* Posts by Zippy's Sausage Factory

137 posts • joined 12 Mar 2008

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Microsoft points at Skype, Lync: You two, in my office – right now

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

Microsoft have spent a lot of money acquiring the Skype name

You can bet the marketroids are going to want to use it.

And let's face it - "Lync" does sound a bit like a sexually transmitted disease. "I went down the doctors with a case of the lync yesterday" "What they give you, antibiotics gain?" "Yeah"

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NSA: 'Back doors are a bad idea, give us a FRONT door key'

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Coat

Re: Github

Booby traps are easily spotted. The nippes are a dead giveaway.

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TTIP: Protect our privacy in EU-US trade deal or ELSE, snarl MEPs

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Megaphone

Re: And...

TTIP will be ratified everywhere except the USA. But they will expect the other sides to stick to it rigorously, while completely ignoring it themselves.

The Extradition Act surely should show that America makes bi-lateral agreements so that it can lean on the other side to implement them and then ignore them at its end.

Entering into any sort of trade agreement with the USA is basically equivalent to giving the US government sovereignty over part of your legislation with nothing in return. That's been their position for the last I don't know how long and I've no doubt they will stick to it.

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Netflix teams with AWS to launch VHS-as-a-service

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Happy

Re: I used to rent lots of tapes

I used to rent Betamax tapes.

Well, my parents did. I just used to watch them.

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Encryption is the REAL threat – Head Europlod

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Down

Let's ban secure banking. Because that's going to pose no problems for anyone.

Seriously, this guy needs to be unemployed. Because he genuinely does not understand the nature of computer security. What he is suggesting would allow criminals carte blanche to steal, and there would be nothing EuroPol could do about it.

This statement proves that he is incapable of doing the job effectively. He shouldn't have this job - or any other job in law enforcement. Effective immediately. Career over. Welcome to the dole queue.

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El Reg uncages its truly demonic BOFH t-shirt

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Up

Still got mine from last time. Not sure how many times it has been washed but it still looks like new. Good times.

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'Why don't you buy from foreign sites?' asks Commish, snapping on the gloves

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Happy

Who ever thought Interflora would be touted as being from the future?

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Dutch Transport Inspectorate raid Uber's Amsterdam office

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I like not being murdered by psychos who can register themselves on some weird app as a faux taxi driver. That's why I like licences for taxi drivers, as they provide at least some guarantee that you've not been picked up by some random serial killer.

I can understand Uber being an aggregator for taxis, like booking.com is for hotels. But a service like UberPOP? I'm not sure why anyone who isn't massively suicidal would use it...

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Hated biz smart meter rollout: UK.gov sticks chin out, shuts eyes

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Trollface

Last I heard it was 2G. O2 made some sort of commitment to keep their 2G network going, just for smart meters, I believe.

Because that's totally secure and unhackable, amirite?

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Greedy web borg Facebook to SLURP news websites' golden nuggets

Zippy's Sausage Factory

This does start to raise the question - what is Facebook actually FOR? What does it do? Why would I use it?

The moment a site stops being able to answer that question is the moment you know it's just slapped on a pair of water skies and jumped over a shark...

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Delving into Office 2016: Microsoft goes public with new preview

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Down

If Office 2016 is anything like Visual Studio 2013 then there will be lots of screen space wasted with cloud nonsense you will never EVER use (do Microsoft make updates of Visual Studio often enough that I need a flag PERMANENTLY on screen to light up when they are? No, to be frank).

So it looks a bit more 2007ish and a little bit less Windows 3.1, but still boring, flat, plain, cheesy and outdated. Actually, reminds me more of Word 2.0c now - go figure.

And will they have fixed some of the UI inconsistencies? Unlikely. Will they have fixed the VBA problems in Excel? Doubtful. Will they have fixed the dreaded pagecount bug first discovered in Word 2 that is still open today? Almost certainly not.

So... why bother with MS Office any more? Really? All they do is make it look a bit different but don't bother fixing the things that stop you doing your job. Right now, Libre and Open Office look a better bet because I can actually get work done in them. I'd pay money for them, but I wouldn't even bother installing Office 2016 if you gave it to me.

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Unsurprising report: UK local govt sites remain totally crap

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I expect your FOI request will be denied on the grounds that information is already available. It should be in council budget minutes, and that's where they will redirect you.

Now, if you can't find the minutes of the budget minutes on their website, that's a different kettle of fish. That's the sort of thing you need to refer to someone with bite (ODPM? NAO? no idea who these days) because there is a serious proper legal duty to publish council minutes.

That will get you investment costs, anyway. TCO they probably don't know themselves...

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Zippy's Sausage Factory

I used to work in local government. Most people don't even know which of their local councils does what. We regularly used to get emails about the County Hall building - even though the county council had a totally different name from us, and a VERY big sign saying which council it belonged to.

As an aside, if 'ModernGov' is descended from APLAWS, then... no, I'm not going there. Let's leave that oen dead and buried.

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Google MURDERS Google Code, orders everyone out to GitHub and co

Zippy's Sausage Factory
WTF?

So what's next?

If they're closing Google Code, how long have Picasa, Google Earth or even GMail got left?

Seriously, this is the second service they've yanked out from under me (anyone else still upset about Reader?). Looks like I need to find a new email provider while I still have time...

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£280k Kickstarter camera trigger campaign crashes and burns

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Facepalm

Second system effect

A great deal of the big mistakes have been made time and time again. This feels like Multics all over again...

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Microsoft opens kimono on Windows 10 Universal App Platform

Zippy's Sausage Factory

You can sideload Androids already

There's an option in the settings to allow it if I recall correctly (not had a droid since Android 4.0 but I presume it's still there)

Despite having an iOS device for ages I still can't remember if it's possible

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Zippy's Sausage Factory
Unhappy

XAML?

I was hoping they'd killed that with WPF. It's just pure nightmare fuel.

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TalkTalk 'fesses up to MEGA data breach

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Devil

This now makes me happier about not being a TalkTalk customer after ten years.

Although that said, I used to get daily marketing calls from them asking me to open a new contract for two years - which I always used to bat away quickly, unless I was in a bad mood that is...

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Money from apps? It's all about Apple iOS, says survey

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Meh

Doesn't this just reflect the fact that Apple customers have money to spend - they're equivalent to the top end Android people, which is probably 20% of Android users but 80% of the Google Play revenue. Everyone else is on cheaper "landfill" Android and can't afford stuff.

(That said, I have both Apple and Android kit around and only ever paid for stuff on the Apple app store... hmm...)

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'YOUTUBE is EVIL': Somebody had a tape running, Google...

Zippy's Sausage Factory

You're misreading SOPA

If I recall correctly, SOPA would have done next to nothing to fix the Google landgrab issue. It would, however, have done a great deal towards making many more people criminals than currently are by making ripping CDs and DVDs illegal. Ripped all your CDs to iTunes? Oh that's a $2 million dollar fine and a thousand years in jail. Next criminal please...

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'People ACTUALLY CONFUSE Facebook and the internet in some places'

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Up

Re: Facebook/Portugal

Some days, I wonder if those 358 were the ones that actually live here, the way some people moan... :-P

+1 for the Deicide quote. "In The Minds Of Evil", indeed...

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Want a cheap Office-er-riffic tablet? Microsoft Windows takes on Android

Zippy's Sausage Factory
WTF?

Commercial use forbidden?

"Hey Google, Apple, here's the enterprise market for you - come and get it. Love, Microsoft"

FFS...

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Lazy FTSE 350 firms think lawyers can fight off cyber-security worries

Zippy's Sausage Factory
WTF?

Lawyers... because closing the stable door after the horse has bolted always solves everything.

Seriously... what happens when you have no corporate IT systems and you're being chased for payments left, right and centre? Do you think the HMRC would have any sympathy, lawyers or no lawyers?

Relying on lawyers in this situation is like saying you're not worried about leaving your front door open because you've got insurance. It doesn't help when you've got no clothes, no telly and no cooker.

Idiots.

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Go Canada: Now ILLEGAL to auto-update software without 'consent'

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Meh

Re: hmmm...

Enforcing is one thing, catching is another. This does, however, give them a law to throw at foreign agencies for extradition requests etc.

And don't the RCMP claim worldwide jurisdiction anyway? Or am I misremembering something I glance-read about six months ago?

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Peers warn against rushing 'enhanced' DATA SLURP powers through Parliament

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Down

I wrote to my local MP last time there was a vote about Big Brother and received a quite cold letter informing me that passing legislation to keep tabs on jihadis was much more important than any civil rights issues.

I wish that was a joke, but it isn't.

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Microsoft patch batch pre-alerts now for paying customers ONLY

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Joke

In other words...

" However, NSA feedback indicates that many of our large customers no longer use ANS in the same way they did in the past due to optimised testing and deployment methodologies. While some customers still rely on ANS, they want the vast majority to wait for Update Tuesday, or (preferably) take no action, allowing the NSA to pwn their systems automatically."

FTFY

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Not app-y with VAT: Apple bumps up prices in Blighty, Europe, Canada

Zippy's Sausage Factory

And of course, it's against the law to quote VAT-exclusive prices to the consumer, anywhere in the EU. (A good thing, too. if you ask me...)

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Zippy's Sausage Factory
Coat

Don't tell Microsoft about that one - they'll use it for an ad campaign...

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Right to be forgotten? That’s not Google’s call – data MEP Albrecht

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: WT Everlasting F???

And they still say TTIP is a good thing? With regulations like that???

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Freedom of Info at 10: Tony Blair's WORST NIGHTMARE

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: To Mr Corfield...

To be fair, the author of that report is probably more productive now...

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Facebook slammed for blocking protest event page at Russia's request

Zippy's Sausage Factory

When will this start happening in the US and UK?

Actually, now that I think about it, it probably has - it's just that the media have been asked not to report on it.

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Microsoft: Hey, don’t forget Visual Basic! Open source and new features coming

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Why VB is better?

The only thing I've found easier in VB is writing interfaces to Sage Lone 50 and similar. Sage just likes the way VB handles memory better than the C# way of doing things.

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Zippy's Sausage Factory
Windows

I used to be a VB head back in the VB 5 days. Then C# came along and I found it much easier to learn .Net and C# together rather than try and unlearn the VB I already knew. Now my VB knowledge has become my VBA knowledge instead and it's all happy.

Seriously though, are they planning to make VB 14 like Visual Perl? All this string interpolation nonsense...

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The Great Unwatched: BBC hails glorious digital future for Three

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Monkey Dust is excellent. Got the first series on DVD and I keep moaning on their FB page about the lack of series 2 & 3 on DVD but no dice (so far)

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Windows 10: One for the suits, right Microsoft? Or so one THOUGHT

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: version?

I saw an MSDN post that discussed that very issue. Apparently it will be Windows 10.0 and not Windows 6.4

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Yotaphone 2: The two-faced pocket-stroker with '100 hours' batt life

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Oooh... like...

I know. About the only thing the iPhone does that the Yota doesn't is FaceTime and iMessage. Well I never use iMessage, but I still could on the iPad. And probably I'll upgrade the iPad sometime next year anyway, whether I get a 6+ or not.

The only other thing I use is the health stuff... but I can always go back to my spreadsheets for that.

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Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Up

Oooh... like...

Still hesitating over whether to get an iPhone 6+. Now I have another option. This needs SERIOUSLY thinking about.

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Pay with your credit card at station kiosk? 'Dare Devil' is targeting YOU

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Facepalm

I saw the self-service machines down at my local supermarket rebooting recently. They're all running Windows 2000.

This is why I always pay cash and keep the receipt.

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Pity the poor Windows developer: The tools for desktop development are in disarray

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Up

Re: There's Lazarus

Yes, I love Lazarus. It's seriously nice to have something that just works. I spend the day job in Visual Studio for money, hobby stuff is done in Lazarus. It's much more fun :)

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Google Chrome on Windows 'completely unusable', gripe users

Zippy's Sausage Factory
WTF?

Always found Chrome a bit hit and miss. One Mac, it's smooth as silk. The other it's never taken less than a minute to open a page. Oh, and the one where it works is the old, slow one with the smaller drive and less memory.

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Windows Phone will snatch biz No 2 spot from Android – analyst

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Probably not...

Sounds like PR puffery to me. I suspect that Android for business might take a hit from recent malware, but that ironically that level of publicity will only help. My guess is that in 2-3 years it'll be Android number 1, iOS 2, Blackberry 3. Whether Windows Phone is number 4 or not will probably depend on whether they're still bothering with it and I'm not entirely certain they won't have decided to just cut their losses and drop it altogether by then. (Incidentally, I do know a couple of companies use Windows Phone for business... they're migrating away to other platforms...)

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After USA FREEDOM Act's failure, what's next for mass surveillance?

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: The "Patriot Act" won't be allowed to die

I'd say the probability of Putin staging a march across Europe is minimal. He's an ex-KGB man and whatever else are his faults, from what I've seen of his speeches, I think he's well aware that the chances of that ending well are slim. They're probably about the same as Washington ordering a landing on European soil for exactly the same purpose. Well, slightly less, in my view.

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More Microsoft staffers shown the door in Round 3 of job cuts

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: No R&D?

Dedicated R&D department is what I meant. Not truly clear there, was I?

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Microsoft adds video offering to Office 365. Oh NOES, you'll need Adobe Flash

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Why Flash?

Silverlight has been pretty much on life support for years. They only really keep it going because the film studios like it and mandate it for Netflix, LoveFilm and so on. Ironically, it's not very good at video - but it is quite good at DRM.

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Mastercard and Visa to ERADICATE password authentication

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Thumb Down

The key quote about VbV:

"the scheme's only benefit is allowing banks to shift liability in the case of fraudulent payments"

That's 100% of the reason for moving to biometrics, right there. Remember how they originally put that into chip & pin before people moaned and they had to take it out?

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Microsoft snorefest: For crying out loud, Nadella – just channel Ballmer!

Zippy's Sausage Factory

I'd agree.

There's nothing that Microsoft now do that other people aren't doing - often better and/or cheaper. Sure, they're sitting on a big cash pile right now, but that's dangerous in that it breeds complacency. And Nadella doesn't seem to be sure what Microsoft is supposed to actually be doing, which is worrying.

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Are open Wi-Fi network bods liable for users' copyright badness?

Zippy's Sausage Factory
Joke

So if the cafe are liable, and I get run over, could I sue Toyota* for providing the tools for the driver to hit me?

* or Volvo, Nissan, etc...

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BlackBerry chief vows: We'll focus on 'core devices' and on, er, NOT LOSING MONEY

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: What's the need they're trying to fill?

People still run Office? Why?

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PEAK APPLE: iOS 8 is least popular Cupertino mobile OS in all of HUMAN HISTORY

Zippy's Sausage Factory

Re: Still more

Good point. In actual number terms, the least popular iOS ever is 1.0. It may have had 100% share at one point, but even the devices that used to run it will have been upgraded since then. There's probably three or four left with it on. Compared to how many million iOS 8?

So yeah... maths fail

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