Feeds

* Posts by A. Coatsworth

186 posts • joined 29 May 2008

Page:

Top Gear Tigers and Bingo Boilers: Farewell then, Phones4U

A. Coatsworth
Holmes

Re: Silver PS3 in late 2005?

I was thinking the same.

The infallible Wikipedia tells me the first silver PS3 wasn't available until October 2007, 2 years after the date this document was produced.

So, was the guide modified somewhere around 2008, or we have a funny fake in our hands?

0
0

Leak of '5 MEELLLION Gmail passwords' creates security flap

A. Coatsworth
Happy

Re: The list

Thanks, Supernintendo!

although, to be frank when I put my email into a site called "have I been pwned", I half expected the result would be: "well, you have been now, mate!"

3
0

Apple's ONE LESS THING: the iPod Classic disappears

A. Coatsworth
Gimp

for all the contempt I feel for apple as a company...

I have to compliment them on the hardware. I have a 30 gb 3rd generation iPod that has seen lots of action for the last 7 years and it's still going strong. The damn thing just won't die.

I has a lot of annoying (and frankly baffling) limitations, product of apple policies: no FM, a limited selection of compatible audio formats, a laughable selection of video formats... *iTunes*... but the mere hardware is superb.

Won't be buying any other apple products in the near future, though. The constrains they put on the users far outweigh their strengths in my opinion.

0
0

Love XKCD? Love science? You'll love a book about science from Randall Munroe

A. Coatsworth
Happy

Volume 0

Hated that book... but not for the reason you might think... the riddles and games sprinkled in the pages of that book made me feel utterly dumb, I could figure out maybe 10% of them.

So I can't (and don't want to) imagine what sort of new games he included in this new book!

Hopefully I can "hint" someone in my family to get it as Christmas present

1
0

Stand clear! Will HTC's One act as a defibrillator for Windows Phone?

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

"beautiful piece of design"?

Probably I suffer some kind of design-daltonism, because I really can't see where's the beauty here. The droves of Android phones, the iPhone, and this one all look the same to me: glass slabs with rounded corners and the same 3 boring soft buttons at the bottom... this one is brushed steel instead of black or white, so I guess that's something... but in all fairness, what makes it different from a Galaxy or iPhone?

The only ones that try to at least *look* different are some of the Lumias and Xperias (I won't comment on their merits as smartphones, I'm only talking about the looks)

6
1

Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE

A. Coatsworth
Thumb Up

Black coffee

Reading this before I start the working day, with a cup of black, simple, real Costarrican coffee at my side, I suddenly realized something: I no longer look forward for a BOfH tale as my Friday's pick-me-up... now I come directly to Alistair's column, and seldom leave disappointed (God, that phrase sounds WRONG).

In any case, thanks a lot for the laughs. They are definitely needed, as I'm still 10 hours from pub o' clock

7
0

eBay slammed for daft post-hack password swap advice

A. Coatsworth
IT Angle

About http://xkcd.com/936

A couple of people mentioned that, already famous, comic.

As I'm not in the least a security expert, I need to honestly ask: is that a good or a bad advice? At first I thought it sounded reasonable enough, but the tooltip gives a vibe of irony... so it's a good or a bad idea to apply that generation algorithm in the real world?

Thanks!

0
0

Wolfenstein: The New Order ... BLAM-BLAM! That guard did Nazi that coming

A. Coatsworth
Thumb Up

Re: "Can I play, Daddy?"

And, although it's not mentioned in the article, I'll bet the other 2 difficulty settings are "bring it on" and "I am death incarnate"

8
0

Stop bullying SUPER FAT GODZILLA, urge movie stars

A. Coatsworth
Mushroom

Re: "aren't we all?"

Point the young lad to Godzilla: Final Wars. The Hollywood imitation is explained by the characters, mocked and finally annihilated by the Real Godzilla's atomic breath, on top of Sydney's Theater of the opera.

0
0

Dell charges £16 TO INSTALL FIREFOX on PCs – Mozilla is miffed

A. Coatsworth
Coat

Re: I need to re-think my charging!

I'm sorry, but if you're installing iTunes on a Windows machine, you should pay a hefty compensation to the victim for such a heinous crime against humanity

26
1

One good thing from the Flappy Birds crapp flap: It's a handy 'tech' media rating system

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

Re: Great...

In few words, it became viral... Why? because!

It's a mediocre game, with mechanics that have been (better) implemented before and graphics ripped off from Mario. The only "unique" characteristic it had was that the difficulty level was cheap and frustrating.

That attracted "comic" video reviewers from Youtube, and the hive mind that is internet took it from there, until it leaked to real world news outlets that try to hard to look cool and hip... Exactly the same cycle followed by the QWOP game a few years ago

3
0

Ancient carving of 'first human-built holy place' = Primitive Vulture Central

A. Coatsworth
Pint

"we must consider the truly incredible avian symbolism of a vulture playing a swan in Turkey."

I came to try and write a funny comment, but after reading this gem, I realized nothing I can do will ever get near to it.

Hat's off to you, good sir!

2
0

El avión Buitre 2 rinde homenaje a nuestros amigos españoles

A. Coatsworth
Headmaster

Nazi Gramatical

The grammar Nazi in me feels the need to report the word "hechándonos". It should be "echándonos", without that pesky H at the beginning... It's a very common mistake in Spanish, but one that should be fought anyway.

Also, at the end of the article, it should read " si OS atrevéis a usar el Google Translate". Pronouns can be tricky sometimes.

Yes, I know I could have just clicked the "send corrections" button... but my pedantry wouldn't have been satisfied that way.

My apologies!

1
0
A. Coatsworth
Pint

Re: And for those of us...

The Real Academia de la Lengua proposed güisqui as the proper Spanish form of the word whisky.

As you can imagine, it never took off...

0
0

Finns, roamers, Nokia: So long, and thanks for all the phones

A. Coatsworth

Great!

I didn't kow Swype was available for the 700. I'm installing it right away.

I also love my 700, it's a great little smartphone... It has a few annoying quirks, and the sad thing is they could have been easily ironed out with a OS update

0
0

Confirmed by cockup: New iPhones will be named 5S and 5C

A. Coatsworth

These new iPhones and the iPad Mini remind me of that movie Ratatouille... when the fine cuisine chef died, his successor started using his image to sell all kinds of cheap crap form corn dogs to fried chicken to noodles, food that the original chef would have never thought of selling because he was a *classy* chef.

I have never liked Apple, or Steve Jobs for that matter, but one has to recognize that the iron grip Jobs had over the company's style and product range really gave Apple an important market differentiation. Seeing how now they are throwing by the board everything Jobs stood for (except his litigious mindset) is really strange

0
0

Nasty BOFHses. It burns us! It burns...

A. Coatsworth
Thumb Up

That was a big steaming load of... laughs

Nobody got cattle-prodded, nobody died (probably), and this was possibly the most devious, nastiest plan ever hatched by the BOfH.

I love to see he's keeping his repertoire fresh!

2
0

May the fourths be with you: Muso John Williams returns to Star Wars

A. Coatsworth

Re: Oh God

Seeing how The Mouse also owns Marvel but didn't cast Bieber or any other pop starlet as Avengers, I remain cautiously optimistic about this incoming trilogy.

You won't see me queuing at midnight for the premier, but I'll give them the benefit of doubt, at least until it is announced what role will Lucas play in the production. Hopefully it won't be anything more than consultant, or "associated something-or-other", and they won't let him anywhere near the script.

1
0

Wii U sales plunge: Nintendo hopes Mario and Zelda will shift some kit

A. Coatsworth

I think Wind Waker can help sales. Yes, it wasn't very well received because of it cartoon looks, and wasn't a killer app for the Cube.

But now Nintendo is betting for the nostalgia factor, which admittedly has a lot of potential to stir sales... I can't say if it's a good or bad thing, but it's a fact that nostalgia is all the rage these days

0
0

How our shaken Reg Playmonaut survived a 113,000ft stratodangle

A. Coatsworth
Happy

I don't know how much is The Reg paying to the person who came with the idea of using the Grauniad for the plane's left wing and Daily Mail for the right... whatever amount it is, it's not enough!

34
0

Schwarzenegger says 'I'll be back' for Terminator 5 reboot

A. Coatsworth
Thumb Up

Re: Outer Limits

"Demon with a glass hand" and "Soldier" it seems

At least according to an article from Cracked.com (gotta love that site)

0
0

Soylent days and soylent nights

A. Coatsworth
Pint

Is this brave hack drinking or eating something else besides this thing?

If not, does it really satisfies the hunger? I would have though that drinking a glass of whatever would do f*ck-all to keep the person from starving.

<--- I'd prefer THIS liquid diet, thank you very much

1
0

Is the next-gen console war already One?

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

Re: The future of gaming lies elsewhere IMHO...

I just had a taste of the future of gaming last weekend... and it was horrible.

It all started when I finally got my hands on Starcraft 2. After the install, which took the best part of 1 hour, including some obscure "optimizing", it decided it needed to download a patch. Sounded fine, until I found out it was a 7.8 GB patch... uhmmm.... The DVD sitting inside my dvdrom was not enough storage? Anyway after 3 days downloading (in this little country where I live, the normal internet connection is not more than 1 mbps) I finally got the game to start... and then it didn't want to recognize the game code I had already set up with my battlenet account. That was one more day in order to get it fixed. Bottom line: I needed 5 days just to get the game to actually let me play. Marvelous, just marvelous.

In the meantime, I started playing Modern Warfare 3 on my PS3. Graphics were impressive, and the plot was interesting enough, but that was not a game: It was a nice movie were they left me interact in certain scenes with my controller, but I failed mission after mission for not doing tasks in the exact way and the exact time the developer wanted me to. Want to take a moment to admire the scenery of a battle-torn NY? though luck, your teammates took the boat and left you behind. Want to try and pick a fight with those enemies? No dice, your AI mate was killed because you weren't stealthy enough.

And it wasn't even a long movie at that: The campaign mode took me barely 6 hours to finish. And I payed full price for that? The disc is barely more than an expansion set for the online multiplayer, which I am unable to play (see internet connection above).

If PC and console gaming are moving this way, I think this was my last generation as a game enthusiast (I'll leave the term "gamer" for more dedicated people)... I'll just live off the memories I can get on my Wii's Virtual Console and with the PS2 games rehashed in HD for the PS3, for as long as those consoles manage to continue alive.

</rant>

6
0

Crack Army pilot to be first PROPER British astronaut IN SPAAAACE

A. Coatsworth
Joke

I'd guess he was born in China...

1
0

Review: Samsung Galaxy S4

A. Coatsworth
WTF?

Thinner and narrower...

Does anyone, in their right mind, thought the SIII was unbearably bulky? seeing how it sold, I'll guess no.

So why Samsung, and in fact the whole industry, is locked in this race to make their phones razor-thin and feather-light?

I mean, I would have preferred a phone with the same dimensions as the SIII, with additional space to fit an even bigger battery... Obviously it's not completely fair to compare the battery life of the Nokias of old to this new generation of smartphones, but it seems to me the current trend (making phones with smaller bodies and bigger screens) is rather absurd.

But it seems we, as a market, are already accustomed to be grasping for a power outlet at the end of the day, every day, and that is a sad (and it seems avoidable) state of affairs

0
0

'Raining Blooderator' pays tribute to late Slayer guitarist

A. Coatsworth
Devil

Not sure if a cunning PR stunt...

But I don't care: this phrase is just beautiful: "RIP Jeff Hanneman – let your jams with Dio and Dimebag be heard on the thunder."

I can't think of a better sendoff for these titans

0
0

Yahoo! thanks! Asian! equity! for! 36! PERCENT! income! boost!

A. Coatsworth
Alert

Re: I rather agree that the Yahoo! house style is getting a little tiresome.

I don't think it's a joke anymore.

It's more like a part of El Reg's style guide: Yahoo! stories must have exclamation marks in the title, Google is to be referred to as the Chocolate Factory, and every Apple story must include the text "The register tried to contact Apple representatives but they have not answered at the time of publication"

And I don't have problems with any of them... I think they are part of the site's charm.

YMMV

3
1

Raspberry Pi space jaunt ends in dramatic mountain rescue

A. Coatsworth
Black Helicopters

What are they hiding?

Something was clearly (and poorly) edited from the first sky pic, near the bottom right corner. What did they find up there? Evidence of the sky-beasts that roam above us? An intelligence from beyond the stars? The newest project from the marvelous mad scientists at DARPA?

Tinfoil hat is firmly in place. Black choppers are circling. Conspiracy time is go!

2
0

Apple's marketing honcho Schiller attacks Android, Samsung

A. Coatsworth
Headmaster

I guess the author wanted to say "El Número Dos"

Other than that, I'll just say it's infuriating (and at the same time oddly amusing) watching both companies flinging sh*t at each other, like monkeys in a cage, rather than trying to convince customers about why their shiny glass bricks are better than the other's shiny glass bricks.

Not that the situation is going to change in the foreseeable future...

6
0

Sony promises PC-based PlayStation 4 for Christmas

A. Coatsworth
FAIL

Re: Social? .... Where's the SPLIT-SCREEN gameplay?!

"narcissistic wank". Indeed there's no better way to describe all this hype surrounding social networking.

Maybe I'd be interested in the list of games my friends are playing, but watching replays of their games? please... I can't understand why would anyone think I want to know what they are they doing every second of the day. Hell, I'm sure nobody cares about what I am doing when I play. As with current social networks, this will be a case where everybody broadcast for their own pleasure, so they can feel important on the web; and nobody, NOBODY listens... a pathetic state of affairs, really

And I couldn't agree more with you about the split screen gameplay. I found a fair number of PS3 games that had that option, but usually it was buried in the menus or, in the case of RE5, plainly absent from the menu, so you had to follow a series of cryptic button presses in order to get it.

3
0

El Reg contemplates the ultimate cuppa

A. Coatsworth
Alert

Not a connoisseur

... Far from it, as you shall see, but the only way I have found I enjoy tea is strong, with a generous amount of lemon juice and two sugars (Not iced tea, but hot tea with lemon)

For some reason, the taste of tea with milk makes me think of dirty socks... It's not that it *tastes* like socks (at least not exactly), but I have that strange association in my mind, and accordingly, find the tea with milk repulsive

0
0

China may axe 13-year console ban, games OK for kids after all

A. Coatsworth

Re: Puzzling

No. Not all of them are from South Korea

A quick search in the Bootnotes got me this: "A Chinese Dad has come up with a unique way of persuading his game-addicted son to turn engage with the real world: hiring gaming pros to destroy his morale by hunting him down online"

What a quick search didn't get me was how to put a link here, so I'll just leave the url:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2013/01/07/chinese_man_assassinates_son_online/

0
0

Nokia turns a PROFIT. Sort of

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

Re: so basically if they hadn't axed symbian

I just got a massively discounted Nokia 700. It's a nice little smartphone that uses Belle. It does what I need it to do and is actually very pleasant to use, barring a few minor hiccups when I unlock it.

But after all it's already 1 year old, and watching it I can't stop thinking *what could have been* if Symbian continued alive. It's really, really sad

6
0

Plasma boffins' POWERFUL wind now a key clue to fiery Sun

A. Coatsworth
Joke

Nah, something called "Large Plasma Device" probably consumes "Exotic Fuel-y Stuff" and is controlled via "Huge Thingamajigs with Knobs on Them"

1
0

Don't touch Sony, Panasonic's junk, says credit agency

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

"When a company reaches junk level, it will find it almost impossible to raise money for its business, which can push it over the edge"

So Finch is basically giving them the Kiss of Death. If true, t hat's a lot of power. Who controls it? is there any way to ensure it's objective?

8
0

Wii U disassembly reveals unusual innards

A. Coatsworth

Re: Only one thing I want to know

There is a proper controller... "classic pro" or something like that... can't remember the name. I was announced on last E3 and looks very much like a Xbox 360 controller (TOO much, for my liking)

0
0

New Zealand issues Hobbit money

A. Coatsworth
Pint

Re: Sadder still (was: Tui......)

So that's why skunky beer is skunky... I had always thought it was just a baseless perception, never knew the chemistry behind it.

And that's why I love El Reg's forums... you always learn something new!

(non-skunky) cheers!

0
0

Inside the real-world Double-O section of Her Majesty's Secret Service

A. Coatsworth
Joke

Re: "a major espionage centre like Vienna"

They are trying to get the secrets of the Hapsburg Napkin Fold, obviously

1
0

Nintendo Wii U launch and pricing disclosed

A. Coatsworth

Re: Is not the price, or the controller for me

That "Nintendo Land" thing that was announced in last E3 and a new super Mario Bros are the most important first party games that will be available at launch... If that's an indicator, I'll hope the family centric / party games emphasis of the Wii won't be completely lost with this new console.

I don't think Nintendo needs to ditch the hosts of new customers they got in order to get back the hardcore gamers... if they can balance both aspects, the WiiU will be a hit. Sounds risky, though

0
0

Windows 8? Nah: Win Phone 8 should give Apple the fear

A. Coatsworth
Windows

"No, the real Windows Phone 8 advantage is actually that it's not iOS or Android"

I wholeheartedly agree with the author here.

I'm stuck with a still trusty, but very old and badly aged Nokia phone. I haven't migrated to a new one for a simple reason: I dislike Google. The problem is I dislike Apple even more, and I'm pretty sure I can't be the only person in this situation.

When HP bought Palm, my hopes went thru the roof: I had found HP iPaqs to have rather acceptable hardware, but appalling behavior, and Palm could have been the solution. I shed a tear for WebOS when HP killed it.

Now there's a new option in town, and given my (admittedly somewhat irrational) aversion for both Apple and Android, I may as well give Win Phone a chance.

0
3

Ten movies inspired by video games

A. Coatsworth
Thumb Up

Re: Silent Hill wasn't bad.

You're right. The first half in particular was surprisingly good, they made a fine job capturing the creepy and disturbing ambient of the game and translating it to the movie.

Sadly, in the second half they just dropped the ball, somewhere just after the jaw-droppingly brutal attack of the Pyramid Head. I don't know, I just feel they abandoned the links to the games and started doing *whatever* with the characters... the quality of the film fell sharply as a consequence.

When they <SPOILERS> killed Cybill </SPOILERS>, I knew they had gone too far.

Even so, it's one of the best video game movies out there. Which is kind of sad if you think about it

1
1

Amazon exploited by hacker in scribe's epic Apple iCloud pwn

A. Coatsworth
Paris Hilton

A lingering question

"Phobia said that the whole intrusion was designed to take control of Honan's Twitter feed because it had a three-character handle: @mat."

Why? What's so special about a three-character name?

.... Or Phobia has phobia of short handles?

1
1

FATTIES are DESTROYING THE WORLD, scream mad professors

A. Coatsworth
WTF?

Re: Too Many Humans

I would say it was Agent Smith, or maybe the Gozer the Gozerian

... because if a person wrote that, talking about humans in 3rd person, he or she needs professional help, pronto!

0
0

Sony slams Nintendo Wii U functionality

A. Coatsworth

Vita integration

I only see 2 options here: If the PS4 games are made to really integrate the Vita into the gameplay, but I don't have the Vita, will I be missing half the game because I am playing an incomplete version with just the basic controller? In this case, I could be forced to buy the Vita just to fully utilize the console and games I already have.

On the other hand, if the games are created to work fine without the Vita, I would just get access to throw-away gimmicks that probably won't justify buying the handheld console (just like it happened with the GameBoy Advance and Game Cube... hooking them up was a waste of time and money)

In the case of WiiU, the tablet is part of the console, so the games *should* be optimized to use it. I'd say It's a safe bet that at least first party Nintendo games will be making a good use of it.

3
0

Gamers, test your 1990s knowledge

A. Coatsworth
FAIL

Damn you, Register... damn you to hell!

I *had* to work today, didn't you know?

The FAIL? it's for me, and for today's tasks

0
0

Steve Jobs was top of the flops, says Apple's Tim Cook

A. Coatsworth
Coat

D10 Tech conference...

So, when Apple representatives are talking, would it be the "iD10-T" conference?

10
1

Return to Castle Wolfenstein

A. Coatsworth
Unhappy

"jarhead black-humour"

Great game actually., I still should have the CD somewhere... but they made a terrible mistake with the "black humour" mentioned by the writer: they made me feel pity and even *gulp* sympathy for the poor nazi soldiers... a thing that should never, ever happen!

At the start of one level you could hear 2 sentries complaining because the night was freezing and the high command hadn't issued them with enough blankets, so they had to endure the night shift under prepared... a few second later, I hosed them with a spray of hot lead, it was the only sensible thing to do. In another level, other 2 soldiers were scared sh*tless by the murdered beast that had escaped from the dungeon (i.e. Blazkowitz) Poor, poor guys

0
0

Syrian secret police endorse male hair remover

A. Coatsworth
Black Helicopters

Thanks to this article and fellow commentards, I've visited, in rapid succession, pages about a drum of lube, a children's book, pepper spray and a male hair removal gel... all linked from an article that directly addresses torture...

Now, the FBI is watching me.... isn't it? ISN'T IT??

Black choppers... I'm certain they're circling me...

4
0

<b>SPACE</b> the final frontier

A. Coatsworth
Alien

Satellite tracking

Hi all

I'm trying to look for a site that allows me to "see" what satellites or other orbiting objects were visible from a given point in the ground at a given date. I've checking heavens-above but, although it's a great site, don't provide this capability (or at least not during daylight hours)... Google only took me so far...

The reason for the question (as if it matters) is that I saw today a really faint dot in the sky, around 11:30 am, I watched it by sheer chance in the first place, as it was almost invisible. It wasn't Sirius, as it seemed to move slowly and in a seemingly straight line, but seemed too distant to be a plane. I thought it could be the ISS (it wasn't) or maybe an Iridium satellite, but cant find a way to be sure.

Little green men from Outer Space? I hope no...

0
0

Biologists create synthetic DNA capable of EVOLUTION

A. Coatsworth
Alert

Tekeli-li... tekeli-li

Because morphing bio-blobs worked sooo well for the Elder Ones...

1
0

Page: