* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

11262 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

Inside GOV.UK: 'CHAOS' and 'NIGHTMARE' as trendy Cabinet Office wrecked govt websites

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Holmes

Re: Agree--new BBC is a heart-sinker

It's saddening when Al Jazeera actually provides more and indepth coverage of actual news

I don't see how that is saddening. It has also been the case since the Bush II Iraqi pratfall now.

If the US goes to the the length to find the exact hotel room through which a tank projectile shall be "accidentally" lobbed or bothers to blow a marked journalist team off a Baghdad roof by JDAM they must be doing something right.

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Re: Symptom of a much deeper problem.

+1 for The Truth

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Re: Agile everything

RITALINAGILE.

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Facepalm

Re: Fire all the people in charge, now.

And since those in charge made all their designers be coders:

Designers that code?

Go to check that link.

They "code" in HTML and CSS.

kill me now.

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Holmes

Re: Presumably....

"tabletised" web pages

Pretty sure there is a strong positive correlation between tabletization of a website and the merciless dumbing down of offered content (and the increasing length of the Ghostery popup). Not to mention the impossibility of finding the rare left-over nugget not yet shat on by editiorial policy. People then leave...

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Re: Presumably....

Trying to recreate the spirit of the printed paper online, then?

Sadly, you cannot create a left-of-center wrapper for your fries with that!

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HTTP/2 spec gets green light: Faster web or needless complexity?

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Holmes

Re: Complexity leads to bugs which lead to security problems

We live in an age where our computers rival living beings in complexity.

Not really.

It's not like protocol handlers cannot be written with the proof they have been implemented according to specification (of course the spec may be wrong, but that's the way it goes). Protocols are never really complex in any meaningful sense.

It's people faffing around with C and handwritten manglers like medieval hunchbacked differently-abled persons who are the real problem.

Coding in Mercury? Hell yeah.

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Holmes

The Nietzschean eternal rebirth

That would in deed be a very sensible thing to do, as it would also create a boundary between authentication, session handling and the rest of the application. Plus you could do amazing stuff with a minimal amount of code, and since "remote frame buffer" is a fairly well defined set of requirements, we could even support multiple protocols rather easily.

Will "X Terminals" be back? Yes. Yes, they will. Already, we have "remote desktops in the cloud".

We should have stayed with the NeWS of the early 90s. Imagine all that JavaScript horror which could have been avoided (we are now at the maximum entropy NodeJS stage of course, which sounds like someone is implementing a real-world Monty Python sketch for confused people just out of uni, but so be it!)

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Re: i can see myself

@Roo : The real question is: Are you using Erlang?

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Re: yeah but

Quantitative Easing is the answer to everything. Even to bandwidth problems.

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Re: This says it all...

WHERE ARE THE SNOWDENS OF YESTERYEAR?

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Ukraine suddenly 40% more interested in UK tax info – HMRC

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Big Brother

Allocate resources that don't belong to you: Yes we can!

Even countries that do not have a desperate need to shore up their public finances

A nice euphemism for

"The goverrrnmental pirates have wrecked everything out of sheer greed, mismanagement and cronyism and need more. Disregard the multibillion-$CURRENY debthole, that's for the future (or for foreign taxpayers via the IMF)"

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Hoping for spy reforms? Jeb Bush, dangerously close to being the next US prez, backs the NSA

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Paris Hilton

Ron Paul is rather oldish now.

Anything but "I came, I saw, he died" Hillary, basically the liberal-socialist side of old bomber Cain. But Jeb is not an answer.

If only we could have some Hope and Change...

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Watch a hot, speeding space alien explode all over Earth's Beaver

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Re: @Neil deGrasse Tyson

Good enough. Gleisners will follow.

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Which I call 20150217_haemorroid in this animation...

which NASA is calling 20150217_meteoroid in this animation

> Facebook

> Adobe Flash

why.jpg

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BLOOD STAR of the NEANDERTHALS passed close to our Sun

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Re: Alien probes

"Nagios II - Son of Oort"

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Big Brother in SPAACE: Mars One picks first 100 morons to suffocate, er, settle on Red Planet

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That would make them all Cave Johnsons.

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Microsoft's patchwork falls apart … AGAIN!

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Failure circus is fail, followed by "it's not our fault".

This is what happens when you rush regression testing to meet externally imposed arbitrary 90 day deadlines.

We can work fast, or we can work accurate.

...And these 90 day deadlines apparently mean tweaking default values in Muffice is priority #1 and needs to be rolled out stat.

Context: It IS important.

The context being: The codebase is shit and the regression test set is arbitrary and possibly absent. And our dev skillset is arbitrary too. Prima donnas, freshmen and people miscommunicating with their navels trying to deal with arbitrary complexit injected by marketrdroid demands I suppose.

In any normal industry lawyers would be crawling up your arse. And this will happen sooner or later.

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Re: I am getting my coat...

> 2015

> Still savescumming in Word

I hope not

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Windows

And nothing of value ceased to function

...the patch improved nothing, at least for the manu users who report that...

It's the hands of fate!

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Apple LIGHTSABERS to feature in The Force Awakens

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Facepalm

Re: Retrogression of the "Force".

German and Japanese technology actually improved after the war, courtesy of us bombing everything flat. Then the Americans made very generous loans and donations to allow them to rebuild with the latest technology.

This is beyond retarded and just proves a total misunderstanding of how an economy works, it's practically the picture-book-for-6-years-old view of the economy espoused by Keynesians.

1) If you "bomb everything flat" it's over. There isn't even the wherewithal to build the machines to build the machines to build the machines. It's called the capital base. The skillbase is gone too.

2) The "donations" you mention (aka "the Marshal Plan") mainly went to well-connected figures in Sweden and Greece, not germany.

3) It took about 30 years and the effects of post-war liberalization to get Germany anywhere near an acceptable industrial base. And there were still bombed-out areas, shitty roads, bad services, limited resources and underdeveloped regions.

4) US-based investors, meanwhile just could go on buying up everything, investing and expanding into Europe, and generally transforming most of the world into a dollar-dominated backwater. Of course the economic havoc of wartime and the subsequent "small wars" (not to mention the economic havoc of the preceding "New Deal") must have loped off a few hundred billion gold-based USD of lost revenue but hey, who is counting?

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Boffins baffled by the glowing 'plumes' of MARS

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Alien

Re: Slightly baffled by aurora comments

Correct...

The plumes could be some sort of very unusual aurora, 1,000 times brighter than anything seen on Earth, triggered by a very strong magnetic pocket in the planet’s crust that drove solar wind particles out into the atmosphere.

... MARS MAGNETIC ANOMALY #1?

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Your hard drives were RIDDLED with NSA SPYWARE for YEARS

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Re: Grzegorz Brzeczyszczykiewicz

The feel when SNOWCRASH!

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Channel on track: British tech insolvencies fall to seven-year low

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I have numbers and they may mean this or that!

Bloomberg from last year:

Japanese corporate bankruptcies fell in 2014 to the lowest level since the final year of Japan’s asset bubble, as a government request for banks to alter loan conditions for smaller firms helped companies stay afloat, Bloomberb News reported. Business failures slid 10.4 percent in 2014 from a year earlier to 9,731 cases, the fewest since 1990, Tokyo Shoko Research Ltd. said in Tokyo today. There were no bankruptcies among listed firms last year for the first time in 24 years.

Japan's economy is shot to hell and moving south as we speak.

I'm just saying...

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Hackers fear arms control pact makes exporting flaws illegal

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Re: Intention of the agreement

Politicians' buttocks?

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Re: I wore a T-shirt similar to this one on several trips (10? 12?) ...

"Justice" in the US is always hilarious.

Best in the world right behind Russia. At least our slavic friends don't brag about it.

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Re: Might be worse

Hagbard Celine apparently was owed money for carding services and a suicide occurred.

"The shit is out there"

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Re: Export licence

Remember all those stories about hacking and security tools being exported to [choose your repressive Middle East state here] who then used them to repress 'rebellious' citizens? The government will want to keep this sort of thing under control...

You are mistaken. These were security tools duly licensed and exported under full cognizance of said government, and fuck the people ending up in torture chambers. "Keep it under control" they would. To tax the sale.

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Boffins grasp Big Knob, get ready to go ALL THE WAY at the LHC proton-punisher

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Pint

The Supersymmetry Bet: A bottle of Cognac can be won.

This is an extension of the bet of 2000, whereby no Supersymmetric particles were discovered during the first LHC run but people just moaned "we haven't tried enough ENERGY yet", so ... replay!

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Re: Re. Crash!

I think this kind of faciness is now at bog paper stage; these "compact extra dimensions" need to be not-too-compact for this to work and there is scantno evidence of anything like that.

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Re: Question

I hope you can catch the flavor of the question.

Yesh. Stop dropping mescaline and see a doctor in the morning.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: What's the Fucking Point?

As Number 2 once said:

"Information. We want information."

One of the main goals in life is to find out WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON. This is that.

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Hacker catches Apple's Lightning in a jailbroken bottle

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Paris Hilton

Re: I wonder why Apple customers don't sue for such things

Most people only care about looking cool on the bus while being totally retarded inside playing casino crap or browsing myfacebook. They might even check the stock ticker for added stupidity.

"Debugging" == "Get out of my face geek".

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Google founders to offload $4 BEEELLION in shares

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Facepalm

Don't panic, dear readers, at the prospect of Google's share price (and the balance of your pension fund) diving

Woah, that Brooklyn Bridge must be going chaep right now! Guess what, all that free money from QE making the stock market casino a bit crazy has its effects:

How To Find The Next Bear Market—–Look Around!

Let me start by saying the level of opulence in Silicon Valley has far exceeded what was present in the Bay Area 15 years ago. The developers with the $350 ripped jeans and $125 flip-flops have been around for years, but this is different.

and

Stock Market Alert: I’m Not Trying To Scare You—– I’m Trying To Warn You

The reason I seem so bearish today is that I feel the current risk/reward equation in the stock market presents investors with all risk, no reward. Valuations, across a variety of metrics, suggest stocks are roughly 80% above their long-term average.

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Hackers break the bank to the tune of $300 MEEELLION

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Paris Hilton

"fleeced $7.3 million through ATM withdrawals"

Seriously, HOW?

Even with $1000 per day, that's still 7300 days standing at the ATM.

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Online retail giant Amazon GOES TITSUP ACROSS EUROPE

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Mushroom

When @AmazonUK goes down it makes the fire phone a brick, open any app and it tells you the phone not registered! Shocking!

Stay away from this central control shit.

Looking at the intermittently up home page, they went over it and besterified it yet again. Judging from the retarded ULTRA-LARGE/ULTRA-WIDE picture format newly employed that is currently de rigueur with every web designer priding him/herself on being irredeemably autistic and subscribed to all the premier webby lifestyle magazines, it suits them just right.

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ATTENTION SETI scientists! It's TOO LATE: ALIENS will ATTACK in 2049

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Re: More likely

But we only captured the Wow signal's noise in some frequency bins, no actual signal.

It could have been anything. Even Doc Brown trying new stuff in the institute next door.

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Facepalm

Re: What about the 1974 Arecibo message?

"But we already got a response to the Arecibo message!"

The Chilbolton face and the famous face on Mars (Below). Notice the resemblance?

Not sure whether trolling or just "I Want To Believe" deluded.

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Holmes

Re: Solution to this threat

The Liberation of Earth

Getting that Iraqi feel.

This, then, is the story of our liberation. Suck air and grab clusters. Heigh-ho, here is the tale.

August was the month, a Tuesday in August. These words are meaningless now, so far have we progressed; but many things known and discussed by our primitive ancestors, our unliberated, unreconstructed forefathers, are devoid of sense to our free minds. Still the tale must be told, with all of its incredible place-names and vanished points of reference.

Why must it be told? Have any of you a better thing to do? We have had water and weeds and lie in a valley of gusts, So rest, relax and listen. And suck air, suck air.

On a Tuesday in August, the ship appeared in the sky over France in a part of the world then known as Europe. Five miles long the ship was, and word has come down to us that it looked like an enormous silver cigar.

The tale goes on to tell of the panic and consternation among our forefathers when the ship abruptly materialized in the summer-blue sky. How they ran, how they shouted, how they pointed!

How they excitedly notified the United Nations, one of their chiefest institutions, that a strange metal craft of incredible size had materialized over their land. How they sent an order here to cause military aircraft to surround it with loaded weapons, gave instructions there for hastily grouped scientists, with signaling apparatus, to approach it with friendly gestures. How, under the great ship, men with cameras took pictures of it; men with typewriters wrote stories about it; and men with concessions sold models of it.

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Re: You guys are just too positive...

WOWSERS

Any civilization that stars building its economy on WOWSERS will not be a factor in the long run.

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Big Brother

Re: Why is the assumption that whatever is out there is hostile

Because of two simple facts

I applaud this to-the-point analysis!

This is entirely supported by bretty-low-IQ "economists" blogging in the "New X'ran Times". We need a war now! Think of the children.

And being hawkish interstellar sure is going to bring in the votes and fatten the MIC. We are all Space Nazis now!

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Devil

Re: 2008: MySpace Odyssey

the inhabitants of Gisele 581

I can tell, the inhabitants of Gisele 581 are fierce. My doc gave me a lesson about STDs and I had to take antibiotics for two weeks.

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Gimp

Re: Death by Alien Cockup ...

and turn Earth's biota into green goo in a matter of weeks

These would still be complex organisms and would probably have Achilles Heels as high as Twin Towers.

For example, "And don't forget: Hydrate every day, eat a banana and take an extra dose of Vitamin Cglide gel - a combination utterly toxic to all martian life forms! This message brought to you by Weyland-Yutani - Building Better Worlds, Today!"

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Re: Nah, we're safe

I'll leave it as an exercise for the reader to decide if that includes El Reg.

Seeing that they show us an illustration of a solar system where a red sun makes a planet reflect white light, I would say it absolutely does!

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Interstellar sci-fi WORMS its way into spinning black hole science FACT

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Paris Hilton

"It's ray tracing, Jim. But not as we know it!"

So, if one actually had a blackhole obscuring the starfield a few AUs away, one could easily deduce its spin by just looking for the whirled-up caustics?

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BLAME ENGINEERS: Workstation sales soar by 8.9 per cent a year

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Happy

Re: What is a workstation indeed?

Workstation == The machine that you want you run a program on which:

1) the cheap PCs in the lab room are simply unable to run (plus, those are "Windows", unserious at best)

2) the Gods of the Sun Mainframe In the Basement decided you won't run: "Have your department head submit a request, LOL! X terminal access? No bandwidth for that, sorry."

The state of play has very much changed since then, so that term makes only sense to oldsters who want to keep young people off their lawn.

Today, get a cheap terminal and allocate CPUs in the cloud,

....until your personal AI needs a big machine right in your physical neighborhood.

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AMD stops shipping chips as bloated channel begs 'Please, no more'

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Re: They would do well to raise their profile.

DEFLATION!

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Think you’re hard? Check out the frozen Panasonic CF-54 Toughbook

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Ok, so..

1) Does it have ECC RAM?

2) Can I get it with an Akademi logo?

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Headmaster

Re: Ouch

keeping nearly a grand saved up in the bank would seem to be preferable

Not sure in what kind of fiat currency that kind of 1870-ish statement is still true.

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