210 posts • joined 7 Apr 2008
I helped to clean the London Flat after a certain boffin had vacated the tenancy. It is obviously very easy to leave human traces behind ;-)
Does that mean...?
We set the price too high.
So I can have a Zapper to set a speed limit on the car behind that is tailgating me on the motorway/freeway?
Give him the latest iPad
The poor chap is misunderstood. They should give him the latest top end iPad and release him. One small condition of release is that it should be on Henderson Island with no boat.
Even Version Number
I've learned long ago, never buy an even numbered version of Microsoft Windows. Look back over their history.
MS gather a good team of developers to create an odd numbered version which sells well and meets public demand. Those developers are then either promoted out of the way or sidelined by the next brood of young turks/suits who "develop" the next major release (even numbered) which turns out to be a lemon. The survivors are in place to fix their design errors/lessons learned while working on the next (odd numbered) major release.
Never did like 'em
I always found the HP people arrogant and their tin overpriced. Now they want to charge you for fixing their duff firmware. This announcement is further confirmation.
No Sern you have only just been given a new toy. Play with that. We are not going to buy you a new one now.
Not a lovely Dell
The last time I dealt with Dell was when one of their direct sales team tried to bribe me to place a large order through them rather than the distributor with whom I transacted the business. The person involved had a less than perfect grasp of the english language that matched his lack of ethics. The order was for hundreds of desk top PCs.
Since then I've received half hearted attempts from junior Dell Sales staff via email and phone calls to re-establish contact. Once again these people sound as though they are located thousands of miles from me on the other side of the globe. These unfortunate individuals appear to be scraping the bottom of the CRM barrel with little success. They certainly give me no confidence of a reliable sales/supply process.
Dell do not seem to know the difference between "cheap" and "inexpensive"!
Micro$oft internal politics
Once again Micro$oft shafts its users. Probably due to internal politics rather than deliberate.
A good move by the Oz government. All we need now is for some of the UK MPs to also develop some cojones and to stand up to Adobe et al for the British public.
I've found Google Docs does just fine for me. As a personal user the cost is zero including a reasonable amount of on-line storage. I just don't need the MS Office Bloatware with its hundreds of unwanted bells and whistles.
Campaign for e-free flights
I fly on business an awful lot. It is a great time to catch up on sleep or to read the book I've been meaning to read. The last thing I need is to be pestered with emails and calls from people who don't really need an immediate response.
Businesses should be set up to cope with absences of their personnel. I've learned to fly with just a mobile phone (switched off before entering plane) and a Red & Black notebook, this deals with pretty much any situation. If I need a PC at the other end I borrow one and download any necessary file or remotely access my office PC. There's less risk of loss and you don't waste your time tinkering with a Laptop or Tablet. If there's something desperately urgent people can call my mobile phone and talk to me when I've landed.
By all means have mobile phones and internet access on planes but impose a substantial extra fee to deter all but the most essential communication. For example $10 minute or part thereof as a UN tax used to help the digital 3rd world.
Skype was a stella purchase by one of the cast members.
I'm just reading http://tech.fortune.cnn.com/2012/05/08/500-hp-apotheker/ it is a bit long, but quite an expose of the Dark Princes on the HP Board. Does the term necrophilia apply to this situation?
They've got previous...
EDS, Palm, Compaq, DEC, Tandem, Skype
Undertaker Project Manager
An amusing typo on LinkedIn job advert from Sagepay.
They're looking for a person who knows about: "Undertaker Post Implementation reviews and ensure each lesson learned has an action and action owner" - Is this a case of failure not tolerated?
How would the vulture react
... if the Government launched a major technology project without seeking any expert advice?
When you are in a hole stop digging
But Apple's PR team seem to have placed an order for a large tunnel boring machine to ensure they go really deep.
While I realise the young lady needs to protect her modesty, allowing a Burmese Python to totally encircle her neck is a bit risqué. Fortunately though there is a coffin conveniently placed in the room.
Refuse to apologise...
..and get fired! Surely with the maps fiasco Apple would know it is better to apologise properly and let the issue die down. With their demonstrated contempt of the British courts they have guaranteed their reputation will be further damaged. It is about time Tim Cook earned his mega bucks by SMACKING a few heads in his management team to get their attention.
The Adobe Acrobat XI is still price 25% higher (allowing for VAT and exchange rates) in the UK over the equivalent USA price, even for download software. I wonder who are the real pirates here! Not that it affects me, I've switched to Nitro PDF which is a third of the price for full functionality.
Same old, same old...
Ho hum - the now classic adage comes to mind.
"Never buy an even numbered version of the Windows operating system"
The VP speaks pure marketing.
A new Minister in a plush office bounced into making a dumb decision by "Sir Humphrey" on her first day at the big "school".
Just wait for the fuss when these poorly designed and ugly boxes start littering planning conservation areas. In our locality BT installed telegraph poles across the local recreation ground where the kids play football in order to supply one building. They put up notices on the poles describing the "appeals process" as an afterthought (essentially no hope of appeal).
It's not what you know but who...
Of course people really in the know about professional networks don't use LinkedIn. They use the other genuinely influential network ...
I was on the phone...
"I was on the phone chatting to a friend about the war in the South China Seas. He was worried in case the Royal Navy became involved when suddenly the UK's BT 21CN telephone and broadband total failure suddenly interrupted the call..."
An impossible scenario with all the PLA backed HUAWEI equipment at the heart of our telecoms infrastructure?
Arrgh!! No! don't do that to me.
"...Perhaps you could use some different-coloured pens...." That phrase sent a cold shiver down my spine. I've heard the exact same phrase used by the Consultant Project Manager on a major project for a large City money broking firm. The project was a horrendous failure. The charm of BOFH is a bit like Dilbert, it is so close to real life! Unfortunately in real life we're not allowed to use Semtex as a motivational tool.
Not just USA spooks
Or even the Russian Intelligence getting access to Skype http://oaksys.blogspot.co.uk/2011/06/russia-to-get-access-to-skype.html
Never buy an even numbered version of Windows...
I've always found it helpful to bypass even numbered releases of Microsoft operating systems. Version 8 is just the same, they produced a good release with Windows 7 then kind of lost their way. History repeats itself.
Time for flash mob?
60 cyborg look-alikes descend and order poule-balls avec frites in the branch of a well known fast food chain in Paris.
Buy power meters?
I can visualize the bean counter or spreadsheet manager.: "Install power monitoring equipment and software to keep track of the energy budget? That sounds expensive... why on earth would we need that? Surely what we have now works just fine."
All these young scallywags need is a six month spell as conscripts to the Army. A spell of cold showers at 6a.m. and parade square bashing under a Drill Sergeant Major will soon buck up their ideas. IT not a good career? Harrumph, they just want life on easy street.
Somewhere in RBS there is a list of names of the people who decided to offshore the daily batch control work to the cheapest operations staff. These people didn't ensure these cheap offshore operators were properly trained and had proper controls in place.
These people should be fired including the senior managers at the top of the chain who insisted on unsafe cost cutting.
The cost to the bank in terms of reputation loss and recovery will be enormous, far exceeding any savings made by going cheap. Has RBS properly evaluated the real cost impact of laying waste to its technology human capital in the UK?
Has its managers changed the support teams from people who care about their work to those who just regard it as a job to earn low wages while working awful hours? That might be okay at the counter of a fast food store but not in a key business team.
How to comment bank program code
Hey Boss how can I help it?
is almost the same as:
Would that be a data centre located a few hundred metres from the Buncefield fuel terminal? If it is, it makes risk assessment an interesting proposition.
Never thought I'd say this
Thank God for LINUX. Just imagine how bad Micro$oft's greed would be if there was no strong competitor. It is bad enough now.
Bypass the paper system
Just go out and buy some physical gold. It is much more difficult for the Banking establishment to tinker with the value by devaluation or quantitative easing (printing money).
I was head hunted to work as an IT Manager for competitors in the City of London financial markets. My resignation was on the whole a good natured thing, but they required me to work my 3 months notice period as "gardening leave" with the twist that had to be on their premises, but not my own office. The rational was that they didn't want me to have access to confidential information during my notice period and didn't want me to do any work for my new employers during gardening leave. The process entailed turning up on the Director's floor each morning, finding a seat somewhere and reading a book all day. It was very boring but a good natured process.
The unintended consequence was the secretaries of the Directors used to ask me to visit their desks to help sort out spreadsheet and word processing problems on documents they were preparing for their bosses. I learned a lot more confidential information about the company and its plans in those three months than I'd ever seen in the previous five years of employment. The City of London is a small place though, so I never breached that unintended confidence.
Tsk, Tsk Anonymous Coward #1. I've always found the WD consumer disks to be extremely relia...
Al Shabaab Submarine
Maybe those pesky Somali's have obtained a wire cutter attached submarine?
Eggs in one basket?
The large manufacturers should not be blaming the floods for the disk shortage. Rather they should be blaming themselves for sourcing their just-in-time suppliers in one location on a flood plain to boot. Management by spreadsheet seems so appealing until things go wrong.
Oh no, I won't buy a ticket.
I'd best not buy a lottery ticket on the day when the failed craft plunges to the earth's surface. Knowing my luck I'll be holding the jackpot winning ticket in my hand just as a chunk of the satellite takes me out.
So they've fixed....
So they've fixed the reliability issues for the 365 service?
Osborne has a difficult job trying to deal with the absolute economic disaster left by the Gordon Brown Labour government. The man who loosened the reins on the bankers and failed to control their reckless casino banking. Sorry but it was bleedingly obvious that such derivative trading was pure gambling? The same man who sold off the Gold reserves, raided pensions, encouraged PFIs and lost control of Govt spending. If Brown had any common sense he'd have invested the 3G licence auction windfall of £20 Billion on getting the homes in this country optically fibered.
Whenever I read of a spokesman announcing that they are "working hard to..." I dump the statement in the same bin that I would use for "lessons will be learned..."
"Working hard" is a meaningless annoying statement. I'm sure the technicians dealing with the problem have decided to go home, put their feet up and deal with it on Monday - NOT.
Its already been invented so it is Prior Art. Wanna see my man cannon mister?
Lean Management soaked by floods
Ah good ole Justin Thyme strikes again. When Justin catches a cold we all suffer. Didn't Acer learn any lessons from Toyota and the last big Earthquake/Tsunami.
Justin Thyme is a cheap efficient employee until things go worng.
I wonder if the Kremlin/FSB will get its set of the Skype encryption master keys as part of the deal. Wasn't that something the local Microsoft russian bigwig mention a few months ago?
I was hanging on every word
He is sooo credible, just like the 16 y/o son of a failed property developer. Ed was fortunate that technology took pity on him.
I moved into the Financial Markets in an IT role in 1985. Even then it was obvious that arbitrage was not investment. The Tobin Tax would have little impact on genuine investment banking which generally involves investing large sums of money infrequently for long term results. The bulk of the high frequency trading and arbitrage is not investment merely speculation/gambling, i.e. only the traders/brokers gain at a cost to the greater public. Taxing on a per transaction basis will help to restore some order.
I moved my savings into physical gold to protect them when I realised that the "wizards" couldn't play with its value. When Gordon Brown decided selling the gold was a sensible idea I knew it was time to act.
Reliable software/Reliable Service
It seems the Office 365 service operation has inherited its design ethos from the original Microsoft software.
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