* Posts by Fatman

1565 posts • joined 6 Apr 2008

Mounties nab Canadian woman, 27, in webcam hack shenanigans bust

Fatman
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RE: a bad prank

Put her in a cell and put the key somewhere nice and safe for a while weld the fucking door shut.

FTFY!!!

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Tesla reveals Powerwall battery packs for homes, Powerpacks for cities

Fatman
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Re: 4,192 KWh

Some states like Florida get so much it beggars belief that solar isn't the primary source of power.

There is a simple answer: A Bought and Paid For State Legislature

SHIT, we are still paying for a nuke plant that will NEVER be built.

http://www.tampabay.com/news/business/energy/duke-energy-to-cancel-proposed-levy-county-nuclear-plant-fasano-says/2134287

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Who thinks Microsoft Edge SUCKS? Erm, Microsoft

Fatman
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Re: Edge Logo

SHIT!!!!

Here I thought that Microsoft would use something more descriptive of the informal name many have given to IE - Internet ExploDer.

How's this for an icon:

http://fc07.deviantart.net/fs50/i/2009/336/5/2/Mushroom_Cloud_by_Wittman80.jpg

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Boeing 787 software bug can shut down planes' generators IN FLIGHT

Fatman
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Joke

Re: from memory

A vanilla install of Windows NT (tm) with no patch or network connection ( nor keyboard or mouse, btw) would self crash after 248 days...

So THAT is what those GCU's are running on????

You would think a company like Boeing could use a newer version of the O/S???

</sarcasm>

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Fatman
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WTF?

Re: So...Garbage from Non-Aviators

Both the programmer team and the test team should be in front of the leather top desk :-) taken out behind the woodshed, and...(you fill in the blank)

FTFY

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Today, the US govt must explain why its rules on shutting down whole cell networks are a secret

Fatman
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Re: Baltimore...

Any evidence this was used there?

Damn good question.

Cops just HATE it when you can shed light on their violating your civil rights. After all, "if you did nothing wrong..." only works when it is in THEIR favor.

WRT the looting, pillaging and burning of homes and businesses; I hate to say this, but that is completely counter-productive. "Throwing your toys out of the pram" (I hope I have it right) is not conducive to getting your point across; it merely gets you dismissed as a bunch of anarchists.

The cops DO NEED to be sent a message - one being that you can not expect to shit all over people on a regular basis, and not expect blowback. Much of what is going on in the USofA can be traced to the militarization of the police, and the use of SWAT tactics without good reason. When cops begin to act like thugs with badges, they lose ALL respect.

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ServiceMesh man Eric Pulier resigns from CSC amid bribery claims

Fatman
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So???

Pulier left after it was revealed he allegedly paid bribes to executives at Australia's Commonwealth Bank

In MANY parts of the world, such payments (often called bribes) are considered 'good business practices". In the "Land of the Free" (aka the USofA) the same practice is called campaign contributions; and since the SCOTUS has decreed that Corporations have "Free Speech Rights", their campaign contributions do a lot of talking.

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Imation board and CEO get desperate ahead of May 20 AGM

Fatman
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Poor Shareholders...

YOU elected this BoD, so collectively, you have no one to blame but yourselves.

The smart shareholders who did see the handwriting on the wall sold out already!!!

The wiser amongst you will put in an inquiry to the Clinton Group, and determine if they are interested in guying you out, after which it will no longer be your headache. With enough shares owned outright, and sufficient proxy votes, then the Clinton Group can send Imation's maximizing shareholder value Damagers on their way. That would be good riddance.

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Watch out for the products that have snuck in behind your back

Fatman
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RE: Bypassing IT (especially when you are a part of IT)

Having bypassed my own IT department I can now surprise my business users by delivering software next month rather than the next year or never delivery date they have come to expect.

You can thank $DEITY that you do NOT work for my employer, because my boss would have stuffed your ass into the Trebuchet sling, and sent you on a new career trajectory!

Cow boys like you can work elsewhere!

It is bad enough that IT must deal with the sales weasels who always try to get ShIT past us, but to have one of our own do it; that is unforgivable. Here is your PINK SLIP. DO NOT allow the door to hit you on your way out!

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Watch: Nasty JPEG pops corporate locks on Windows boxes

Fatman
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Re: So he did a live hack into a government server?

I bet he is learning new stress positions at Club Gitmo, courtesy of the Land of the Free Government Bought and Paid For by Special Interests.

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Apple will cut down 36,000 acres of forest in 'conservation scheme'

Fatman
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Joke

Re: Isn't this just supply chain control?

However, I know the hip business triend is to outsource everything except for including the executives and build a business on a massive tower clusterfuck of interlocked contracts with suppliers.

You made a mistake, I fixed it.

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Target settles with MasterCard for US$19 million

Fatman
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Re: It's a sad statement...

I wonder how much they've spent on improving their security?

But that doesn't lead to increased shareholder value.

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2550100 ... An Illuminati codeword or name of new alliance demanding faster Ethernet faster?

Fatman
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FAIL

Re: Remember 56K?

You mean as opposed to the result of robbed-bit signaling used with channel-associated signaling T1s? Yeah, sure.

Another one who has a better understanding of communications standards that the poster (s)he was replying to. Perhaps he ought to read up on T1 standards:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/T-carrier

And for the lazy among us (the "money" part):

The optimum bit rate was chosen empirically—the capacity was increased until the failure rate was unacceptable, then reduced to leave a margin. Companding allowed acceptable audio performance with only seven bits per PCM sample in this original T1/D1 system. The later D3 and D4 channel banks had an extended frame format, allowing eight bits per sample, reduced to seven every sixth sample or frame when one bit was "robbed" for signaling the state of the channel. The standard does not allow an all zero sample which would produce a long string of binary zeros and cause the repeaters to lose bit sync. However, when carrying data (Switched 56) there could be long strings of zeros, so one bit per sample is set to "1" (jam bit 7) leaving 7 bits × 8,000 frames per second for data.

ICON for the original poster not the person I replied to ---------------------------------->

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Verizon to world: STOP opening dodgy phishing emails, FOOLS

Fatman
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Re: Scrappers

My WROK PALCE had one such scrapper who was a low level IT flunky.

He thought that the machines being re-cycled were going to be sold.

He did not know that they were leased, and re-cycling them meant returning them to the leasing company; who was none too happy to get 50 of them back minus the RAM.

Cue one nastygram from a shyster. Fortunately for him, he had not 'disposed' of those chips; and we were able to return them.

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Linux 4.0 debuts with the usual no fanfare

Fatman
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Joke

Re: Figures…

Pretty soon the only thing requiring a re the boot after update will be systemd...

FTFY!!

(One could only wish!)

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HOT HOVERSHIP-ON-HOVERSHIP ACTION: SpaceX ready for barge boing

Fatman
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Third time "a charm"?

One could only hope.

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Everything's code, 'zero tolerance for assholes': Yup, it's ChefConf

Fatman
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Re: Cute...

...except "zero tolerance for assholes" is basically meaningless without a precise definition of what constitutes one.

But, for many, you must include the term manglement in front of asshole and then you clarify the definition.

On another note, hey ElReg, how about a "manglement asshole" icon. You COULD use a picture of one of the more enduring assholes of the last 25 years - Steve Ballmer, (others might recommend Steve Jobs instead) as a starting point.

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Fatman
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RE: zero tolerance for assholes.

If Jim The Boss' WROK PALCE (if you are not a reader of Shark Tank, then this will fly over your head) really had a zero tolerance for assholes; they would have taken JTB out and would have had him shot a long time ago.

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Microsoft uses Windows Update to force Windows 10 ads onto older PCs

Fatman
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Re: "The scheme could backfire."

This carries the same stench that the (now roundly hated) WGA1 update had upon unsuspecting Windows XP users.

It looks like Microsoft is back to its old tricks.

1 The acronym 'WGA' is defined by me to mean: "We're Greedy Assholes", not "Windows Genuine Advantage".

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Idiot thieves walk free after stolen iPad uploads pics of them with loot

Fatman
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Re: The punishment

the real question is which would be most effective in getting the criminal to engage with society correctly?

A THOUSAND lashes with the whip, administered at a rate of 20 per day, each day, until the sentence is complete.

Those bitches will then get the message.

Sometimes I feel it would be better to administer 20 to 50 lashes in public than to lock them up for a year or so for some crimes.

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The Perez Peregrination: Invicta and the move to Dell

Fatman
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Re: ... one of the benefits of being privately run.

Another benefit is that you are out of the glare of the Wall Street ANALysts, and their incessant harping about "increased shareholder value".

Privately run also means that you know EXACTLY WHOSE ass you must kiss.

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Are you sure there are servers in this cold, dark basement?

Fatman
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Re: New Installment

Sounds like a BOFH in the fold, are they taking one of Simon's pages?

A real bastard would have done some additional, inconspicuous damage - like short the pairs together in some hard to find location. Imagine the blue wire from one cable being cross circuited to the orange-white of a different cable altogether? Try figuring that one out.

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Fatman
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Joke

Manglement strikes again.

I'd say the complete lack of lighting in the "server room" was a good clue that they're running on a shoestring and cutting every possible expense.

But, we have to increase shareholder value!!!

Icon says it all.

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Is this what Windows XP's death throes look like?

Fatman
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Joke

Re: Oh wow...

Oh here we go, the penguinistas coming out defending their OS. ...

I didn't know that ElReg allowed YOU to comment here, Loverock Davidson?

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Energy utilities targeted by Office-spawned recon attack tool

Fatman
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FAIL

Re: Security, ... you need a slight correction

The big question is, why if small companies can do this type of security why can't large ones? It is not difficult but it does require thought which seems to be sadly lacking in senior typical of SENILE management today.

FTFY!!!!

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BOFH: Never mind that old brick, look at this ink-stained BEAUTY

Fatman
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Re: when it was vital that your keyboard would still work

I have an old Fujitsu one, built back in the days when it was vital that your keyboard would still work after using it to beat someone to death.

A good sturdy keyboard is an effective tool at getting manglement's attention.

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BOFH: Mmm, gotta love me some fresh BYOD dog roll

Fatman
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The Boss' comments

"DEVICE! BRING YOUR OWN DEVICE DAY! WHO THE HELL WOULD HAVE A BRING YOUR OWN DRINK DAY?!"

YOU would if you just bought a company that is a Windows shop, and you are NOT. Even worse, if that Windows version bore a strong resemblance to a child's toy.

"I'm just ... encouraging ... you to think of the company's spend,” purrs the Boss. “If we save money here we'll have it to spend in other areas. You'll be able to get something you really like. We will have an even larger pool for the executive bonuses at the end of the year"

When it comes down to:

shiny new kit, or

executive bonus money,

my money is always on the shiny new kit. You can have that old 1133mHz P3 with only 512Mb of RAM. I want NEED the latest core i7 with 16GB of RAM, and fuck you if you can't take a joke!!!

BTW, my boss heads out for a 5 week vacation starting on the 28th (lots of 'use-it-or-lose-it' comp time). Somehow, someway her signature is going to appear on a purchase order for some shiny-shiny.. By the time she gets back, well, it will be just too late to return said shiny-shiny. If it does hit the fan, then the prime motivator will just blackmail coerce trick convince the beancounters it is in THEIR best interest NOT to piss off IT; lest they experience the pain of having the switch ports reconfigured to 10Mb HALF duplex (instead of the current 1Gb full duplex).

"I can't understand HOW that happened. We can't help you until the boss gets back, as there is IT policy that prevents us from tampering with the switch configuration without her explicit approval., So sorry." (said with a straight face)

April will be a fun month.

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Sit back and let someone else manage your telephony

Fatman
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FAIL

RE: disasters waiting to happen

In similar vein, I've seen companies move to a cloud-based L.O.B. application but choose not to install a backup Internet connection (again, against strong advice) and then loose their minds when their Internet link goes down because of a stuff up with the provider which takes '5 business days' to rectify. It was, apparently, a 'disaster' but one they were warned about well ahead of time. They just didn't want to pay to have a line sitting there, unused. A thousand dollars a year going to waste, apparently.

Typical BEAN COUNTER and MAXIMIZE SHAREHOLDER VALUE mentality.

The punishment for these ignorant pricks ought to be a Trebuchet ride for the manglers involved (i. e. launching them on a NEW CAREER PATH)

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NORK internet outage was payback for Sony hack – US politician

Fatman
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RE: Well lets speculate, shall we ??

You forgot one:

....The military-industrial complex needs to keep tensions high in the world in order to sell product stock the arsenal of freedom.

Eisenhower was right....(for those of you who slept through their History classes: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Military%E2%80%93industrial_complex )

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Zombie SCO shuffles back into court seeking IBM Linux cash

Fatman
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Mushroom

RE: It's April 1st somewhere.

I thought SCO was a liquidated corpse,

You are not alone.

SCO seems to live on.

Hell, you could bury its corpse in the busted reactor at Chernobyl, and the motherfucker would rise from the dead.

Somehow, I think the only way to rid the world of this zombie is to encase it in concrete, load it aboard a capsule and fire the dammed thing into the sun.

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This ISN'T Net Neutrality. This is Net Google. This is Net Netflix – the FCC's new masters

Fatman
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Coat

Re: So the FCC set up a fight between ...

... the Telephants - ... makes me wonder.......

Guys in blue-gray suits carrying suitcases of money, driving luxury cars with telco employee ID stickers and Romney 2012 RMoney 2012 bumper stickers.

Now, that imagery certainly hits the mark.

Hey ElReg, can we get a suitcase full of money icon???? This one will have to do for now-------------->

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Microsoft RE-BORKS Windows 7 patch after reboot loop horror

Fatman
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FAIL

Re: No issues here... you do not dual boot using GRUB.

I wonder.....

if this patch, like many other things Microsoft, assumes that Windows WindblowZE is the ONLY installed operating system. This would not be the first time a MS update borked GRUB.

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Stuxnet Redux: Microsoft patches Windows vuln left open for FIVE YEARS

Fatman
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FAIL

Re: Just a reminder of how CMM 5 organisations handle failure.

I'm sure we all have our opinions which of these MS will actually do.

Mine: None of the above!!

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Microsoft unveils API to break hardware/software coupling in switches

Fatman
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Joke

Re: Isn't that Windows?

I can't wait for a Microsoft O/S for switch silicon.......

Just imagine the shit flying when it BSoD's.

PHB: "The fucking network is dead!!!"

PFY: "I have to reboot the switch because it BSoD'ed"

PHB: "Well, WHO told you to buy that shit?"

PFY: "You did, asshole!!!

Now where is Simon to arrange for a 'lift accident'?

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Wi-Fi beam-steering tech could KILL OFF fixed home networks

Fatman
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Are you missing a tag?

What does the speed of your internal network have to do with the speed of your external connection?

I was wondering, did you forget the <sarcasm> tag???

The other alternative is that you have a limited experience with networking, and you have failed to realize that if one is streaming video from an external connection, if it has less throughput than your internal network, it WILL be a limiting factor.

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Fatman
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FAIL

Re: Fixed networks are harder to mess with....

... the more traffic I can keep in a cable, the better.

I feel the same way, but, I have constant battles with the manglement types who want mobility (often that means not having to plug an Ethernet cable into the conference room switch).

One of these days, one of them will completely piss me off, and I will break into his laptop and royally fuck it up just to prove the point

They just cannot understand that wireless is another way of saying RADIO.

Fucking IDIOTS!!!

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Lenovo to customers: We only just found out about this Superfish vuln – remove it NOW

Fatman
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Linux

Re: Orange Alert!

NOOOOOOO!!!!!

It is BROWN STUFF alert (as in the substance hitting the fan).

This incident only makes it clear that any IT department worth its salt would:

1) wipe the OEM preload with their own image, or

2) nuke the goddamn thing from orbit and put Linux on it - a better (IMHO) solution, assuming that one isn't LOCKED into the WindblowZE platform.

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For pity's sake, you FOOL! DON'T UPGRADE it will make it WORSE

Fatman
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Re: they are an IT company

The trick for me, was to point out that BCP and DR plans invariably relied on restoring the IT infrastructure, and to ask what plans we had for working indefinitely without IT support.

Any company that can't function without it's IT base needs to bear that in mind.

Of course this will run counter to the shareholders pressure to offshore, outsource, and diminish. But the sudden realisation that IT is a critical infrastructure should give you scope to include such things in your risk register. With reference to the spectacular consequences (RBS et all) of failing.

But you can't do that as it does not increase shareholder value.

Secondly, manglement would not care one bit about DR and business continuity because they are quite likely to be gone before the shit hits the fan. it is the girls and boys in the trenches that have to worry about such things. They are going to be the ones that will have to clean up the mess left by the `Seagulls`.

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Hellooo, NSA? The US State Department can't kick hackers out of its networks – report

Fatman
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Joke

Re: They use Windows

And if they wipe every piece, the replacements new from the factory will come with exploits preinstalled and the first one will propagate through the network contaminating everything again within seconds of being switched on. It is hopeless.

Sony has the same problem. Actually, everybody who uses Windows does.

I couldn't agree more!!!!

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Received surprise new Redmond licenses? You might be pwned

Fatman
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Linux

"Surprise" Redmond licenses...

What difference does it make?

IF you use the operating system that comes from that global operating system monopoly, you are already infected with malware!!!!!!

</snark!>

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$10,000 Ethernet cable promises BONKERS MP3 audio experience

Fatman
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Re: Speed of electrons

I can just imagine audiophools listening to their music with vacuum spaced ethernet cables while a pump chugs away to maintain the vacuum while connected to their vacuum tube (i.e. 'valve' for you Brits) amplifier.

FOOLS and their money are quickly parted!!!

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Linux 3.19 released for your computing pleasure

Fatman
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Re: I miss the old days

What next? I'm hoping for

4.x ... Microsoft abandons its own OS kernel, adopts Linux.

Choose any common expression of something that has a probability of less than 1 in 100 billion, and you have the chance of that happening. Just being realistic, here.

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Forget robo-butlers – ROBO-MAIDS! New hotel staffed by slave-droids

Fatman
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Re: Mechanoids

No, how about a Cherry 2000???

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0092746/

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Siemens sighs: SCADA bugs abound

Fatman
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Re: SCADA is only an issue when manglement runs[1] the network, instead of network engineers..

You have left out an important letter in this statement:

SCADA is only an issue when manglement runs[1] the network, instead of network engineers..

The corrected version (missing letter included) is:

SCADA is only an issue when manglement ruIns[1] the network, instead of network engineers..

There! better!

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Fatman
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Re: Yes, but that's not the point to learn from this

Before SCADA hardware was controlled over its own dedicated network which afforded some level of security (through obscurity) then some bright spark brain dead MBA looking to "Increase Shareholder Value" decided it would be a good idea to just to stick it all on TCP/IP connect this shit to the internet without a complete understanding of the ramifictions of such OPEN and UNSECURED ACCESS.

FTFY!!!

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SPITTLE SPATTER as America weighs into FCC net neut shoutgasm

Fatman
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Re: Blah, blah, fscking blah!

Hey man, I like your style!!!!!

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Comcast sued for – you guessed it – allegedly SCREWING OVER CUSTOMERS

Fatman
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Re: What I want to know is...

...why the U.S. government consumer protection agencies such as the Federal Trade Commission, the state attorneys general, the Federal Communications Commission and the Federal Consumer Credit Reporting authority have not prosecuted Comcast for the litany of documented violations of law?

Short answer: Campaign Contributions

WTF did you expect from a bought and paid for government?

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Mom and daughter SUE Comcast for 'smuggling' public Wi-Fi hotspot into their home

Fatman
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Re: Hope they win.

... who've bought into their VoIP service have found the cable modem contains a $35 battery which we have to replace ourselves at our cost when it fails in order to continue having phone service during a power outage! Their equiptment they should umaintain!

Which is why I told Verizon to Fuck Off when they tried to foist a FiOS upgrade on me. I had already heard about that one from a business acquaintance who got stung!

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Adobe and software pals haul Forever 21 to court over piracy allegations

Fatman
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WTF?

Forever 21 sued for pirating

What the hell do you expect????

After all, manglement is out to maximize shareholder value, and fuck companies like Adobe, etc.. who expect to get paid.

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Verizon posts WANTED poster for copper rustlers

Fatman
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Verizon's "copper thefts"

I find it somewhat incredible that Verizon is complaining about copper theft, since they are so eager to get rid of that copper once they have tricked suckered induced their customers into switching to FiOS. They also lament about 'cord cutters' (like me) who have given up a copper land line, and exclusively use a cell phone.

They must be awash in excess copper pars due to the 'cord cutters', and Verizon would have to pay to remove that old cable. (In my area some of that cable is nearly 70 years old,) I would not doubt that Verizon has in old, established service areas, some of that old paper insulated, lead sheathed cable that requires a bottle of nitrogen gas pressurizing the line in order to keep the water out. The continued use of this old plant requires a periodic visit by a Verizon maintenance technician to replenish the gas bottle.

These copper thieves are doing Verizon a favor in removing old antiquated cable from service, allowing Verizon to increase shareholder value by not having to pay the removal costs.

</snark>

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