* Posts by Long John Brass

299 posts • joined 12 Apr 2007

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Having offended everyone else in the world, Linus Torvalds calls own lawyers a 'nasty festering disease'

Long John Brass
Unhappy

Linus is GOD

And I wish I could be more like him

The number of times I have wished I had the leeway to tell other parts of $ORG I work in to pull their fucking heads out their arses and do their fucking jobs ....

These $diots are the reason we can't have nice things as a species.

But; I have a mortgage, bills to pay etc .... So I play nice, and things slowly keep getting worse

Because the shit flinging monkeys outnumber me :(

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Microsoft has open-sourced PowerShell for Linux, Macs. Repeat, Microsoft has open-sourced PowerShell

Long John Brass

Re: Have you used Powershell?

There was also a REXX for windows

*Sniff* I also used to use REXX back in the days of nt3.5.1; Nice thing was that REXX also had a linux port at the time.

Just checked ... seems like the REXX interpreter is still there!

$ apt-cache search rexx

regina-rexx - Regina REXX interpreter

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Long John Brass

Re: "On Linux we’re just another shell"

I feel your pain ...

<tinfoilhat>

Systemd is a Microsoft plot to destroy Linux, along with the abhorrent abortion that is akonadi which makes modern mail clients about as reliable as a wet paper tissue in a tornado, recently kmail/akonadi decided to upgrade my e-mail data to /dev/null, not corrupted, not moved ,empty fucking directory! :(

</tinfoilhat>

I read the Systemd whitepaper and some of the ideas there were not that bad; But oh my god the implementation is crap, bloated and pure fucking evil

Colour me sad :(

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Google's brand new OS could replace Android

Long John Brass
Gimp

Re: Lost my interest and lunch at C++

FWIW, not all OOP is necessarily as bad as that aspect of C++

Quite right; It's often worse; See Java

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Long John Brass
Mushroom

Lost my interest and lunch at C++

Because we all know that a big dose of OOP always makes things better and faster

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300 million pelicans? Pah. What 6 billion plastic bags really weigh

Long John Brass
FAIL

Re: Niche scenario - but annoying regardless

Am I the only person who can't understand why we can't just have truly disposable bags free of charge? E.g. recycled paper bags. In this day and age it can't be beyond our technology or economics to provide a bag that won't murder a million turtles if it ends up in landfill by mistake?

When I were a lad I can clearly remember my teachers at school haranguing us to remind our parents to always ask for the new plastic bags instead of the old paper ones. The idea being that plastic is recyclable and doesn't murder trees

Funny how the world turns eh :)

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Get yer gnashers round 64-layer 3D NAND, beam WDC and Toshiba

Long John Brass
Mushroom

Re: Layer limit?

My guess is thermal limits will start becoming the issue after a while.

Integrated Inter-layer Cooling solutions anyone?

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Smartphones aren't tiny PCs, but that's how we use them in the West

Long John Brass
Coat

Re: Cool... err say what?

So all I have to do is to live on slave wages, give up any ridiculous notions I may have of human dignity, the right to a fair trial or even the right to read a book of my choosing and I can use QR codes?

They use QR codes in the USofA?

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Kotkin on who made Trump and Brexit: Look in the mirror, it's you

Long John Brass
Coat

Re: Really?

Apart from workers rights, human rights, a free trade bloc, a free travel zone, a more stable Europe, and who could forget... cheaper roaming charges! Then there was the (arguably) greater economic stability. And intangibles such as being part of a European community.

Yeah but apart from that what have the Romans EU ever done for us?

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SETI mulls reboot: Believing the strangest things, loving the alien

Long John Brass
Alien

Step 1.

Step 1 Find life

Step 2 Find intelligent life

Step 3: ???

Step 4: Profit

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Linux on PS3 white flag

Long John Brass
Linux

Here is an idea

When $company decides to drop support for $hardware; they are then legally obliged to open the $hardware platform.

wailing and gnashing of teeth in 3, 2 1....

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Should we teach our kids how to program humanity out of existence?

Long John Brass
FAIL

I for one welcome our new machine overlords

Given the choice between uber klop sturm fuhrer Trump and the kill all humans AI; I choose the AI.

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Long John Brass

Re: "a massive drain on my television-watching time"

Vision-On was also a favourite :)

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The Sons of Kahn and the Witch of Wookey

Long John Brass

Re: "Maketh My Teeth Hurt Just Reading This"

Gesundheit

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Label your cables: A cautionary tale from the server room

Long John Brass

RE: Label your cables: A cautionary tale from the server room

Bwhahaha....

I only laugh because I too have been there

Remember years ago after been asked to diagnose a twitchy Solaris machine + software; System was running some mission critical financial app, so I thought to myself, Hey I have an bradn spanking new identical machine sitting right next to it that wasn't in use just yet (and wouldn't even get an install for another week), I will restore the back to THAT machine and start poking around to see why ${mission_critical_server} was having the odd bad hair day...

Nearly had a heart attach when during a reboot of the new "test" machine I saw the host name of said mission critical server fly past on the serial console.... A kind of "Oh shit which machine did I actually reboot? moment" Lucky for me it was the test machine, but still nearly shat myself :)

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Can ad biz’s LEAN avert ADPOCALYPSE?

Long John Brass
Paris Hilton

Re: Advertorials, etc

It haz wut plants crave

because electrolytes

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Love it or hate it, it's time for that Software Power Meeting again

Long John Brass

"It’s not like these fast-moving DevOps people are just shipping shitting code gleefully, they’re testing and reviewing at almost a nauseating level for old timers who enjoyed throwing the testing tasks over the wall to QA."

There fixed that for you

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You can always rely on the Ancient Ones to cock things up

Long John Brass
Devil

Blood Sacrifice

Back on the day when building PCs for myself or for $company

I found that the razor sharp, nay these things put cut throat razors to shame

would exact a not insignificant amount of blood as payment; these machines would always work fine. On the odd occasion where tired from the blood loss and looking like I'd lost a fight with a possessed helicopter made of razor wire, those machines would always have issues until the appropriate blood sacrifice was made.

The old gods always require payment and will not be satisfied until the bill is settled

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Router hackers reach for the fork: LEDE splits from OpenWRT

Long John Brass
Linux

Re: What we really need

You mean something like this

http://routerboard.com/products/group/11

or maybe this?

https://www.element14.com/community/community/dreamboard

I agree with you wish for an ADSL chipset OSS systems can talk to, maybe a USB modem of some sort?

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Google found 760,935 compromised web sites in a year

Long John Brass
Mushroom

Re: 760,935 breaches Google detected

Yes, that is because a windows box requires an admin 24/7 to keep rebooting it every time it hangs or crashes. A *nix box on the other hand will run for years without intervention and thus get lost and forgotten in the noise of day to day work.

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NZ Pastafarians joined in noodly wedlock

Long John Brass

Re: Please be careful how you mock.

> And I don't see anyone burning people alive in the name of Pastafarianism

Quite right we boil em, with a dash of salt.

Having said that, I myself am a Discordian Ninja.

All hail *ERIS*

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Neighbour sick of you parking in his driveway? You'd better hack-proof your car

Long John Brass
Coat

So what you're telling me is ...

That I now need an Anti Virus and Intrusion Detection System for my car

And how will the updates be delivered?

Ahhh from the Authorised dealers only, should have known

*sobs*

Kinda lost for words now ... The will to live failing ... The *rage* building ...

<coat> Mines the one with the tickets off this damned rock in it </coat>

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George Bush naked selfie hacker Guccifer gets his day in US court

Long John Brass
WTF?

"No matter where they are in the world, those who commit crimes against U.S. citizens will be held accountable for their actions, pursued by our investigators and prosecutors and brought to justice."

Meanwhile US "citizens" can do whatever the fuck they like as long as its not in the USofA cus it's not our jurisdiction.

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Here's a great idea: Let's make a gun that looks like a mobile phone

Long John Brass
Mushroom

This from a country...

That makes it illegal to cross a road unless at appropriately marked areas with signs, lights and painted sections of tarmac , cus people can't be trusted to look both ways.

But firearms of all kinds? Yeah , no worries.

These people have nukes...

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NASA discovers black hole here on Earth – in its software budget

Long John Brass

I'll do it myself for $100 million

Just make the cheque out to cash

Only half joking, for that sort of cash I'm sure I could build up a team, then do the bloody thing from scratch.

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Cunning scam: Mobe app stalks victims then emails booby-trapped bogus speeding tickets

Long John Brass
Terminator

Nice to see

That someone on the internet has an actual business model

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Linus Torvalds wavers, pauses … then gives the world Linux 4.5

Long John Brass

Re: Steady as she goes

Yup - The latest rev of KDE makes me very very sad

Looking for a non-gnome replacement, but ...

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Obama puts down his encrypted phone long enough to tell us: Knock it off with the encryption

Long John Brass
Devil

Here's a thought...

Given how devout the US Clergy Politicians present themselves to be

If you need to decipher something ask ${deity} for the key, If ${deity} gives you the correct key the person was ${evil} if not they're innocent

Simples

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Behold, Microsoft SQL Server on Linux – and a firm screw-you to Oracle

Long John Brass
Headmaster

DB2 for the win?

Damnit, where did I put those FoxPro diskettes

Powerbuilder maybe?

<Icon=oldFart>

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GCHQ: Crypto's great, we're your mate, don't be like that and hate

Long John Brass

Re: Goodwill GCHQ ?

Goodwill?

<voice=blade_runner_narrator>

The various government organs have burned through whatever little goodwill they had left

Overreaching councils snooping on your bins or police "just checking up" on neighbours, ex wives/husbands. Security agencies drag-netting all cell & internet comms (but its ok cuz it only meta data)

All because the ${badGuys} and ${boogyMen} will get us.... Won't somebody think of the ${emotionalHotButton}

</voice>

Mines the one with the meds in the pocket

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Microsoft joins Eclipse Foundation. Odd thing for a competitor to do

Long John Brass

Re: Oh. Woo. Yay.

I'm old enough to remember when IBM was the evil monster that all and sundry went out to slay.

MS in those days were the plucky upstart, my how things have changed.

And will again no doubt.

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Blah Blah blah ... I don't care! To hell with your tech marketing bull

Long John Brass

Re: @Long John Brass - I can haz electrolytes

> Only after you manage to get the rest of the operations team fired.

Out of a cannon? Or will a stint in the tape safe do?

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Long John Brass

I can haz electrolytes

Because DevOps

So If I read that right, If I implement Puppet/SaltStack/etc a dash of source control to manage my infrastructure, then I'm a DevOps not a SysAdmin any more?

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Microsoft has made SQL Server for Linux. Repeat, Microsoft has made SQL Server 2016 for Linux

Long John Brass

> they tend to come from someone trying to run a big DB on inappropriate hardware

With sufficient thrust pigs fly just fine

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Mountains of madness found on Pluto's Cthulhu Regio

Long John Brass
Thumb Up

This pleases me more than I would like to admit

“a mountain range located in southeast Cthulhu that’s 260 miles (420 kilometres) long.”

South-east Cthulu?! This is a place!?

Just too awesome for words

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Raspberry Pi celebrates fourth birthday with fruity version 3

Long John Brass

Re: Whichever way you slice it

@Someone_Somewhere

> there isn't enough RAM to do anything sensible with it

Oh I don't know, I have one Model2 running the SimpleMetal printer via OctoPrint and an old 256MB modelB running SimH which runs RSTS, RSX11, rt11 and VaxVMS

That is 3 PDP/11's and a VAX off one old ras-pi

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Long John Brass
Joke

Re: programmable means i can use itself to program it

@BurnT'offering

> So I can't interest you in some fresh punch cards?

Why yes, that would be marvellous!

I'll take two decks please

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Your xenophobia is killing us, Silicon Valley warns US Congress

Long John Brass

It's a brave new world...

We've always been at war with Eurasia Eastasia

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European Space Agency lights up new Australian antenna

Long John Brass

Re: New Norcia

I thought it was where you found norcs... The nice ones at any rate :)

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TTIP: A locked room, no internet access, two hours, 300 pages and lots of typos

Long John Brass
Black Helicopters

Welcome

Welcome EUisians to the the hell that the APACians are living in.

One day Corporatism will be mentioned in the same section of the dictionary as Fascism, Communism etc under the section that reads "Turns out THAT was a bad idea" or "-Ism's in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an -ism, he should believe in himself."

But until then I for one welcome our new corporate overlords... Oh hell who am I kidding.

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Private clouds kinda suck, you know?

Long John Brass

Re: Also Confused

> So what's a private cloud then? Someone else's computer that you own?

Yes, exactly

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Long John Brass

Re: Also Confused

> Perhaps a definition of "Cloud" might be useful?

Cloud = someone else's computer

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Australian astroboffins reveal hundreds of hidden galaxies

Long John Brass

Check my math

So that means we are travelling towards this thing at %18.5 the speed of light?

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Puppet CEO: No hype in DevOps... except for the overhyped bits

Long John Brass

Re: Containers are great...

They are good for smaller environments too

The ability to spin up a server that looks & plays the same, first time every time is not to be underestimated

And the amount of work is not that evil either; A bit of a learning curve, but not too painful

Start with the easiest, parts, prove it to yourself, then start adding bits until you can burn down the OS and spin up a new one with having to manually twiddle bits to make it work.

That is the thing about decent config management there is not THAT much difference between an estate that has ~20 machines, ~200 machines or ~2000 machines

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Let's play immutable infrastructure! A game where 'crash and burn' works both ways

Long John Brass

Happy middle ground

Use Salt/Puppet/etc to build and manage your OS image.

This includes patching, logging should be to central loghost anyway

If the host become badly borked due to a cockup or intrusion; burn it down & get the config management to rebuilt it for you.

I would advocate for burning down & rebuilding dev/test/qa systems on a semi-regular basis

Helps keep the cruft levels down

simples

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Brit boffins get green light to edit human genome

Long John Brass

Ethics

People should have the choice to employ this tech for themselves or their children

Corporations and Governments should not under any circumstances get to have a say

Yes some Muppets will engineer an elf lord, but it's better than worker done #12-345-678

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Safe Harbor ripped and replaced with Privacy Shield in last-minute US-Europe deal

Long John Brass

no taxation without representation

The rest of the world now demands a vote.

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How to build a starship - and why we should start thinking about it now

Long John Brass

Re: Coms

MechJeb could do it

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Whew! How to tell if a DevOps biz is peddling a load of manure

Long John Brass

washed up bunch of sysadmins and DBAs

> A washed up bunch of sysadmins and DBAs who thinks they know how the finer points of operations should work in the 21st Century

And that's the attitude most Devs seem to have of OPs teams. Fine by me, give em root & put em on call

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'Unikernels will send us back to the DOS era' – DTrace guru Bryan Cantrill speaks out

Long John Brass
Flame

total lack of operational empathy

Welcome to DevOps

Put the little fuckers on call.

<rant>

These retards are saying, get these heavy bloated OS syscalls out of our way!; They slow us down!

Really? You create 100k objects templates & each has its own constructor/destructor baked in that does sweet fuck all except chew processor time, and they have the gall to moan about the ring transition time/context switch, the solution? Moar garbage collection, and get rid of the OS, No ... just no.

My code is slow, blame the database, blame the OS, blame the network, blame the OPS guys, blame the sysadmins. any ones fault but my own....

Fuckemall; put them on call and let them deal with the angry screaming hordes.

</rant>

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