* Posts by Christoph

1864 posts • joined 24 Dec 2007

Millions of voters are missing: It’s another #GovtDigiShambles

Christoph
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Re: Head of the household?

Way back in the 60s some census bloke was trying to get the details of a hippie commune. Eventually he despairingly said "Well, who's the head of the household?". "Man, we're all heads!"

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FBI alert: Get these motherf'king hackers off this motherf'king plane

Christoph
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Re: Either

"Your systems can be hacked"

Nonsense! Our systems are perfectly safe!

"Hey, I'll hack your systems! :-)"

Arrest that terrorist!

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White House cyber-general says US must be able to cyber-nuke the worst of the cyber-worst

Christoph
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Black Helicopters

False flag

The problem is to reliably identify the attacker.

If you want to damage a country, plant malware on its computers that will make them attack the US, and the US will obligingly respond.

Anyone could do this, another country, a blackmailer, or one of these teenagers who delight in getting strangers' houses visited by a SWAT team. Get a whole country SWATted - what bragging rights!

But the most likely attacker, and the one with the most skills to bring it off and avoid notice, is of course the USA. Any country which has oil or other resources that the US wants, or that thinks that having a democratic government means acting in the interests of their own citizens rather than in the interests of the USA, will have its computers taken over by the NSA and used to attack US computers, giving an excuse (as if one were needed!) for a 'retaliatory' attack.

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Australia mulls dumping the .com from .com.au – so you can bake URLs like chocolate.gate.au

Christoph
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Re: Dot Oz?

That was what they used originally. It got changed over years back to the standard ISO value - I think partly because businesses were starting to use the net and winged that .oz wasn't businesslike.

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That's right: FBI agents can't pretend to be ISP repairmen to search homes without a warrant

Christoph
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Unwarranted search and seizure

Search maybe. The provision on seizure is dead. The US police can rob anyone of money and valuables at whim, and the victim must then jump through myriad bureaucratic hoops to try to prove that it wasn't drug money.

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'Truth in advertising laws apply to you too, mobile app sellers'

Christoph
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Re: Truths

What is the difference between unethical and ethical advertising?

Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public;

ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the public.

-- Vilhjalmur Stefansson, "Discovery", 1964

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Are YOU The One? Become a guru of your chosen sysadmin path

Christoph
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Non ex transverso sed deorsum

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You! GOOGLE! HAND OVER the special SAUCE, says Senate (of France)

Christoph
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Google got so big because its search algorithms were much better than those of its competitors.

It has to keep tweaking those algorithms because people keep trying to game the system to get their ranking higher.

If those algorithms are made public they would be handing the crown jewels of their company to their competitors, and telling everybody how to tweak their web pages to distort the search results.

I presume that the web sites of all french political parties give clear links to the web sites of their rivals?

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Default admin password, weak Wi-Fi, open USB ports ... no wonder these electronic voting boxes are now BANNED

Christoph
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Re: The position of the constitutional court of Germany is worthy of note

"voting should be able to be automated. Only corrupt, paranoid, or stupid people would disagree"

Perhaps you could explain this to the large number of corrupt, paranoid, and stupid experts who have studied voting systems in great detail and pretty well universally agree that due to a number of problems a reliable, secure electronic voting system cannot at the moment be made.

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Bank-card-sniffing shop menace Punkey pinned down in US Secret Service investigation

Christoph
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"cashiers using the POS system to browse malicious websites or open phishing emails"

Why does a POS system need to have a browser installed? Or any software not directly related to running the system?

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Labour policy review tells EU where to stuff its geo-blocking ban

Christoph
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How does this affect micro-businesses?

Tiny one-person on-line businesses have already been hammered by the new VAT regulations.

Some of them have been forced to avoid having to comply with ridiculously onerous regulations by giving up all sales to the EU outside their own country.

Are they now to be obliged to sell all over the EU, and therefore be subject to the new regulations? Most of them simply cannot do this - it's not difficult, it's flat-out impossible.

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'Arkansas cops tried to hack me with malware-ridden hard drive'

Christoph
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Is this the first time this has happened, or just the first time it's been noticed?

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You’ll be the coolest guy in IT if you ain't got your ID

Christoph
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Re: That's why you get to know the security people

The RSM should be very pleased you checked him. Anyone who thinks he's immune to security checks because he's the boss is giving a terrible example.

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Christoph
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Re: That's why you get to know the security people

Someone I knew pulled "I am not going to show you my ID you nasty security oik because you ought to recognise me. You must recognise me, because I'm the person who keeps causing you problems by refusing to show my ID."

The silly bugger refused to back down, and got himself fired.

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RELICS of the Earth's long lost TWIN planet FOUND ON MOON

Christoph
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Mushroom

So there really was

An Earth-shattering KABOOM!

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Popular crypto app uses single-byte XOR and nowt else, hacker says

Christoph
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I've seen worse

There was a desktop search program called 'Personal Librarian' that 'encrypted' its files with a Caesar cypher.

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Don't be stiffed by spies, stand up to Uncle Sam with your proud d**k pics – says Snowden

Christoph
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Try here for the video.

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UCLA trumpets supercapacitor for wearables or implants

Christoph
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What are the failure modes?

The more densely you store energy the nastier it is when it escapes, regardless of the technology. But it's even nastier if it escapes fast.

A lithium battery in your pocket can catch fire, and dump its energy in a few minutes.

A supercapacitor in your pocket can go FA-ZAPP!

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Encryption is the REAL threat – Head Europlod

Christoph
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So what will be enough power?

OK, where will they stop?

Suppose we give them yet more powers that they demand. Will that finally satisfy them?

Or will they be back yet again the next day demanding even more powers because <latest scare story!!!!!!!!>

They have proved over and over again that they will never be satisfied. They will always want more power.

And what has it got us in return? Are we more protected? Are we safer? Have they got any real evidence and not more of the ludicrously blown up 'Terror Threat Foiled!' stories?

Way back in the 60s you could walk down the street without a plod being able to stop and search you because he was feeling bored. Then they got the new powers because OMG Drug Dealers! So now we have a much worse drug problem, less civil liberties, and lots of young and minority people who hate the police because they can't walk down a public road without being stopped and having to prove their innocence.

Will the police stand up in public and tell us, clearly and specifically, AT WHAT POINT WILL THEY STOP?

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Cross-dressing blokes storm NSA HQ: One shot dead, one hurt

Christoph
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Re: Lost

Men dressed as women, it must be a couple of FBI agents.

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Opportunity suffers another flash-memory 'amnesia' moment

Christoph
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Re: My memory is perfect.

Well memory is the second thing to go.

What's the first thing?

The first thing what?

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'If people can encrypt their cell phones, what's stopping them encrypting their PCs?'

Christoph
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Re: Congressman John Carter

For all he understands how the world works, John Carter might as well be on Mars.

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Court recording biz with clients EVERYWHERE has forums breached

Christoph
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MD5 is not the right hash to use for passwords. It's designed to be quick. For passwords you should use a slower hash that increases the cost of breaking it.

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Bye bye, booth babes. IT security catwalk RSA nixes sexy outfits

Christoph
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I can see one possible downside. If you can't tell at a glance which women are booth babes, will that make salesdroids even more likely to assume that any female attendee is a booth babe and ignore them?

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I see you have the gTLD that goes .ping!

Christoph
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.ping?

And the gTLD .ring has been bought by a company based in Mordor.

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AT&T, Verizon and telco pals file lawsuit to KILL net neutrality FOREVER

Christoph
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Capricious?

Huge amounts of detailed discussion and comments from huge numbers of people, giving clear reasons why it's a good idea, and they describe the decision as 'capricious'?

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

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HUGE Aussie asteroid impact sent TREMORS towards the EARTH'S CORE

Christoph
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Re: Devonian?

"Who knows what could have arisen in the present day if it were not for things like this?"

Or might not have arisen. Each extinction event led to evolutionary radiation as life recovered. Without the extinctions life would have been more stable and fewer new designs would have appeared. For instance the mammals got nowhere until the dinosaurs were removed.

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Swedish city demands £40,000 to repair teenage hacking spree

Christoph
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We know our system is secure because nobody points out any faults.

If anyone does point out any faults, we sue them.

See? Nobody points out any faults.

What could possibly go wrong?

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Mature mainframe madness prints Mandlebrot fractal in TWELVE MINUTES

Christoph
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Reminds me of the story of a machine at a certain Establishment in Berkshire that was programmed to run Space Invaders.

It printed out a screen in ASCII (or EBCDIC?) characters, waited for user input of Left, Right or Fire, then printed the next screen.

As immortalised in Dave Langford's "The Leaky Establishment" - but taken from an actual event.

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'All browsing activity should be considered private and sensitive' says US CIO

Christoph
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Stop sniggering at the back there.

And start guffawing.

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Web geeks grant immortality to Sir Terry Pratchett – using smuggled web code

Christoph
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There's even a song about it.

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Osbo: Choose a f*cking IoT fridge. Choose spirit-crushing driverless cars

Christoph
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Give him his due - he has actually realised that there are some people so poor that they only have a mere two kitchens.

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My self-driving cars may lead to human driver ban, says Tesla's Musk

Christoph
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Trollface

Simple fix

Just warn everyone that the robot car is coming. Have a man with a red flag walk along in front of it.

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NASA wants you to help space mining corp strip mine the Solar System

Christoph
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Holmes

Check the prior art

They should have a look at an early paper on this topic.

"On the Dynamics of an Asteroid" by a Professor Moriarty.

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SpaceX to deliver Bigelow blow-up job to ISS astronauts

Christoph
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Balloon animals anyone? Can they tie it into a Little Green Man?

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UK call centre linked to ‘millions’ of nuisance robo-calls raided by ICO

Christoph
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Re: Proper punishment

Five years each working on a help desk - one of the ones where you are not allowed to disconnect a call regardless of what the caller says.

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One does not simply ask the inventor of the WWW what he thinks about memes

Christoph
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"Interestingly, he agreed that the structure of the web addresses was probably back-to-front and may have been better if the top-level domain - like dot-com - came at the start rather than the end of a URL"

Which is the way that the UK network did work until they had to change round to match the way the USA did it when the networks merged.

It makes far more sense, but what can you do when you have to work with people who even have their dates inside out?

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Google will make you live to be 500, claims Ventures president

Christoph
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You don't need to live to be 500

If they can just get a few extra years of life, in that time the technology will get better and you can get a few more years. Long before you reach age 500, it will be possible to live for much longer than 500 years. Just keep going.

And one reason - if we can get lifespans up to a few thousand years, the galaxy is ours. We can cope with the time taken for interstellar journeys.

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Scotland to get National ID system 'by the backdoor', campaigners mull challenge

Christoph
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WTF?

Your relationship with your Doctor is based on trust

You trust your Doctor with extremely personal information so that Doctor can keep you healthy. You expect that data to be kept confidential.

Where does that trust go when you know that anything you tell your Doctor will be passed round every bureaucrat who feels like having a look?

What will happen to your health when you dare not tell things to your Doctor?

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Will NASA's Dawn spot ALIEN LIFE on asteroid belt dwarf world Ceres?

Christoph
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Joke

dwarf world Ceres

Is that a smaller version of the baseball championships?

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Shove off, ugly folk, says site for people who love themselves

Christoph
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Joke

Re: Tawnie Lynn (pictured)

I wonder where he got that photo he's using?

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UK spaceport, phase two: Now where do we PUT the bleeding thing?

Christoph
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Great idea - the UK has world-class expertise on space launch systems.

Oh no, hang on, that was fifty years ago before they cancelled the lot just as it was ready, and dismantled all the teams with their accumulated experience and expertise. And then stonewalled every attempt to revive them.

Why would anyone want to come to the UK to do space launches?

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Australia threatens to pull buckets of astronomy funding

Christoph
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Don't pay Danegeld

They will have to vote against the funding. If they give in on this, the government will use the same tactic on everything that comes up.

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Boffins find Earth's earliest Homo in Ethiopian hilltop

Christoph
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"Mouthy ancestor sets human history back 400,000 years"

I thought for a minute there you were talking about Republicans

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You're outta here! Baseball star strikes out sleazy trolls who targeted teen daughter

Christoph
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Re: get yer pitchforks

Interesting. Would the people who downvoted my post like to explain to me why they did this? Why they think it's OK to harass people online just because they are female?

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Christoph
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Re: get yer pitchforks

Do you support vigilante action against anyone appearing on or mentioned on the internet while daring to be female?

Is Posting While Female to be classed along with Driving While Black?

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East Timor was officially removed from the internet yesterday

Christoph
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While they're sorting out the country codes

Bring back the original internet code for Australia - .oz

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Unity, Mozilla team up to bring PEW! PEW! PEW! to browsers, too

Christoph
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"Microsoft has said it plans to include asm.js optimizations in future versions of Internet Explorer"

I thought they'd decided to kill off IE?

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EasyGroup continues bizarre, time-travelling domain crusade

Christoph
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How bad do they have to be before they can be added to the official list of vexatious litigants?

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ASML‬ plays down mystery hack attack

Christoph
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So the NSA can now add their extra circuitry to all the chips made by that equipment?

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