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* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

9765 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

My TIGHT PANTS made my HUGE iPHONE go all BENDY!

Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

So we are into phacesitting now?

Oh beautiful 21st century of amazements and sheer wonder.

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4chan outraged by Emma Watson nudie photo leak SCAM

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Vinegar Tits.....

gb2 /b/, *****

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Holmes

Re: Just for my own piece of mind...

So Emma Watson is just collateral damage in .... a marketroid campaign performed by people who can't into securing the Apache webserver status page?

We are reaching "CoS pulling a Xenu" levels of QUALITY here.

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Trollface

Re: Why is it called the flappening?

But there is no shlickening?

Not enough feminism, I say!

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Heatmiser digital thermostat users: For pity's sake, DON'T SWITCH ON the WI-FI

Destroy All Monsters
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Coat

"I don't understand the obsession people have with adjusting thermostats."

It's the new "cooller app"

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Trollface

Adequate webservers are small, very cheap and available under "industry-friendly" terms

A security issue has been identified on our WiFi Thermostat…

The issue consists in the fact that it exists.

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Ordnance Survey intern plonks houses, trees, rivers and roads on GB Minecraft map

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: No Profit

This would mean the going price is 36x the YoY profit? Clearly a generational game.

"Who's your co-pilot?" asked PDP-1 Kenobi.

"Two Bacco, here, my Bookie."

"Odds aren't good," said the brownish lump beside him, and then fell silent, or over.

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Pint

Liverpool underground nightclubs!

Did they include REMAINS of druidic underground passages opening on stairways guarded by GIGANTIC STONES leading to VAST, HIDDEN abysses wherein waft NEPHITIC VAPORS of SHOCKING DECAY and the faint sound of MAD PIPING and DRUMMING coming from the UTTER DARKNESS below is just an indication that here lurks UTTER TERROR that is best left alone?

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Le whoops! Microsoft France boss blows lid off 'Windows 9' event

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Paris Hilton

Re: There's little wrong with the bones of Windows 8.

The mere fact that "it's not Windows 8" will move a ton of copies, since the whole "every second version is crap" pattern is widely believed.

But has anyone outside of late-night geek talking circles ever heard of it?

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Coat

The Council has Spoken!

"On September 30, we will be providing an update on what’s next for Windows and the enterprise."

Death?

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jQuery site popped to serve malware slop

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FAIL

What's going on here??

El Reg:

jQuery security bods found no evidence that its site was foisting the drive-by download however

RISKIQ:

After verifying that the site was indeed redirecting users to a malware dropper, we immediately contacted jQuery.com to alert them to the attack. While they weren’t able to determine the root cause of the attack, the site’s administrators were addressing the issue.

Hitting this redirector, we continued to be redirected to the RIG exploit kit, even though we weren't able to replicate the script injection on jQuery.com with subsequent requests.

So what's the actual status?

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SpaceX Dragon cargo truck flies 3D printer to ISS: Clawdown in 3, 2...

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Windows

In a more interesting universe...

... the ISS would host a wormhole portal and SpaceX would bring down rare artifacts and mysterious specimens from unknown biospheres.

Fruit flies? PAH!

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Swiss cops BAN MASKS at meeting of rebellious United Nations IP staff

Destroy All Monsters
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A pox on all their houses

> prestigious organisation which deserves respect,

Pretentious organization which deserves all the disrespect one can muster?

Why anyone would freely choose to work there is beyond me.

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What makes you think this is the case?

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GRAV WAVE DRAMA: 'Big Bang echo' may have been grit on the scanner – boffins

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Paris Hilton

Andrei Linde's theory of cosmic inflation – that for a few moments the expansion of space exceeded the speed of light.

I am shocked! I always thought that Alan Guth came up with inflation and that Andrei Linde only tacked the "inflationary multiverse" idea onto this, whereby the visible universe is just a local region of a forever inflating bubbly multiverse, where the various regions of that multiverse may or may not have varying values for natural constants. This idea is somewhat romantic though largely content-free and to all likelihood forever unverifiable. Not to be confused with the stringy multiverse whereby there are alternate realities that exist in some sort of quantum superverse, an idea which is content-free-er and frankly bonkers metaphysical.

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Moon landing was real and WE CAN PROVE IT, says Nvidia

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Alien

Ayyy lmao

Humanity is pretty good at covering up the existence of aliens and feeding goats to aliens who also mutilate cows in alien ways, meanwhile conspiring with aliens to modify human DNA, possibly via bees carrying alien nanovirus, and re-electing politicians controlled by aliens and having aliens take honorary seats at the trilateral commission while unfairly stealing and reverse-engineering the technology of creative aliens as well as crashed alien craft where we hide the alien corpses in nitrogen-cooled fridges, so that even the aliens do not notice that they are being taken for an alien rickroll.

We are actually the masters of Soviet-Style "technology transfer". Just pray there is no alien WIPO out there, otherwise that's gonna be costly.

Humans fuck year!

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Pint

Re: Return journey

If asteroids (etc) mass is/are reduced via mining, could that affect their trajectory (especially in regards to gravitational pull from other masses) and therefore endanger the earth?

Evidently, you need to blast chunks uniformly at random in all directions to keep the vector sum of momentum changes at 0. This is also called "goan fish curry mining".

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Re: models

> I call fake ;(_ The shadows are wrong!

Damn, this looks like a shot from a movie version of "The Martian Chronicles".

Oh, melancholy.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Headmaster

Re: To all conspiracy muppets out there

Why are there no STARS in space?....Not a single spec of light anywhere on the NASA photos?

Because NASA was totally fecking clueless and got some cheap black-painted dome installed by barely-literate chinese migrant workers instead of properly hiring Stanley Kubrick to do full-star awesome super-effects like he did a year earlier with "2001 - A Space Odyssey".

It's simple really. Then they had to set up O.J. Simpson for murder because the Mars Landing Project bombed when the Face on Mars was discovered (and what was underneath) and whistles got blown out of proportion, but that is another horror story involving Agent Orange and Oswald.

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Oz carrier Tiger Air takes terror alerts to new heights

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Big Brother

Unserious about Emmanuel Goldstein?

I am extremely dismayed and shocked. It is good that private companies step up to the plate and nip this kind of antisocial behaviour in the bud.

A visit to the Ministry of Love for reeducation should be mandatory.

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Home Depot ignored staff warnings of security fail laundry list

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Get a proofreader.

The Wifi connection from the pub downstairs will now be taken away!

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Report: EE in talks to scoop up 60 Phones 4u stores from troubled High Street retailer

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Re: "pick over the carcass"

On the other hand, Phones4U has no god-given (or govt-mandated) right to play as an intermediary of the carrier and the customer.

It may exploit a niche for some time, but niches have the nasty tendency to close.

"Capitalism" is not about preservation.

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'Kim Kardashian snaps naked selfies with a BLACKBERRY'. *Twitterati gasps*

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: is it just me....

Reptilian sex is not very exciting though.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Removal

That kind of prayer might well lead to a liberating action by the US air force. You don't want that.

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Trollface

Re: Whilst the security failure is worrying...

Apparently someone needs to cover up the latest economic data underneath sex-suffused front page gossip?

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Facebook's Oculus unveils 360-degree VR head tracking Crescent Bay prototype

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Re: headphones

You take the Red Pill - and I will show you how deep the Oculus Rift goes!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: The Glorious Age of VR Waifus, Begun it Has!

Found it on the tube: Goddamit Japan!!

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Alien

The Glorious Age of VR Waifus, Begun it Has!

I think this is still tongue-in-cheek:

Japan’s Health Ministry Fears Summer Lesson Will Destroy Population, Begs Sony Not to Release Game

Announced at Sony’s Tokyo Game Show press conference, Summer Lesson is a virtual reality game where it appears you will tutor a Japanese schoolgirl using Project Morpheus. If this is released, public officials fear Japan’s population will hit zero before 2100.

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“There is no turning back if this game is released,” explained population scientist Akita Osamu, “Japan’s population is already under attack and Summer Lesson will be the finishing blow. It is already affecting Japan as we speak. I am currently single and I have already pre-ordered this game earlier today. I will die alone and that is perfectly fine with me and Nahoko which is the name of the girl I have chosen for Summer Lesson.”

Even Japan’s prime minister Shinzo Abe personally went out of his way to beg Sony CEO Kazuo Hirai to prevent the release of this game. Unfortunately, Hirai said that it was out of his hands arguing that Japan would eventually fall victim to a game like Summer Lesson and believed it would be most honorable if Japan did it to themselves rather than having a game from the American Oculus Rift do it.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Trollface

Re: Will they make a christmas release?

They are probably setting up another kickstarter campaign?

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iPhone 6: The final straw for Android makers eaten alive by the data parasite?

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Re: Emerging markets

I also noticed that in the new TV show "Glue" all the teen kids on that have Nokia Lumia phones

But this be just product placement, innit?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

iPhone - not yet dead as disco, but the undertaker is taking measures

New iPhones at last means that Android, Google's smartphone middleware, will soon look attractive only for budget vendors selling into fast-growing emerging markets.

As Trevor Pott would say: "It may be a niche market, but it's the only niche that counts!"

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India vs America: Earthling invaders in race to MARS

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War in the Pocket!

It would be awesome if these where like giant robots and stuff and a fistfight or a flaming-sword-fight would break out on the way.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Devil

Re: oh well

I think the US should be spending it's cash on bringing the basic necessities to it's provincial population

I'm sorry?? I can't hear you over the noise of all the money printing and bomb-dropping.

Also: "MILITARY CUT THE BONE AND MORE." Then MRAPs turn up at granny's police shack....

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Blood-crazed Microsoft axes Trustworthy Computing Group

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Devil

WTF am I reading?

security and privacy programs getting folded into

1) Cloud & Enterprise Division

Ahah? Hah!

2) Legal & Corporate Affairs group

MUAHAHAHA!

Tacking to windward no longer? Methinks that ship has get some water in them holds and will soon feel the fury of hackery blunderbusses!!

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TOR users become FBI's No.1 hacking target after legal power grab

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Trollface

I feel the cold wind jammering mine bones!

Is it talk like a pirate day again already???

ARR! Download ahead, that Orlowski fiend shall have no restin' for our wickedness!

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Stray positrons caught on ISS hint at DARK MATTER source

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: "It think that should be "when dark matter particles decay all by their lonesome"."

Ah yes. You are correct of course. Sorry, more coffee is needed.

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Paris Hilton

Re: "It think that should be "when dark matter particles decay all by their lonesome"."

I have never heard of dark matter annihilation, but decay, yes:

Synopsis: Sterile Neutrino as Dark Matter Candidate

A hypothetical neutrino that does not interact through the weak force could be the source of a recently detected x-ray emission line coming from galaxy clusters. However, previous models using this so-called “sterile” neutrino as a form of dark matter were not able to satisfy constraints from cosmological observations. Now, writing in Physical Review Letters, Kevork Abazajian of the University of California, Irvine, shows that a sterile neutrino with a mass of 7 kilo-electron-volts (keV) could be a viable dark matter candidate that both explains the new x-ray data and solves some long-standing problems in galaxy structure formation.

Cosmologists have long considered neutrinos as possible dark matter particles. However, because of their small mass (less than about 1 eV), conventional neutrinos are too fast, or “hot,” to form the dense dark matter structures needed to hold galaxies and galaxy clusters together. By contrast, sterile neutrinos, which result from certain neutrino theories, can have larger masses and could have been naturally produced in the big bang by neutrino flavor mixing.

The problem has been that sterile neutrinos should decay, producing an x-ray signal that no one has observed—until maybe now. Earlier in 2014, an analysis of galaxy cluster data revealed an x-ray emission line, which is consistent with the decay of a 7-keV sterile neutrino. Normally, dark matter with this mass would be too “warm” to match galaxy data. However, Abazajian showed that the sterile neutrinos could have a “cooler” momentum distribution if they were produced through resonantly enhanced neutrino flavor mixing (the MSW effect). When Abazajian plugged this neutrino into a cosmological model, he found it could explain both the small number of Milky Way satellite galaxies and their central densities, which have eluded the currently favored cold dark matter model. – Michael Schirber

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Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

> when dark matter particles collide and annihilate each other.

It think that should be "when dark matter particles decay all by their lonesome".

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Balancing the balance

Place a call to your central bank which will give you all the dark currency you will ever need ... if you have political backing or can reasonably explain that your not buying the car will cause irreparable harm to Main Street.

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Microsoft's axeman Nadella fills baskets with 2,100 fresh heads

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Paris Hilton

Re: Nadella fills baskets with 2,100 fresh heads ?

> considering some journalists really ARE being decapitated

Yeah, but on the other hand, civilians are being hellfired and droned to death, so I suppose we can no longer talk about "going to hell" and "the manager's continuous, mindless droning?"

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Robespierrella!

Poor taste, that's a lot of families going to have a harder Christmas this year.

Microsoft is not in the business of giving people happy Christmas memories.

In truth, if the Next Big Crash comes before Christmas, then ...

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Home Depot: 56 million bank cards pwned by malware in our tills

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Coat

...Till Malware Shall Part Us Forever

It's a sad story...

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First day of Hurd'n'Catz at Oracle: It's dis-fur-pointing for Wall St

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Trollface

Not a problem. I hear beer is up!

Newsflash To Fed: 122 Billion Bottles Of Beer On The Wall Is About Asset Bubbles, Not Jobs

The item in question is a $122 billion globally syndicated loan to facilitate an Mergers & Acquisition deal between the world’s two largest beer companies—AB InBev with a 20% global market share and SABMiller with 10%. Needless to say, the only possible reason for creating a monstrosity with $60 billion in sales spread among scores of highly differentiated regional and national beer markets is the “synergy” euphemism—-that is, the “savings” from thousands of job terminations especially in those two paragons of job growth known as North America and Europe.

...

In fact, at the rumored $122 billion, the loan now brewing would amount to 6.5X free cash flow. In a no-growth business in a world where interest rates must eventually normalize–that is sheer lunacy. But it well explains why our monetary politburo is so reluctant to let interest rates normalize and is so deathly afraid of a Wall Street hissy fit.

None of this would happen in a world with honest interest rates and stable two-way capital markets for the simple reason that the financing could not be raised; boards and CEOs would have no momentum driven stock market inducing them to engage in patently irrational mergers; and, in any event, short sellers would swiftly punish serial roll-up machines that destroy rather than create sustainable economic value.

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What's this 'pay as you go' cloud crap? Dunno about you, but my apps don't work that way

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Re: Is this even controversial?

> What people did before the cloud was hyped.

Windows?!?!!!

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PORTAL TO ELSEWHERE scried in small galaxy far, far away

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But the matter inside it is presumably what has the AM?

No, the AM is an attribute of the Black Hole. How it looks on the other side of the event horizon we are not sure about. In GR, a (noncharged, nonspinning) BH you are handed a new time axis of finite length pointing "inwards" to the center, which is bad prognosis for the falling traveler, but string theory as other ideas, and then there is the gravastar, too.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Also, that title!

Astroboffins spot PORTAL TO ELSEWHERE in small galaxy far, far away

Yes, quite likely directly into the universe's best implementation of blend-it-all Moulinex.

Which reminds me of Greg Egan's "Glory" (not his best story, but still):

Pirit hesitated. “Did you come through the Cataract?”

The Cataract was a black hole, a remote partner to the Noudah's sun; they orbited each other at a distance of about eighty billion kilometers. The name came from its telescopic appearance: a dark circle ringed by a distortion in the background of stars, like some kind of visual aberration. The Tirans and Ghahari were in a race to be the first to visit this extraordinary neighbor, but as yet neither of them were quite up to the task.

“Through the Cataract? I think your scientists have already proven that black holes aren't shortcuts to anywhere.”

“Our scientists aren't always right.”

“Neither are ours,” Joan admitted, “but all the evidence points in one direction: black holes aren't doorways, they're shredding machines.”

Take-away: Don't go there.

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Thumb Down

Re: Black Hole belongs in Alice in Wonderland

Weird physcal theories with not particular reason to exist and dollops of ranting?

----->------- alt.sci.physics.alternative ----->-------

that it is not physical, and that singularities in his gravitational field nullify the theory of General Relativity

We know that it is not physical, genius. He was also talking about singularities (the hint in in "singular", geddit?) not black holes, which are trivial consequences of GR. Singularities are unphysical because GR is a classical theory living in a real-valued infinitely dense manifold. There are serious reasons to believe this is not actually where we currently are.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Who is afraid of gravitational waves, then?

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Paris Hilton

> you could transfer that AM to the black hole perhaps.

But first you need to get your friendly mass on a trajectory that inersects the event horizon. This doesn't happen that easily unless you are already very close.

Of course, one absorbtion occurs, any momentum remainder will then transferred to the slightly embiggened black hole, as is the local universal custom.

These holes are probably bathed in a cloud of dark matter (sterile neutrinos or whatnot) and probably getting few from that sector, too. I wonder how much they gain over a billion years just via DM?

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Driving with an Apple Watch could land you with a £100 FINE

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Paris Hilton

Jumping the iShark

Where there similar warnings in the days of the Tamagotchi?

I won't even go into Mr Hamill's naysaying about any Apple product in existence, ever. And maybe even those never in existence, inside the event horizons of Black Holes and out there in the Tegmark IV multiverse.

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