* Posts by Lager And Crisps

70 posts • joined 12 Jun 2008

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Microsoft gears up for Windows 8

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...let the party commence!!!

I just love the reaction of all those obedient Wintards.

Ballmer says "Jump", the Wintards eagerly reply "How high, master?"

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Canonical punts Ubuntu Jaunty Jackalope

Lager And Crisps
Gates Halo

...first post, LOL!!!

Microsofties are patrolling all the tech sites I see. Rooting tooting for the off, the Windows 7 release date are we? They nearly always go by the name of "Anonymous Coward", could be coincidence I guess.

Either that or Bill Gates has too much time on his hands these days.

Come back Bill, all is forgotten...

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Businesses will postpone Windows 7 rollouts

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...this will be "The One" for sure!!

Microsoft has only itself to blame over Vista. Yes I have tried it and yes it is that bad, before you ask.

Something that still puzzles be is this artificial euphoria surrounding Windows 7. Yes I have tried it and yes it is an improvement, before you ask again.

One item worth noting for future reference, the later betas of Vista were never quite as bad as the final RTM release. Yes I...you get the picture.

It's as if Microsoft, in their infinite wisdom, decided to add bloat (it's a feature) at the last possible moment to dumbfound their customers and business partners alike. Will history repeat itself is the question nobody wants to ask.

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Microsoft ordered to pay $388m patent infringement damages

Lager And Crisps
Flame

...(yes that's the sound of me laughing)!!

Software patents should be unilaterally terminated with extreme prejudice, no matter where they are. Having said that...

Payback is a bitch aint it Microsoft?

Now what about those commentators that went out of their way to justify Microsoft's position in the Tom Tom case. Will any step up to explain how this is any different?

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Microsoft draws fire for taxpayer handout

Lager And Crisps
Coat

...and as if by magic?

Now I know that Microsoft watches the world's tech press. I also know they pay many people to respond to articles such as this. Many of those people have responded here, and to me personally.

So I will ask them outright "Do you think this is justified given the status of the world's economy with the recession and all, you may have noticed?"

I can predict many of the following comments, freetard, tin-foil hat, communist, enemy of humanity (ok that last one was just made up) but I think you get my point.

If IBM are a recipient of this handout, the Microsofties would smell blood and would want to know why (valid point, IBM and offshoring?). If Microsoft, as it seems here, are the beneficiary of a government handout (Gates probably has more money in his sock draw) then questions need to be asked, but they won't be.

If you depend on Microsoft in any way (most of the computer and information technology business), you will disagree with everything said above. This is to be expected.

Is that my coat?

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Microsoft and TomTom settle 'Linux' kerfuffle

Lager And Crisps
Happy

...is that you Bill?

@Anonymous Hero

LOL!!!

I'm surprised you can use a keyboard let alone operate a computer, your usual way of expressing yourself is probably done with crayons. Run along now theres a good boy, the grown-ups want to talk.

Your comment did cheer me up, even if it was somewhat moronic. ;-)

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Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...who next?

Only Microsoft could get away with what would be considered a criminal act in other countries around the world, only in America.

For me Microsoft are the embodiment of pure evil. It's about time those politicians stopped taking bribes and back handers and uphold the law, they expect the rest of us to.

If they where wiped of the face of the planet by a direct asteroid hit, I wouldn't give a shit.

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The Open Cloud Manifesto in full

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...these are my toys, MINE ,MINE, MINE!!!

Microsoft and the word "open" in the same sentence, I doubt that very much. The Redmond outfit don't want to play nice with anyone. They want to be the only choice, and are willing to spend billions to achieve this goal.

"I was amazed at how comprehensive the Microsoft Azure products was (even with the initial odd SQL Services). Not just a platform, but an architecture blueprint..

The alternative is “under construction”."

Wow, just wow. How much of that Kool-Aid have you consumed? It seems to have the same hallucigenetic qualities many class "A" drugs are renowned for.

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Acer sued for shipping Vista-book with GB of memory

Lager And Crisps
Flame

...yikes!

I didn't even know you could get a Netbook with Vista installed from an OEM, I must live a sheltered life. I propose a three step solution:

1) Acer must be punished for offering such a choice to unsuspecting customers.

2) Microsoft must be punished because Vista is their creation.

3) The two people named in the lawsuit must be punished for ambulance chasing.

Did I miss something?

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Windows 7 RC download page reveals May ship date

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...chesnuts!

@ Luke

I have tried one of the later Windows 7 betas (build 7048) and it choked on a system with 512mb of RAM with a dedicated graphics card (Nvidia). Ironically enough, Vista actually does install and updates all patches and drivers on this machine. It's slooooow, but it does work.

@Dave

You can sigh all you want mate, but some of us have taken Windows 7 for a spin around the block. And we did more than just kick the tyres and check under the hood.

My own opinion is predictable. Microsoft could release an operating system worse than Vista (is this even possible?) and the most hardcore of their user base would cream themselves praising it as the one true version of Windows, superior to anything else available. If memory serves they also said the same of Vista. Six months after the official release of Windows 7 Microsoft will announce the design specifications of it's successor and the cycle shall begin again.

This is how the commercial software industry works, why should Microsoft be any different? Windows 7 is just Vista with bug fixes, security updates, a little optimization and a few cosmetic changes thrown in for good measure. It is not a new operating system designed from scratch.

Chances are any new enhancements or technology that appear with Windows 7 (DirectX 11?) will be backdated to Vista anyway with the next service pack. But some will still go out and purchase Windows 7 and it will take up residence in the draw or shelf next to Vista.

Sometimes you have to take your hat of to Microsoft.

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Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...Windows is dead, long live Windows!

What ever the shipping date of Windows 7, they sure want to bury the Windows-Formerly-Known-As-Vista in a lead lined coffin. They will probably then and give it a funeral at sea, sinking it with as little fanfare as possible.

Meanwhile the marketing division at Microsoft will proclaim "Windows is dead, long live Windows!" I tell you, these guys could sell tarantulas to people that suffer from arachnophobia. The faithful always want to feel that their faith is justified, thus Microsofties will obediently buy Windows 7 as they did it's predecessor . Me, I think I'll pass. But then again I never was a true believer.

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Microsoft: Judge us by our deeds on open source

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...and we did laugh!

Of the 228 patents that Linux violates Ballmer stated "Someday, for all countries that are entering the WTO (World Trade Organisation), somebody will come and look for money owing to the rights for that intellectual property"

Maybe I'm missing something and that whooshing sound over my head is deafening, but does the headline read "Microsoft: judge us by our deeds on open source"?

I think this is one of those double-take moments, I need to collect myself, have a stiff drink then go lie down somewhere. Bye...!

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Bush Obama sides with RIAA in P2P fight

Lager And Crisps

...change you can believe in?

The more things change, the more they stay the same...I'm running out of cliches here.

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Microsoft claims IE8 is 'a leap forward in web standards'

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...is IE a lost cause?

Out of 27 submitters of comments to this article (as of now) only 2 or 3 stuck up for Internet Explorer, and even then they used the word "esoteric" as regards the test IE8 actually failed.

Semantics aside, I view this as progress. Even the "Anonymous Cowards" have fallen silent on the issue of IE. Web standards, or the lack thereof, gave Microsoft an edge. Now it is considered a faux pas to just code a website for IE access only.

I think Firefox did the Internet a favour, even if that was never the intention. It raised awareness about standards and opened the door for other browsers that adhere to these standards. Maybe there is hope after all. Who wants to get locked into a one browser, one operating system and one Internet scenario?

I am waiting to hear from those that think that an Internet Explorer dominated Internet is to the benefit of mankind rather than a single corporation.

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PC buyers fail to prove MS deceived in Vista 'Capable' suit

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...not my fault Sir, honest!

I suspect many apologists will defend Microsoft's position simply because it is Microsoft. They would be all over IBM, Sun, Red Hat etc if they behaved in this manner.

There always will be one rule for Microsoft, and one rule for the rest of the world. And if Microsoft's minions can't see this as fact then justice is truly blind.

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TomTom countersues Microsoft

Lager And Crisps
Unhappy

...cue joke about a plane!

Damn software patents, two wrongs don't make a right.

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Scientology spokesman confirms Xenu story

Lager And Crisps
Coat

...obligatory!

[This comment has been removed for legal reasons at the request of The Church of Scientology.]

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MS security chief becomes DHS cybersecurity boss

Lager And Crisps
Unhappy

...another double take moment I think!

And you thought anything would change once Obama became President.

Big business chooses the President of America, not the populace. The elective process is nothing more than a toothless PR exercise. Pretty similar to Blighty I guess.

Microsoft and security is an oxymoron.

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MS packs yet more tweaks into 'near-ready' Windows 7

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...deja vu, again. Yo Jake!

Cue scene from South Park or Beavis and Butthead:

"Bill Gates invented the computer, single handedly...you know on his own dude, like nobody else was involved...ever."

"Without Gates and his vision, we would be without Windows and it's absolute superiority to anything that exist now, or will ever exist...ever. Dude, are you getting me? Does my haircut look bogus, not that I know what bogus means, it just sounds cool, ya know."

"I keep being prodded and poked to read these cue-cards, all they had to do was to contact my elocution teacher and arrange a photo-shoot. This mobile phone, is it rotary? Does it matter if it's not rotary?"

"Windows 7...sounds...cool...sort of. So 7 is better than 6? What do you mean there was no 6? 6 was Vista...sorry you lost me. "

"It's not fair, it's just not fair. People keep dissing Windows 7. LIKE IT HAS NOT EVEN BEEN RELEASED YET, OFFICIALLY LIKE. Damn, Windows 7 killed Kenny...cool!"

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Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...here we go again!

I have tried Windows 7 build 7048 and was not at all surprised by the results. It does consume less resources than Vista (any incarnation), but still needs far more than XP. Indeed on a machine that Vista installs and finds all the updates and drivers (an old Athlon 1400 with 512mb of ram), it actually performs worse, not really an eye opener in the context of a beta. But since Microsoft deems beta quality software fit for the general public then build 7048 will not be far wide of the mark with regards an RTM release.

The aforementioned system has similar all round capabilities as modern entry level netbooks. I've always wondered why they earmarked Windows 7 Starter ,the one with the three application limit, for this market. I guess we now know, and its probably just as well.

The Redmond posse will explain to the rest of us how we misunderstood Vista, and that Microsoft in their infinite wisdom and generosity have given unto us another chance with Windows 7. We also have the honour of becoming official beta testers to an unfinished product, is there no end to their munificence?

Microsofties the world over will herald Windows 7 as the saviour of mankind in these dark and troubled times. Meanwhile the rest of us shall view this as nothing more than business as usual.

And to those that camp outside your local software emporium on the night before release, enjoy Windows Vista Service Pack 2 Special Edition Remix Directors Cut Bonus Feature Everything Including the Kitchen Sink...Windows 7. Chances are you paid for it twice after all.

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Vista to XP 'downgrade' lawsuit revised

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...yikes!

Lots of people saying they would stand with Microsoft on this issue, no surprise there then. The most courageous of that number do not go by the name of "Anonymous Coward", a revelation in itself.

I would suspect that Microsoft bought of the opposition lawyers and witnesses long before most of this became public knowledge. The outcome will be a resounding victory for Microsoft, and those that support Microsoft will be relieved. And I know what you will say, I am wearing my tin-foil hat.

Tell me, if you sold Anti-Malware software that depended on the Microsoft monopoly, would you want an almost immune OS (Linux,*BSD) becoming the market leader?

Microsoft will buy, buy , buy and then buy some more. Billions pay for justice, Microsoft justice.

Ballmer will spend billions to suppress Linux, billions you understand?

I think at the end of the day Linux will prevail where Microsoft can not purchase the entire political system of a country for it's own ends. But which 3rd and 2nd world nation does not like money?

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Did TomTom test Microsoft's Linux patent lock-down?

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...what agenda?

Microsoft is trying to suffocate Linux, pure and simple. You can go on about the legalities of this, that and the other but this is what it all boils down to.

Linux is superior to Windows, fact. Microsoft knows this, fact. Linux is gaining market traction, fact. Microsoft has spent billions through various methods (buying politicians, ISO etc) suppressing Linux, fact. This business with Tom-Tom is merely the tip of the iceberg, fact.

Microsoft apologists are ten a penny. Most make excuses for their beloved Redmond masters because they have something to lose if Linux takes an even bigger bite out of the Windows apple (LOL!).

Make no mistake, Microsoft can deny all they like that this is about destroying a legitimate competitor. But that is exactly what it is, and no amount of hyperbole can disguise this.

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MS coughs to hokey-cokey IE8 option in Windows 7

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...progress???

The big bad EU is picking on poor innocent Microsoft again, shame on them.

If Microsoft hadn't embedded IE so far into Windows that it became a requirement of the operating system to function, none of this would be necessary. But no, in their infinite wisdom and quest for world domination Microsoft entwined IE and Windows so one was inseparable from the other.

I vaguely remember a passage from the film "Enter The Dragon" where Bruce Lee is asked about his martial arts style. His reply was something along the lines of "the art of fighting, without fighting". Microsoft has mastered the art of complying, without complying.

And to top it all off, if IE is still on the system (it is not physically removed) then it can still be a target for malware creators.

Microsoft, the embodiment of frustration.

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Microsoft courts enterprises with Windows 7

Lager And Crisps
Flame

...feel the wrath of the Chair God!!!

Plenty of Microsoft sycophants, nearly all 'Anonymous Coward'. Are there more than one of you, I meant to ask?

Nice to see plenty of healthy skepticism before the release of Windows 7. Contrary to belief, if you are critical of a Microsoft product after it's re-launch (Vista is 99.99% of the same code as 7) you are not a born again loser.

I'm sure that Microsoft has a stealthy monitoring system watching every man, woman and child on the planet. I say this because if anyone, anywhere and at any time has the audacity to question the quality of a Microsoft product or service, the aforementioned 'Anonymous Cowards' materialise out of the ether. They say that God moves in mysterious ways, either that or he is sitting uncomfortably and needs Preparation H.

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Microsoft talks open-source love amid TomTom Linux 'war'

Lager And Crisps

...'anonymous'?

It would appear as if there are more 'anonymous cowards' than copies of Agent Smith from Matrix Reloaded, and they all say the same damn things.

LEAVE MICROSOFT ALONE.....!!!!

and

LINUX IS BAD, LINUX ATE MY PUPPY AND LINUX IS BAD.....!!!!

You gotta laugh.

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Lager And Crisps
Happy

....and here we gather for the Swedish Chief.

@ Lager And Crisps

By Anonymous Coward Posted Friday 27th February 2009 20:51 GMT

You wrote:

a) Why is Microsoft this taking action now?

The answer, you muppet, is to get the money that MS are rightly owed as a result of Tom Tom stealing their IP.........

And I'm a muppet?

You can say one of many things regarding Microsoft and this entire episode. They are scared of Linux and Open Source. The people that rely on Microsoft, even more so.

My last comment irritated a 'Microsoftie' so much as to respond in person,

Make of that what you will.

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Lager And Crisps
Happy

...the Microsoft appreciation society, come on down!!!

If you judge the progress and quality of Linux and Open Source by the actions of the competition (in this case Microsoft), then both are doing very nicely thank you.

And if this was not enough to prove the point, you now have poor embattled 'anonymous cowards' (or Microsoft's hardcore user-base) rising to defend their beleaguered masters, bless them.

If none of the above was true, a) Why is Microsoft this taking action now, and b) Why do the aforementioned 'anonymous cowards' descend on The Register in their droves and spew this drivel:

"The anti MS comments you make are pathetic. MS is a hugely successful company, that is getting stronger and stronger by the day (look at financial results before you start ranting, it is all about the $$ and MS makes more and more every year....). The irony is that you are probably on the dole, sitting in your smelly little bedsit surrounded by dirt and soiled gentleman’s literature. You do not have the right to criticise MS. If they offered you a job, you would jump at it. But they never will, because you are a technical nobody."

LOL!

By my calculations 1+1=2. Simple really.

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Judge strips MS 'Vista Capable' lawsuit of class action status

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

Well, what did you expect...?

I think what you are seeing here is just how much money Microsoft put into lawyers and advertising rather than research and development (and yes I am aware a recent shareholder revolt on the supposed frivolous expenditure on R and D that lead to nothing profitable).

And to Microsoft's apologist in residence (Anonymous Coward, never was a moniker so apt), people do get mighty ticked off when they see that the law of the land can be bought by the corporate elite. Civil or criminal, the outcome sold to the highest bidder.

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Opera sings praises of Microsoft-browser statement

Lager And Crisps
Black Helicopters

...intersting, with a touch of de-ja vu!!!

Judging by many of the comments above my post, one would naturally think you guys had something to lose in Microsoft's Internet Explorer not being the default web browser on every PC in the known universe. Do you guys have something to gain in keeping the status quo?

Opera may or may not have a legitimate issue with Microsoft's business practices in Europe, but are you people posting on a UK website from America, somewhere around Redmond?

I doubt this comment will even be shown in this section, do not upset the corporate sponsors and all (of coarse I will make it available on other sites, and by other means). But I do know this, if you depend on the Microsoft infrastructure (MCSE, MVP, .NET/VB programmers etc) , you will decry anything BUT Microsoft. This is after all, your duty.

I have cut and pasted this reply into other forums across the web, it would be nice to know a UK website was not dependent on an American company for anything more.

Black helicopters? Who owns your PC, I'm not sure if I own the computer I'm typing this on?

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Jaunty Jackalope alpha 3 spotted in wild

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...mmm!

If you are a Linux user , you will accept Ubuntu's unconventional naming of their respective releases, even if they do not appeal to you. You will then judge that particular release on it's merits.

If you are a Windows user, all you need to know is that Ballmer frowns at you if you do not buy the latest version of Windows. And if you do not orgasm over the keyboard and monitor about this, the latest version of Windows, YOU NEED HELP!

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Microsoft sharpens axe as PC sales drop?

Lager And Crisps
Unhappy

R.E. kain preacher/IGnatius T Foobar

Microsoft has been convicted in America, Europe and Asia for various crimes. I bet you get all your information from MSN.

To IGnatius T Foobar. I hate Microsoft's business practices and lack of moral ethics as much as the next rabid penguin loving Linux user, but to wish loss of employment and livelihood on 91,000 people in these dark times...well I'm lost for words on how to reply.

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Microsoft's Silverlight 'so good' it claims Netflix tech jobs

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...never seen MS do this before!!!

Replace one of their own technologies (after getting others to spend time and money) with another. Microsoft are always pulling the plug, even on their own Frankenstein creations.

As another poster has already said, Microsoft don't want Silverlight working on older versions of their own software. How long before Silverlight too is phased out for the next big thing.

Microsoft PAY companies to use their software either directly or indirectly. Incentives...? Why not call it what it realy is, BRIBERY! How much is Netflix getting so Microsoft can tout their crapware in advertising campaigns?

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Israeli Linux fan squeezes Windows refund out of Dell

Lager And Crisps
Stop

...are you for real?

'What's the problem here?

Laptops don't work without Windows installed so what's the point in buying one without it? Surely it's cheaper than buying your own copy of Windows afterwards?

Or was he just annoyed because he wanted to use a ripped-off copy?

Freetard!'

I think you should go forthwith to a vasectomy clinic and reserve an appointment for a consultation with a specialist. The sooner you are removed from the genepool the better for us all. These people should not breed and need to be sterilized.

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World goes mad as Bill and Jerry eat churros

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...lost in translation?

Do people in the USA go for this type of thing?

In the words of America's only contribution to the English speaking world (Homer Simpson)...doh!

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MSI intros cut-price Linux mini-laptop

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...need!

I just need to get my fix of the Ballmer with horns icon. I know, I should be quarantined and my reproductive privileges revoked.

I just need...you know...need...

Thank you Register, that feels so much better now.

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Cops cuff anti-drug ninja vigilantes

Lager And Crisps
Paris Hilton

...and in other news!

Maybe the local drug lords gave the police a heads-up. Since most of the police are probably in the employ of these American 'entrepanours', I would expect nothing less (as long as they pay their taxes).

In the USA it is against the law to carry certain types of weapons, but to possess a gun is to be part of the fabled 'American way'.

Paris, is she not American (tenuous, I know)?

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Anatomy of a malware scam

This post has been deleted by a moderator

Jeery Jerry loves Vista, y'know

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...pass me the superglue and a toilet roll!

$10,000,000 to fix Vista'a problems without actually fixing them. Genius...if it can work.

But I think this sum of money is balderdash and piffle compared to the amounts they are spending behind the scenes. The big picture is that they buy entire sovereign nations and bribe supposed independent standards bodies to comply with their demands (OOXML). As long as they bribe the right people, you can guarantee this will continue.

Seinfeld, why not pick a comedian to plug a joke product. Is that a rhetorical question?

And the title of this post? That famous childrens TV classic accomplished miracles with everyday items that Microsoft can only dream about. I now find myself believing Vista was constructed on Blue Peter in the mid-seventies with help from Shep the dog and that obligatory toilet roll. Was it superglue or double-sided sticky tape?

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Microsoft's Vista push probed by Fair Trade Commission

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...same as it ever was!

When Microsoft has to use it's billions to enforce acceptance of it's latest product, something somewhere is very wrong.

Nobody wants Vista except Microsoft and the hardware vendors you need to buy from to upgrade to Vista in the first place.

Am I one of the few people to realise this sad state of affairs?

...same as it ever was! ...same as it ever was! ...same as it ever was!

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ISO rejects Office Open XML appeal (redux)

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Halo

...tell me you didn't see this one coming?

Cue the Microsoft aplogists in 3-2-1...

...gentlemen, start your engines!!!

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Microsoft starts stoking hype for Windows 7

Lager And Crisps
Joke

...and so it was in the beginning!

I just do not understand the mass ingratitude directed towards Microsoft. If it was not for messrs Gates and Ballmer you lot would be using Apple (imitators par excellence) or even Linux ('a cancerous polyp on the anus of humanity'-thanks Red Dwarf).

Bill Gates single-handedly invented this Internet thingie (or was it Al Gore?) that you lot seem to like, passing fad as it is. Microsoft is the embodiment of innovation and 'cloud computing' is just one of the latest heaven sent ideas to spring from the Redmond campus. Microsoft leads, others follow.

And when they, in all their majesty, give unto a grateful world the saviour that is 'Windows 7' shall all know the enlightened truth. Just as Moses was the prophet (or is that profit?) for the Lord thy God, Vista should be considered in kind towards 'Windows 7'. In fact if you are the most righteous and holy of people, you should go out an buy as many copies of Vista as possible. May Satan suckle on you testicles if you refuse in this God given task.

We all recognise that it is only a matter of time before Bill Gates is canonized by the Pope for his charity to mankind. And also that Ballmer's most holy words 'Developers! Developers! Developers! Developers!' shall become the new trinity, +1. Just as Muslims make the pilgrimage to Mecca, in the years to come the devout shall journey to Redmond. Praise be.

And to my brothers 'Anonymous Coward', hallelujah!

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Windows XP crashes out of Olympics?

Lager And Crisps
Happy

re: aL

...and yay, I spotted one of those 'hangers-on' I mentioned earlier. How is the weather in Redmond anyway?

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Lager And Crisps
Paris Hilton

...and if this was Linux?

Microsoft would splash the headline across the IT world in an instant., as would their merry band of hangers-on (lol, who leeches from who?).

If it is hardware failure, then this is something the quality of the operating system can't always mitigate against.

I enjoy poking fun at Microsoft and their 'lusers' becasue so often they deserve it. But in this case I will give them the benefit of the doubt until further information is forthcoming.

I honestly don't think the Chinese knew or cared what OS was running the show. No one expected this.

Why Hilton? Because i'd rather be in Paris than Beijing.

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Is Microsoft's Silverlight evil?

Lager And Crisps
Gates Horns

...those damn roaches!

With Microsoft inspired lingo such as 'freetard', 'lunix' and 'communist' you can only draw one conclusion...

...yes the Microsoft AstroTurfing Circus is back in town.

Roll up, roll up, roll up. Ladies and Gentlemen...send in the clowns (in rush Ballmer and Gates tripping over each other and getting up to much pointless tomfoolery). Oh dear Ladies and Gentlemen, that was our only act...

...But tomorrow come one, come all for exactly the same show but it shall contain improved custard pie throwing and an even sillier comedic repertoire. We promise.

You just know the usual suspects will turn up for another round of 'they're extracting the urine out of our beloved Microsoft again, MAN THE PUMPS!!'.

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Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...not now, and now not ever!

1: Do not trust Microsoft.

2: Do not trust anything they say.

3: Do not trust anything they do.

4: Do not trust anything they produce.

5: Do not trust anything they are involved with.

6: See point number 1.

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Microsoft to kill Windows with 'web-centric' Midori?

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...not this again!

If Midori is indeed a tangible product and not just a concept or vapourware then it must be avoided at all costs.

If Microsoft thinks this is a good idea then you can bet this is bad for everyone else. It will be just another lock-in mechanism, a revenue stream to screw business and consumer alike. There is just too much opportunity for Microsoft to indulge in the monopoly tacticts it always has. This just takes it to the next level.

Would you trust ANY company with your private data let alone Microsoft?

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Microsoft Mojave 'outs' secret Vista lovers

Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...'Mojave', a desert. How apt!

The premise of this 'Mojave' scheme brought a smile to my face. An entire website devoted to try and counter a perceived public bias and apathy. By it's very existance this is proof positive of this whole Vista folly. None of the footage was spontaneous and of the cuff, and some of the comments from those taking part was just asinine. All stagemanaged and scripted and not very well at that.

To tell people to try Vista before they criticise it is one thing (can't argue with that if you can try before you buy). But to then turn round to those that have purchased legitimate copies of Vista and don't like it with the response of 'Well your just wrong!' and 'You don't get it!' gets my goat.

The people in the know are either sticking with Windows 2000/XP or moving to Linux. And those with a little extra cash are jumping ship altogether and getting a Mac. None of this is what Microsoft expected because of their short sighted arrogance.

Build a better Windows and the people will come. Give the consumer what they ask for and not what you want and you will salvage something of your now sullied reputation.

Is it that impossible a task?

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Lager And Crisps
Jobs Horns

...oooohhhh! aaaahhhh! shiny shiny!

Nuff said!!!

*looks around for Sam the spelling and grammar checker before submitting*

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Microsoft readies XP for One Laptop Per Child computer

Lager And Crisps
Thumb Up

...Sam

Thanks Sam, I stand corrected.

*mumbles something about the duff keyboard he's using*

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Lager And Crisps
Happy

...R.E.bah humbug!

How did you type your response, did they loosen the restraints?

I know, you where using Vista's built in speech recognition system. You can tell because the grammar and spelling is a little off.

Was it hard to see what was in the content of your post because of all the spittle and phlegm that had congealed on the monitor?

And why keep posting as 'Anonymous Coward'?

I just love Microsofties, always a tenuous grasp on reality.

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