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* Posts by The elephant in the room

138 posts • joined Wednesday 13th February 2008 14:13 GMT

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The elephant in the room
Trollface

Magnets?

How the fuck do they work?

I'm so 4 years ago.

The elephant in the room

Streetview 2.0

Looks like those painstakingly modelled 3D buildings are about to be made obsolete!

The elephant in the room
Flame

Re: Obligatory

Despite absolutely not following that link Ignition seems to have fallen into my computer, and I see it has a foreword by some chap called Isaac Asimov!

The elephant in the room
Joke

Re: A Chinese fork?

Chopstick surely?

The elephant in the room
Thumb Up

The best amature high-altitude footage I have seen yet!

Well done!

The elephant in the room

Re: That's a first

and has had a large knob near her frontal cortex!

The elephant in the room

I'm guessing he's funding it with Japanese war gold

what with the laying cables to Pacific islands & the encrypted data hosting, Mr Dotcom seems to have stepped out of the pages of Cryptonomicon (Googling the two I'm not suprised to see I'm far from the first to see a similarity here).

The elephant in the room

A big gap between '82 & '92

I offer you Mercenary by Novagen Software, circa 1985, which I remember on the C64 & Spectrum, and was on other systems too. 3d wireframe graphics, not too much shooting but there were underground bunkers that I spent hours trying to map, and flight above the planet to a space station, sometimes in a giant cheese, to deliver "Vital 12939 Supplies" (use a mirror on that)! I really enjoyed this game, despite never figuring out how to save my progress.

Another that springs to mind was Driller, which used a 3d engine called Freescape, from 1987. I never played this because I found using the Spectrum to be such a hateful and rage-inducing experience that I gave up gaming at home till my parents bought us an Acon A3000 (I wanted an Amiga).

The elephant in the room
Paris Hilton

Re: We can only hope

The thinking chav - putting the moron into oxymoron!

Paris because her icon looks like a thinking chavette.

The elephant in the room
Boffin

LCD arc-welding mask

The tech that makes welding masks instantly darken on striking an arc could presumably be worn by the pilots as goggles or built into the windshield. I would guess that the light from a welding arc at point blank range is a lot more intense than that from a laser pointer pointed at a flying aircraft.

Lasers arent the only dangerous lights, according to Tom Clancey in Debt of Honour, where as far as I can remember Clarke & Chavez down Japanese AWACSes with a mercury discharge flashgun.

The elephant in the room
Flame

Air travel regs on lithium battery capacity

Last time i flew i saw a sign specifying the maximum capacity of battery you are allowed to carry on - worth considering before buying a massive external battery pack. 100Wh is the limit if I've understood it correctly, so out of the listed products, only the first one is knocking against this limit (20,000mAh x 5V).

http://news.cnet.com/8301-13556_3-9839984-61.html - these are US regulations.

The elephant in the room

The Masterplan

by Heather Pringle contains good information about the Nazi expeditions to Tibet.

The elephant in the room
Big Brother

Looks like we've found the inmates...

for the next season (God help this country) of Big Brother, not to mention the opportunity for a sponsorship deal leveraging brand synergies...

The elephant in the room

Thin is out

This screen tech sounds excellent and will allow more space for other technogubbins, but the persuit of over-all thinness has gone too far in my humble opinion. Half of today's anorexic phones end up in protective armour that makes them 1990's thick. The other half end up broken. It's time to bulk up again for the sake of robustness and battery life.

The elephant in the room

Quantitative easing

by giving the free money direct to the customers?

The elephant in the room
Alien

Re: There's only one thing for it...

Given "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter", "Zombie FDR: Martian Repeller" doesnt sound an unreasonable pitch!

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The elephant in the room
Boffin

Testing footage?

Does anyone know of any footage of this descent contraption being tested on Earth, if indeed it has been tested with a physical prototype dropped from an aircraft? I realise that Martian gravity is weaker and atmosphere thinner than at home, but adjusting the size of the chute and strength of the retros shouldnt be too much trouble for rocket scientists, and would presumably be a worthwhile piece of validation.

The elephant in the room
Trollface

What difference does it make?

Everyone sends their dwgs to China for manufacturing anyway!

The elephant in the room
Coat

9 billion phones

On a planet with a population of 7 billion, 1 billion of whom live on less than $1 per day?

Disco Stu extrapolating the sales of disco records based on 1976 sales figures struts to mind.

Let me get my jacket - it's the white one with pink flames.

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The elephant in the room

Inglorious Basterds rebooted...

...in Gulf War 1.

Esentially the same script, with Nazi changed to Ayrab and Hitler to Hoosain. Col Hans Landa becomes Osama Bin Laden AKA " The Woman With Uncovered Hair Hunter", who is in persuit of renegade Saudi princess Shosanna Al-Dreyfuss. The other half of Branjelina plays Lt Alda Reine, who heads up and all-female multi-ethnic commando team whose characters are all based on their ethnic stereotypes. Bin Laden's survival at the end, albeit with a cock carved into his forehead, leaves the door open for an explosive sequel in New York and Afganistan.

But as this is all more believable and historically accurate than the Tarantino version it may not be bad enough an idea.

The elephant in the room

Moles have bad eyesight and dont generally use computers anyway

so i'd take what they say with a pinch of salt.

The elephant in the room
Terminator

Rebranding required

Dont call them "smart meters" - "smart" is intimidating to the sort of people who suspect that they could be outsmarted by them; and "meter" sounds a bit metric, like the kind of thing a European communist nazi might use.

Relaunch as the "Freedom PowerVendor(R)" - "Freedom" being a meaningless but inexplicably sales-uplifting word, and PowerVendor(R) embodies capitalist ideals of success, dominance and selling the product, namely power.

Anyone that doesn't demand that a stars-n-stripes-emblazoned Freedom PowerVendor(R) is immediately fitted to their trailer is clearly a pinko fag and card-carrying member of al-jazira.

The elephant in the room

Pedoplanet!

Transporting undesirables to Mars reminds me of Brass Eye - but it will be very important to make sure an 8 year old boy doesnt accidentally get loaded into the spaceship...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRRw1ERj2Gc

The elephant in the room
Joke

Re: I'm wondering if it's time for a return of the "ring wing"

the iPfly?

The elephant in the room
Happy

Aciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid!

"...I seem to have left an important part of my brain somewhere

Somewhere in a field in Hampshire"

The elephant in the room

Seems like a reasonable excuse to big up The Amature Transplants classic:

http://www.lyriczz.com/lyrics/adam-kay/18187-london-underground/

The elephant in the room
Paris Hilton

I have not heard of any of those experts

therefore they are not famous

therefore they are not cool

therefore their opinions of what is cool are just guesses and may as well have been suffixed with a ?

Paris on the other hand...

The elephant in the room
Boffin

Frikkin Lasers!

The solution to any problem!

The elephant in the room
Trollface

So no takers for Pie's 100 Greatest Gadgets then?

You know you will be watching if only to argue with the TV over a wet bank holiday.

The elephant in the room

Mercenary

On the Spectrum and C64 had shooting when in flight mode, and labarynthine underground bunkers that I tried to map. Never did finish it, but I did succeed in delivering "vital 12939 supplies" to a space station once. As this was a wireframe object I discovered that if you walked round the other side of it that 12939 written backwards is PEPSI!

The elephant in the room

Highlights Plus

Essentially most of what is left out of the highlights is cars going round without incident or overtaking. We can think of this as liberating a couple of hours during the best part of Sunday to do something more constructive. But if you really want to watch nothing much happening then maybe it could be recreated in CGI with videorealistic pre-rendered tracks onto which CGI cars are rendered, tracking their positions throughout the race, and spliced inbetween the real highlight footage to recreate the full-length race.

Hit the Red Button and you get to morph the CGI cars into alternative rides eg dragons or flying carpets, and change the setting of the track to the Moon or Shanghai in the 1920s...

Or you could just find a website streaming the Sky feed.

The elephant in the room
Flame

I want Mars on a stick

Never mind GEO and all people coming up with reasons why it cant be done - If it has to be kicked out of orbit one day I'm all for attaching a big rocket to it with an exhaust like my icon and cruising off to Mars. The ISS has plenty of space to fill with cargo for a Mars mission. Mars orbit is currently a lot less full of junk than Earth so it wont be in anyones' way there where it can continue its mission as a manned space station and also serve as a transit hub between subsequent interplanetary ships and landing shuttles.

The elephant in the room
WTF?

"females are more likely to have children than men..."

"...unless you're an alpha male"

The elephant in the room
Pint

The Case of the Counterfeit Kebabs

This will be handy for proving the provenance of the produce with a UV light.

The elephant in the room

...and, for that matter,

what on earth did they spend it all on?

Is this what it it costs for an entire country to replace all its plates after smashing them at the end of every meal? They should just stop doing that.

The elephant in the room

Did somebody shoot the one-eyed ghost sperm thing?

It seems to be shaking its fist in rage at its mortal chest wound.

The elephant in the room

First they came for the pedophiles

and I did not speak out --

Because everyone hates pedos

Then they came for the Islamic Fundamentalists, and I did not speak out --

Because they were almost as bad as the pedos

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out --

Because I was not a Jew

Then they came for the Socialists, which was funny because it was the Socialists that started this process in the first place,

Then they came for the photographers in public places and the Wikileakers and the Playstation hackers and the iPhone jailbreakers and the filesharers and the fans of music "wholly or predominantly characterised by the emission of a succession of repetitive beats" and the people who put their bins out on the wrong day, etc... and me,

So I blew them all to hell with IEDs I constructed by following instructions in The Anarchist's Cookbook, which was ironic because I only downloaded it and subsequently got blacklisted because I wanted to arm myself against further errosions of freedom.

The elephant in the room
Boffin

Pimp my horse

Zebras are not stripey just to look cool. You can prove anything with theoretical calculations, but evolution suggests that there probably is some merit in this camo scheme, even for small relatively slow moving targets. Admittedly this sort of scheme works best in heards and not for lone individuals, but that is just a tactical nuance for the army to take into consideration.

NYPD crime data from 1970s shows that pimps wearing leopard-skin overcoats and rolling in rides with zebra-hide seats were less likely to get whacked than other more sartorially disadvantaged playas. The data also notes that it is more difficult to apply cap to ass at night if you are wearing sunglasses, and holding your pistol sideways doesn't help either, but that is a different story.

The elephant in the room
Coat

Fundraising

If every human chips in 2 quid we can start building this thing tomorrow!

(checking pocket for loose change)

The elephant in the room
Thumb Up

Based on his track record...

...this series could be the best documentary on TV this year.

His previous series are well worth tracking down as bittorrents - unfortunately not available as legitemate DVDs (although amazon does have some bootlegs) due to the complex licencing of the enormous number of film & music clips he uses. Or is it because The Powers That Be dont want the proles to start thinking too much?

The elephant in the room
Flame

Ace McCloud

Who remembers Centurions, Saturday morning cartoon in the 80s?

I'm surprised this guy needs 4 jets when a cruise missile can get by with one, but then I haven't put as much thought into strap-on jet wings as him so must defer to his judgement.

How about folding wings so he can be fired from a canon then ignite jettisonable booster rockets for take-off, and a more pointy helmet and canard gauntlets (with guns in them)?

The elephant in the room

If you use mobile phone, any mobile phone, you can be tracked.

All phones can be tracked to within a few meters by triangulating their emissions. If this was not done it would not be possible to move between cell towers while on a call. This data is logged by the networks and those logs can be accessed by the authorities if they obtain authorization, or if they just do it anyway.

Also the web pages you browse are logged by ISPs, so if you look at location-specific content on your phone there is another record of where you are, along with the web history file in the phone itself.

So this new tracking file is simply another way for a third party to establish where you've been, seemingly less accurately than methods that were already available. Admittedly access to the logs of service providers is restricted, but anyone who has access to the phone can look at its browsing history.

Its not that there is nothing to worry about, but I don't see there is much new to worry about.

The elephant in the room
Flame

So if you can use an electric field to put out a fire...

...then I can use a magnetic field to start a fire! Mwha ha, Mwha ha ha, Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Witness the power of Magnet Boy!

The elephant in the room

Opt-in alert service?

It will be hard for a Facebook admin who does not know the poster to determine whether they are serious or what they can do to help.

Facebook could offer an opt-in service whereby the user can nominate a trusted friend or family member to be notified by the Facebook admin if another user (or monitoring AI) flags that they have they posted something out of character or suicidal. The trusted friend would be better at determining whether there is a genuine problem and better placed to take action.

It is true that users with no prior history of suicidal tendencies or other mental illness would probably not sign up to such a service, but those diagnosed with bipolar disorder for example may well welcome this as an additional safety net.

The elephant in the room
Stop

A good idea in principle

- its just that Game pre-owned prices are a rip-off. They should be half what they are to be worth considering.

The elephant in the room

To paraphrase cartoon spy Archer

They are "escorts" when they are alive. But if they are a corpse in the trunk of your car you refer to them as a "dead hooker".

The elephant in the room
Coat

It looks like a thingie!

Mine's the one made of black adderskin.

The elephant in the room
Joke

The ipad2

Its bigger than I expected!

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