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* Posts by Martin

700 posts • joined 17 Jan 2008

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Ubuntu's Lucid Lynx: A (free) Mactastic experience

Martin
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FAIL

Have you actuallly LOOKED at Ubuntu since about 8.04?

You have to look very hard to find /usr and /bin.

If you were to replace WinXP on your mum's laptop, help her configure the mail client and any "social" logins she needs, and show her where the Firefox icon was, she'd be fine. She might even prefer it.

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First among SQLs

Martin
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Pint

Brilliant!

Ms Stob's ability to write a spoof is unparallelled - they are laugh-out-loud funny even when (as in my case) you know precious little about the subject being spoofed.

Please accept a virtual beer.

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Obama: We're off to Mars

Martin
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WTF?

Oh, please.....

If you want to look into priorities in the US, then you might start looking at the multi-trillion defence budget.

Yes, it's appalling that so many people live below the poverty line. But the sort of budget we're talking about for space exploration is a drop in the ocean compared to what is required to sort out those sorts of problems.

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Times websites want £1 a day from June

Martin
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FAIL

So the Sun are going to charge us....

...for the news they get from trawling the free news sites and blogs on the internet? Right.....

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'Racist' job ad sparks investigation

Martin
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WTF?

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Great joke, there, about the Daily Mail being a decent newspaper.

Oh, sorry - you were being serious?

My mother reads the Daily Mail. I pick it up once every two or three weeks at her house to look at it, to try to find the "accurate, balanced, informative reporting, no sign of hatred anywhere" to which you refer.

What I always, ALWAYS, find is inaccurate, biassed, deliberately misleading articles and hate-spewing commentary.

It is revolting.

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Madoff geeks charged for writing book-cooking code

Martin
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20% PLUS those extra amounts?

"Madoff not only met their demands" ie gave them 20% rises (let's be British here!), "he also gave them" the extra amounts (at some other time, presumably during that year).

I grant it could be better written.

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Martin
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Oh, come on...

Excel can be used for all sorts of things - including fiddling the books.

The software these people are accused of writing could hardly be used for anything else BUT fiddling the books.

There is something of a difference here.

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IPCC Rainforest eco-tastrophe claim confirmed as bunk

Martin
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Stop

Why are ALL the climate-change articles on El Reg "sceptical"?

It would be nice if you would publish a few articles pointing out the inaccuracies (and worse) published by the sceptic community.

Bear in mind, if the climate change people are wrong, but we go along with their suggestions, we'll still end up with a better planet. If the climate change sceptics are wrong, and we go along with them, the prospects are pretty grim.

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Top exorcist says Satan at work in Vatican

Martin
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FAIL

70,000 exorcisms?

That is 3 exorcisms a day, 7 days a week, for about 64 years.

Am I allowed to call a priest a liar?

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Virgin Media wins Film 4 HD exclusive

Martin
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WTF?

Extra monthly charge?

What you're paying for is the V+ box, which gives you a three-channel PVR. I had that way before HD arrived. When Virgin introduced HD, they didn't charge any more for it if you had a V+ box.

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Dell Inspiron Zino HD

Martin
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WTF?

Six hundred and thirty quid?

No thank you.

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Cambridge Council denies iPad plan

Martin
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WTF?

Well, I'm grateful....

...that you didn't use the revolting "NuLabour" that I see here all the time.

But what your individual Labour council did is really bugger all to do with anything. I bet there are just as many Tory councils who have chosen to spend money on themselves rather than the ratepayers too.

It would be nice if you could leave your knee-jerk political posturing at home.

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Fugitive VoIP hacker admits 10 million minute spree

Martin
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And in other news in the Daily Mail today....

I think it is highly unlikely that anyone who killed someone through drunk driving has ever got just points on his license and a big fine, particularly in the UK.

Do try to do something about that knee-jerk reaction of yours.

And this guy hasn't got 25 years yet - that's just the most he might get. Bear in mind he deliberately defrauded millions of pounds AND skipped bail on a $100,000 bond - which effectively means he stole that money from the person who put up the bond. Whereas your mythical drunken driver was merely stupid and unlucky. (Have you never driven over the limit in your life? Even when you were young and stupid?)

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Michigan man in DIY rocket sled explosion

Martin
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FAIL

Even if it had worked...

....he still didn't qualify for a Darwin Award. He's presumably already had any kids he's going to have at the age of 62, and the idea is that you remove yourself from the gene pool before you get an opportunity to pass your stupid genes on.

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Sony and Arsenal to stream match highlights to PSPs

Martin
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FAIL

PSP???

Now if they were doing something like this for the iPhone (or for Android - please?) they might have something.

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eBay cans free P&P requirement

Martin
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I don't get what the fuss is all about....

I list ALL my listings with P&P included. That way, the buyer knows exactly what he is going to pay, no messing about. Do I pay a fraction more in listing fees? I suppose so - but it's trivial compared to what I believe I've gained (especially on expensive items) where people have told me that they tend to bid on my item rather than another one because they know what they are paying.

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Sky 3D soccer fails to score

Martin
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Happy

You're missing something...

The specs are quite large and fit over normal glasses.

I wear specs and I've seen Coraline, Scrooge and Toy Story 2 in 3-D - and very effective they were too.

But for footy? can't see the point. If you really want to see it in 3-D, it's best done at the stadium.

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Woman sues rail line for 'exploding' toilet

Martin
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FAIL

LOL?

"Soon you will have "Maximum load 2,000kg" on American toilets, just like we have in lifts LOL"

LOL is not a punctuation mark, despite efforts to the contrary by the kids of today.

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iPad vs e-book readers: price matters

Martin
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I think the point is being missed.....

The e-reader is really an immersive experience (sorry, I sound like a marketing drone) - you forget completely that you're using an electronic device and just get involved. It's just like a book. Colour doesn't matter, and in fact will get in the way. Same applies with a book.

I don't think that the ipad will ever be like that. It may have a place, but I don't honestly see it for books. Apart from anything else - it's just too big.

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Plastic Logic shows executive e-book reader

Martin
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WTF?

An executive e-book reader?

Does that take a book and reduce it to a two-paragraph summary which carefully ignores the tricky issues?

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Angels can't fly: Official

Martin
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Happy

Bah Humbug?

Blimey - there are a bunch of old miseries on here. "He's being funded by taxpayer's money! Outrageous!" Ebenezer Scrooge is alive and well.

It's Christmas. He's just done a bit of a calculation for the fun of it. A bit like the people who did all the calculations about what would happen if Santa were real.

I thought it was quite funny.

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NZ gal's Bulgarian airbags halt traffic

Martin
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Automated response # 27

Where's the Playmobil re-creation?

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Acer A1 Liquid Android smartphone

Martin
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Many of us?

"...many of us need nothing more than a good Twitter and Facebook application..."

Further, many of us don't even need that - particularly the first...

The phone? It's a bit ugly...

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2009's Top Netbooks

Martin
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Still too expensive...

It's got to be sub-£200 to be worth considering. as far as I'm, concerned. My Acer Aspire One cost me £175 over a year ago, and I still use it more-or-less every day. But if I were to be thinking of spending over £300, I'd be looking for a "real" laptop.

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T-Mobile coughs to data theft

Martin
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@AC - 11:32 - being a bit disingenuous...

"...the ICO didn't splash the story. They said it was a UK mobile phone operator and T-mobile decided to fess up. They could have kept schtum."

Oh, come on. You phone Orange, O2, Virgin, T-Mobile, Vodafone and one or two others, and say "Are you working with the ICO on a data theft case?" All bar T-Mobile say "No"; T-mobile refuse to comment. It doesn't take Sherlock Holmes to make the obvious deduction - and then they have to come clean.

So technically, no, the ICO didn't splash the story. But they must have known the information would get out.

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Oxford American Dictionary dubs 'unfriend' Word of the Year

Martin
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FAIL

I feel a touch of the old fogeys coming on...

...but "unfriend" as Word of the Year? What the hell are the criteria? It's not clever, it's not elegant, it's not even desperately useful. It won't stick, either - in five years time (or possibly less) no-one will use "unfriend" for anything.

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Acer Aspire One D250 with Android

Martin
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Stop

@Matt13

The Sony UX1 is two grand's worth of machine, isn't it? It damn well OUGHT to boot Windows 7in 30secs and restore from hibernate in ten seconds.

You're hardly comparing apples with apples here.

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Sony Bravia KDL-46Z5500 200Hz 46in LCD TV

Martin
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five to six years?

@AC 15:44 - "You really do expect a high price TV to last about 5-6 years."

Blimey, you have lousy expectations. If I spent £1800 on a TV, I'd expect it to last a lot longer than that - and frankly, I'd hope to be replacing it because I wanted to, not because it was no longer any good.

As for this one - I cannot convince myself that a 46" TV for £1800 is going to be a thousand quid better than one for £800.

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Bookeen Cybook Opus

Martin
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Happy

Like the landscape switch.....

....but more importantly - where did you get that nice illustrated version of Alice?

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Ubuntu's Karmic Koala opens its eyes

Martin
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Megaphone

Not comparing with apples with apples...

I'm so sick of this stupid argument.

The "Windows just works, and you have to mess around to make Linux work" people are missing the point.

If I buy a new PC with, say, Vista on it, it will just work. If then in a year or two, I try to upgrade to Windows 7 it may well work. But there's a good chance it won't go smoothly, and I'll have to spend hours trawling the net finding the drivers I want.

If I were to buy a new PC with Linux, it will also just work. And if I try to upgrade later, it may well go smoothly - but it might not, and I'll have to do a bit of work.

Blimey, even Apple has this problem. I know someone with a MAC who upgraded to Snow Leopard, and ran into a couple of issues.

So please, stop saying Windows just works. It doesn't. Buying a machine with a pre-installed O/S just works. And that's because the computer manufacturers have done all the hard work for you.

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Wales adopts mobile average speed cameras

Martin
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So we reckon Clarkson won't go to Wales now....

That's a start - now let's introduce it world-wide !

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Labour to push for broadband tax before election

Martin
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Enough already....

NuLabore and NuLiebore are just childish - up there with M$.

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Ubuntu man extends olive branch to irate Debian devs

Martin
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Unhappy

So can someone explain to me....

...why we actually need Debian AND Ubuntu?

Could they not be combined into one distro with the best of both, with ALL their developers working on the same thing?

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Apple blueprints warranty Big Brother

Martin
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FAIL

Prior art?

Most of my electronic components have a little sticker on them across the back which says something like "removal or damage to this sticker invalidates the warranty."

Works just as well, I'd have thought, and much less complicated.

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Hurt yourself? Try f**king swearing

Martin
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WTF?

@jake

"Actually, the logical way to act after hurting ones self or becoming hurt by an outside source is to quietly take stock of the situation, and then proceed with the logical solution to avoid further pain. Without histrionics. It's a survival thing ... if you get very loud and call attention to a vulnerability, that's how and where you'll be attacked.

Ask any martial artist. Or big cat."

Our big cat definitely swears loudly when you tread on his feet.

And the whole point of the huge amounts of training that martial artists go through is so that they can do things DESPITE generations of evolution. What they do is logical, sure, but it ain't what the vast majority of the animal kingdom (including us) do when we are in pain.

So I don't think there is any evidence that the scientists are, as you so inelegantly call them, fuckwits; and. with respect, I think the only person talking bollocks is you.

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Orange UK drops DRM

Martin
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Why we put up with contracts.....

"Answer is simple. Buy sim-free and unbranded/locked/tied-down outside of the operator....Many people pay over the value of their phone anyway on overpriced contracts they don't fully use. It's worth checking the full price of the phone and comparing that against a contract."

Quick sum. HTC Magic new = £500 PLUS the price of calls and data. HTC Magic = free, plus £25 per month for all the calls and data I'll ever need for 18 months = £450. (Just picked this at random as it's the phone I want when my current contract expires).

That's why people stick with contracts.

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Amazon cuts cost of Kindle

Martin
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FAIL

If they want to broaden it's appeal....

...how about selling it in the UK?

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Apple iPhone 3GS

Martin
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Sweet spot???

"the sweet spot seems to be the £34.26 per month tariff, which allows you to buy the 16GB phone for £185, or the 32GB model for £274"

£35 quid a month and £185 (or £274!!) for the phone is what you call a sweet spot? The word "expensive" springs to my mind, personally.

Yes, it's a beautiful machine. But it won't wear down my resistance until it's a reasonable price.

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Canonical certs Ubuntu on ProLiants

Martin
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@Goat Jam

I think Fraser was being just a tiny bit sarky there....

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Google Squared - the Cuilest search app ever

Martin
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The sort of "review"....

...which is so negative, you have to wonder if the author has a separate agenda.

I probably wouldn't have been interested, but now I'm tempted to actually go and look at it, on the assumption that it can't possibly be as bad as it's been made out to be.

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Acer Aspire One D250

Martin
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Look, the point of the netbooks was the price.....

If a netbook is less than £200, you buy it and live with it's foibles. Hence my AA1, for which I paid £175. So what if it's a bit sluggish and the battery life is poor.

If a netbook is £329, you start to wonder whether for another fifty quid you could get a decent sized screen and keyboard.

We seem to be losing sight of the what the first C meant in SCC !

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Doro PhoneEasy 345gsm

Martin
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Unhappy

but what's needed is a Contract or PAYG offering...

A hundred and something is still a lot of money for a basic phone - but it could probably be thrown in as part of a cheap contract.

Come on, phone companies, you're missing a trick!

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'Supermodel' glow-in-the-dark pocket monkeys created

Martin
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Go

Unintended Consequences? Darwin rules!

"After a few generations (not long), the jungle will be full of glowing marmosets!"

No it won't. I can't help thinking that Darwinian natural selection will tend to select against glowing marmosets - if they glow in the dark, they are easily caught and eaten.

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Exam bosses target faster cheat takedowns

Martin
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Unhappy

But what is the point?

I've never quite understood the point of cheating in an exam, except possibly for university finals.

You cheat in an A-level, and you'll end up at university. If you are good enough to do the work at the uni, you were good enough to pass the A-level without cheating. If you're not good enough, you'll be thrown out and you've gained nothing.

Similarly GCSEs to A-level.

And as for cheating at SATS - well, it's up there with the most futile exercises I've ever come across. So wow - you're school is now marginally higher in the league tables. Big deal !

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Can you talk and drive?

Martin
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Unhappy

Stilll a privilege, even in the country!

Quote

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Driving is a privilege, not a right. It was time drivers in the UK were made to realise that."

I have to disagree, where public transport is available or cheap taxi's then I might agree but in the country it is an essential for life.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

No - it's STILL a privilege. Go drink and drive and get caught, and you'll discover soon enough that it's a privilege. Given that it's so important to people in the country, that's all the more reason why they should be careful to keep that privilege.

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What on earth do you think you are doing, Darling?

Martin
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IT Angle

This really ISN'T the place for this discussion.

I don't come to El Reg to read economic commentary - if I wanted that, there are loads of daily newspaper sites for that.

I come here to read irreverent IT stuff and articles about Bulgarian air bags.

So....what is the IT Angle?

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Jackalope gets jaunty with Ubuntu nip and tuck

Martin
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Thumb Up

Netbook remix?

I've installed the netbook remix on my Aspire One - works straight out of the box - and I'm more than pleased with it. How about a review?

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Software generated attendance letter about dead pupil

Martin
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I'm getting sick of the offensive knee-jerk reactions....

...of many of the commenters on El Reg.

"but some fucking numpty had to put the bloody letter in an envelope."

You have NO IDEA of how many letters went out. It could have been a pile of a couple of hundred, including standard letters about school uniform or such-like. It won't have been just one.

For all you know, it could have been some temp covering for someone who was ill with stress, because of people like you spending their time swearing at them for something that wasn't their fault.

But don't consider that. Just blame the fucking numpty.

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Google kicks Amazon in the Kindle

Martin
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It's not US only....

You have to visit the Sony store in the US, and register. But you don't need a CC - you can just download into the eBook Library software and it works.

But as the first commenter noted, the books are close to unreadable.

Also, that half-million books includes things like old auction and library catalogues - not exactly what you'd call everyday reading.

Not that impressed. There are better sources of free books.

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Philips GoGear Spark MP3 player

Martin
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Unhappy

Only 75%??

"....one of the best small, cheap MP3 players on the market."

And only 75%? Baffling.

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