* Posts by Christoph

1844 posts • joined 24 Dec 2007

Opportunity suffers another flash-memory 'amnesia' moment

Christoph
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Re: My memory is perfect.

Well memory is the second thing to go.

What's the first thing?

The first thing what?

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'If people can encrypt their cell phones, what's stopping them encrypting their PCs?'

Christoph
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Re: Congressman John Carter

For all he understands how the world works, John Carter might as well be on Mars.

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Court recording biz with clients EVERYWHERE has forums breached

Christoph
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MD5 is not the right hash to use for passwords. It's designed to be quick. For passwords you should use a slower hash that increases the cost of breaking it.

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Bye bye, booth babes. IT security catwalk RSA nixes sexy outfits

Christoph
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I can see one possible downside. If you can't tell at a glance which women are booth babes, will that make salesdroids even more likely to assume that any female attendee is a booth babe and ignore them?

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I see you have the gTLD that goes .ping!

Christoph
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.ping?

And the gTLD .ring has been bought by a company based in Mordor.

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AT&T, Verizon and telco pals file lawsuit to KILL net neutrality FOREVER

Christoph
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Capricious?

Huge amounts of detailed discussion and comments from huge numbers of people, giving clear reasons why it's a good idea, and they describe the decision as 'capricious'?

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

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HUGE Aussie asteroid impact sent TREMORS towards the EARTH'S CORE

Christoph
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Re: Devonian?

"Who knows what could have arisen in the present day if it were not for things like this?"

Or might not have arisen. Each extinction event led to evolutionary radiation as life recovered. Without the extinctions life would have been more stable and fewer new designs would have appeared. For instance the mammals got nowhere until the dinosaurs were removed.

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Swedish city demands £40,000 to repair teenage hacking spree

Christoph
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We know our system is secure because nobody points out any faults.

If anyone does point out any faults, we sue them.

See? Nobody points out any faults.

What could possibly go wrong?

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Mature mainframe madness prints Mandlebrot fractal in TWELVE MINUTES

Christoph
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Reminds me of the story of a machine at a certain Establishment in Berkshire that was programmed to run Space Invaders.

It printed out a screen in ASCII (or EBCDIC?) characters, waited for user input of Left, Right or Fire, then printed the next screen.

As immortalised in Dave Langford's "The Leaky Establishment" - but taken from an actual event.

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'All browsing activity should be considered private and sensitive' says US CIO

Christoph
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Stop sniggering at the back there.

And start guffawing.

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Web geeks grant immortality to Sir Terry Pratchett – using smuggled web code

Christoph
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There's even a song about it.

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Osbo: Choose a f*cking IoT fridge. Choose spirit-crushing driverless cars

Christoph
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Give him his due - he has actually realised that there are some people so poor that they only have a mere two kitchens.

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My self-driving cars may lead to human driver ban, says Tesla's Musk

Christoph
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Trollface

Simple fix

Just warn everyone that the robot car is coming. Have a man with a red flag walk along in front of it.

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NASA wants you to help space mining corp strip mine the Solar System

Christoph
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Holmes

Check the prior art

They should have a look at an early paper on this topic.

"On the Dynamics of an Asteroid" by a Professor Moriarty.

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SpaceX to deliver Bigelow blow-up job to ISS astronauts

Christoph
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Balloon animals anyone? Can they tie it into a Little Green Man?

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UK call centre linked to ‘millions’ of nuisance robo-calls raided by ICO

Christoph
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Re: Proper punishment

Five years each working on a help desk - one of the ones where you are not allowed to disconnect a call regardless of what the caller says.

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One does not simply ask the inventor of the WWW what he thinks about memes

Christoph
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"Interestingly, he agreed that the structure of the web addresses was probably back-to-front and may have been better if the top-level domain - like dot-com - came at the start rather than the end of a URL"

Which is the way that the UK network did work until they had to change round to match the way the USA did it when the networks merged.

It makes far more sense, but what can you do when you have to work with people who even have their dates inside out?

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Google will make you live to be 500, claims Ventures president

Christoph
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You don't need to live to be 500

If they can just get a few extra years of life, in that time the technology will get better and you can get a few more years. Long before you reach age 500, it will be possible to live for much longer than 500 years. Just keep going.

And one reason - if we can get lifespans up to a few thousand years, the galaxy is ours. We can cope with the time taken for interstellar journeys.

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Scotland to get National ID system 'by the backdoor', campaigners mull challenge

Christoph
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WTF?

Your relationship with your Doctor is based on trust

You trust your Doctor with extremely personal information so that Doctor can keep you healthy. You expect that data to be kept confidential.

Where does that trust go when you know that anything you tell your Doctor will be passed round every bureaucrat who feels like having a look?

What will happen to your health when you dare not tell things to your Doctor?

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Will NASA's Dawn spot ALIEN LIFE on asteroid belt dwarf world Ceres?

Christoph
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Joke

dwarf world Ceres

Is that a smaller version of the baseball championships?

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Shove off, ugly folk, says site for people who love themselves

Christoph
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Joke

Re: Tawnie Lynn (pictured)

I wonder where he got that photo he's using?

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UK spaceport, phase two: Now where do we PUT the bleeding thing?

Christoph
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Great idea - the UK has world-class expertise on space launch systems.

Oh no, hang on, that was fifty years ago before they cancelled the lot just as it was ready, and dismantled all the teams with their accumulated experience and expertise. And then stonewalled every attempt to revive them.

Why would anyone want to come to the UK to do space launches?

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Australia threatens to pull buckets of astronomy funding

Christoph
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Don't pay Danegeld

They will have to vote against the funding. If they give in on this, the government will use the same tactic on everything that comes up.

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Boffins find Earth's earliest Homo in Ethiopian hilltop

Christoph
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"Mouthy ancestor sets human history back 400,000 years"

I thought for a minute there you were talking about Republicans

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You're outta here! Baseball star strikes out sleazy trolls who targeted teen daughter

Christoph
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Re: get yer pitchforks

Interesting. Would the people who downvoted my post like to explain to me why they did this? Why they think it's OK to harass people online just because they are female?

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Christoph
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Re: get yer pitchforks

Do you support vigilante action against anyone appearing on or mentioned on the internet while daring to be female?

Is Posting While Female to be classed along with Driving While Black?

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East Timor was officially removed from the internet yesterday

Christoph
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While they're sorting out the country codes

Bring back the original internet code for Australia - .oz

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Unity, Mozilla team up to bring PEW! PEW! PEW! to browsers, too

Christoph
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"Microsoft has said it plans to include asm.js optimizations in future versions of Internet Explorer"

I thought they'd decided to kill off IE?

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EasyGroup continues bizarre, time-travelling domain crusade

Christoph
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How bad do they have to be before they can be added to the official list of vexatious litigants?

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ASML‬ plays down mystery hack attack

Christoph
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So the NSA can now add their extra circuitry to all the chips made by that equipment?

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US military SATELLITE suddenly BLOWS UP: 'Temperature spike' blamed

Christoph
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And the Tea Party will insist that it was Obama

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FORK ME! Uber hauls GitHub into court to find who hacked database of 50,000 drivers

Christoph
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March last year?

Hey you, explain why you visited an obscure web page nearly a year ago! What do you mean you can't remember? That's very suspicious!

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Facebook sad-nav: How to put depressed chums on internet suicide watch

Christoph
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Hi Gerald, you know that very private message you shared with only the one friend you knew you could really trust?

Tough luck, he handed over to us.

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Spotty Ceres baffles boffins with bright patches

Christoph
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How about the microamanfromMars as the El Reg unit?

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Boffin: Use my bionic breakthrough for good, and not super cyborgs

Christoph
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Re: pfft

Yet more prophetic SF: Limbo '90

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Who uses the Universal Credit system? ALMOST NOBODY, says report

Christoph
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Benefits of benefits

"As the department has justified this spending on the promise of benefits in the future – such as from higher employment "

You don't get higher employment by Belgiuming about with the benefits system. You don't get higher employment by starving people for the crime of being out of work. You get higher employment by making more jobs available.

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Wanna free web domain for a year? Hey, it's not rocket .science

Christoph
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Maybe they wanted to see what is most popular so they can charge more for them or reserve them?

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Christoph
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Unhappy

Bother!

mad.science has already gone

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Not even GCHQ and NSA can crack our SIM key database, claims Gemalto

Christoph
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How would they know? The NSA doesn't bother hacking into places where it can plant compromised equipment. Or it might have used an inside agent.

They claim they couldn't have missed an attacker, but the NSA missed Snowden!

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Spacewalking NASA 'nauts hook up power and data cables to ISS Harmony module

Christoph
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Re: You think you 'ad it tough.

When I was a boy all our networks

Were for hauling in fish from the sea--

Our bawd rate was eight bits an hour (and she was worth it!),

And our IP address was just 3.

And you kids who complain that the World Wide Web

Is too slow oughtta cut out your bitchin',

'Cuz when I was a boy every packet

Was delivered by carrier pigeon

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Christoph
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"new docking adapters" ... "lubricate the end of the space station's robotic arm"

Presumably all the usual headline writers are taking Sunday off?

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Be your own Big Brother: Covert home spy gadgetry

Christoph
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Re: re. 'Casio' and 'Pure' items

Can't they? If that calculator has Casio's name on it, can they not sue anyway? It may be explained to the purchaser so it's not actually passing off, but it is damaging Casio's good name if their kit is distrusted by other people as if it was made by Sony or Lenovo.

And it presumably carries various things that are registered as Casio trademarks. I doubt you could get away with selling something with a picture of Mickey Mouse on it just by telling the buyer that it's not a genuine Disney product!

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Did NSA, GCHQ steal the secret key in YOUR phone SIM? It's LIKELY

Christoph
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Re: @Christoph

Yes, the nuclear power bit is one of the main reasons I said that the Greens are a long way from perfect. But they don't deliberately leave people starving on the streets to give more money to their rich pals.

They are human. They do wrong things. They do stupid things. But they don't do vile things.

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Christoph
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Angel

"It is longstanding policy that we do not comment on intelligence matters. [T]he UK's interception regime is entirely compatible with the European Convention on Human Rights."

Nobody is allowed to know anything about what we do, but we are all sweet and innocent. No, we're not going to give you any evidence of that. Yes, we've been proved to break those rules over and over in the past, but we don't do it now - because we say we don't, so there. Trust us!

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Christoph
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The only party (in England) outside the current block is the Greens. They're a long way from perfect, but they're way, way better than the blue, red and yellow Tories. Someone worked out that if people voted for policies rather than parties, the Greens would be the biggest party in parliament.

Have a look at Vote for policies

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After Brit spies 'snoop' on families' lawyers, UK govt admits: We flouted human rights laws

Christoph
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"It does not mean that there was any deliberate wrongdoing on the part of the security and intelligence agencies"

If they listened in on conversations between lawyer and client and passed that information to the prosecution, and did not realise that this was illegal, they should be fired for gross incompetence.

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BLOOD STAR of the NEANDERTHALS passed close to our Sun

Christoph
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"So where are they????"

Behind you!

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A cookie with a 7,984-year lifespan. Blimey, Roy Batty only got 4!

Christoph
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Year 9999

The cause is obvious - a lazy developer just set the maximum possible date to make sure they wouldn't expire.

The solution is simple - ask the CEO to explain, in public, why his company needs to store the cookie for so long. The developers will very quickly learn not to do that!

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Big Brother in SPAACE: Mars One picks first 100 morons to suffocate, er, settle on Red Planet

Christoph
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Just suppose it actually works, and they get people up there and living there. And then everyone gets bored with the reality show that's just showing the same old things over and over, and their funding disappears.

There's no way to evacuate. They can't keep going forever, sooner or later the colonists are going to be abandoned.

And that assumes that nothing catastrophic goes wrong, when any kind of help is years away. They can't do a Shackleton and work their way home, they're stuck there.

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Hackers fear arms control pact makes exporting flaws illegal

Christoph
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Re: I wore a T-shirt similar to this one on several trips (10? 12?) ...

It's hilarious until you're the victim getting the rubber glove or the several years in a US jail.

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