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* Posts by Linbox

121 posts • joined 3 Jun 2008

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Microsoft SQL Server 14 man: 'Nothing stops a Hekaton transaction'

Linbox
WTF?

SQL 14 ??!!

We're only up to version 11.0 at the moment, with the next one presumably being v11.5?

Did you miss '20' off the front of that version number, or have I fallen asleep in SQL Management Studio and woken up in 2024?

(please god, tell the muppets not to call it SQL 2012R2).

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Linbox

Re: I don't get it. How is this different to the PIN functionality from SS7

The "native code" stored procedures is very definitely new and pretty significant.

After they introduced the (IMHO) disastrous CLR fuck-up-waiting-to-happen, which allowed any owner of "VB for Dummies" to write dogshit procedures, actually going back, admitting CLR is crap and putting the effort into getting T-SQL procedures to compile down to native code is the best news I've heard in weeks. (I'll be heartbroken if this is another "Enterprise-Only" feature. I'm still boo-hoo-ing about Column Store Indexes).

Your mileage may vary.

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Linbox
FAIL

Re: World+Dog gasps at the innovation

Think you might have missed the point of this website. For SQL Server bods, these two things are pretty significant and whilst a fairly specialised subject - that's exactly why I read El.Reg instead of The Daily Mail.

I'm off to post "wow! Amaze-balls" on that article I didn't understand about deep-pipe-L3-caching processors (or whatever) ...

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3 Brits banged up for £300k VAT scam

Linbox
FAIL

Re: We're all in it together

FFS. All these companies are paying tax according to the law. Nothing more, nothing less.

Same as me. Same as you. Unless you routinely volunteer to pay extra tax you don't owe? No? Thought not.

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Swedish boffins: An ICE AGE is coming, only CO2 can save us

Linbox
FAIL

Graph proves article accuracy

Unless I misread your graph, it appears to show that temperature over the last 15 years to have been flat or declining - exactly as the article stated. It does also show that over 40 years, it has increased by 0.5 degrees. The two facts are not mutually exclusive.

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Wireless Power breakthrough: Iron Man can lose the chest reactor

Linbox
Coat

"Ada Poon"

I had to stop reading after getting to the name.

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Brummie plod cuffed in Facebook troll hunt

Linbox

Re: The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

"I'm upvoting the idea of you doing it".

Lovely. in the spirit of internet lolz, I'll treat your "incitement to suicide" (almost certainly a criminal offence) with the disregard it deserves.

You know when you read those once-a-year stories about how a neighbourly dispute about a hedge somehow spiralled out of control over a period of months/years and it ends up with somebody getting stabbed in the neck with a BBQ fork? You wonder, "how the fuck did that happen?". Well, as sure as shit sticks to blankets, that's what happened here. Much of the response to my OP misses the point that the hedge dispute could have been resolved by EITHER party letting it go. In that scenario, I'm not suggesting murder is absolutely fine. I'm not saying I'd be happy for you to come around my manor and stab Mrs. Linbox with a rusty butter knife.

I'm simply saying that while the end-game was deplorable and it's quite right that the perpetrators should be punished, the lady in question almost certainly had plenty of opportunity to leave this alone long before it turned critical. She didn't. Things went from bad to worse. Police, courts, jury, prisons, people losing jobs, bitter recriminations, angst and trouble. Nobody has really won anything or come out of it in a flattering light.

All for the sake of ignoring a fuckwad on the internet.

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Linbox

Re: The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

Does ANYBODY think that the progression in this case was;

1. Innocent lady posts fluffy nonsense about a talent show.

2. Multiple Internet bullies take raging offence to teh fluff, hack her computer, post unlawful lies about her and try to ruin her life.

And that's it? Nothing between (1) and (2)?

Really?

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Linbox

Re: Wrists

Bullying = I agree.

Nasty things on facebook = see my previous response.

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Linbox

Re: The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

If I was a public figure, then the "shit sticks" argument would be valid.

As a private individual, I know how to get in contact with all the people who actually matter to me and know they'd either assume I was being trolled or would contact me direct to see what was happening. Maybe I'm just lucky that all my friends and colleagues aren't total fuckwits who would believe any old shit somebody wrote about me - even if it was supposedly me writing about it. Because NOBODY on facebook has heard of "fraping", right?

Prior to this prosecution, a couple of people (at most) might have looked askance at her. Not me, and not you because we'd never heard of her. Now, after her great legal success, several thousand people think she's brave standing up to bullies and several more thousand think she's a fucking idiot. Not seeing what she's won - apart from a total lack of anonymity.

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Linbox

Re: The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

/bandages wrists/

Deeply hurt you implied I'm a dick.

/downs paracetamol & vodka while climbing into a hot bath/

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Linbox

Re: The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

Deeply hurt you called me a dick.

/slashes wrists/

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Linbox
FAIL

The Somebody Said Something Unpleasant To Me Act 2012.

Don't remember this one passing parliament ....

Ms Brookes needs to harden the fuck up. - (home address available on request).

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Watchdog probes rules for naughty mobe fondling on flights

Linbox
Stop

More worried about the 'tards drive-by-texting.

Just got back from NYC and I swear every second car was being driven by a bozo on their phone. What could be THAT important that you want to drive 2-ton of steel at 70mph while not looking?

Interesting stats for you;

US deaths on commercial flights 2011 : nil

US deaths on commercial flights 2010 : nil

US road deaths in 2011 : 33,808

Number killed in 9/11 : 2,996

It's not the guy in seat 12F you have to worry about, it's the dick driving the Buick...

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Raspberry Pi sales limits lifted

Linbox
FAIL

Parcelforce = wankers

I was out when they attempted delivery. I re-arranged for a second attempt on Friday, waited in all day and when it didn't turn up, checked the PF website and they'd inexplicably returned it to RS instead ... Tried ringing RS but "customer services" doesn't cover Pi orders ...

*sigh*

It'd better be worth it...

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Microsoft's uncloaks Phone 8 developer preview

Linbox
WTF?

"Phone 7 users won't be able to upgrade to Windows 8"

If that is true, then this is an epic fail.

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Council chief overrules blackout on Scots 9-yr-old's school lunch blog!

Linbox
Headmaster

Salaries

In a smaller primary school of 100 kids, let's assume 60% take school dinners and the rest packed lunches. Out of the £120 income, you'll have to pay 2 cooks for 6-hours work (3 prep, 1.5 service, 1.5 cleanup), at minimum wage (£6.08) = £72.96. Plus let's assume 3 lunchtime 'supervisors', for 90 mins each = £27.36 gives a total salary cost of £100.32. Leaving exactly 33p per meal for ingredients. For that much money - you get radish and macaroni 'surprise'...

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Apple's Siri nominates Nokia as best phone maker

Linbox
Stop

If you ask for best "mobile phone"...

siri says "you're kidding, right?". As above - it says "I think you've answered that question".

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Singapore most 'liveable' Asian city for ex-pat IT pros

Linbox
Stop

FILTH

Failed In London? Try HongKong.

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Microsoft's magic bullet for Azure: Red Hat Linux

Linbox
FAIL

I've worked on and around ERP systems for 25 years.

Working for multi-nationals and large corporates as well as SME's and even some fairly small businesses on three continents. Both as a contractor, an employee and in-house as well as for vendors (including at least one big named one).

Shit load of Unix, Pick and OS/400 based systems. Boatloads of Windoze.

Not a single Linux ERP system.

Niche, you say?

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Linbox
FAIL

"all relevant ERP already on Linux" ?!?

Oh yes, all the relevant ERP systems, with the exception of things like all versions of Sage, Navision, Great Plains, EX, Pegasus, SunAccounts, most/all Infor products and about another 50 I could probably name if I had the time.

So other than 95% of all companies, with the exception of multi-national corporates with more money than sense running SAP, it is true to say "all relevant ERP systems are on Linux" ....

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Linbox
Holmes

As one of those 10,000 customers...

I can tell you that my monthly bill is £7.32. How the hell they came up with that number is anybodies guess.

As others have already pointed out, adapting existing stuff to run on Azure is a whole heap more difficult than just stuffing it onto an AWS server.

Which explains why my Azure bill is £7.32 and my Amazon one about £400 ...

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iPad Fleshlight lets fanbois express their love

Linbox
Thumb Up

my thoughts *exactly*

<click>

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Microsoft raises 'state of the art' son of NTFS

Linbox
Happy

"micros~1"

Brilliant! You owe me a new keyboard.

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MPs: This plan for proper navy carriers and jets is crazy!

Linbox
FAIL

Was all good until you got the name wrong.

F/A-18.

No such beast as an F-18. Never has been. Never will be.

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Voda in 3G blackhole probe by ASA

Linbox
FAIL

Most of Hampshire

It's OK though, because it's only the 5th most populated county in the country, so why on earth would they try to get reasonable 3G coverage? I don't get reliable 2G coverage in either my house or office and the car journey through NE Hampshire is a patchy quilt of coverage of any sort.

Sure Signal? Don't make me giraffe. Got one at home and office and they're just about averagely useful unless you're doing any heavy lifting on the broadband, in which case you might as well use semaphore flags...

Shitest. Network. Ever.

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Linbox

Spot on

The post is required, and must contain letters.

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Hundreds of Brit pubs to offer free WiFi

Linbox
FAIL

Title? we don't need no stinking title.

third para of wikipedia article on Adelaide; "Named in honour of Queen Adelaide, the German-born consort of King William IV, the city was ....".

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Microsoft previews 'Juneau' SQL Server tools

Linbox
FAIL

OPENROWSET

New name for old functionality.

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Parmo v poutine: The ultimate post-pub nosh deathmatch

Linbox
Stop

"mystery meat"

Christ on a bike, I'd forgotten about that Amstel-fueled Kroket fest until just now.

I feel sick all over again.

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Councils and police to publish speed camera data

Linbox

Time, sex, age

I'd love to see the stats from the local camera sites that included the time of the offence as well as the sex and age of the speeder and then correlate that to the historic KSI stats. Although purely anecdotal, Hampshire mobile cameras seem to mostly fine middle-aged school-mums between 10:00am and 3:00pm on weekdays and 9-12am during Sunday's football run. Equally anecdotally, all the fatalities around these parts seem to involve young adult males between the hours of midnight and 2am...

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Brit expats aghast as Denmark bans Marmite

Linbox
FAIL

... lifetime ...

Not year. That's the joke, right there in the one word you messed up.

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Midnight theft left Vodafone users bereft

Linbox
WTF?

SureSignal?

Not sure how their network joins together and it might be a red herring, but I'm about 12 miles from Basingstoke and have enjoyed 5-bars uninterrupted service all day both home and at work. All of my colleagues are offline. The only difference is - I have a Voda SureSignal box at home & work?

Coincidence?

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Fujitsu relieves Ballmer's iPad pressure

Linbox
FAIL

Own programs = minority interest

I doubt 1 in 1000 people use their "own" programs on a computer these days. The number of self-written programs I run on all of my home computers is NIL - and I write software for a living...

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Mozilla ices Firefox 4 beta 12 release to nail final bugs

Linbox
FAIL

VbV blows chunks

I can't be bothered to remember YET ANOTHER password on the damn thing, so I change it each and every time I use it. Normally to something like "ThisIsAWasteOfTime1" (you have to use at least one digit).

Never really understood the point of it.

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God-game creator granted Bafta gong

Linbox
Go

Nice guy. Don't mention the shoelaces...

I met him a few times during his Bullfrog days as I worked with his sister, Jane.

He always wore shoes with the laces undone and when I mentioned this, I was told that he loved wearing lace-up shoes, but had never learned to tie them...

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Cobol cabal will take over THE WORLD Australia

Linbox
Stop

Alive and as well as could be expected

I think the chaps at Embarcadero would be surprised to learn of it's death.

I've coded Delphi since D2 and am currently employed on a nice salary, travelling the world (3-weeks in Oz coming up next month) looking after a legacy product written in "dead" Delphi. Amusingly enough, the bright young things have been trying for 2-years to build the same application in C# and are perplexed that their code is x20 slower than "dead" pascal.

Tools are tools. Just use the one that best fits the job in hand.

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The Girl with the NSObject Class Reference tattoo

Linbox
Go

VERY obscure

Have a click for cleverness.

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In-flight fight for stubborn iPhone-loving teen

Linbox
Stop

Ageism at work

I wonder if the victim would have been so reviled if they were a 25-year old girl instead of a 15-year old boy?

There is something wrong with a country that so hates it's youth.

Happy new year.

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Man arrested in Phones4U mansion raid

Linbox
Stop

<insert obligatory anti-scouse joke here>

playing up to stereotypes.

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PARIS nursing mother of all hangovers

Linbox
FAIL

Erm .... guys?

Not sure who lives in that nice looking house with a huge front garden on Dartmouth Road, Broadsands, near Paignton in Devon, but they should maybe think of turning the GPS tracker off...

http://aprs.fi/?call=G6UIM-9&mt=roadmap&z=10&timerange=3600

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Visa looks at NYC wave-pay trial, says 'I wanna be a part of it'

Linbox
Go

NYC Subway fares

It's currently $2.25 per journey and set to rise. Pre-paid cards over $8 get a 15% bonus, bringing the cost per journey down to $1.95.

It should be remembered that it's not a simple pay once, unlimited travel system - if you go on a longer journey that requires a change of line (think: hoping from Northern to Piccadilly lines), you mostly have to leave one subway and then enter another, paying again for the second trip.

You can also get 1,7,14 and 30 day unlimited travel cards which work out at as little as $2.97 per DAY, regardless of journeys and switches (the cards also work on local buses).

Oh. And then there's the PATH. That's only $1.75 per ride, with all the 15% discount on Metrocards over $8.

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London hospital hosted grumble flick shoot

Linbox
FAIL

Green Wing

C4 comedy starring Tamsin Greig and those funny chaps from the Visa ads (Stephen Mangan and Julian Rhind-Tutt) had many scenes recorded in and around Basingstoke General Hospital, Hampshire.

Don't remember there being any questions asked in "the mother of parliaments" about it...

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Redback spiders provoke BAE lock-down

Linbox

.... and relax ....

The total number of deaths caused in Australia by spider bites since 1979 is a staggering ZERO. Nil. Nada. Bugger all.

The biggest cause of death from spiders is, apparently, crashing the car you're driving when you see one dangling from the sun visor.

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Microsoft pulls plug on search bribery machine

Linbox
Stop

wait! .... Microsoft have a search engine?

who knew?

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ID cards poster girl laments her £30

Linbox
FAIL

small claims = another £30 down the shitter

The £30 county court fee for filing a small claims under £300 will be wasted for two VERY simple reasons;

1) The court is the LAST resort, having tried negotiation to resolve the dispute.

2) Crown immunity.

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Microsoft's SQL Server 2008 R2 aims high (and low)

Linbox
Go

SQL Express limits

The most important thing for me is that they've raised the maximum database size in the free version (sql express) from 4Gb to 10Gb.

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Apple leaves profits on table for 'huge' iPad future

Linbox
FAIL

Dividends v Share Price

This isn't that unusual for shares that are sharply increasing in value.

If you had bought a single Apple share on 1-Apr-2009 for $104 and they had issued a dividend of 3c/$, you would have received a share of profits totalling $3.02. Alternatively, you could have sold the shares one year later on 1-Apr-2010 for $237, netting a return in excess of $133. Which would you rather?

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Blighty's first home grown war robot takes to Welsh skies!

Linbox
FAIL

^ this ^

I was going to post almost exactly the same thing. It's not quite a 100% recovery because some of that money will be exported as profits by the operating companies and some will be spent by the employees on imported goods and services, but I would guess the actual money 'lost' by the government would be less then £10 per £100, making these drones a snip at only £1.7m each.

Lewis : I mostly love your work, but ignoring the monetary facts on these kinds of projects is starting to take the gloss off. It's simple economics. Ask Tim Worstall at El Reg's economics desk - he'll set you straight.

(Disclosure : Never worked in global warbiz, don't know anybody that does).

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Man coughs to sex with donkey and horse

Linbox
Stop

Discovery

I'm not 100% sure, but I always understood that most statute of limitations impose a time limit from when the crime could have reasonably been discovered. In a contract dispute, for example, both parties have 6-years to bring an action which they would have known about as soon as the contract was breached. In the event of bestiality, the discovery could only have occurred when he confessed to it and any time limit would have started at the point of confession.

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