* Posts by Destroy All Monsters

11258 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

BOFFINS: Oxygen-free, methane-based ALIENS may EXIST on icy SATURN moon Titan

Destroy All Monsters
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No, hard-earned taxpayer dollars are being expended to fund the homeland security which just issued "OMG! Thermite on Planes! It's UNDETECTABLE" surpriso-research.

Problem?

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: bad units

but 292 degrees below zero is just wrong when used in any technical field

You better chill out...

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I, ROBOT ~ YOU, MORON. How else will automated news work?

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Trollface

A robot named Marvin

More like a passive-agressive version of R2D2.

BLEEP BLOOP F*CKETY F*CK!

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He's baaack: Microsoft's axeman Nadella to give Chinese staff the chop

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Paris Hilton

Linebacker III

Presumably president Obama, using drones?

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El Reg regains atomic keyring capability

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Paris Hilton

Re: Originals still going strong

Why would Iran try to obtain tritium by dogdy means when they can very easily get a container of it (or even produce it themselves) by placing a phone call, being NPT signatories and all that?

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NERDGASM as Apple announces 'special event'

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It is about a small jade figurine, curiously fashioned into a winged creature with a kraken head, and a bit squamous, yet ruguous to the touch.

Soon to be mass-produced.

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Paranoid Android Kaymera smartmobe takes on Blackphone

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Headmaster

> Israeli

> Mobile security platform

More like, now comes with Komodo/Superfish and special Hezbollah detector.

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Net neutrality secrecy: No one knows what the FCC approved (BUT Google has a good idea)

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Democratic process is heavily democratic

Secret decisions about unspecified objectives to assert control? Obama administration standard operating procedure.

Well, there will be leaks soon.

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Say cheese! Europe's antitrust chief has Google boss in her sights – reports

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Paris Hilton

Random application of guns & badges to fix problems we think might possibly exist

I think there is some kind of problem these people are supposed to solve here? Can anyone recall what the problem is?

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Lenovo CTO: Hey, look around – we're not the only ones with a crapware infection

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"pave over paradise and put up a parking lot"

...then install Jack in the Box at the corner, just next to the illegal dumping ground.

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Zeus scumbag infects itself, buddies, with rival Trojan

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Re: talk about awkward

It will just be another plastic bag leaving the premises.

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Trollface

MUAH!

It is amazing this kind of RNA exchange happens on systems several orders of magnitude simpler than actual biological systems.

Bodes well for the time when people will be able to buy genetic sequencers at Wal-Mart, promoted by (whatever will be the future version of) George Clooney.

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Amazon tries to patent 3D printers on trucks

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Trollface

Hitler patents execution commandos on trucks!

PATENT WAR with STALIN: Use of concentration camps deemed covered by "prior art".

Japanes file amicus curiae brief, also claims impromptu beheadings by katana are a national first.

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Mozilla mulls Superfish torpedo

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Re: Deeper problem

Comodo provides trusted root for quite a few fish lower down the certificate chain, so there are Comodo certs in the standard "trusted root CA" packages.

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Wanna free web domain for a year? Hey, it's not rocket .science

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Potato

Get aperture.science then install a portal on it!

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AMD's new Carrizo: The x86 notebook processor that thinks it's a GPU

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Re: Interesting

All fabbed in Taiwan!

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For pity's sake, you FOOL! DON'T UPGRADE it will make it WORSE

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Holmes

Re: Decaff soya latte

These things are full of computers nowadays.

But there sure is a difference between "consumer-tier data processing clobbered together by 'engineers'" and "stuff properly developed by actual engineers".

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Destroy All Monsters
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"US International"?

US International keyboard layout

My exceptionalism!!

I think even white house spokespersons (currently blondemonster Pzaki, I think) will affirm these do not, and never did, exist and any rumor to the contrary are terrorist inventions.

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Excellent recounting, Mr. Dabbs

I think you might be interested into our new Scientofuntologic ReEmpowerator™ ISO9706 Agile© Prince2© TMMi PMI Capability CMMi Institute of the Insane Methodology, which will guarantee 100% success in all endeavors regarding upgrade proceduralics in spite of your team having no idea whatsoever about IT having been recycled from moribund industries℠. Success guaranteed. For a slight fee, you understand.

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Blackhat: Michael Mann brings an informed cybercrime yarn to the silver screen

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Re: So, the Mann is back

Plus the soundtracks are generally excellent.

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Something Coming Through – aliens, LA noir, techno-thriller, dystopia ALL in the mix

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Holmes

The next Alastair Reynolds?

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So long, Lenovo, and no thanks for all the super-creepy Superfish

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Paris Hilton

Re: $shitlist += "Lenovo"

You will find that you should have written

push($shitlist,"Lenovo");

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

Re: Cue the ClassAction lawsuits in 3... 2... 1...

Stop protecting McDonalds.

I you can't handle the heat, don't drink coffee at McDonald's.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Headmaster

Re: What is it with advertisers?

if it did, there'd be nothing on the shelves and we'd all have six cars

The goal of advertising is not to increase the available wealth of the target, but but have him allocate wealth differently than it would have been done otherwise.

And seeing how people are in debt up to their eyesockets while still having three cars....

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Paris Hilton

Re: Cue the ClassAction lawsuits in 3... 2... 1...

The Woman with the McDonald's coffee had third degree burns on her thighs and genitals

McDonalds now serves lava? Probably not in polystyrene cups.

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TrueCrypt + Norton AV = BSOD, wail disgruntled users

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Trollface

Re: OEM encryption

many laptops already have a built in encryption (full disk, part or choice partition)

Wrong, but seeing the levels of QUALITY, CARE and SKILLS-EXHIBITED of BIOS code in general, would you ever trust industrial waste of that kind?

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The Extreme Centre, Rise of the Super Furry Animals and The Kind Worth Killing

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Facepalm

Socialism: it's fun, try it!

“In memoriam: Hugo Chavez, the first leader of a movement that defeated the extreme centre”

Woah. The guy the who managed to actually wreck Venezuela's economy so much that it turned from a major coffee exporter to a rounding error on the exporters' charts and even toilet paper became an item of rarity? Yep, it's not the Yankee's fault. It's believing in your Marxian power of economic übercontrol.

I think we can skip this book.

“refuse to step down and talk to the people whose worlds they have destroyed.”

Is that so.

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Man the HARPOONS: YOU can EASILY SLAY ad-scumware Superfish

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Coat

Re: Ain't that a kick in the head

Any worst than by the NSA or any other foreign gov agency?

Actually I do think the ones wearing chutzpahs are indeed worse.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

CEO Addy Piranhas regrets ...

CEO Adi Pinhas told El Reg ... "Fortunately, our partnership with Lenovo was limited in scale..."

That's the first time I have heard "fortunately" combined with "limited in scale" from a provider of "PUPware".

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Hellooo, NSA? The US State Department can't kick hackers out of its networks – report

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Paris Hilton

I never thought it would come to wanting Reagan back, but here we are.

Messages regarding US policy on the Ukraine, and other files, have been swiped from the system, two sources report.

There is a policy different from getting the current retardation of Ukrainians killed and ignoring Nazis in order to get Chevron some fracking rights and cause grief for Putin in order to realize the liberal/neocon pussy-wetting dream of "regime change" in Russia? I think we should be told.

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HAWKING ALERT: Leave planet Earth, find a new home. Stupid humans

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Holmes

Re: It's never going to happen

a level of human greed* that's never been seen before which will destroy us all** fairly shortly

Not all all.

We have just reaching a level of moneyprinting that is historically unprecendented (i.e. creation of the illusion of wealth, which apparently can be allocated by the powers that be to preferred actors at the push of a return key).

The current expectations regarding payout by governments and ROIs from investments just cannot be fulfilled. There is not enough actual wealth. And the current debt mountain must be ablated by few 10s of percents (the 2008 crash eliminated 5% or so I think). This will cause gnashing of teeth not far from a limited nuclear exchange, but that's the way the cookie crumbles when you believe the easy, smooth lies of Keynesians and Krugmanites.

Once we have gone through the hardship that looms in the immediate future and honest accounting is back en vogue, we will talk about space faring again.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Re: Clever chap!

Please find any useful way to get "off the planet" while leaving the bioshpere at home.

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Dutch MEP slams 'cowboy practices' of GCHQ 'n' pals following Gemalto allegations

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Paris Hilton

Re: The "Law of the Jungle".....is still the only law

Relevance?

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Destroy All Monsters
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But what, exactly, could they have done?

I know... BOMB LYBIA!! DRONE YEMEN!!! Hell yeah.

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BLOOD STAR of the NEANDERTHALS passed close to our Sun

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Re: Timely...

The Star

"Pretty women, flushed and glittering, heard the news told jestingly between the dances, and feigned an intelligent interest they did not feel. “Nearer! Indeed. How curious! How very, very clever people must be to find out things like that!”

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El Reg chefs whip up Post-Pub Noshographic

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Re: The most astonishing thing about this series is ...

No, but we are IT.

> keep yourselves healthy.

Overrated.

Also: Pork dose a day keeps the ISIS away.

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Hello Barbie: Hang on, this Wi-Fi doll records your child's voice?

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Re: Obligatory Harry Harrison reference...

This rather makes me feel like the world is entering a Philip K. Dick universe. But which one?

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Tim Cook slurped our brains, snarl fat battery bods A123

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Holmes

Re: Serfdom?

This is the secret sauce that makes your product more competitive than anyone elses.

Here is a free-market idea: If that idea is so valuable, then the NDA should be accompanied with a payout to keep the engineer's mouth sealed (may have to be done through a bank account to be liberated in 10y time). Not with a threat to sue. Might work better.

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Did NSA, GCHQ steal the secret key in YOUR phone SIM? It's LIKELY

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Gimp

[T]he UK's interception regime is entirely compatible with the European Convention on Human Rights.

Entirely compatible? So there is a SOAP interface.

It's currently between your feet and your arse is against the wall.

What do?

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Have YOU got Equation NSAware in your drives? Meh, not really our concern, says EU

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Facepalm

Re: add 1000% TAX on all hardware and software from US (and UK) companies

> Basically boot start a EU wide tech sector.

Not sure whether serious or totally retarded.

Have fun getting rid of all cross-licensing schemes and generally getting the EU tech sector anywhere other than navel-gazing and taxed/regulated/mismanaged to the general shape of a quivering puppy.

There is a good reason why Europe is an economic shithole getting shittier by the day.

The US is still the powerhouse, in spite of all its governments attempt at raping it into a socialistic shape amenable to the liberal lunatic fringe.

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> Sometimes the government - or their contractors - have to do some real nasty stuff

Nazi bullshit

> living with your "rights and freedoms"

Scare quotes. Thanks for clarifying.

> This is not new as it was first demonstrated at OHM 2013

This is not new as demonstrated by Reinhard Heydrich c.a. 1942.

Get Rekt M8!

The finger in the icon is not the correct one.

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Superfish: Lenovo ditches adware, but that doesn't fix SSL megavuln – researcher

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Re: SSL Certificate now public

IT IS THE SAME ONE IN ALL CASES??

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Sadly, it has come to the point where no shot is too cheap and no hyperbole is left unrealized anymore.

"Ah, Mr Creosote. Can I offer you a large, wide-screen image in the middle of your preferred website, sir?"

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Destroy All Monsters
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Windows

Well....

> Prospecting for a new laptop

> Dell has only no-longer-composable "take it or leave it and better lube up" crud on display

> Visit Lenovo's website instead

> Need to tell NoScript to "enable temporarily" websites I have never heard of

> Ghostery pops a vein growing a World Trade Center in the corner

> Nope.jpg

Still have no new laptop. Am I a failure?

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UK public sector biz keeps French giant Atos buoyant

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An no increase in GDP occurred

THANK YOU UK TAXPAYER!

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Inside GOV.UK: 'CHAOS' and 'NIGHTMARE' as trendy Cabinet Office wrecked govt websites

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Re: "trendily-designed webpages bereft of useful information"

LOLNO.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

Re: Agree--new BBC is a heart-sinker

It's saddening when Al Jazeera actually provides more and indepth coverage of actual news

I don't see how that is saddening. It has also been the case since the Bush II Iraqi pratfall now.

If the US goes to the the length to find the exact hotel room through which a tank projectile shall be "accidentally" lobbed or bothers to blow a marked journalist team off a Baghdad roof by JDAM they must be doing something right.

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Re: Symptom of a much deeper problem.

+1 for The Truth

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HTTP/2 spec gets green light: Faster web or needless complexity?

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Holmes

Re: Complexity leads to bugs which lead to security problems

We live in an age where our computers rival living beings in complexity.

Not really.

It's not like protocol handlers cannot be written with the proof they have been implemented according to specification (of course the spec may be wrong, but that's the way it goes). Protocols are never really complex in any meaningful sense.

It's people faffing around with C and handwritten manglers like medieval hunchbacked differently-abled persons who are the real problem.

Coding in Mercury? Hell yeah.

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Destroy All Monsters
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Holmes

The Nietzschean eternal rebirth

That would in deed be a very sensible thing to do, as it would also create a boundary between authentication, session handling and the rest of the application. Plus you could do amazing stuff with a minimal amount of code, and since "remote frame buffer" is a fairly well defined set of requirements, we could even support multiple protocols rather easily.

Will "X Terminals" be back? Yes. Yes, they will. Already, we have "remote desktops in the cloud".

We should have stayed with the NeWS of the early 90s. Imagine all that JavaScript horror which could have been avoided (we are now at the maximum entropy NodeJS stage of course, which sounds like someone is implementing a real-world Monty Python sketch for confused people just out of uni, but so be it!)

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