Feeds

* Posts by Colin MacLean

76 posts • joined 16 Jan 2008

Page:

Apple won't take tablet to September iPod event, says mole

Colin MacLean
Happy

One more thing...

Beatles Rock Band for the iPhone?

Would someone PLEASE release a tablet computer, just so we can stop talking about this vapourware?

0
0

Apple iTablet snaps emerge

Colin MacLean
FAIL

Fake!

The pics have already been discredited on a few rumour sites.

If you Google an image using "mac leopard welcome" you'll find the same welcome screen as shown on these photos. Makes you thing they've just grabbed the first image they could get and 'shopped it on...

0
0

Reg reader captures Perseid meteor

Colin MacLean

Debunk

Looks like a spear of frozen urine flushed from a passing jet.

0
0

Is Apple plotting a search of its own?

Colin MacLean

Pirates baying

I can imagine torrent searches would redirect to the iTunes store.

0
0

Apple tablet spooks world of PCs

Colin MacLean

@Peter Mylward

Having seen the less-than-favourable reviews of Flash on the HTC Hero, I think you can most likely shove it.

0
0

Apple-apeing Microsoft spins out retail store prototype

Colin MacLean

Eugenius

The thing with the Genius Bar is that you'll be taking some Apple-branded hardware/software in for examination. If it's a genuine issue, the Genius is entitled to go backstore and get you a replacement or at least perform some repair on the spot or by sending your hardware away.

How will this work at the Microsoft Store when you take your Dell, IBM, homebrew etc. PC setup in? Are they going to say "nothing wrong with your software, contact the hardware manfucaturer"?

What a great help!

0
0

Pocket Universe 1.7

Colin MacLean
Go

Version 2.0

Might be more interesting when the "augmented reality" features of OS 3.1 become available - point the phone at the sky and it'll tell you what you're looking at...

Obviously, you'll have to buy some kind of Wii MotionPlus-style hardware plug-in to make it in any way accurate...

0
0

Apple tablet unveiling brought forward

Colin MacLean
FAIL

What gets me...

I can see the advantage over a laptop if you spend all your time standing up, but you can use a laptop hands-free while sitting down, with this 'tablet' you'd have to hold it at all times or lie down/slouch and rest it on your legs...

For that reason, I'm out.

0
0

Steve Jobs snubs LSD daddy

Colin MacLean

Uproar

Imagine he had made a donation and the Daily Mail got a sniff of it. Middle England would be an Apple-free zone...

0
0

IBM UK snuffs 'final salary' pensions

Colin MacLean

Feel sorry for the oldies

The final salary pension was no longer available when I joined IBM in the late 1990s - my pension was/is at the mercy of the markets.

I was only with the company for three years, can't imagine how pee'd off I'd be if I joined as a mainframe monkey in the 60s/70s and now had the rug pulled out from under me!

It's no wonder that they didn't send the email until 5.30 (that is if they're still using Lotus Notes). ;)

0
0

Lunar orbiter beams back first Moon snaps

Colin MacLean

A load of Schmidt

As Harrison Schmidt (Apollo 17) put it, 'To those who believe the moon landings were faked: Why fake it six times?'

0
0
Colin MacLean

Fake shmake

Even if they find footprints, the conspiracy idiots will say they were created by special NASA robots - a bit like the chap in the first Wallace & Gromit feature...

Or maybe these new pictures are fakes too, taken in a subterranean bunker somewhere on an airforce base in Arizona...

0
0

Air NZ rolls out naked safety vid

Colin MacLean

Hmmmm...

Usually in-flight arousal will see you standing in-front of a judge at Isleworth Crown Court.

It still mystifies me why they sell porno mags in newsagents in the departures area.

0
0

Reg reader bombarded by 3 sales calls

Colin MacLean

Sounds familiar

I had a similar pattern of calls last year when I requested the convertion of my 3UK monthly contract to PAYG.

Mumbai obviously went into panic mode.

0
0

Apple's big week: the good, the bad, the ugly

Colin MacLean

PPC moaners

As has been stated, it's clear that the whole point of Snow Leopard is to optimise the OS for Intel Macs.

I don't see the problem with sticking to 10.5 on PPC Macs. It's not like your computer is going to stop working the day 10.6 is released...

0
0

Palm to out-iPod Apple with CEO pick

Colin MacLean

Chill pill for Will

Um, wasn't the APPLE Newton out long before the first Palm?

0
0

AT&T squeezes wannabe iPhone upgraders

Colin MacLean

Idiots!

People who bought the original 2G on contract (non-subsidised) were able to upgrade to a 3G on a new contract (subsidised) AND keep their existing 2G (which they could then sell for a tidy profit).

Now these people are expecting to be let out of a subsidised contract, given a 3Gs and able to keep their 3G (subsidy not paid off) to sell for personal profit.

Bonkers!

Stop moaning, learn from your mistake in signing a contract and go PAYG next time.

0
0

Steve Jobs could return for iPhone speech next week

Colin MacLean

Utter bobbins!

The WWDC keynote has NEVER been used to introduce new consumer-level hardware. It will instead concentrate on Snow Leopard and iPhone OS 3.

I'm guessing there will be a "media event" later in the month for any iPhone hardware announcements.

0
0

David Carradine found dead in Bangkok

Colin MacLean

Alas...

From the description of his final pose, sounds like he would have made an excellent Tory MP.

0
0

Wiltshire welcomes clutch of Great Bustards

Colin MacLean

Uses of bustard in Wiltshire

1) Some bustard has made a crop circle in my bottom field. Arrrr.

2) etc.

0
0

Websense blocks Bing in IM snafu

Colin MacLean

Internets r00l

I'm liking the video preview feature. It allowed me to watch the Bruno-Eminem get-together while at work!

0
0

Official next-gen PlayStation Portable details leaked

Colin MacLean

touch me!

WIll it have touchscreen? That's surely a must-have for a device that's going to be in circulation for years into the future...

0
0

Wikipedia bans Church of Scientology

Colin MacLean

re: Andus McCoatover

"As thick as two Tom Cruises"?

0
0
Colin MacLean

Attack!

Could lead to the biggest DoS attack since the one of the BNP.

0
0

Welsh mum amazed by Marmite Messiah

Colin MacLean

Me too

I sometimes see Jesus at the bottom of a beer glass. Usually around my 8th of the day.

0
0

Irish politico in Facebook jub-rub outrage

Colin MacLean

International call

Some chap called Silvio's on the line, says you can have his post any time.

0
0

Virgin space mothership test details posted online

Colin MacLean

Branson's actual mum

Does he have a virtual mum too?

0
0

Wolfram Alpha - a new kind of Fail

Colin MacLean

Google squared

After looking at the source, typing 'times', 'be there' or 'alpha' has amusing(ish) results...

0
0

Chinese screw sex theme park

Colin MacLean

Parks across the water

I wonder if the people behind last year's Lapland Park fiasco were involved with this good 'un...

0
0

Another 15,000 jobs to go at BT

Colin MacLean
Joke

Title

Hopefully they sack the guy who's throttling my Internet access.

0
0

Adblock developer offers 'please unblock me' tag to sites

Colin MacLean

Don Draper's view

I for one am looking forward to seeing how this plays out in season 49 of Mad Men.

0
0

Swedish couple demand right to name baby 'Q'

Colin MacLean

@IT Angle

How about FIFO?

0
0

Man gets life for killing game-obsessed partner

Colin MacLean

Regal confusion

Maybe she held the joypad with her pinkies sticking out?

0
0

Scientology spokesman confirms Xenu story

Colin MacLean
Stop

Succession question....

If a child's parents are both OC III, does the kid manage to avoid the £350,000?

Could be a funding problem once the whole world's converted...

0
0

Apple preps Jobsian magic wand

Colin MacLean

Where's the sensor bar?

I can see no reference to a Wiimote-like sensor bar. Maybe that will distinguish this of its obvious forerunner...

0
0

Swedes say nej to Sofia 'Dark Knight' Englundh

Colin MacLean

Title-uh

Englundh sounds more like a tribute to Mark E Smith...

0
0

Vulcan appeal in emergency tin-rattling

Colin MacLean
Unhappy

Me too

Shame to see the Vulcan relegated to flying in a flight sim.

I guess in these dark times, there are more important things in the world than keeping a defunct nuclear bomber in the air.

0
0

Apple delays 17in MacBook Pro

Colin MacLean

credit rocks

Computer mortgages are the future.

0
0

Iranian rocket puts satellite into orbit

Colin MacLean
Thumb Up

BBC stealth reporters?

Interesting to note Pres Dinnerjacket is flanked by Dave Angel from the Fast Show and Richard Stilgoe of Nationwide fame.

Good move from the Beeb, given that John Simpson's smug visage must already be known in every evil empire going.

0
0

BBC pumps 60 quid a head into Gaelic

Colin MacLean

Perspective

More people speak Hindi in Glasgow than there are Gaelic speakers in the whole of Scotland.

Where's their publically-subsidised TV channel? I'd love to see more Kabadi on the telly, anyway...

0
0

Mac mini said to get Ion innards

Colin MacLean
Happy

Grand Central showcase?

I'm guessing the seriously-underpowered processor may be viable as 10.6's Grand Central distributed processing feature will be used to share out any meaty tasks to the GPU.

Sounds great on paper, but existing apps would probably need to be rebuilt to take advantage.

0
0

UFO damages Lincolnshire wind turbine

Colin MacLean
Alien

Nothing gets in the way of a good story...

Read in the Grauniad that one of their reporters was at a fireworks display in the general vicinity of the turbines on the evening that the strange lights were seen.

Doesn't quite make as good a story as tentacled space beings lighting up the bland Lincolnshire skyline...

0
0

Tories pledge high speed broadband for all in 10 years

Colin MacLean
Thumb Down

Think about the storage

It's all very well letting me suck half an Internet every day, where am I going to put it all?

0
0

Steve Jobs dismisses death rumours

Colin MacLean
Happy

title

The doc probably told him to get a grip and eat a steak every now and then.

0
0

Evidence for 'iPhone Nano' gathers pace

Colin MacLean
Thumb Down

Hmmmmm....

I doubt this, mainly because it would be incompatible with most (if not all) of the content on the iPhone App Store.

Unless of course it's just an iPod Nano with phone functionality (and no touchscreen) with the clickwheel handling input like one of those label makers things (big in the 70s).

On second thoughts, naaaaaaaaaaaaah!

0
0

Bollywood to remake The Italian Job

Colin MacLean

Finale

I'll be interested to see how the finale works with a gold-carrying elephant teetering over the precipice.

0
0

Abbey IT upgrade 'chaos' hits small biz banking

Colin MacLean
Unhappy

Fail fail

Anyone else getting cheesed off with people augmenting their derisory comments with the word 'FAIL'?

I've no idea where this phenomenon originated (possibly a school yard somewhere in the USA).

0
0

Tron sequel already in production

Colin MacLean

And the smutty spoof will be called...

Pron 2.0

0
0

Smut email hubby claims iPhone glitch

Colin MacLean

And the moral of the story is...

Password lock your phone.

0
0

Gadget Show competition spews text spam

Colin MacLean
Thumb Down

One prog best recorded

Usually record this show. Works great with my PVR's 2-minute forward skip button as Five's ad breaks last 4 minutes and the phone-in comp segment 2 minutes.

Given the crap challenges (testing product X still works after being run over by a tank), I can view the whole show in around 10 minutes.

The one redeeming feature is the older chap with the bushy eyebrows who sometimes presents a useful product test.

Although the "older chap" is probably really younger than the baldy.

0
0

Page: