* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

13565 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

German football hero battles Nazi doppelgänger

Destroy All Monsters
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Trollface

The Wehrmacht did nothing wrong!

We believe most Germans look like this.

The reverse medal of "all asians look the same"

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Experts ponder improbable size of Cleopatra's asp

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Slapper?

But old Alex was Macedonian. Not the same as Greek. It's like saying a guy from Mexico is American.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: It's obvious!

Leave "Twilight" out of this, don't ruin everything!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Big Brother

Victor the Nubian Cleaner makes a house call

And now your latent suspicion that she was actually suicided has been awakened.

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'Death star' reaches out invisible hand, rips planet apart

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Re: It's a Holocaust!

end up slightly slower than the original planet, thus forming a tail

I am not convinced. The statistical process should make the debris faster and slower relative to the central mass with equal probability.

Also, remember the Gas Torus Mnemonic: "East takes you out, out takes you west, west takes you in, in takes you east, port and starboard bring you back"

If the debris slow down relative to the central mass, they will fall in and will overtake the planet.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Paris Hilton

It's a Holocaust!

Why is there a "trail" though?

Shouldn't the debris widen around the original cerestroid in a more cloud-like fashion?

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Security researchers face wrath of spy agencies

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Re: The Truth is an Omniscient and Omnipotent Ally and Foe, is it not?*

In a country in which Hillary The Liberal Bombardier can be a presidential candidate with her only asset being that she's a feminal state-power-worshipper instead of a male state-power-worshipper, anything can happen.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Makes a mockery of any of that "Only machines read everthing and we don't use most of it" BS

John Brunner was a genius. One could do worse than re-read his "Shockwaver Rider" / "Stand on Zanzibar" / "The Sheep Look Up" trilogy. Though influenced somewhat by 68' hippiedom, he saw it coming.

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Made you jump! Space to give Earth an asteroid Halloween scare

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Big Brother

Re: That's a huge rock for only spotting it 10 days ago

devote the necessary resources for this

i.e. form a commitee of well-paid worthies that are too senile / not under enough control to vote for the next aggressive movement in some cross-oceanic country which we have always been at war with since yesterday?

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Re: scary video

Cool. It's like Indiana Jones lighting his vintage flashlight and discovering that he's actually IN the pit with the flesh.eating roaches described in the papyrus.

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Holmes

Ominous

The universe is saying "fucking ball of losers". What we gonna do about that?

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WikiLeaks leaks CIA director's private emails – including his nat sec clearance dossier

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Pint

HOLY DOT SHIT

the director ... suggests opening diplomatic channels with the theocracy

Hire that man!

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Microsoft's top lawyer: I have a cunning plan ... to rescue sunk safe harbor agreement

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Mushroom

LOCK AND LOAD!

"This month the old legal system collapsed, but the foundation long ago had crumbled. In recent years it has been apparent that a new century requires a new privacy framework. It's time to go build it."

You stupid fucks even dropped the ball on software patents back in the 90s to gain a little "Market Advantage", literally driving over people's best interests.

Now you pretend you can create a legal Potemkin Village of the Holy Privacy Unicorn which will be respected by out-of-control superbly financed and extremely metastasized state actors?

GO DIE IN A CORNER.

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German Govt mulls security standards for SOHOpeless routers

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Paris Hilton

Gut, Helmut!

But why not give it to some outfit like UL? Less than 3 stars? Don't buy!

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Bosch, you suck! Dyson says VW pal cheated in vacuum cleaner tests

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Paris Hilton

I fail to see the logic

Dyson said it is seeking an injunction and recall in Germany

So there are laws somewhere that demand that vacuum cleaners MUST run at the low power levels seen in completely wild-arse official tests? Which are ground for injunctions? (*)

(*) Low swearword phrase. This phrase may normally include more swearwords than apparent in official testing.

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Another go with MIPS IoT: Imagination unveils new Creator board

Destroy All Monsters
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Pint

Someone has gone to some length to test the boundaries of Direct El Reg Power Posting Protocol (DERPPP) in order to revive the below El Reg Tombstone.

Kudos!!

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That's gotta hurt: NASA suffers attack of the lame Orionids

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Pint

Re: Calling their bluff

Hopefully there will be an immenso-cratero in the middle of the District of Columbia after this is over.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Big Brother

Re: "go outside and look up in the direction of the constellation Orion"

The Sahara desert, Rural India, New Mexico and central china seem to be good candidates at this time.... sorry for the rest of you folks :-)

Getting out in the early morning and looking at the sky all alone will probably open you up for a fast-come/fast-served "signature" drone strike in most of those places.

Sorreeeeyy!!

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Connected kettles boil over, spill Wi-Fi passwords over London

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Why? Does water go off?

IoT: Non-starter until we have C3P0 & R2D2 for full service levels.

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Terror, terror everywhere: Call the filter police, there's a madman (or two) in town

Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

Neocon wrangling

ISIS is NOT funded by Mossad, because they would meet the Saudi representatives while handing over the money. That would lead to fisticuffs.

CIA has plausible deniability as they give boxes of weapons to "moderates" which then "hand over" the goods for safe passage. Well, till recently. Nowadays they are just dropping boxes of TOWs (the "Assad Tamer") and other gear out of airplanes to not be outmanoeuvered by the Assad-supporting Ruskies.

It's never good to be a civilian when confused imperial elephants wallow and you are in a country on the map of zionists.

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Our intuitive AI outperforms (most) puny humans, claims MIT

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Re: Or to put it another less dystopian way...

The intelligence isn't in the machine, its in the people who programmed it.

That kind of vitalist bullshit is trotted out regularly as the last refuge of the denialists (I found that they also start to blabber about God or equally bizarre concepts in the next minute) but it's not true.

- Your intelligence is not in your kid.

- Organizational know-how is not in the CEO or the investor

- The kinetic energy of a locomotive is not in any of its parts

- Capacity for Big Data analysis is not in any of the programmers or even the team

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Destroy All Monsters
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Go

In honor of William Gibson

I should be called "Blue Ant" or "Bigend"

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Let's talk about that NSA Diffie-Hellman crack

Destroy All Monsters
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Re: question for you folks

Where does that come in now?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Mathematics fraud

We have all been hoodwinked by this 'Trust the Math' ivory tower BS.

I think there is a song for you that goes like "Don't know much about the math I took".

EDUCATE YOURSELF, EEJIT!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

Three years ago, James Bamford published an article quoting anonymous former NSA officials stating that the agency had achieved a “computing breakthrough” that gave them “the ability to crack current public encryption.”

That was the article in WiRED, right? I thought he had gone off the deep end...

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Microsoft now awfully pushy with Windows 10 on Win 7, 8 PCs – Reg readers hit back

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Facepalm

The worst is that there are people who sound off from the bottom of the barrel who apparently think that making a difference between a "server OS" and a "desktop OS" is totally natural.

Why, sure.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Windows users have no grounds for complaints

You must have voted for President Shrub.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Big Brother

Re: get real ... it works great

So if your machine can, it is advisable to bite the bullet and invest the time for an upgrade, just backup your important files first for ease of mind.

"Our trains run on time, the streets are clean and there are no beggars anymore. You WILL like it here!"

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Destroy All Monsters
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Pint

Re: Too much mod

Well, it happened! A drink to Reg Moderation.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Devil

Re: Critical server?

Trusting Microsoft?

Mwahahaha!

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Destroy All Monsters
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Big Brother

Re: Well Done

It's like nation states protesting that they are not really evil and would never bomb a hospital knowingly, you muts be mistaken. No wait, it actually happened but iit was an error. No wait, the run was phoned in by our allies who were confused. No wait, the run was phoned in by our guys who were observing the place, but there was a spy from a friendly nation inside who had it coming. Ok, we will look for evidence. What's that? One of our tanks has driven through the rubble, destroying what was left? Welp!

GIVE PASS! RINSE, REPEAT!

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GCHQ to pore over blueprints of Chinese built Brit nuke plants

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Holmes

Re: National infrastructure projects

Possible answers:

1) Absence of imperial stamina: Because the british empire is long gone

2) Economics: They can do it cheaper

3) Warren Buffet economics: We are rich in imaginary wealth and so seem to be able to pay

4) Risk: They are ready to do it at all

5) Critical mass of knowledge: Local know-how has dried up

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Destroy All Monsters
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Devil

"On uncomputable numbers and the Hintereingangstürproblem"

We demonstrably need computational powers about the partial-recursive functions.

BRING ME AN ORACLE!

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Ireland moves to scrap 1 and 2 cent coins

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Re: Finland did this ages ago

> progressive

You are right about that.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

EUROBYL: The catastrophe that just. keeps. on. giving.

Didn't some effing arsehole recently say that "quantiative easing is working"? It's working so well that everyone is jobless, rich people are getting richer and our kids are getting a fat, fat dunning letter before even having been born. While lefties cheer on and demand more of this because they think there is this "austerity" fantasy being implemented.

I remember getting beer for 1c. That was before the EUR though

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Navy engineer gets 11 years for attempted espionage

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enemy combatant

I thought these don't exist anymore as per latest doctrine? Everyone in the World of USA is a Staatsfeind open for presidentially approved droning unless shown not guilty, possibly posthumously.

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Destroy All Monsters
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FAIL

"Commander, tear this apartment apart until you've found those plans..."

Now we will never find the location of the single exhaust vent through which a torpedo can be fired into the reactor core...

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OpenBSD source tree turns 20 – version 5.8 of project preps for show time

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Pint

Excellent!

I hope the Good Work continues and up-modernizes thoughtfully, and not in a systemd way...

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Reg reader escapes four-month lightning-struck Windows Vista farm nightmare

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I daresay!

and as long as you are living next to a minuteman silo, all will be fine!

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Microsoft offers to PAY YOU to trade in your old computer for a Windows 10 device

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Trollface

Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

a subscription fee for Windows cannot be eliminated as a possibility somewhere down the road

I think Nightcall on repeat is best as the new Windows Theme Song.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Germany

The hand that doesn't give taketh away.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

That picture of paid-for spasming, "dancing" youthful beerbellys makes me rage for no particular reason and I have fantasies of going all Taxi Driver on these people's arse. I want to see the pink mist!

Must be my age showing. Or maybe my habitude of being tortured by Microsoft while they laugh at me through addies.

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Post-pub schnellnosh neckfiller: Currywurst

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Paris Hilton

Re: When buying Bratwurst in the streets

Shurely "Der Untergang" would be the highest level of capsaicine terror?

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Euro privacy warriors: You've got until January to fix safe harbor mess – or we unleash hell

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Not since Lincoln the Holy Fascist

There is no one authority about U.S. law. There are 50 states and half a dozen self-governing island territories.

Hey. It's 10:00 in the morning. It smells like gin in here. Who has been drinking?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Bueno!

Actually I hear Juncker The Forever Politician is into Fernet-Branca. I have no idea what that is.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: It's all arse about tit

No refund? No but you can pay in bullets chambered in 5.56 or otherwise.

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Destroy All Monsters
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FAIL

FTFY

The EC already knows that it has to reach agreement rapidly

The EC already knows that it has to roll over and fudge the issue to make legal redress impossible rapidly

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Google, Facebook, Microsoft and buddies stick a bomb under hated CISA cyber-law

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Re: Good grief that was quick!

Well, it's like Rudolph Hess ringing at the Prime Minister's door for some help....

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Microsoft previews cloudy Active Directory Domain Services

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Paris Hilton

you'd find out it can be internal to your network

You mean there will be local Windows 20XX server system doing DirSync with the cloudy master?

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Internet Architecture Board defends users' rights to mod Wi-Fi kit

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Bootleg WIFI routers, courtesy of Nanny State

Truly, the world's major problems are being solved.

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