198 posts • joined 7 May 2008
Same problems here
It went down before lunch and has been back up about an hour (approx 15:30 when it came back). I'm in the UK. Were these problems UK/EU only or worldwide?
I thought it was just chimps that could push pianos around.
Given the general theme of the comments in this thread, particularly the first comment from AlbertH and the AC who responded, it seems to me that no sensible mobile user trusts Ofcom, the Networks or RootMetrics for accurate stats.
Would The Register be able to step up and conduct their own research with other independent groups?
Granted, it's unlikely that such research would carry some weight with Ofcom, but a man can dream.
"make something wacko and darpa'ish like artificially intelligent jihadi seeking rocket dolphins"
So, sharks with frikkin' laser beams v2.0?
I have a bad feeling about this ...
I get the impression that Dave, George, Nick et. al strongly suspect they are going to lose at the next election and end up out of a job. Thus they are making these "laws" so they can use their golden parachutes to land in a nice directorship role in one of the Silicon Roundabout startups (or even as a roving ambassador for Google).
Makes me feel decidedly queasy.
While watching a couple of games with a few beers and good company, I noticed the brightly coloured, almost day-glo, boots most of the players were wearing. I wondered if tapes of the games could be analysed to predict, or at least simulate, movement of players on the pitch. In video games, the player would control one team member (the one with the ball), while the game's AI would move the other players to tactically important places on the pitch.
Sounds like the SAP software could be used to improve the AI of games like FIFA. Given that Sony were one of the World Cup's major sponsors, a Sony/SAP tie-up seems possible.
Beer Icon because several were involved in formulating this idea :-)
"The Computer is your friend!"
"Will all REG sector troubleshooters please report for termination immediately."
"Thank you for your cooperation. Have a nice day."
At least Paranoia gives an IT angle to this story.
PS: I am well aware of the big overlap between IT and RPGs. Hence the joke icon.
Will this be open to non-Scotland-based businesses?
A famous race course, for instance, might be interested in a.scot .
Quick question ...
I don't know if this has been answered (or even asked) elsewhere but exactly which week in 2012 was the "research" carried out?
Was it before or after the 18th May 2012 IPO?
Inquiring minds want to know.
Paris because she probably doesn't know either :-)
"Or poke fun at things closer to home... try Siri in Welsh, Gaelic or Jordie for weird."
Jordie (*) ... Wasn't he the engineer in Star Trek: The Next Generation? Or did you mean Geordie? The dialect spoken in the Newcastle area.
(*) Yes, I know it was spelled Geordi
There were similar stories floating about years ago, when the Polytechnics were "upgrading" to Universities.
Newcastle Poly wanted to become City University Newcastle upon Tyne and it took some guy on the print line for the new letterheaded paper to point out the acronym. Admittedly, this might be some sort of urban legend.
The students at Sheffield Poly wanted to rename it Sheffield Hallam Institute of Technology.
Re: "Blind, drunken Gods, swaying to the sound of mad piping...."
"Further perusal of Jimbo's Excellent HTML Store™ revelas that..."
Excellent! Have an upvote.
Re: UK company bosses. "We don't just sell out to anyone"
"Is the VC backers forcing them to sell up at the first hint of someone who'll give them anything close to their preferred return?"
Cynical but probably true. However, there is an alternative view: that UK bosses know they'll never get appropriate support and protection from Whitehall and sell to overseas companies who can protect their assets (e.g. IP and patents).
PS: "Christopher Clague" ... the offspring of Nick Clegg and William Hague? <<shudder>>
Standing on the shoulders of giants?
Additional point: a boffin should build on the work of his or her predecessors. They can take the work of Newton, Einstein, Galileo, Oppenheimer et.al and think "wouldn't it be neat if we did this?" Of course, when their new ideas come to fruition, they should credit the original sources and perhaps explain what led to their examining this new line of research.
Anyone who takes someone else's research, builds on it and then claims all the credit is not a boffin. He or she would be a rip-off merchant.
Grammar Nazi icon because he has the look of a boffin-turned-lecturer :-)
Re: I really, really, hate that word
"I really hate the term boffin. It is too often used by certain publications to describe a man (and it is always a man, women in science tend to go by the term top science tottie) who though clever in a narrow field is incapable of dressing themselves in the morning or finding their glasses despite being perched on the top of their heads.."
That's the whole point of this discussion: to reclaim the word boffin as a term of respect and admiration for those in the scientific community who know their field inside-out and upside-down and can then apply that knowledge to bring about significant benefits.
These tax breaks ...
Are they a contributing factor in "24 Live Another Day" being shot in London?
Serious question. Not wanting to start a flame war.
Black helicopter because that's what's chasing Jack Bauer right about now :-)
"The Licensed Taxi Drivers’ Association argues that the mobile app is basically just a form of taxi meter, which private cars and minicabs aren’t legally allowed to have."
This point puzzled me. The private cars and minicabs don't have the meter: the customer who wants the taxi has the meter, in the form of the app on their phone.
"Can anybody suggest a way of spying on baddies while not looking over goodies' shoulders too ?"
They used to call it HUMINT.
"Let's get that diameter in perspective: drag-and-drop HR 5171 A in place of our sun, and it's good-bye to Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, the asteroid belt, Jupiter and Saturn."
So would that place Uranus, Neptune and Pluto in the Goldilocks Zone? Or would they all be like Daddy Bear's porridge?
Inquiring minds want to know.
Sounds like a plan. Have a beer on me.
All you need after that is for some astro-engineers to fit rocket engines to the base of the pub and then the party will really fly! It can raid the Home Counties for more supplies (but good luck finding tambourine girls in Essex, Kent or Berkshire).
A Plutonium rock band from the Gagralaka mind zones
Didn't Disaster Area have a fully robotic drummer? Their meatsack drummer was on a beach light years away where he "had found a small rock that would be friends with him". DA's manager was relieved that the timing of the cymbalistics would be correct.
Nuke icon because that's somewhat quieter than a Disaster Area concert :-)
Re: USB was thought to be shorthand for a European country
I was going to suggest "United States of Berlin". I believe it's been tried a couple of times in the past.
RE: @AC, 22Jan14-01:03 GMT
A prime candidate for Flame of the Week? He missed the RANdoM CapitALs but, other than that, a fine effort IMO.
"The trademark filing has it covering all kinds of non-software things. Notable in its inclusion is "Headphones," which retroactively makes Skullcandy headphones a violation of this trademark. I'm sure other instances could be found."
So where would this leave the Highlander movie? (there can be only one, two and three don't exist ;)
Hooker: "Hi, I'm Candy."
Kurgan: "Of course you are."
Re: Like taking candy from a public domain baby.
"It's a bit cheeky, copying someone else's game mechanism and then trying to claim it as your own IP!"
Well put. The follow-up question being: who actually owns the rights/IP/copyright/software patents/source code to the original "Bejewelled" game(s)? (Or whatever family of games can trace its lineage back to the first version.)
This is a serious question. I'm not trying to start a flame war.
Re: Man pages
"history" has been completely rewritten, and is now called "herstory".
The "touch" command has been removed from the standard distribution due to its inappropriate use by high-level managers.
Brought to you by the People's Committee for Democratically Organizing the System (PC-DOS).
Re: Online toilet paper lovers?
You're dead on with the tracing paper thing ...
I remember some grafitti on a toilet cubicle wall at Newcastle Poly. Went something like
"I've been at this place for three f***cking years and only now do they start using bog roll that's worth nicking!"
Re: Make The World A Better Place? Microsoft?
"Whatever you do will be more fun."
I think Microsoft's funniest advertising fail was for Windows 95. The soundtrack was the Rolling Stones' "Start me up", which was all well and good when clicking on the Start button was what Win 95 was all about. But that song then does go on to say "You make a grown man cry."
The irony was obviously lost in Redmond.
"Have you got any idea how many thousands of letters Lester receives from 4 year olds every day? El Reg would go bankrupt if they sent them all mugs."
Not all Reg commentards are 4 years old. Although the mental age of some of them seems about the same.
"had a pint of Jollyboat breweries Grenville's Renown yesterday. Sweet and really lovely. So I had another."
You stopped at TWO? Or were you just unable to order the third?
We have to get off this rock
I've upvoted a couple of earlier posters (Dan Paul and Ben Holmes) because I agree with their sentiments.
Where Dan's point is concerned, I'm with Stephen Hawking, who said "I don't think the human race will survive the next thousand years, unless we spread into space". If we haven't left Earth in significant numbers before then, then the human race will be blasted back to the Stone Age. Look at the Shoemaker-Levy comet impact on Jupiter. That's a near miss in spatial terms. If it had hit the mid-Atlantic, where would we be?
Ben's point is the main problem:
"An[d] so the endless cycle of underfunded grandstand projects such as SLS continue, whilst NASA slips further and further into obscurity."
The technology, the brains and the desire (Elon Musk and even Richard Branson) either exists or is on the drawing board right now. What we (as a species) lack is the political will to make it happen.
Heck. Rant over.
Re: Operation Extinguish
"Ubuntu Edge was a flop, rebranded as a ¨success¨. Just like MS claims Win8 is a success."
"MS´s plan must be working our nicely, they have clearly shifted gears into Operation Extinguish and this funding disaster was clearly part of that."
You are Eadon and I claim my five pounds!
Missing from the end of the video
The gorillabot sits down and starts picking fleas off its programmer :-)
Re: MS Learning Fail
"This is the 21st century, and anyone in technical fields or with a smattering of interest about computers ought to be encouraged to learn how to make computers do what *they* want, not just being taught how to operate Microsoft Office."
Well said, Quxy.
Though the follow-up question would be: how do we give those "in a technical field or with a smattering of interest about computers" the chance to learn? I got my first micro back in the Spectrum days because I wanted to cheat on my maths homework and soon learned that the machine couldn't perform miracles just because I switched it on. I had an Oric-1, with something of a dearth of mathematics programs, so to get anywhere I had to program the damn thing. It taught me an awful lot.
So how do we encourage the incoming wave of schoolkids and students, literally, to "get with the program"?
"His plan is to solve malnutrition in one product and it looks like he has it. "
How can this solve malnutrition in famine-struck tracts of the Third World? It seems to need clean water and a means to refrigerate the final mixture to make it drinkable.
Will the maker be funding such developments with the profits from this gloop?
Inquiring minds want to know.
As a H2G2 Fan ...
I've seen so many quotes from the books in these comments that surely we can come up with a new story? There have been 6 books so far (I haven't read And Another Thing). Shouldn't we commentards be working on the 7th?
Re: "...beaming out of faraway clouds of water and alcohol."
"This story doesn't need a punch-line."
No. It needs a punch bowl for all that alcohol and unidentifiable bits of fruit.
Time to go ...
I've had this conversation before, in a pub after several beers.
If you want a gritty, "gets sh1t done" Doctor, I elect Philip Glenister (aka Gene Hunt). Despite the mass hilarity which ensued, the idea coincides with an older, tougher Doctor with fewer "emo" issues.
Also: the Tardis could become an Audi Quattro.
<<< Mine's the flame-retardant one.
NAT, routers etc
Commenters above have mentioned that NAT, routers and other kit make identification by IP address difficult, if not impossible, and not "beyond reasonable doubt" in a court. These commenters are technically correct (the best kind of correct).
But what happens next?
Maybe the government will push for IPv6 rollout? Then everyone can have their own IP address, which would be required to make your mobile, smartphone, desktop, laptop or tablet connect to the internet. Then the police and intelligence services will know who sent the messages (unless the alleged sender can prove their device was stolen or otherwise compromised).
Is that a helicopter I hear?
In the words of a very wise geranium ...
"Oh no. Not again."
Lies, damned lies and statistics
Says it all, really.
Oh BTW. Why didn't the episode end with Kzzzerrrt?
Re: Anything we can do
" "where the hell are they?"
A few thousand light years away, on average (give or take a few thousand orders of magnitude). "
Or camped out on the planet Rupert, watching us.
Thumb icon, for the Hitchhikers Guide.
Sounds a bit sinister in a non-descript way. Like Projects Paperclip, Grudge and Blue Book. I know the names don't describe the projects' purpose (because that would give the game away to anyone attempting to spy on said projects) but "Project 1640" sounds like they know more than they are telling.
Or am I just being paranoid? :-)
Where's my tinfoil hat? In that coat there, thanks!
From Steven Wright
"I love defenceless animals, specially in a good gravy."
Fire to roast them over, obviously.
I read the book ...
"All fleeing the law and killing people left and right."
In Lucas' original novel (if that's not too flattering a description) of Star Wars, the introduction is in the Journal of the Whills and appended by Senator Leia Organa. It says
"They were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Naturally, they became heroes."
MMeier, I understand with what you say. Take a 20 year old farm boy, give him a gun and he'll happily shoot (what he perceives as) the bad guys, then blow up their space station home (presumably killing thousands of other bad guys) without showing a shred of guilt.
Strange morals they have in a galaxy, far far away.
"Considering that there hasn't been a star wars movie in 30 years (snort), I'm looking forward to the revival."
Claws in, kitten. Or Rancor monster, Wampa or whatever.
I'd like to say you were wrong but, sadly, you're not.
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back ...
... with Carrie Fisher as a nun.
Also, isn't she in one of the Scream franchise as a "down and out actress working in the props department" taking the mickey out of how fame does your head in?
Icon because Carrie Fisher still has IT :-)
"Weirdly I'd forgotten how good looking Carrie Fisher was back in the day"
I hadn't forgotten. Ever. I remember the real and only Star Wars (Episode IV) back when I was 9 and still think ... Wow!
Re: "Dangerous Ordnance"
A "phased plasma rifle in the 40-watt range", perhaps?
- Infosec geniuses hack a Canon PRINTER and install DOOM
- Boffins say they've got Lithium batteries the wrong way around
- Game Theory Half a BILLION in the making: Bungie's Destiny reviewed
- 'Windows 9' LEAK: Microsoft's playing catchup with Linux
- Phones 4u slips into administration after EE cuts ties with Brit mobe retailer