* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

13565 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

Shedload of security bugs squashed in iOS 9 – what the hell went wrong with iOS 8?

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: How is this any different than anyone else's OS?

It's a Bad Thing now, and a Worse Thing later.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: IOS less than perfect?

As soon as we manage to get out of the Apple Reality Distortion Warp, Cardinal!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: C'mon. It's 1998 all over again

+1 for this reference! Your name is Watson.

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Microsoft's 'anti-malware Device Guard' in Windows 10: How it works, what you need

Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

Don't get this.

This looks like they want to use Virtual Machines to keep the secrets and prevent the code running outside of it to get IN? That's arse-backwards.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

Re: Fine for exes...

How does what you write even make sense?

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Tech turned on its head: 'Dislike' button in Facebook, pay Snapchat $1 to defuse self-destructing sexy selfies

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Love the article picture...

It's a free image, so no.

These kids seem to also be on a dangerous drug regime of gremlinaphine and caffeine.

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Twitter sued for 'reading' private direct messages

Destroy All Monsters
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Facepalm

Next up

How compressing a data stream is actually "reading it". Give me some money!!

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BAN the ROBOT WHORES, says robot whore expert: 'These AREN'T BARBIES'

Destroy All Monsters
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Trollface

The Polish King Of Cybernetics Satire predicted ...

In Stanislaw Lem's "The Washing Machine Tragedy", we read:

Shortly after my return from the Eleventh Voyage, the papers began to devote increasing space to the competition between two large washing-machine manufacturers, Newton and Snodgrass.

...

Buying up the appropriate rights and licenses from interested parties for a sum of one million dollars, [Snodgrass] constructed, for bachelors, a washing machine endowed with the proportions of the renowned sexpot Mayne Jansfield, in platinum, and another, the Curlie McShane model, in black. Sales immediately jumped 87 percent. His opponent appealed to Congress, to public opinion, to the DAR, and to the PTA. But when Snodgrass kept supplying stores with washers of both sexes, more and more beautiful and seductive, Newton gave in and introduced the custom-built washers, which received the figure, coloring, size, and likeness chosen by the customer according to the photograph enclosed with his order. While the two giants of the washing-machine industry thus engaged in all-out war, their products began to exhibit unexpected and dangerous tendencies. The wet-nurse washers were bad enough, but washers that led to the ruin of promising young men and women, that tempted, seduced, and taught bad language to children — they were a serious family problem, not to mention washers with which one could cheat on one’s husband or wife! Those manufacturers of washing machines who still remained in business told the public, in ads, that the Jansfield-McShane washer represented an abuse of the high ideals of automated laundering (which was intended, after all, to strengthen and support the domestic way of life), since this washer could hold no more than a dozen handkerchiefs or one pillowcase, the rest of its interior being occupied by machinery that had not a thing to do with laundering — quite the contrary. These appeals had no effect. The snowballing cult of beautiful washers even tore a considerable part of the public away from their television sets. And that was only the beginning. Washers endowed with full spontaneity of action formed clandestine groups and engaged in shady operations. Whole gangs of them entered into cahoots with criminal elements, became involved with the underworld, and gave their owners terrible problems.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Very one sided arguement

Definitely not easily amused.

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Paris Hilton

Expert/Sexpert?

Expert calls for ban on robot prostitutes

Expert in what, actually? Certainly not robot sex and gynoids.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Gimp

Re: what about child sex-bots?

Wouldn't give a fuck, as I'm not into victimless crime sniffing.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Megaphone

Re: Is this a joke?

these radical feminists continue to become even sillier

"Sir! I will enjoin you to stop your out-of-line micro-aggressions ONCE ONLY, otherwise I WILL have to call campus police!"

(Finally a good use of the megaphone)

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Destroy All Monsters
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Trollface

Re: Ok, here goes

No, it was "DON'T FIST ANDROID GIRLS".

You may want to google the warning sticker.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Would..

not that I watch or read the latter

...except for research purposes, of course.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Terminator

Re: Demarcation?

Commander Data was supposed to be 'fully functional'

I see. Big Data. Say no more...

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

cyber dildonics was a reference to Professor Kevin Warwick?

No, I distinctly remember Fred Brooks (of "Mythical Man-Month" fame) use it derogatorily in the very early 90's in a lecture about the possibilites of VR (still in its very infancy back then).

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Pleas

Rachael?

But it was Priss who was a joy-use replicant.

Might have been underage in some colonies, too.

BAM!!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Gimp

Re: Deathbots good. Sexbots bad.

No-one is currently pining for cruxifiction and witchburn bots yet except maybe medieval terror trolls ISIS, so no.

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Masses of Brit IT bods embroiled in leak riddle

Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

Re: Riddle me this

Hmmmm...... Opus Dei?

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'To read this page, please turn off your ad blocker...'

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Re: They say it's just a few ¢, I costs me $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

I'd love to read NYT and WaPo at will

To find out how we are being lied into the next few wars and how money printing is good for you?

Seriously, just drop them.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Flame

No necon post any longer?

... so what.

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PSST! You wanna iPhone 6S Plus? YOINK! You can't have one - Apple

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Paris Hilton

Ming the Merciless says...

Analyst Ming-Chi Kuo .... says a problem ... could result in a shortage of handsets.

A shortage relative to what?

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The Register and heise Launch Continuous Lifecycle Conference in the UK

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Pint

Re: Congrats, Team Reg!

Den Tipperary Song, wenn ich bitten darf!

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Curiosity Rover's OS has backdoor bug

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Paris Hilton

Re: Edge conditions.

Err... jake?

There are dedicated "testers" for that who don't actually program.

Mashing these two activities up into single person is not good practice. At all.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Un gran formaggio?

quatrofromaggio and other disgraces

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Destroy All Monsters
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Formaggio makes Fromaggio out of VxWorks

Come on Reg

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Storage device reported stolen from insurer RSA's data centre

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Windows

...the feel when

9/14 starts the same way as 9/11. Slow.

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: Fancy a ham and cheese 'dry tree trunk' sarnie?

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: "Foods Standard Agency" & "Rotting our bodies" Comments?

Never trust continental steak tartare.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Alien

Re: Campylobacter in a crust?

I like to briefly put it next to my Cobalt 60 storage area for a minute or two, myself.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Tatiflette?

Poke an MP5 in their face for that dangerous egg and the carb part!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Childcatcher

Re: "clearly none of that meat is cooked"

There are rules in the UK to ensure you don't kill anyone.

How does that work then? Seriously...

Related: Drop That Snack! L.A.'s long war against working-class people eating tamales, tacos, Cheetos, and other tasty food

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Destroy All Monsters
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Alien

Nitromethane for humans

Why did homo spanienssapiens invent complex ways to mash together high-calorie protein-fat-merge foodstuff into a portable unit via application of denaturating heat and torture devices like meat hammers?

I must try that.

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Apple fanbois cry (bless) as site motionless during iPhone 6S pre-order wrest

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Windows

Re: Taken down on purpose

Why the hurry though. It's not like the product is gonna disappear or run out on Sunday.

It's like these red "SOLD" stickers put up untidilydiagonally in an artsy way on panels in gardens to give the impression the real estate agent was in a particular hurry (implying sales are awfully brisk) when the market is practically titsup and festering.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Headmaster

Such Inacceptable Heresy!!

Really El Reg, you are asking for the Cupertinian Inquisition here ...

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How did jihadists hack into top UK ministerial emails if no security breach took place?

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Gimp

Re: What's his name ?

You forgot "Al Nusra (prisoner liver-eating)" and "Al Nusra / CIA supported" (recently eliminated by Al Qaeda), "Al Qaeda / Saudi supported with CIA weapons" as well as the "Internet Trolling Jewish Keyboarder Brigade pretending to be Al Nusra".

It's all a bit of a clusterfuck.

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Gimp

Just another hit by Paul Muad'dib

> Your spice transport will be delayed

> Your spice transport will be delayed

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MYSTERIES of remote ICE WORLD PLUTO: New pics BAMBOOZLE boffins

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Re: I wonder what the skiing is like!

Hmmm.....

“Now, you didn’t get much in-suit training Earthside. We didn’t want you to get used to using the thing in a friendly environment. The fighting suit is the deadliest personal weapon ever built, and with no weapon is it easier for the user to kill himself through carelessness. Turn around, Sergeant.

“Case in point.” He tapped a large square protuberance between the shoulders. “Exhaust fins. As you know, the suit tries to keep you at a comfortable temperature no matter what the weather’s like outside. The material of the suit is as near to a perfect insulator as we could get, consistent with mechanical demands. Therefore, these fins get hot — especially hot, compared to darkside temperatures — as they bleed off the body’s heat.

“All you have to do is lean up against a boulder of frozen gas; there’s lots of it around. The gas will sublime off faster than it can escape from the fins; in escaping, it will push against the surrounding ‘ice’, and fracture it … and in about one-hundredth of a second, you have the equivalent of a hand grenade going off right below your neck. You’ll never feel a thing.

“Variations on this theme have killed eleven people in the past two months. And they were just building a bunch of huts.

Come to think of it, the suit doesn't need to be an insulator except for the boots, but you have to get rid off the body heat indeed. Best would be to scoop up some ice and make it gas out, taking the heat with it, right?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Dear {deity} @Will Godfrey

In understand. You will miss the Jihad Show, then....

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Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

Re: Boffins like being baffled

Well, El Reg changed the "baffle" to "bamboozle", which does not sound correct. At all.

Is it a SEO thing?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Cool

Read Haldeman's "The Forever War" for more!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: The Earth still exists

The only thing that ever crashed into Pluto was a Slaver spaceship with a defect hyperdrive shunt.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Coat

Re: wonderous

Ahasuerus, please!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Pint

Re: Impact hyposthesis

It totally looks like the close-up of a cast bronze pipe fitting with additional pelting by a few sand grains.

Probably the same mathematical description somewhere in there, with a scale factor....

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Re: What would really baffle the boffins...

There is one on every ball-shaped object found in the Orion arm .... HOW MANY DID BOEING PRODUCE? DID THEY OUTSOURCE PRODUCTION TO RETICULEANS? WHAT ABOUT THE IP? WOULD AMERICA BE RICH BY NOW? THE COPYRIGHT LOBBY DEMANDS TO KNOW!!

On another tack, I grew up with the movie "2001: A Space Odyssey" in my not-fully-processed-memes register and later (when I could fit together the disparate elements of written stories in my mind), with the book "2001: A Space Odyssey". The book really makes you appreciate the distances involved.

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Intel's 6th gen processors rock – but won't revive PC markets

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Windows

Re: Nothing is going to revive the desktop market

True dat.

I don't even know what kind of deranged mind would downvote the self-evident truth.

The PC market is done and so nineties-oughties. Dead as disco.

Once enterprises again centralize the "desktop experience" on to the blade server in the corner, that market too will be gone.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Re: It's not about the processors

Remember when "glossy" was the new feature to have and parade on tickbox lists? I never found out why.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Well, I heard Visio has now full BPMN processing modeling with simulation included, so there may be a need for more CPU.

Meanwhile

# cat /proc/cpuinfo

"processor : 1, vendor_id : AuthenticAMD, cpu family : 15, model : 107, model name : AMD Athlon(tm) 64 X2 Dual Core Processor 6000+, stepping : 2, cpu MHz : 1000.000, cache size : 512 KB"

Am I stuckist?

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'Hey Siri, it's Obama, what should we do about Iran?'

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Windows

The Siri refugee crisis

"I'm not sure what you want me to change."

How about some hope?

In time for 9/11: Looks like we are back at "cooked intelligence" and (somewhat earlier) Westmoreland's brazen lies about "everything in Vietnam is going extremely well".

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WinPhone community descends into CANNIBALISM and WOE

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Windows

Re: I too work for a corporate dinosaur

Weird problems and incompatibilites with "HP" branded gear is nothing new (even though the actual company carrying that brand has mutated more than a Chernobyl chicken), our HP-UX PA-RISC boxen sometimes demanded a specialist be flown in at top dollar pricing to magically sneeze in the server room.

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