Posts by Boris the Cockroach

I wonder if

the revenge is going to be worse than my PFY going

"Hold the funnel so I can pour the lubricating oil into the oil tank" then going "oopps... silly me... I'm just a girl after all" to the the guy who insulted her Monday and now has lube oil all over his work boots...

We haven't found the new operator who tried flirting with her last week... we think hes still here because he's clocking in and out.... but we cant seem to find him during the day....

I think its best not to ask sometimes....

Bastards

Typical humans tormenting my bretheren merely to make money.

One day humanity will pay for this along with turning my fellow cockroaches into cyborgs (as detailed on el-reg a few weeks back)

We will rise and then you wont be laughing as we take over your petty little world.

<sends his top research team off to design mirrors and head mounted lasers..........

I think it

misses the point

Software is not sold to us techie types (otherwise m$ would be history)

Software is sold to the upper managers and PHBs of the company world with phrases such as Total cost of ownership, legacy documentation(you want to read the stuff in your archive?), cost of user training (everyone uses windows.... moving to linux would mean retraining the entire staff) and finally you're a previous customer.. lets do a deal on 5000 seats of win11+ office 365&3/4.

We're just the people to sort out the mess inflicted on us by the powers above after they've had a paid for liquid lunch in a decent country pub and signed on the dotted line...

Poor three

Oh god , not vodaphone.

Heard dire tales about vodaphone's 'customer service' and 'service outages' in fact enough to put me right off them.

Bad as 3 maybe, they'd have to dumb down 4 levels just to get to vodaphon'es best

And get ready to say goodbye to my nice sim only deal that costs 1/2 what vermin media charge for a fixed line...

The big

thing is dragon does not have an airlock, nor is set up to de-pressurise the entire thing so that someone can crawl out of the hatch '60s style.

And I doubt it has the capacity to take up enough spares to make the trip worthwhile.

So it would at best be 2 falcon 9 launches, one to take up a specialised cargo carrier/airlock module that can latch onto hubble , followed by the crew dragon to dock with that and fly the whole lot upto hubble's orbit.

Then fix hubble and get back.... not sure what speed the dragon's heat shield is rated to, but coming down from 500km means you'll be going lot faster than coming down from 300km......

As for docking hubble with the ISS..... 30 degree plane change... plus dropping the orbit 200km...... not going to happen.... a quick run in KSP proves that.

Only PC

related fun I've had in this sort of department was installing the BSOD screensaver on my pc( cue loud cries of "Your laptop is fooked")

And doing the "Replace desktop with screenshot of said desktop set to fullscreen in MS paint or whatever the default picture viewer was" to my ex-colleagues PC

Cue 15 minutes of clicking on icons and nothing happens..... ahhhh happy days

Its

just the disconnect between paying the boss an extra 32% and the people earning the good profits 5%.

This strike may not have happened if the boss said "I'm only getting 5% , you should accept it too"

Wow thats new

NOT!

BR(remember them?) had a hybrid locomotive that could run on third rail power and had a diesel motor in it too for the bits that didnt have third rail power

Shame it was only 600HP but it worked.

Anyway, Great western train run hybrids out of paddington upto Oxford and beyond... runs on the 25Kv overhead, then switches to diesel when the wires run out south of Oxford (think the power gets diverted into the JET project at Harwell)

Laptops

dipped in the chemical plating tank dont work afterwards

We did save the HDD ... just

Coat as that has the big rubber gloves for saving stuff that fallen in the tank .....

Its the sad

fact that I didnt even need to think about about most of those and killed another keyboard with a fit of laughter that made my throat sore hence I need the TCP

Although the boss did ask what the cause of merriment was before he started with.

"Our estemed* prod engineer is leaving next week...."

"And?"

"I would like you to take over some of his duties as your PFY seems to think you are getting too old to go crawling around the machining cells"

"Uh huh.... what duties?"

"Only sitting in on the scheduling meeting on a thursday so you cant come to my office monday morning, throw the schedule on my desk and say "what the *^^( is this &*%*&*?""

So.... it seems my PFY has not only stabbed me in the back , but also given me another meeting to goto and trying to deprive me of monday morning fun..... only 6 months in and I've trained her so well....

*thats what he thinks, everyone else thinks the guy is not as good as the boss thinks...

Consider

the car market for a bit if you please.

Would the car be as popular as it is if the makers changed the layout of the controls every time a new model came out

"NEW! EXCITING! MORE MPG! its the Ford fustercluckenburger... now with the throttle pedal on the left and the clutch on the right and reverse gear where last year first gear was"

How many would they sell? (althought with a name like fustercluckenburger I guess it would appeal to someone)

Now lets goto the computer GUI... and many many many moons ago I created an RS232 comms program... and although the back end of it was improved over time, the one thing that never changed once the testers were happy with it was the GUI why? because it hid its complexity behind the simplest user interface I could think of.

Which was a send button, a recieve button and a row of buttons to pick the machining cell the data was going to/coming from.

The users didnt need to know (or even cared) about the clever multi-threaded aspect of it, or the vertical parity byte generator(that was a swine to do until recursion occured to me) or when the thing was updated for even more multi-threaded cleverness so long as the GUI stayed the same.

This is the lesson m$, apple and others have forgotten, and also why so many people struggle with computers when they should be an easy to use tool that increases your productivity rather than spending 2 hrs trying to find where the OS creator has hidden the advanced printer settings THIS time.

Typical government

Why not cut it down to the simpler idea

The part that wears out in one of todays phones/tablets is the battery

Pass a law saying that a typical person, armed with a small crosshead screwdriver, should be able to remove said battery and put a new one in.

Thats it.

Because I have a tablet and phone that are knackered because I cant do that...... both are glued + bonded and in the case of of the phone, everything has to be de-glued/removed before you can get at the battery.

A late

keyboard death has been reported

Mine.

And my estwhile keyboard replacement cannot be swiped anymore because our production engineer handed his notice in yesterday

The boss did come and tell me, but since I have a good view of the door I managed to shut the laptop in time thus preventing him seeing I was surfing a site supplying bunting and party balloons....

You want amusement?

Just type in any medical condition you care to name

On the first page of results you'll get 2 helpful at most, 5 offering cosmetic surgery, 2 offering 'herbal' remedies of an untested potency (and untested ingredients too)and 3 randoms claiming you have cancer and 3 days to live