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* Posts by Steve Evans

2361 posts • joined 17 Apr 2007

Windows 8: Thrown into a multi-tasking mosh pit

Steve Evans
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Yuck...

I've had a few minutes of play with 8 & Metro, and it's horrible.

The thought that I have been left with is that M$ seem to be committed to some crazy idea of a "unified user experience" across all devices, something which even Apple realise is a stupid thing to do.

Maybe M$ will use this as some anti iStuff advertising ammo, "You use our desktop like you use our tablet, or our mobile"...

The problem is a scratch and sniff touch interface is designed for big fat fingers prodding on a small screen. A desktop machine with a huge monitor and several hundred DPI optical mouse doesn't need 200x200 pixel squares to click, you can easily hit a 16x16, and use the rest of the screen real-estate for more information and other stuff.

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Apple resellers left to pick bones of dwindling iPad stocks

Steve Evans
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Re: One born every minute

Or.

"Apple continue to be completely incompetent when it comes to introducing a new model."

Or (more accurately)

"Gutter press continue to be completely incompetent as Apple once again plays them like a virtuoso."

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Solar storm arrives, nobody notices

Steve Evans
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SHHHHHHH!

We've successfully blamed three issue on solar flare activity today, don't ruin it!

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STUNNING NEW APPLE DEVICES that will follow the iPad 3 HD!

Steve Evans
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Re: no touch

Indeed. The mystical device is not a keyboard.

It is a board of keys.

Sorry, board of ikeys.

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FSF fandroids fight to 'free' Android from Google's forepaws

Steve Evans
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Re: Replicant

If I've read the bits of news correctly, this is what the Cyanogenmod team are trying to do with V9.

Why FSF feels the need to start yet another branch is beyond me, why can't they just help the CM team?

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Eric Schmidt flicks INTERSTELLAR TOWEL at top tech fair

Steve Evans
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Re: Screw the technology

I'm sorry Sir, we're out of stock at the moment.

I can however offer you a smack round the head with this slice of lemon...

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Steve Evans
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Still waiting...

I'm still waiting for a fish I can stick in my ear.

Until this happens I will remain unable to communicate with my Geordie friend after he has drunk 4 beers.

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Ford: kick your car to open the boot

Steve Evans
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Well if the rumours were correct, they forgot that with the original airbag systems... The idea was that an impact would trigger the airbag and unlock the doors.

Unfortunately it also worked when the car was parked and locked. So all a thief had to do was whack the front bumper with a 4x2 to trigger the airbag system and the doors would open.

As I said, it's just a rumour I heard, so it's probably bull. Although I seen enough evidence of stupidity from manufacturers in my time to be left 50/50 on this one!

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Steve Evans
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So...

So I've got my arms full of heavy shopping, and you want me to stand on one leg and swing my free foot about, not get smacked in the chin by the opening boot lid, all whilst retaining a grip on the shopping?

What is this, some kind of US Highway Patrol drink drive test?

How about something useful like speech recognition? I'd love to be able to open the boot with a stream of verbal obscenities.

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UK.gov holds summit to stop satnav-driven smash-ups

Steve Evans
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...

"However, the main reasons the satnavs cause problems is because it can take months for map updates from local councils to make their way onto the gadgets."

And the rest... What about those who bought the satnav, and then don't sign up (with ££) for a subscription which provides updates?

Anyone that follows a satnav into a river, over a cliff, or down a footpath should be hit with an "Undue care and attention" conviction. A few of those and it's bye bye licence, so they'll either learn to look where they a bl**dy well going, or be removed from our roads. The latter would seem to be for the common good.

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BT, TalkTalk lose final appeal against Digital Economy Act

Steve Evans
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Big Brother

I for one do not welcome our big brother overlords.

So, have us peasants got any form of appeal against a warning, or are UK pensioners doomed to receive three warnings for downloading west coast gangstar rap before being banished from the intarweb?

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Hello? You'll never guess where I am ... I'm under a ferry

Steve Evans
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Re: accidental roaming

Note to everyone.

Settings, network selection: Manual!

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Steve Evans
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Re: Je suis dans la train!

Big difference that will make, nobody ever polices such policies.

I remember sitting in the quiet carriage of a C2C train from Fenchurch Street. There was a guy (I have more colourful names I could use, but have controlled myself) who spent the entirety of my journey listening to some god-awful rap music played out through the high fidelity speakers (5Khz-8Khz +-1db) of his mobile.

Honestly, how can anyone think that sounds good or impressive, or was he just wanting to get into an argument?

At least if he had a ghetto blaster I would have had something I could have hit him with!

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Steve Evans
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Mobile underground

I was quite surprised to discover the Metro in Budapest had coverage. I say surprised because my phone started ringing in the middle of a tunnel.

Odd thing was I'd been in the city for three days, and in that entire time I hadn't heard a single phone ring, or anyone talking loudly.

Maybe they're just more polite than the people on the London Underground.

So for my loudly ringing phone, I humbly apologise.

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SHOCK: RIM PlayBook outsells Apple iPad

Steve Evans
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Re: Don't take the sales figures too seriously........

Yes indeed!

In fact looking at the USA for any kind of mobile phone stats is grossly misleading. They'd hardly heard of Nokia before it got taken over by Elop and assimilated into the MS collective.

Have they even sorted out the cross network SMS interconnects yet? Last time I tried to text a friend in FL it never arrived, yet I can text friends in every country in Europe, Australia and Russia without any problems what so ever - well, unless they have a blackberry, then it's always better to email. In fact bad SMS interconnects *are* the reason the blackberry became so dominant. Whilst the rest of the world was happily using SMS to send short messages, the only way you could do this reliably in the US was to send an email.

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Samsung worker confirms April launch for Galaxy S III

Steve Evans
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Re: What's starting to worry me...

Indeed. A friend of mine bought a Mac Book Pro thingy, it actually turned out to be the cheapest way to get the hardware spec he wanted. How times have changed eh?!

He then installed Win 7 on it.

I've dared him to take it to the genius bar if it develops a problem.

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Steve Evans
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But...

Will the damn thing have a notification light?

I honestly can't believe the S2 doesn't have one. I stood there gob-smacked when shown it by a work mate. Seriously, you have to turn the damn screen on every time you have walked away from your desk, just to see if you've missed anything.

Daftest thing I've ever seen.

Glad there are 101 other 'droids with lights for me to chose from.

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Weeing Frenchman sues Google over Street View photo

Steve Evans
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Re: Legal or not

Sounds like standard student digs to me!

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Steve Evans
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Re: Pics...

Is that *the* picture?

He looks like he's just standing there. Couldn't tell he was Oui'ing at all.

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Archos touts Android tablets for toddlers

Steve Evans
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Re: In my limited experience*,

I would think the most important feature for kiddy friendly would be being water/drink proof.

That speaker grill on the end looks rather permeable to me.

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MWC: Inscrutable slogans, Google toys and the invisible Apple

Steve Evans
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Accelerating mobile revenuization

Someone needs to be shot for crimes again the English language... Assuming that is English - hard to be sure!

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Feds unlock suspect's encrypted drive, avoid Constitution meltdown

Steve Evans
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No such luck in the UK

Failure to provide a password to the police when requested is a criminal offence. 2 years.

It hasn't been greatly tested in court yet, and I don't remember ever hearing "I've forgotten it" being tested.

Slightly alarming as I'm sure we all have several files which we have no key too, usually parts of software installs which will look like total gibberish to the cops and could easily invite a "what's the password?" when it might not even be an encrypted file, just a binary with an odd file extension.

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Tomorrow's smartphone tech today

Steve Evans
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Unhappy

:-(

No sign of any new battery technology to power all the new shiny bits then?

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ISP Be admits crippling iPlayer demand burst its pipes

Steve Evans
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Wow!

ISP in over selling of back-end infrastructure shocker!

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Fat margins squeeze Apple against Android

Steve Evans
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I don't know which blinkered view of sales figures you are looking at (although from your phrasing I guess it's US only figures), but you might like to look at these.

http://www.gartner.com/it/page.jsp?id=1848514

Sorry they are Q3 2011, but I think they prove the point.

In summary:

Worldwide smartphone sales to end users Q3 2011

Android 52.5%

Symbian 16.9%

iOS 15.0%

RIM 11%

So getting ATF to kick out the Blackberry in their favour isn't really the fight they need to be fighting if they intend on domination.

Sure, Apple aren't hurting as long as people continue to feed their huge profit margins, but unless they are willing to remain a niche product, they will have to do something. Yes, I know, just like the Mac, but I know plenty of ex Mac users who have deserted to PC, usually because of software availability.

You only have to look at what happened to Nokia to see how quickly things can change in the mobile world.

As far as I'm concerned I'd rather have to many choices than none at all, and long may that continue.

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Powerful, wallet-sized Raspberry Pi computer sells out in SECONDS

Steve Evans
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Chortle...

Just went to have a look at uk.farnell.com. Midnight 1st march.

Their front page throws up a box saying "Are you looking for the Raspberry Pi? Click here". I suspect their search engine was getting rather bogged down and they had to divert the load away from it. First time I've ever seen that on the front page of Farnell.

Well done to the Raspberry team, hope you enjoyed the beer.

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GPS glitch leads perp-pursuing cops to wrong house

Steve Evans
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Actually...

There isn't actually any proof there was a GPS problem. The house was empty, so someone could have been there earlier, and the cops just took too long to turn up, carry out a health and safety study of the splinter risk, check everyone had the correct training to use the door ram, and then finally make entry.

By this time the perp was probably in Lincolnshire.

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Nepal asks for a leg-up to nail Everest's height

Steve Evans
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Re: Following his TomTom gig, a celebrity opportunity

This being Brian, I doubt you'd even need them to be nearby peaks!

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Orange to impose overseas data cap to beat bill shock

Steve Evans
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Re: Something smells fishy.

What aren't they telling us?

You mean beyond the fact that all the mobile companies are still charging us way over the odds for roamed data and sms? If you're bored one day you want to work out the price per megabyte of a text message (i.e. less data than you could fit on the 3.5" floppy). Just make sure you're sitting down first.

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41-megapixel MONSTER mobe shutters Nokia knockers

Steve Evans
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Re: Aren't we past this?

I imagine low light performance will be dire, then again, have you seen some of the posts your friends put up on facebook from a night out clubbing? Blurred and shaky appear to be this season's black.

Anyway, back to the subject... The clever solution when you're playing about with low light and photosites a fraction of the size of a human hair is to combine them, effectively dropping the resolution and then measuring the captured photons across a 3x3 block. Sure, your 41 megapixel silly camera resolution suddenly drops to 4.5mp, but you will at least have a hope of actually seeing something before you have to crank up the amplification so hard that you detect radio Luxembourg.

Although given the use of the horribly sales-pitch phrase "pixel over-sampling technology" I wouldn't be shocked to find out that the sensor doesn't have anything like 41 megapixels and is purely a clever image processor hooked onto the back of a far more humble resolution sensor.

More interestingly (and completely unmentioned in the article) is the flash, it's hard to tell from the picture, and I could be getting my hopes up here, but is that a *real* xenon flash tube there?

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iPad owners 'considerably richer than yow'

Steve Evans
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Re: Confirming the demographic

I think you are under estimating Apple's marketing.

There is a whole other demographic which partake in the distortion field.

MCTS - More credit than sense.

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Apple files patent for 'polished meteorite' keyboard

Steve Evans
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"Scissor-switch keys provide fine feedback, but are so 20th-century chubby"

Then long levers must be 19th century, if not 18th.

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Feds apply for DNSChanger safety net extension

Steve Evans
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So...

Turning off the replacement DNS servers will prevent the infected (and unprotected) machines from resolving any URLs... Therefore protecting them from hurting themselves further, or sending more spam.

Sounds like a win win for the rest of the intarweb. Pull the plug!

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GPS jamming rife, could PARALYSE Blighty, say usual suspects

Steve Evans
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@RayG

We did indeed, and IIRC the outcome was that it was trivially easy to block (simple RF interference would do it), but more complicated to spoof.

60 block/spoofs in 6 months isn't much. That could almost be due to accidental interference, or depending on the locations of these listeners, be down to the spooks and their anti tracking measures.

If the 6 months happened to included a visit from Mr Obama, I'd put money on the latter.

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For those thinking Private Cloud

Steve Evans
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Headmaster

See me after school...

"They’re remit is ‘be helpful’ "

*shudder*

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Dell Latitude E6220 12.5in Core i7 notebook

Steve Evans
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"when it comes to rolling up your sleeves and updating various websites, using content management systems and working on long documents, you need a proper keyboard"

And more than a 768 pixel high screen!

Sounds like a bit of a premium netbook to me. You could treat yourself to a Sony SE series lappy with a full HD screen and an i7 for less £££...

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Man surfs slopes at night in LED suit

Steve Evans
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He's not the stig...

... but he is the Stig's radioactive cousin!

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Satnav blunders blamed for £200m damages

Steve Evans
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Re: Its a Tool FFS

Exactly my thoughts Captain.

Before I set off I make sure I at least have a rough idea where I'm going, and what direction it is in.

This ancient technique came in handy on Malta recently, no sat nav, and they don't believe in signs before roundabouts telling you where each exit goes. If you are lucky they will have each exit labelled on the roundabout itself, but don't count on it. Luckily 'tis a small island, and keeping an eye on the sun keeps you going in roughly the right compass direction... I guess the satnav zombie would be all over the road purely so they can keep the sun in sight if they tried this technique!

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Bung a tenner to a mate's mobile number with new Barclays app

Steve Evans
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Re: Tried it on my phone

Confirmed...

I didn't have any interest in this gimmick until you said this, but now I try it I see the same problem.

Lame.

I might have a play about later and see if I can stop it detecting the root.

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Pope's PR says Vatican in grip of WikiLeaks-style scandal

Steve Evans
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It also has more than a passing resemblance to Terry Pratchett's Unseen University where promotion is via "Dead man's shoes".

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China clamps down on foreign telly on its channels

Steve Evans
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Where? WHERE? Tell me!

I wanna emigrate!

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Space: 1999 returning to TV?

Steve Evans
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I thought one of the other critical parts of a planet classification was the ability to retain an atmosphere?

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Steve Evans
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a-hem...

"It told the story of boffins working on Moonbase Alpha who were propelled into fantastic adventures beyond imagination after a massive nuclear explosion on the moon on 13 September 1999 sent our little satellite planet into deep space."

Our little satellite planet? No. The Moon orbits planet Earth, so it is a moon. Planets orbit the sun. Moons orbit planets. Once it was blown out of earth orbit and shot out across space it still wasn't orbiting the sun, so I guess it became a sodding great asteroid.

Still not a planet.

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Germany stalls over ACTA treaty ratification

Steve Evans
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Bit of a difference between UKIP and the BNP. (Can't comment on the SNP, although they do look amusing on the TV). UKIP are for the UK's interests and against the EU bureaucratic steam roller.

Given the way national governments go round implementing pretty much anything which comes out of Brussels you would be forgiven for wondering why we both to pay for all their second homes and duck houses.

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Steve Evans
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Actually...

I think that was the original posters point, most countries have a "no using the mobile phone whilst driving" law, despite them all having a "driving without undue care and attention" catch-all law on the statute books already which allows the cops to prosecute anyone for anything which they think is dangerous from eating a sandwich to receiving oral pleasure.

Unfortunately they don't seem to ever apply it to parents with screaming kids on the back seat, possibly the most distracted and dangerous drivers I see.

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Iran draws veil over secure internet access

Steve Evans
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My thoughts exactly... We can't read it, so it must be bad.

Someone need to throw a big roll of cat5 over the border into a neighbouring stable country... Oh, yes, sorry, I see the problem now.

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Revealed: Apple's plea for fairness in mobile patent war

Steve Evans
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Gimp

Wow!

29 up and 0 down.

Not a single down vote to a post which takes a dig at Apple and the US patent office?

Don't tell me the fanboys have actually started to see the light!

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IT guy answers daughter's Facebook rant by shooting her laptop

Steve Evans
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Hmmm...

Come America, solving every problem with a gun? It's getting boring now, be a bit more inventive.

Personally I like thermite. Unfortunately that's getting a little popular too.

How about covering it in blood and going shark fishing?

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