moulding firm as a one off for less!

Hell I could get a gold plated one done for that!

0
1
Steve Evans
Silver badge

He might be fluent in Chinese...

...but his English is suspect...

"We offer competitively priced parts needed to convert your current black iPhone 4 to a White iPhone 4"

$279 is competitive?!

1
4

How to make boots on Mars affordable - One way trips

Steve Evans
Silver badge
Joke

"colonists may be preferred who are beyond their reproductive age".

So as men are technically capable for their entire life, surely this would mean the crew would comprise purely of older ladies.

They're never going to fit all their shoes into the capsule!

5
0

Chicago officer beats off dildo-wielding bill-skipper

Steve Evans
Silver badge

And....

Where pray tell is the required Monty Python self defence class quote?

Although seriously she's lucky she wasn't tazzed. Guess she didn't walk on the cracks in the pavement or look like a photographer.

0
0

Facebook set to unveil 'Gmail killer'

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Yeah, right...

I think they already know too much, I think I'll stick with separate accounts thanks.

Plus of course hotmail/gmail et al don't go fiddling with their sites every couple of days and break things, The example the notifications list hasn't worked on facebook mobile for at least they last few days.

1
0

No wonder CompSci grads are unemployed

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: C++ blows - Agreed!

As a young teenager in the 80s I started playing first with a commodore PET at school and then my own BBC Micro. So I picked up BASIC. My 'O' level was written in 6502 machine code. My 'A' level was written in BASIC. They had taught us Pascal, which was an option, but I was pissed at them for not letting me use machine code for the 'A' level.

I would give Pascal another chance a few years later.

Even doing the 'A' level I started to become disillusioned with what we were being taught, so when I saw the degree syllabus I decided I'd had enough of this education rubbish. I still remember the computer science teacher calling me out of a geography lesson to help him set things up when I was 13!

From there the big old world of work started. COBOL, PCs, 8086 machine code, DOS TSRs, windoze, bit of OS2, VB, Delphi, C etc. Intarweb and TCP/IP.

Delphi (Pascal++) is probably my favourite for writing windows apps. It's just so quick. How C became some dominant when it was designed to make thing unreadable after you turn away for 5 minutes is beyond me.

I never ceased to be amazed at the number of grads I worked with who just had no fundamental knowledge of computers. Sure I could forgive them for not having built a computer from spare bits aged 15, not everyone was a geeky as me, but to looked astonished when I open a command prompt and type a few magical incantations is unforgivable.

Typical example - "I have a load of music mp3s, mpeg movies and word docs all together in a directory, how can I move just the tunes and movies?"

Errr, move *.m* <destination>

Reclaim all the drive space windows has cluttered up with temporary files?

del "%temp%\*.*" /s /f /q

Simples.

These days I program windows apps and microcontrollers. It's interesting juggling between Delphi windows apps and C/ASM on the MCU, ad yes, fixing other people's C code.

There is always a sigh and relaxed smile on my face when I return to Delphi and have native string handling once again! Not to mention the inherent security aspect of having a language which knows how to handle strings, and isn't just forcing you to throw random characters about in memory!

2
1

BA slams stupid security checks

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Why can't we just have....

Or red plane and Green plane. I think the red plane would have to be flown by remote control, probably from the green one, who'd want to pilot that one?! It could work you know... Make everyone eat a ham sandwich. Those that refuse go into the red plane.

Sure it will mean the Muslims and Jews are on the same plane, but hopefully the hippy vegetarians will manage to keep it calm with a sing along.

5
2
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: 3. Incident with underpants bomb - no action

Pity, I think any terrorist who wants to set fire to their own genitalia, and cook their DNA from the gene pool should be allowed to do it.

3
0
Steve Evans
Silver badge

Hallowed?

They wouldn't let me out of the UK with a 125g pot of Marmite.

I tried to explain the difference between a 100ml measure of liquid volume and 125g measure of mass, but had to admit defeat in the face of overwhelming stupidity.

5
0

UK border police seize £500k from Nigerians' hand luggage

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Hmmmm

"...seized the cash under the Proceeds of Crime Act until the men can prove it comes from a legitimate source."

So guilty until proven innocent? I'm sure UK govt tried this kind of thing before, and got a slap from the EU lawyers.

5
0

Cinema iPhone pirate escapes jail in test case appeal

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Jeeez

He should be locked up for crimes against video quality (not just his choice of movie, but his chosen recording device) and for polluting the bittorrents with this crap!

0
0

iPhone, BlackBerry, Droid: purveyors of pestilence

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Oh let's stick touch screen on a report...

Of course sharing bugs and germs wouldn't happen if you shared a non touch screen phone with someone else, or a landline handset or a book.

2
0

OOo's put the willies up Microsoft

Steve Evans
Silver badge
Gates Horns

Interoperability?

Curiously, it's interoperability which has caused me to install OpenOffice on the most machines... machines which up until now were happily working with Office2003... Why? Well because people kept emailing docs in M$'s latest and greatest format, and not wishing spend $$$ upgrading to yet another version of office I searched round for something which could read docx.

I now notice M$ seem to be releasing far more format converters so 2003 can now read the newer formats... Too late M$!

1
0

Ryanair wins ihateryanair.co.uk because of £322 ad revenue

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Is that all?

£322 from affiliate links to services including travel insurance that appeared on the site... He should take a leaf out of Ryan Air's books. I've never seen them offer a special or bundle during ticket booking that I couldn't get at least 25% cheaper with 3 clicks and going direct to the company concerned.

0
0

Jobsian fondle-slab in SEXY FILTHGRAM CRACKDOWN

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Jeeez

The US patent office will allow a patent on anything won't they!

A patent is only supposed to be granted on a new innovation which isn't blatantly obvious.

Content word filtering is hardly new. There may even be prior art on this exact use. I'm sure somewhere like a right wing Arab state or China have been doing this for years.

0
0

Windows Phone 7 leaves operators on the hook

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Good

Agreed.

I have never seen an addition installed by a mobile carrier that was worth the memory space it took.

Plus of course that "custom" firmware then delays (and often prevents) firmware updates from mobile manufacturers which invariably fix bugs and add new useful features.

The sooner the mobile operators settle for being a dumb pipe, the better!

1
0

Flying gyrocopter jump-jeep gets $3m from DARPA

Steve Evans
Silver badge

So...

Whereas the UK are now withdrawing the lightly armoured Landrovers, and replacing them with things which resemble the taxis from the Judge Dread movie (incidentally built on a Landrover for the film), the US are going to use vehicles which are light enough to fly... Best they give them some serious flying range (like one of those helicopter things for example) or the first time they touch down an IED is going to reduce them to shrapnel.

0
0

Car wrecks rise after texting bans imposed

Steve Evans
Silver badge

My thought exactly...

When not explicitly illegal, you could have held the mobile on the steering wheel, in plain sight, and also had some awareness of what is going on outside the vehicle.

Now it's illegal, the mobile will be sitting on the drivers lap, stealth mode.

2
0

Toshiba Satellite A660 16in laptop

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Bl**dy widescreen

Hate it on a laptop... Just makes the things twice the size, and you still lose the far more useful vertical resolution.

16:10 and 16:9 are only really useful for TVs, and even then they are still a compromise when it comes to films which are wider still than 16:9, so you still end up with a letterbox!

I'm happily typing this on my aged ThinkPad R52 with its 15" 1400x1050 4:3 screen and suspect I'll still be using this in 5 years time... By which point it will have probably had a second hard drive transplant and be equipped with SSD.

0
0

Nutter repairmen scale 1,768ft TV mast

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: Parachute

Too right, only way you'd get me up that thing!

It'd be a quick (fun) way down, and way safer than dangling about with no safety, or a safety hooked over the end of a thin foot rung!

Actually, I lied. That still wouldn't get me up there. You would also required a gun about 6 inches from my head - so you're coming up with me too!.

1
0

Apple in 873-page legal claim to word 'Pod'

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Right...

Right, we need to go back after them, the word "Job" being well known English slang for a turd. "Jobs" is obviously the plural form of this noun.

0
0

Paris brushes off Japanese ejection over coke bust

Steve Evans
Silver badge
Paris Hilton

Advisor...

You have to question who advises Paris on her trips (let's face it she hardly likely to be organising things herself), given Japan's stance on such matters it really was an ill-advised trip. Even her own country, the US of A takes a dim view of visitors with a drug conviction (curiously introduced during the "reign" of a president who confessed to smoking weed himself - although not inhaling).

Oh hang on (interfaces hand with forehead), of course they knew this... This is all about column inches isn't it (not the kind of inches Paris prefers I'm sure).

4
0

Crash grounds RAF Eurofighters - for Battle of Britain Day!

Steve Evans
Silver badge

Re: So ...

That might not be as daft as it sounds... I wonder how well heat seeking missiles lock onto the not so hot exhaust of an internal combustion engine as opposed to the huge wash of hot gasses that come out of the back of a jet?

1
0

Thieves jam key-fob lock signals in mystery car thefts

Steve Evans
Silver badge

There are some dodgy gadgets about...

My brother recently disturbed two guys trying to steal his motorbike from outside his house.

They ran off.

When he came to move the bike to safety he found his alarm completely disabled. There was no sign of physical tampering. His alarm automatically arms after the bike has been turned off for 30 seconds and he has never experienced any problem with it until that night.

Pressing his keyfob the first time did nothing. The second time he pressed it the bike did its normal "disarm" beep, and has continued to function normally ever since.

Very suspicious.

0
0