* Posts by Khaptain

2893 posts • joined 4 May 2008

Bad news everyone: Cybercrime is getting even easier

Khaptain

Re: lunchtime!?

I am sure that restoring eveyone's data back to 2010 would go down real well, you would very quickly become their favourite administrator..... Just be carefull of anyone that carries a heavy metal bar in their handbag/coat pocket.

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Bored with Blighty? Relocation lessons for the data centre jetset

Khaptain

Re: Depresses me that consideration for UK areas...

They could then pump that hot water around Scotland during the long dreary winter nights.

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Khaptain

Re: Depresses me that consideration for UK areas...

And why wasn't the rest of Europe included, there are a ton of data centres here on the continent. Keeping stuff on the continent also makes Data Security people a lot more friendly...

With the United States Patriot Act etc, your data becomes their data which is not welcomed in many European and Swiss like, countries.

Definately agree with the OP, London <> UK......

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Volvo V60 Polestar: Speak softly, carry a big stick, dress like a Smurf

Khaptain

Re: WTF

Agreed, actually showing the "whole" car would have been a lot more usefull than a dainty little pic of a dashboard....

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Barry Obama declares national emergency over foreign hackers

Khaptain
WTF?

The opposite situation

And does the rest of the world have the right to sanction the USA whose "agencies" are only to happy to infiltrate, pirate, hack, spy, snoop, steal on the rest of the world....

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Project Spartan: We get our claws on Microsoft's browser for Windows 10

Khaptain
Mushroom

Re: Fork of IE?

"You could use a trident."

I presume you mean the missile rather than the Neptune variety .

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This one weird trick deletes any YouTube flick in just a few clicks

Khaptain

What about the comments

Since YouTube comments have now becoem the playgound for all form of insult, hatred and general unhappiness it would have been more interesting to delete the damned comments than the videos.

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Anti-gay Indiana starts backtracking on hated law after tech pressure

Khaptain

Re: Big problems for humanity... are exploitable vulnerabilities/zeroday trading opportunities?

"The biggest problem facing humanity....is XXXXXX. The sooner the great unwashed start to think for themselves and wise up to the fact that it's all smoke an mirrors and dogma only serves to make good men do evil things, the better or all of us."

XXXXX could be replaced by several things

Religion, Politics, Publicity, Money, Royalty, etc etc take your pick.

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Microsoft's Windows 10 build list snowballs for Lumia mobes

Khaptain

I mistook Nadella for Tom Cook, thinking that it was just some El Reg irony. The other guy could have been Wozniak after a haircut and shave...

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Hotel Wi-Fi not only hideously expensive – it's horribly insecure

Khaptain

Re: Anybody not running through a VPN deserves what they get, bedbugs and all.

"But I guess for you it's also easy to grow, and maybe kill, your food, sewn your clothes, and build your transport vehicles."

I can do VPN and all of the above except for building transport vehicles but that is nothing that can't be resolved by using the same tools as those used in the killing of the food scenario.

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700,000 beautiful women do the bidding of one Twitter-scamming man

Khaptain

Re: Ahhh Twitter...

"There is also the 5 Journalists paid to follow him"

Who are all called Stephen Fry

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Tim Cook: I'll give just a THIRD of what Gates gave to charity last year

Khaptain

Not really Tim Cook's money

Apple's consumers are giving products to charity... due to the "added value" that thay must pay.

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Distribution of cream among EMC executive fat cats revealed

Khaptain

Is that Four Horsemen that I see in the near distance ?

Yes, it is and they appear to be galloping towards us at an increasing speed.

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GCHQ: Ensure biz security by STOPPING everyone from TALKING

Khaptain

Re: Solution

"Why do it discretely? Just do them all in one batch."

A good example of an optimised process and much quicker than simple attrition.

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Khaptain

Solution

"Staff in general are the "weakest link in the security chain" and disgruntled employees and the mischief they can create are a particular threat, the spooks advise."

I this is the case the why not immediately disband the entire GCHQ as it in itself presents the greatest risk to the country and it's people.

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PIRATES and THIEVES to get Windows 10 as BOOTY

Khaptain

Re: Balancing the accounts.

"If Microsoft give them a free and legitamate copy, then they're not pirates anymore. Problem solved!"

Since they will be installing over a pirated copy, which will probably get flagged during the installation....they will effectively now be using a legitimate copy of windows but will have been flagged as previously being pirates and therefore will get monitored slightly more closely than everyone else.

It's my conspiracy theory for the day....

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Khaptain

Balancing the accounts.

At the end of the day it's probably far more valuable to keep track of what the pirates are doing by giving them a free copy of windows than it is to try and combat piracy.

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You – yes, YOU – can now 3D print your very own Paul McCartney

Khaptain

Feeling faint

Quick somebody pass me the sick jug, the contents of my stomach have become disturbed....

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Samsung puts eight-core processor IN A WATCH

Khaptain

Whisky in the jar

I sometimes put a double or even a triple dram of GlenMorangie in my glass in the evening. Does it help the taste, not even remotely, it's fine with a single dram.

8 cores will not help the watch tell the time any more than a single core. Shit my desktop machine is only a double core and I have 15 heavy applications open at this moment and all of them run fine...

Just like the article on removing the bloat from Windows 10 it would be far more interesting to see what you can do with less rather than with more.

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Honey, I shrunk the Windows footprint

Khaptain
Go

Don't stop there

If they can remove the bloat from a tablet, please, please, please do the same for PCs.

Small and light is good... honestly, I really do not need tiles, sidebars or widgets that tell me the latest stock prices. Keep it nice and tight, everyone loves nice and tight ( fnnrrrr).

Why not start of a race to the lightest, smallest OS rather than the heaviest... ( I doubt that they will reach DSL size though but we can dream on anyway)

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Bride legs it from wedding after groom proves unable to add up

Khaptain

Re: Clown was "Pennywise"

" IIRC only silver (a decent budget) could stop the beast that was Pennywise's alter ego. "

Now we are getting somewhere, it's the infamous Silver Bullet Syndrome. Who'd have thunk it, from scary clowns to management paradigms all in one thread.

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Khaptain

Re: Could be a good way to get out of a wedding...

"I think I'd rather get married than appear that stupid in front of a crowd."

I thing I would personally prefer to look stupid for 15 minutes than live with Dopey or the Elephant (wo)man for the rest of my life...But each to his own.

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Khaptain
Coat

I was upset at the Stephen King novel "IT". Never once did he mention anything even remotely related to IT, instead he concentrated his writing on a bloody clown....

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Khaptain
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Could be a good way to get out of a wedding...

" who looks like 10 miles of bad road"

That put a smile on my monday morning face...

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Khaptain

Re: Eh?

var x = "six"

var y = 15

var z

z = x+y

Display the value of z...... Ouch

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Swedish prosecutors finally agree to London interview for Assange™

Khaptain

Re: Khaptain Provenance

@Matt

Meditate on the words "a place to hide made of cold white crystals"

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Khaptain

Provenance

I wonder if the accompanying policeman will be British or #cough#CIA#cough# American ?

Be wary if they are carrying an umbrella.. ( #cough# polonium #cough# - lots of dust in this forum #cough# )

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X+Y shows teens are teens, regardless of where they are 'on the spectrum'

Khaptain

Classification

I have the impression that society has become increasingly involved in giving a classification to people....by age, illnesss, colour, race, religion, size, weight, intelligence etc

What I do not understand is the fascination for this classification. Objectively, what does it ultimately provide other than a means of eventual segregation ?

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Disney CEO: Dead Steve Jobs choc-blocked me!

Khaptain

All the bad points

Steve Jobs really was a twunt, it appears as though he had a multitude of

shitty character traits. Greed, jealousy, avarice, bad tempered, unkind, selfish, not the kind of person that I personally would raise to hero status...

I think that El Reg also helps raising Steve Jobs up, simply creating articles about the man is enough, especially when the articles are not satirical. No points to El Reg there......

Will we raise Warren Buffet, Bill Gates or "Steve Balmer" ( shudder) up to the same status when they die.

Quote of the day, "Apple because Steve" ( see attitude above)...

I'm off to the shooting range "because Gaston"....17, 26, 30....

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$17,000 Apple Watch: Pointless bling, right? HA! You're WRONG

Khaptain
Coat

What about the cheap buggers

Now all the 350$ versions will just seem like cheap tat....

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'Roly poly' soft, wobbly robot BANGS EXPLOSIVELY, leaps 0.5m in air

Khaptain

Boom yodel, boom yodel

Having skimmed 4 words of the article thouroughly studied the article, I honestly believed that I was about to read an article about Roly Poly Swiss bomb makers.

It would have been a little bit paradoxical that the land of the Geneva Convention and Human Rights made bombs. There are several Roly Poly people though.

Although having given a litttle bit of thought, it probably wouldn't take much to make this into a roly poly bomb...

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Apple Watch: Wait a minute! This puny wrist-puter costs 17 GRAND?!

Khaptain

Re: Seems odd to limit access to HBO Now.

Not a problem, it will be torrented long before it appears on the usual platforms and there will be no doubt that Apple users will be 100% to blame.. No-one will be able to blame the TPB for this one.

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Microsoft: You'll get the next Windows 10 build when we're GOOD AND READY

Khaptain

Renaming the inteface

They can't find a new name for TIFKAM / Modern and are still digging deep to come up with a name that won't remind everyone of the disaster known as 8.

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Oi. APPLE fanboi! You with the $10k and pocket on fire! Fancy a WATCH?

Khaptain

Re: Resale Value - not a lot

"Give quiche a chance."

Was it John Lemon or Yolk Ohno that said that ?

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Litecoin-mining code found in BitTorrent app, freeloaders hit the roof

Khaptain

Re: "buying that Blu-Ray in the first place"

"And the "but if you just clicked “Next, Next, Next..." doesn't fly with me."

You have the chance to opt out and you don't use ut, that's not the fault of the greedy.....

After all this isn't MS Office that you are installing..

OK I digress, the Java installer is just as bad, but we already know that it has become a POS.

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'Hi, I'm from Microsoft and I am GOING TO KILL YOU'

Khaptain

Re: Outsourcing to India - Payback

"1. They would have done it even if we did not teach them. It is not that difficult"

Technically it's not difficult, to be convincing requires some skill. We taught them how to become "helpdesks", and this is exactlly the skill set that they are using.

2 : I would not call a multi-million dollar business a failure. If they suck so much how come they managed to earn so much..

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Khaptain
Devil

Outsourcing to India - Payback

So know that we have taught the Indians to become proficient with computers and phone systems the bad guys amongst them have realised how they can use them against us..

Maybe in return we can start phoning them and offering them really high paid jobs in London, they are after all very technically efficient people, all the we need to know in advance is their IP address ........etc........etc ...... of course it's not a scam

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Paul Allen hunts down sunken Japanese WWII super-battleship

Khaptain
Flame

What is this "closure" that we here about nowadays

"bring closure to the families of those lost"

Can someone actually provide me with a clear definition of what "closure" actually means.

I have no idea why but I always have the impression that this word was invented purely for the media,lawyers or those that believe that people can come back from the dead.

If it simply means "coming to terms with someone death" or the "finally accepting someone's death" why not just use those term. Closure sounds "pityfull", it makes people appear weak even when this is not necassarily the case. It feels as though it is just another one of those words that the media or soap operas like to use to dramatize things unnecessarily.

I really can't imagine that many Japanese famillies have had difficulty sleeping for the last 70 years because they still had some doubts about whether their son's ship really did sink and whether he did or did not die in consequence..

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Snowden 'ready to return to US', claims lawyer

Khaptain
Coat

Re: an outraged public - Latest News headlines - Faux news

"An outraged member of the public, #cough# Jack Ruby lookalike stooge #cough#, surged out and shot Snowden in the back just 5 minutes after he, Snowden, had put his feet on the tarmac. No-one knows who this mysterious assassin was and the FBI whisked him away before even Faux News cameras could catch a glimpse. A freak thunderstorm had knocked out the Airport security cameras so we can't provide those images either...although we have heard rumours that the assassin might have been dressed in a Ronald MacDonalds costume, although that has not yet been confirmed

"President Obamy has already expressed his sincere condolescences to the victims familly. Obamy expressed his concern and disgust that anyone should ever feel the need or be forced to wear a Ronald MacDonalds outfit .

An FBI officer, mysteriously wearing a false red nose and some very long shoes, confirmed that nothing had yet been confirmed but that the entire force was already on the case and had been for at least the last 3 weeks !!"

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Forget 1,000 lashes for Facebook posts, Saudis now want to behead blogger Raif Badawi

Khaptain

Re: Women driving

You and I might know that but a lot of the Djhadists don't. The Christian Crusades, which this seems akin too, were a bloody period for all concerned.

What's scarier than anything else is that there does not appear to be a lack of candidates joining ISIS. I do not know if ISIS forces their soldiers to fight for them but it definately looks like they are doing it out of their free will.

It's not so difficult to see why unemployed, disillusioned Brits, French and even Swiss nationals from various ethnic cultures are being pulled into the regime. Whereas the local goverments offer no apparent hope, ISIS is offereing them a place in the "Kaliphate"... Of course they are just being used as cannon fodder but they apparently don't see it that way.

I wonder what "real" solutions could actually be employed.

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Khaptain
Coat

Re: Just a thought

The Catholic church never had a problem with that.

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First peek at the next Ubuntu 15.04 nester line-up

Khaptain

Re: Nope

Mint has been N°1 on Distrowatch for quite some time and not without reason.

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In Barcelona, no one can hear you scream ... HTC, Valve unleash Giger-inspired VR headgear

Khaptain
Thumb Down

Giger - Really !!

Anyone that knows Gigers works would have a hard time finding anything Giger related... A couple of cables sticking out the top, cmon... I really don't see too much of the BioMechaniks here, or is it all virtual.....

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How good a techie are you? Objective about yourself and your skills?

Khaptain

Re: Why?

Given that computers are an embodiment of "binary" states

TFTFY

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Facebook meets Belgian minister: PLEASE, sir, NOT THE PROBE

Khaptain
Coat

Complete ban during the <strike>trial</strike> discussions

If they banned Facebook maybe people could get back to living meaningful lives.... On second thoughts did they ever truly have meaningful lives ?

Nihilistic existential thought for the day : does anyone have a meaningful life ? does life have a meaning ? what is life ?

Bloody Belgians should be banned from the earth for making me think like that on a Monday. Send them back from whence they came ( and send El Zuk with them).

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Seven months of Basil Brush on YouTube: Er, boom boom?

Khaptain

Not so bad

Think yourselves lucky that it wasn't Sooty and Sweep.

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Boffins now one step closer to male birth control pill

Khaptain

Re: And the IT angle

Alice and Bob no longer practice penetration due to the latest pentest results showing that there may some existing viral infection.

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So long, Cyanogen! OnePlus says its future belongs to OxygenOS

Khaptain

Just another Distro

Ok so how does this change from being just another distro.

When I initially read the article I thought that someone was going to build an OS from the ground up but this is not the case. If AOSP is being used as the base won't this automatically relegate them into a trailing position, premanantly one step behind Google, since AOSP releases depend on Google's releasing them when it see fit?

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Lashed Saudi blogger Raif: Prince Charles has word with new king

Khaptain
Coat

Re: @AC "32 mins" (whatever that means, ElReg) Was: Dear Al Saud,

"FFS he ate her?"

That all depends on how you like your curry cunny.

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Dutch government websites KO'd by 10-hour DDoS

Khaptain
Coat

Re: Photo library

They all look a little bit high... coincidence ?

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