330 posts • joined Friday 7th December 2007 06:37 GMT
IMHO...Joe Public sees slabs as "fun,'n'cool; watch telly on the train, facefcuk, angry birds etc, so by an ecosystem I mean appsland, If you want to battle away with Excel, VS 2012 or whatever, you'd be better off with a laptop or in the case of Excel, RT. And try running VS on a screen that's slightly bigger than a big kindle frire. The vast majority of "people" bought a house PC so the kids could do their homework, they could do their CVs, play games on the internet and look at pr0n. When laptops got cheap then they didn't have to hide in their bedrooms anymore, and with tablets their CVs get written in work time and mailed to themselves, they can look at pr0n, download/stream videos, listen to music, go interwebbing, chat with their mates and the only thing that's left is the kid's homework which they'll use the old clunker for. Us techie types might ooh and aah that you can load world + dog onto your Pro, but who'd really want to. If a new laptop is say £350 and a kindle is <£200 why would I really need to spend £800 on something that'll make me look like I'm bashing the bishop on the train, when all I'm doing is editing a document.. I really wanted a Pro, but its time is passed already and I can do more with £800
Bing has a homepage team?
Who knew...and what do they do all day? Do they have a single monkey at the back end going the actual searches then? It's like something from the IT Crowd..."we've developed this great new search engine...here's the home page!"
"yeah, just type in your search string and click the button and it goes to Google for the results."
Oh and a Bing in Scotland means a slag heap...nuff said.
Must say, I think I'm beginning to develop Eadon-itis here.
F************K OFFFFFFFFFFF. MS needs its head examined. Lil' hint lads...you're late to the tab party, no one trusts win 8 and you've jack of an eco-system. No iWa*k is going to switch to MS and no Android user is going to cough that sort of cash, so get real and realise your coming from behind (and not in a good way)
Signed: A Friend.
As JC would say...
how hard can it be?
Set your terrorists up like contacts, intelligence communications as if they were pieces of correspondence, search as required, assign agent to deal with. It's a CRM system!
You sure this isn't an episode from The Thick Of It?
Being cheeky, Liverpool digital skills..is that how to flog stolen laptops in a pub?
Call that a gun!
This is a gun....http://www.chiappafirearms.com/product/729
The box that housed the internet.
Typing Google into Google
and my personal favourite, the long Russianesque march to the smoking shelter. I've done it so many times.
Re: the trouble with auditors
My GF is a finance director of a multinational and apparently it doesn't seem to work like that with auditors(i.e.1+2=3). The bigger the numbers get, the more "fluid" and "open to interpretation" they become. At the end of the day it seems like everyone has an idea of a figure and everyone eventually agrees a "feels about right" number. It's quite baffling to watch.
First off...thanks for the Irish double Dutch tip, I'd never heard of it. Second, Google sells stuff that is more err..."etherial" than Apple, so I presume finding out who sold what to whom and where is a bit more complex than an IPad coming out of Regent Street. Mind you, Apple probably sell iStuff in the UK at almost 0 profit (I'm guessing here) as their Irish supplier's (Apple IE) price for products + the cost of the UK operation are so very, very high (cough) that there is little tax on profits. Once the cash is in the arms of the Irish supplier, then you can double dutch to your heart's content.
I'm sure there will be a bit of shenanigans regarding the various VAT rates too. Irish 23%, UK 20%, Netherlands 21%. Who said accountants were boring.
Re: Well, well, well
Well if we're comparing sizes, my well is 250m deep, 200mm dia bore job down to an underground river (Catalonia). I'm dying to send a fishimg line down there, with either a camera or a hook with a worm on the end to see what prehistoric monsters live down there.
I thought they just asked the British government to get their boys to sex some stuff up for the NSA when they wanted "useful" information. Saves all that tedious typing and searching and you get exactly the information you need, if for example you want to invade someplace pronto.
Oh yeah...the call logs. They tell you everything you don't need to know and nothing you do need to know. Then there's the small matter of getting the data out of the things so that it means something to someone in business,
Then there are the call cuts offs and call crashes for no apparent reason and no one who sold the bloody things can find out why either. They just retreat to their "data centre" and have a wa** whilst the business managers go apeshit on IT's ass (who didn't buy or spec the things in the first place). No, that's the fault of some twat in business who thought IP phones were good for his CV and legged it pronto shortly after they were bought. I'll stop now to get my blood pressure down.
C'mon, this is going to be great!
Just think of all those twitter celebs not having to tweet, followers will be able literally **OMG** to follow their idols 24/7/365 via live "life" streaming feeds. Advertisers paying to be on those feeds, fashions changing in an instant as celebs A goes "they're nice shoes" and a million followers buy them. Rampant consummerism causing chaos with logistics. No CCTV anymore as all citizens will have a legal requirement to view any incidents happening in their view range. Real time, instant perv sharing with your mates of similar persuasions, complete voyourism at its best.
I could go on but I wont. These things are game changers and make owning an iPhone look so last century.
Re: They don't JUST need a roadmap...
RE...(* The next big thing is... Winforms... oh no, sorry, it's actually Silverlight... oh no, sorry, it's actually WPF... oh no, sorry, it's actually RT...)
Yup, this has been the problem with windows and webby type stuff since about 2001. There's some bloke at MS (no names etc) who seems to think that he can save client server programmers by spinning out the same daft shit with different names. Every morning I wake up and mentally thank the MVC team from saving me from the stupid, backwards crap that MS has come up with ever since some pratt announced design time controls in Interdev.
yeah, well I went on Adobes's site the other week...
...using IE10 and I was told it wasn't a supported browser as it was too old. Curb the jokes people. Once I'd got on with FF and bought something, I was emailed, telling me that I'd have to wait 24 hours for the order to be approved. I phoned them up and laughed about it still being 1998 in Adobe land. You have to wonder WTF is going on with that bunch.
Anyway, back on topic, I'm surpised they didn't try to use an Active X control
Lolcats...a warning from history
I oan all yoos asses now
“On e-commerce platforms, every single transaction creates a record, and every piece of information about sellers of counterfeit products is traceable,” said Alibaba's chief risk officer Polo Shao.
I'm wetting myself. I don't think I've even done a transaction through Alibaba itself. Everyone uses bank transfers or letters of credit and emails after the initial contact. And if I can find a knock off of stuff that retails on Amazon (and was made in China anaway) at £2000 a pop for $200 on Alibaba and the quality is cool, I'm 'avin' it.
space.com explanation.... "But the truth is much more prosaic. The phallic shape naturally resulted when the six-wheeled Spirit, which was declared dead in 2010, made a turn."
I've heard this before..."I was hoovering naked when I slipped and..."
I think we should all email them the link to the picture of the cock on Mars
Seriously.... this is new?
Mobiles have always been ripped to shreds by FIS in governemnt. Take one to Russia and you have to bin it when you come back. The only difference is that before smart phones arrived en mass, you left the phone in a locker, didn't carry it about or used a throw away phone for the duration of the threat. Now, with smart phones everyone is up their own ass "to be in the loop" and want to carry the damn things everywhere, so security has been relaxed a bit.
For Joe Public, well they are always going to be ****ed over downloading all sorts of "apps" and for the bad man writer this is like the late 1990s all over again!
I had to read the last word in the first sentence twice
To wit...The user interface for Google's forthcoming tech specs, aka Google Glass, may feature a two-fingered salute and a wink.
Someone soon is going to get a right slap on the 8:15 from Dorking as the guy opposite the guy with Google Glass on thinks the other bloke is taking the piss with all the funny blinking.
As anyone who buys stuff from China knows..
quality control is a nightmare and unless you keep on top of it about 50% of goods delivered need to go back or put in the bin.
Talking through a hole in my spacetime...
I can see the case for zero dimensional particles that do not have "access" to the electromagnetic force and are heavily attracted to visible matter by gravity, cover visible matter like fur and would act as an exchange particle or... massive collapsed dimension particles that we are heavily attracted to, but that would mean that visible matter isn't attracted to visible matter but rather that visible matter is attracted to locations in space time (from our frame of reference). I.e. we are not attracted to the Earth, but to something at the centre of the Earth and it just looks like we are attracted to the Earth because other matter got there first. mmmmm...more coffee needed.
I always wondered how long it was going to take...
If you live in a "freedom loving democracy" and use TOR you are a terrorist or kiddy fiddler, or if you live in a "freedom loving democracy" and use TOR you are a freedom fighter or an oppressed victim.
In both cases, your government determines what "freedom" is and someone else's government determines your status.
Not another F*** Up!
I'm beginning to get really worried about Microsoft. It seems proper management has gone on a holiday and the staff are just screwing around. I've just created a .Net 4.5 app that was off the normal "get stuff from a database and show it" path and jesus it was a 'mare with MS bugs and gotchas, not to mention this whole .Net 4 open in VS 2010 and .Net 4.5 open in VS 2012 "don't cross the streams" Ghostbusters style malarkey.
After 14 years at the MS coalface, I might bail.
...that everyone is going to have a smart meter at home (with gov kill switch and a high per unit price tag) and a dumb meter in the street (cheap as chips and 24hr), mine's the van with the deep cell batteries in the back and a slightly open living room window to let the cable in.
So London will be saved!!
Well, that's alright then. Christ, I don't even need an aerial to receive some MUXes in London, so who the hell is going to have a signal booster within the M25? Maybe they should try it in somewhere remote, like err, Bedford where you really need a f**k off aerial per TV in order to get a signal (and even then it gets screwed when a bird sits on the aerial, never mind 4G), or maybe Kenilworth or some other remote outpost of the empire where existing freeview coverage is crap. Of course Scotland won't count (I'm Scottish, so I know this) and won't be able to get a signal at all if they ever roll out 4G there.... which they won't until at least 6G comes along.
Re: You Wot?
Just what I was thinking...mind you I suppose if they were running Android and had a billboard on the side then that would be OK then...
Pants down, pants down!??!
FFS...not only pants down but greased up and ready for a right good shafting. They're not describing a flaw, they're describing a ****ing great hole that you could herd elephants through. Data access to their entire database must have been built by an intern during his summer holidays or something.
Re: To ' or not to '. That is the question.
>>Why is the plural of iPhone iPhone's, but the plural of mobe isn't mobe's?
As I'm sure others will have pointed out but I can't be bothered to look, the plural of iPhone, is iPhones without an apostrophe. Why can anyone add an "s" to something without sticking an apostrophe in anymore?
The correct usage for the apostrophe is as the foillowing examples.
The iPhone's antenna is crap, means that the antenna of one iPhone is crap.
The iPhones' antenna is crap, means that the antenna of all iphones is crap.
Nope the DLL was $576 which converted to £377.78 (at 1.52) + £11.14 for a couple of electrons to do stuff and called a non sterling transact fee. Piss and taking spring to mind.
Thanks Eadon...I'm still working on it! Thing that still bugs the bejesus out of me is that if I'm in an expanding universe by travelling through time (standing stillish in space) and I then travel to a planet say 5 light years away (and therefore resisting expansion whilst doing so (time slowing down), have I actually travelled through space (i.e. a vector towards the planet at 90 degrees to expansion, if time was the y axis with x being space) or have I merely increase the length of my probability being someplace and that I haven't really moved along the x axis. This is what keeps me up!
I just bought a DLL the other week and the transaction was in US dollars. When I got my redit card bill the item was converted into sterling at the credit card's exchange rate as normal (obviously not in my favour) and then underneath that was £11 exchange rate conversion fee. I've never seen that before and will be having words.
OK...I apologise for my use of words. All I'm saying is that the particle "preceives" itself as a single thing whereas we perceive it as 2 things. The universe probably "perceives" it/them as the outliers of a line of probability which >>IMHO<<< has the properties of something moving very, very fast but because they/it are/is not, then the c rule doesn't get invoked.
I've never had a problem with this...
you can't go faster than c...fact
you can entangle 2 "particles" and if you change the state of one "particle" you change the state of the other, no matter (no pun) how far they are apart (OK 14km at the moment or so)....fact
Therefore we see 2 "particles" but the entangled "particle" only knows about itself, so you have to look at what's happening from the "particle's" reference point not from ours.
From a computing viewpoint, there are 2 threads which both are using the same object. A public property called X in the object sets and gets a value. X is currently 0. Thread 1 sets X with a value of 5, so the internal value of the object is now 5. Thread 2 gets X and strangely thread 2 finds X is suddenly 5 whereas thread 2 thought X was 0. Thread 2 is left scratching its head as it thought the 2 threads were separate but didn't realise that they were using the same object.
This issue is that we understand about threads (spacetime), the object doesn't so what's the problem?
At least they got their emails back unlike my GF
BT managed to lose all the emails in her inbox since the year dot and then said that they couldn't retrieve them because she didn't notice (i.e didn't log in) within 48 hours. Oh and she must have had her account hacked. She's now looking for a different ISP.
I just have this vision
....of massed fanbois with their heads bowed, playing with their rings (no, no, wait for it) as if they were magical prayer beads. iMonks for the cult of Jobs. Anyway I always thought that fanbois were perceived as too cool to be indoors watching TV like some pot bellied Sky-man.
As I've been sayin' for years...
Android is in reaility, just ActiveX 2.0. And look what happened there.
Maps is getting an update, primarily for Japan.
You mean Apple found out where it is..sorry couldn't resist
I just love the human spirit
Everytime some smartypants comes up with a control system, there's always someone someplace who's brain goes "clunk" and comes up with a "dumbass" workaround that the aforementioned smartypants never considered. Love it. Not thumbs down, just an action shot of the system in operation!
I can kip for 2 years whilst she does the cleaning! ONLY JOKING!!
Last thing you want on a 500 day mission is 2 blokes each trying to bash the bishop without the other one seeing.
Re: To further calms the nerves
Err...seemingly there was another big one over Japan and yet another over LA. The videos are on the internetty someplace.
I'm no nutter (well, maybe) but...
I get the impression that Nasa would say anything rather than give it a poke. If that rover came across some golden arches with a drive-thru (US English), Nasa would probably come up with some convoluted story rather than admit it was a McDonalds. Here we've got a planet with pretty much piss all atmosphere and suddenly it's able to polish hard objects better than a £5000 an hour hooker. My arse.
> cutting off telephone and internet connections to hundreds of homes and businesses
They got all BT's customers in one swoop!!
I hate Apple products,
I also hate Vodafone products
I'm beginning to feel a lot like Aldi
I'm registered with TPS and it is shite but...
The nuisance calls I get are all from BT wanting to flog me their Infinity. The other week they phoned me a 9 o'clock at night to try and flog the thing. You know what the moron at the other end said when I mentioned this... "it's only 5 to 9." KABOOM! I don't think they'll call back again.
In a nutshell, it's old fashioned and got...
...it's arse paddled when Kinect came out.These days, it looks like a poundland console.
- Analysis BlackBerry Messenger unleashed: Look out Twitter and Facebook
- Nine-year-old Opportunity Mars rover sets NASA distance record
- IT bloke publishes comprehensive maps of CALL CENTRE menu HELL
- Prankster 'Superhero' takes on robot traffic warden AND WINS
- British LulzSec hackers hear jail doors slam shut for years