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* Posts by OzBob

201 posts • joined 6 Mar 2008

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The gift of Grace: COBOL's odyssey from Vietnam to the Square Mile

OzBob
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The reason COBOL gained a foothold and became ubiqitous?

It played to the managers and bean counters that they could potentially understand IT, so woo-ed them to open their wallets. Same reason SAP has become so successful.

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Dotcom wants NZ to have fiat-backed crypto-currency

OzBob
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Yup, Kim Dot Blob's PR machine is in full swing

He is throwing out ideas from his Internet Party about reducing internet costs, scrapping limits and reducing regulation, while at the same time the company Chorus (responsible for the communications networks in NZ) is being court-ordered to reduce line rentals that it was using to fund part of the new ultra-fast broadband rollout. So how does he plan to fix both those problems in one stroke - re-nationalisation? More money?

Throw in the scandal about his Nazi Memorabilia fetish, his impending deportation to the US, his many false-start promises to fund new projects (america's cup campaigns, pop concerts, second pacific fibre cable) and his legal threats to former employees, the-artist-formerly-known-as-Schmitz is not a welcome guest here, and the sooner he tries to stop gaming our political system for his own enjoyment and leaves, the better.

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Dotcom's Mega looks for a backdoor onto NZ stock exchange

OzBob
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And now he is confirmed as a Hitler Sympathiser

Independent reports verify he owns a rare signed copy of "Mein Kampf", written by someone he refers to as the "greatest german who has ever lived". He was also gifted a Nazi flag in 2011 for his birthday. He says "Seig Heil" when German visitors are present, based on reports from his mansion staff. (Read the whaleoil article for the evidence, the stuff article is a puff-piece).

So, still think this guy should form a politic party and run a business? IBM did well out of the holocaust, creating tabulating machines for the numbers of undesirables being gassed, so there is precedent here.

http://www.whaleoil.co.nz/2014/03/real-secret-life-kim-dotcom-seig-heil-mein-kampf-nazi-flags-admiration-adolf-hitler/

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politics/9871410/Dotcom-owns-copy-of-Hitlers-Mein-Kampf

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Kim Dotcom extradition: Feds can keep evidence against Megaupload mastermind a surprise

OzBob
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Re: @OzBob - Please get rid of this f**ker for us

so you're saying he's on a level playing field in terms of influence? Then it just makes him look like a bitch whose whining cos he's losing.

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OzBob
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Re: Please get rid of this f**ker for us

This issue is far from over. Please note the following,..

- KDC is setting up an Internet Party in NZ, to contest the election in September. As a non-citizen he cannot run but can be the party president.

- He has already fallen foul of election laws by trying to launch the Internet Party earlier with an actual party, which would have breached gifting and campaign laws had it gone ahead.

- He has claimed this weekend he has one sitting MP ready to join his party.

- The co-leader of the NZ Green Party (currently in opposition) has said he would overrule any extradition order for KDC.

- Under NZ's MMP system, a party with one or two seats (out of the 120 available) can hold the balance of power in forming a coalition government. The papers here are speculating what conditions a coalition deal with the Internet Party would involve. Care to hazard a guess yourself?

So, can anyone think of another occurence of a german starting a political party with a specific agenda and ending holding the balance of power? How well did that work out?

The mainstream media in NZ has mostly feted KDC, as have quite a few politicians. Now they are embarrassed at being caught out, so they are largely silent on the negative coverage and its the blogosphere (ironically) that is putting this information out there. Visit the excellent Whaleoil Blog in NZ for proper news and analysis.

So, thumb me down and boo and hiss me like I'm a panto villian but watch this fat f**ker try to buy his way out of his extradition with political favour.

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OzBob
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Please get rid of this f**ker for us

He is building up a bad line of credit here with various individuals and companies, yet flies around in a chopper and take expensive holidays. Here is a bus advertising both his rubbish house music album on the back, and the ISP he advertises for on the side.

http://i122.photobucket.com/albums/o257/robertosbourne69/KimDotBlob_zps2a5ab5b8.jpg

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Speaking in Tech: Holy SiT! It's our 100th ep. Time for a video-podcast

OzBob
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Congrats on 100 not out (cricketting metaphor, ask Chris M Evans what it means)

Enjoyed the visual aspect of the webcast (If it has video, is it still a podcast?). Though the screen layout did look like "Brady Bunch: TNG"

And was that Amy from Engineers Unplugged on the far right?

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My work-from-home setup's better than the office. It's GLORIOUS

OzBob
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Re: Yup.

I work for a vendor who likes to refer to "dog-fooding" as a methodology for using our own products. Its generally agreed amongst the techs that the management just pick this stuff off a shelf, we're the unlucky f*ckers who have to pick up a spoon.

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Show more CANADIAN-MADE PORN, insists Canadian government

OzBob
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Cue cross-dressing lumberjacks

with their own smut channel (who said it necessarily needed to be straight porn? or even good porn?)

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Hey, IT department! Sick of vendor shaftings? Why not DO IT, yourself

OzBob
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Most managers I meet

confuse having the responsibility for seeing a decision being made, with the responsibility of actually having to make the decision. None of my senior practioner coworkers get consulted about viability of options. Most of the time a new product gets announced I ask "is this happening with us or to us"?

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Woman claims she was assaulted in Google Glass 'HATE CRIME'

OzBob
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Trollface

And what is the condition of her cat?

:) (This post is required and must contain letters)

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Appeals court decides Dotcom warrant was legal after all

OzBob
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Re: NZ Govt

You must be a NZ Labour supporter, whose leader (in opposition) called for the entire text of the trade agreement to be released before it was signed, to allow new zealanders to vote on it. Now as a (self-claimed) former trade negotiator, Mr Cunliffe would know that any premature release of an agreement before it was signed would be a breach of good faith and result in NZ being banned from all future negotiations. And yes, you display ignorance in the same order of magnitude.

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'No, I CAN'T write code myself,' admits woman in charge of teaching our kids to code

OzBob
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The Royal Society Christmas Lectures on computers

Remember those from a few years ago? they were brilliant in showing counting, programming principles etc. They should task the producers of that program with teaching coding.

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Bletchley Park spat 'halts work on rare German cipher machine'

OzBob
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Yes it did, I got my Foundation Radio License there a few years ago. talk about mecca for techs. Apparently from other posts, they have moved out as well, and another organisation has moved into their place.

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New Zealand

OzBob
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Killing Aussies? Must have been over pavlova

Don't recall seeing anything on the Beeb website.

Whaleoil is back and his tech crew put a good post on the pitfalls of working with a vendor during a DOS and migrating away from them. Sounds like there is difficulty in getting information on the attack without court orders.

http://www.whaleoil.co.nz/2014/01/ferals-faults-fixes-co-pilots-report/

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OzBob
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Oh yeah, a famous blogger here has had a DOS attack on his website for 3 days now

and he generally slags off Kim-Dot-Blob, berates ferals who crash their cars killing people and blows the whistle on politicians having affairs. The list of possible initiators of the DOS attack is long, but distinguished.

http://www.whaleoil.co.nz/

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OzBob
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Still extortionate internet pricing

but super adsl coming soon,(if the agency that is providing it can stop the courts amending the amount it can charge.)

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Speaking in Tech: Cloud storage FAIL (as airline loses suitcase)

OzBob
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Re: who is broadcasting from the kitchen?

Actually, "authentic" and "lazy, unprofessional, & can't be bothered" all sound the same to me. I get some of the guys at work who are "telecommuting from home" on VOIP and I have to listen to the kid throw a tantrum cos it can't watch the wiggles on DVD (seriously!) and the high-pitched screams go on all the way to the bedroom. My question to the guy was "have you asked for a payrise, cos you obviously live in a phone booth".

I want just one conversation on a call at a time, un-cluttered by distraction and to the point. If you are having trouble finding a place where nothing happens, pod-cast from your f**king bedroom.

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OzBob
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Re: would you

Nah, I reckon they just want to see what Sarah looks like (hint: think Janice from "Friends" but with ink)

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OzBob
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who is broadcasting from the kitchen?

or surreptiously doing their dishes during the podcast?

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Apple coughs up 7 hours of profit to refund kids' $32.5m app spend spree

OzBob
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Question: did they also revoke the add-on functionality purchased?

Or are some kids getting power-ups for nothing here?

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Is your IT department too tough on users?

OzBob
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Get your retaliation in first

When you get above the rank-and-file of IT, you move into office politics, which has a completely different set of rules. One of those rules is that "the customer is always right, about what their initial requirements are" (Most customers only know the first stanza of that phrase).

So if you in IT can see a problem that needs a solution, analyse it and put the solution in before the customer has a chance to stick their oar in. Example, refreshes using disk copies, these had been taking a while for ages, so when we ordered a new SAN Array, I insisted in the replication licenses being included in the software bundle. I then wrote a set of scripts in a couple of weeks and had a working example with documentation in a month. All before the user got wind of it. They are still be used 5 years on, just modified for the new SAN Array commands.

The problem with this approach is you need separation from the customer so you can do this in private, you need a boss who trusts your judgement and will back your recommendations and you need the skills to complete what you are getting into without an external consultant. Oh and a test environment you can take out during the day.

Some final hints,...

Never! let the customer look under the hood at what you have done, they will dismiss it because they do not understand it.

Never! allow an alternate methodology to be trialled first, you will never be allowed to get back to yours.

Never! accept anyone's word if it is not in an auditable email. A casual approval should be responded to with "flick me an email with your formal approval so I can attach it to the request".

Always! quote timings to implement as "from formal approval" and use the words "formal approval" repeatedly in meetings to emphasise the point.

Thank f**k I am retiring soon.

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Time travellers outsmart the NSA

OzBob
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Originally hypothesised in the comic "2000AD"

Time travel and alien races do exist, the only reason they haven't visited is that they don't really see the point (when was the last time you had tea and a conversation with a chimpanzee?)

Free Stephen Wragg!

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James Bond's 'shaken not stirred': Down to trembling boozer's hands, claim boffins

OzBob
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So Bond is "fiction"

FFS, he's not like "the Doctor" and regenerates, they are different actors - of course it is fiction! They make have thrown a little tradecraft in since Daniel Craig took over the role but its still fantasy and a little bit of satire.

BTW, my best friend tries to treat alcohol and women similar to Bond (inability to deal with reality and contempt for the opposite sex), and he looks like a tramp (at 44 years old.). Not an advisable career choice.

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We MUST be told: How many Bitcoins do I need to kill a melon-head?

OzBob
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is it just me or is there

a lot more swearing on Alistair's articles these days? The trainspotting motif hoves back into view.

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How the UK's national memory lives in a ROBOT in Kew

OzBob
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This sort of reminds me of concorde

ie. the British simply beavering away on a simple concept that is complex to implement, but doing it quite well and without too much self-congratulatory fanfare.

Excellent Article, A+

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MPs: Ancient UK Border Force systems let GANGSTERS into Blighty

OzBob
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Re: I blame the unions.

And there is the difference between a bad computer system and a good one; a bad one enforces arbitrary rules on the user, a good one presents the information to the user and allows them to make the decision (but summarises that info to prevent clashes and tracks the decision for oversight later).

I used to run a mainframe (40x80 terminal) airline passenger booking system for a small domestic airline (with large airplanes), which would routinely have aircraft fall over halfway through a trip. My solution was to re-present all the passengers on board from that particular leg in different orders (sequence as selected by the user), and allow the front-of-house to rebook them using their existing information onto a new flight by putting an "X" next to their name and pressing Xmit. (Families were selected as one group to ensure they did not get separated). The system resubmitted their information to the back-end booking procedures without requiring re-entry of data.

But I was master of the system, and the users defered to my judgement on design matters (not like now, where they think they know it all).

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Where do HPC brainbox students go after ULTIMATE VICTORY?

OzBob
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(Said in the voice of Al Bundy)

They should go to a nudie bar!

(Sorry I just watched "The Internship").

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Online shopping tax slug not worth the effort: National Australia Bank

OzBob
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Nice quote from that independent australian movie "the castle"

pity when they broadcast it in the UK, they cut the casually racist comments that the aussies are so good at.

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I thought I was being DDOSed. Turns out I'm not that important...

OzBob
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the question should have read "what benefits are there to you in running an email server"? Then you are trying to elicit a response and further information, rather than sounding dismissive. I haul up people from time to time in meetings to try and get them to ask "the right questions"; ie. ones that don't drive an agenda.

BTW, the answer for me would be "I can experiment and train with mail setups and security in a non-Production environment".

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Confessions of a porn site boss: How I got it up on the 'net

OzBob
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I am showing my predilections here

but if you want to join in, realpunting.com shows uk escorts doing the deed, so you can "try before you buy". Alternatively, the private club in birmingham is a good place to visit when they are filming for their websites. (I am not associated with these sites).

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Shouldn't we have self calibrating Y-fronts and smart bog roll by now?

OzBob
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Trollface

Nice to see "Spud" from "Trainspotting"

has got himself a real job.

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Anglo-Australian cricket brawl spills over into coding clash

OzBob
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Did they include the Ian Chappell speciality in this game?

The under-arm delivery

http://youtu.be/UkQRERykq5M

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OzBob
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The BBC News website describes the game as "farcical"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-25137093

Apparently the computer version is pretty shit too!

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RIIIGHT. Sysadmins: Have you ever even MET an overly suave IT guy?

OzBob
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Stop

Scruffy = status in sysadmin world;

the less formally you are allowed to dress, the more status you have.

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Aussie bloke hacks way to top of music charts with MIDI-based tunes

OzBob
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Joke

Re: Makes you think....

"There hasn't been a genuine number one since the beatles split up"

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Vulture 2 paintjob: Four-year-old nipper triumphs

OzBob
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Re: Distress?

It's common knowledge inside the Royal Protection Unit that HRH was part of the SOE during the war and not the Transport Corp. Apparently Micheal Fagan was a bit of a mess after she had worked him over for daring to sneak into her room.

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ROBOT PODS to INVADE Milton Keynes in frenzied automatic MAYHEM

OzBob
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Re: Milton wrote about a vision of Hell....

Hey, if it was good enough for Cliff Richard on roller skates in the 80s,.... (would that be slower or faster than 12 mph)?

http://youtu.be/sn9mLnKmPco

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Want to keep the users happy? Don't call them users for a start

OzBob
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Re: You can't win

My favourite saying in the public service IT agency I worked in was.,...

"The customer is always right about what they think! they want, not what they actually need and not what is technically feasible".

Numpty senior users telling me at the 11th hour they wanted to use the DR system as a milestone image for releases as well, does not go down well with me.

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Alarming tales: What goes on INSIDE Reg hack's hi-tech bedroom

OzBob
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A tech holding down a relationship with a woman for more than 1 hour and less than 120 quid?

It'll never catch on!

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Reboot the formula: F1 and FIFA tweaked for another year

OzBob
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Re: FIFA

Unlike real soccer, where the rules stay the same. And does it allow your players to be burgled while they are playing away? and does it allow your players to take out super-injunctions because they were "playing away"? Come on EA, keep up with the times!

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Techies with Asperger's? Yes, we are a little different...

OzBob
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LOL. I think I might have Aspergers

because when I was trying to fix a problem last year, everyone at the client who knew the technicians names and phone numbers kept calling and asking for an update. I ended up picking up my phone at the 12th call, saying "the problem will continue as long as everyone keeps bugging me for updates. you are not important enough to be briefed directly, so phone the helpdesk". I then took my phone off the hook and shouted my progress updates across the partition to the lone helpdesk operator. Needless to say, my boss had a quiet word to me later about talking to the client "in my ubiquitous manner". I stuck to my guns and pointed out the helpdesk and him are there to keep this sort of shit away from me when I am working on a problem like this.

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Barmy Army to get Wi-Fi to the seat for cricket's Ashes

OzBob
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Priceless look,

Jennifer Lopez's expression while Freddy Flintoff tries to explain cricket to her. ("We play for 5 days, take meal breaks during each day and there is no guarantee of a result").

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So WHY does Huawei's enigmatic boss shun the West's spotlight?

OzBob
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Joke

Maybe he stays behind the scenes

because he still can't say "Awec Bahdwin!"

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James Bond's Lotus Esprit submarine car sells for £550,000

OzBob
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Can you imagine

the episode of "Storage Wars" this would have made?

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Google backs gallery of computer-crazed female boffinry at Bletchley Park

OzBob
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In NZ, the number of women attending university outnumbers men now,..

I am starting a campaign to get more men into university, don't think I will get much traction tho.

BTW, the women who now attend uni insist on a tertiary educated partner themselves and bemoan the fact there are not enough suitable candidates. Irony much?

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Universal Credit CRUNCHED: Dole handouts IT system to be rebuilt

OzBob
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(For comprehensive attendees only)

Think about the last time you were lumped together with a fairly representative sample of society ie. school. And thinking back, on average how many of your classmates were useless / thick / weird? 1 in 30 was my experience, so 3% of the sample. That accounts for half the unemployed so far, the rest are probably short-term unemployed between jobs.

Anyone a fan of "big data"? I would like from the govt a complete anonymised list of unemployed, along with their educational level, county of residence, and duration of unemployment. It would be interesting to massage and see where the fail point are.

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Speaking in Tech: Stay a virgin at VMworld – wear a rubber unicorn head

OzBob
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How many STFUs are there in the word "Cacophony"?

one person talking at a time, guys (and sara)

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Beat the UK's incoming smut filter: Pre-censor your grumble flicks

OzBob
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Bugger, now I will have to spend all my porno budget

on prostitutes.

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Hey, Bill Gates! We've found 14 IT HOTSHOTS to be the next Steve Ballmer

OzBob
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Best stunt ever would be,...

have Mark Zuckerberg named-dropped in the tech press by a MS insider. Biggest flame war ever.

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