* Posts by Ismael

25 posts • joined 29 Nov 2007

Google Slides away from Wave FAIL with social network buy

Ismael

Yeah

That's exactly what I thought...

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Observer columnist in online porn mixup

Ismael

He also misspeled

"shodul"

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Google code hints at Chrome OS Dellbook

Ismael

Why Google Print?

I mean, come on! If I have a printer right next to me, in the same network, why on hell would I send a document to the google servers so they can scan it, put some ads, and then give it to the printer do finally... print. The direct way is not faster, better and safer?

I was sceptic about all the soothsayers who screamed at their lungs that Google was bent do take it all to the internetz, and dominate and control everything, and eat our babies while whe where sleeping...

But now, I say: GOOGLE IS BENT TO TAKE EVERYTHING TO THE INTERNETZ! IT WILL DOMINATE AND CONTROL EVERYTHING! IT WILL EAT OUR BABIES! AND ALL OF THAT WHILE PUTTING ADS EVERYWHERE!

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Google to open source $124.6m video codec, says report

Ismael

Google doesn't need to support flash

If Google dumps Flash on Youtube, and IE simply doesn't support VP8, the mass will just pick whatever browser supports it.

Hey, look. Right at the side of the Google search page. There is a big button telling me to instal Chrome.

That's what people will do.

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One fifth of humans say aliens walk among us

Ismael
Alien

Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

Says it all:

http://www.smbc-comics.com/?db=comics&id=1192#comic

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Google Wave relies on kindness of strangers

Ismael

To get lots of people using google wave

They just need to stop being such shitheads and open the damn thing to anyone with an gmail account, instead of slowly releasing these stupid invitations.

I have an google wave account, but none of my friends have, so the stupid thing is useless for me.

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IT workers top UK inertia league

Ismael
Thumb Up

No shit Sherlock?

So, an IT person does less exercize than an Fitness Instructor?

Who would have thought that?

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Ubuntu man finds metalove in Debian attacks

Ismael
Linux

Why?

Well, I don't know if that's the opinion of the majority of linux users, but I would like to see Linux get more market share and become widespread just because then we would get some love from software makers.

I mean, surely, there is GIMP, but many, many people would like to use Photoshop. If Photoshop where available for Linux, maybe they would use it instead of buying overpriced Macs.

My girlfriend needs to use CAD applications for work, and so she's stuck with windows.

Maybe if Linux got some more market share, these softhouses would start making apps for it. And maybe, if these softhouses started making apps for Linux, Linux would get more marketshare.

And I'm not talking about "freetard". I mean, if we got to spend money on an windows copy, and more money on an AutoCAD copy, we would gladly spend money in an AutoCAD copy to run on Linux.

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Men far worse than women on password security

Ismael
Thumb Up

4

Women wear knickers. I have seen.

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BOFH: Hammer time!

Ismael

@previous poster

Just to be pedantic, there were many towers that fit under a desk and still give space for a cat to lay.

By the way, cats can bend and compress themselves so they can fit in just about any place, as small as it is...

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OMFG, what have you done?

Ismael
Joke

Fixed... Width??????

Have you just gone crazy?

I have an normal, 17" Monitor, but still near half my screen is occupied by ugly, grey bars.

The only explanation is an April 1st joke. Yes, that's it. El Reg just played us all an April's 1st joke.

The only flaw in this logic is that we aren't in April 1st...

Ok, I got it. El Reg editors are so smart that they know tha the readers will see an April 1st joke coming in an April 1st, so they decided to play the joke of 2009/04/01 today, more tha six months before.

Very, very cunning plan Baldrick...

Am I right?

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Japanese call on deities to discipline wayward PCs

Ismael
Paris Hilton

@Ron

That's right, there's a typo.

Everybody knows that the Shire is located at the northwest of the Fangorn Forest, near the vilage of Bree, across the Dark Forest.

There's no way the Shire can be located near Akihabara.

Paris, 'cause she has a crush on hobbits.

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BOFH: Lock and reload

Ismael
Thumb Up

On the queue

BOFHing people as a job? Where do I sign in?

By the way, it's good to read BOFH again after all this time. I was almost feeling... strange. A little nicer, gentler and kinder to other people. I was almost giving a crap abou my coworkers feelings!

But, thanks to Simon, everything is back to normal now. I think I'm gonna push someone down the stairs to celebrate this day.

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Google restores Chrome's shine

Ismael
Alert

AdBlock

come on, the sources of Chrome are BSD licensed.

anyone with some knowledge in programming (knowledge that i don't have) can get the sources and make an AdBlock extension or compile an version of Chrome with AdBlocking and distribute it, and it would not breach any licenses.

aaaannd... there's the hosts file, already mentioned. We use that to block sites like orkut in our custommers who don't have an proxy server and wouldn't like their employees browsing Orkut, Facebook or MySpace all day long.

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BOFH: Burying the hatchet

Ismael
Dead Vulture

NO BOFH

I... can't... live... (cough, cough) difficult... (cough) to breathe...

I need... some... BOFH

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Aliens, astronauts and Pope partition PC World

Ismael
Boffin

not at all

You can put a telescope in your room's window.

In that way, you can see the sky and it will not waste precious band or cpu cycles...

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Ian McKellen to reprise Gandalf

Ismael
Paris Hilton

How in the hell can you compare Tolkien to George Lucas?

I can imagine it...

Palpatine is Sauron, Darth Vader is the Witch King, Gandalf and Aragorn as Jedi Knights... Saruman with a stupid red and black mask and a dual bladed light staff.

"These are not the hobbits you are looking for", Orcs with stormtrooper suits, the Witch King revealing that he is Frodo's father. Hayred Ents speaking trough howls.

Man, that is an epic history indeed...

Paris, cause she's epic

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Department of Homeland Security website hacked!

Ismael
Linux

@TimM

the difference is that with a LAMP server you get weekly patches to fix the holes. With Microsoft products, you get monthly updates (at most) that just add more crap and security holes to your systems. Hence, the majority of the attacked systems run IIS and ASP...

A penguin. Cause they are cute, soft and secure...

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Enraged vegan spitroasts Reg hack

Ismael
Heart

The problem...

...is not the plain fact that veggans and vegetarians don't eat meat. The problem lies in the fact that more often than not, they go out of their way just to tell to the unwashed masses that their life style is better, and that veggies are the pinnacle of human race and meat eaters are just barbarians that delight in the suffering of animals.

Let's face it: You don't see non-veggies (the expression meat eater is a little bit untrue, as non-veggies eat vegetables and such) doing pickets (It's that the English expression? You know, that protests people do in front of some place just to piss of passerbys) in front of farms and such. But, on the other hand, we need to stand with veggies destroying markets, restaurants and even that thing people call "McDonald's", just because these places sell or serve meat.

Also, we don't see web banners saying "Eat meat! Become an Meat Eater! Show that you are superior by eating meat!". But there's plenty of banners telling you that veggies are superior.

So, I respect the decision of veggies of not eating meat, but they need to respect my decision, and the decision of manny millions of people of eating meat.

I know I'm a horrible, horrible cold-hearted butcher just because a like a good steak. You don't need to remind me everyday.

By the way, when we meet, my girlfriend was a veggie. She just didn't like the taste, smell and texture of meat. The explanation: from where she came (other city in the same State) they didn't have much tradition in preparing meat. After a month eating my Mommy's Super Delicious Meat(tm) she started to like meat.

An heart, because all the world needs now is love, sweet love (and bovine heart in a barbeque is a dellicacy).

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Dell makes exploited hamster cry

Ismael
Happy

@ Spleen

the Best Landscape winner is not about some anime girl projecting the force of nature trough her hands.

Is about some anime girl in short skirts pulling the pollution like some sort of curtain, just to reveal nature behind it.

I'm against all that hippie thing for the environment too, but I think we should be a little more concerned about that... Preferably in a non hipocrital fashion, of course...

And, all in all I really liked the Best Landscape. Is far more original that the grand winner (a little bit less commercial though...)

My English is crap. Probably I couldn't express what I was trying to say correctly, so, if you don't understand what I said, just ignore this post...

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Microsoft! bids! $44.6bn! for! Yahoo!

Ismael
Gates Halo

yeah, who Google think they are?

the only company that can hold a monopoly is Microsoft. In the online services area, we must have competition.

In the software area, not.

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Lightsaber voted top movie weapon

Ismael
Coat

The best

Django's coffin gatling gun.

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Car crash driver blames pterodactyl

Ismael

It's like in the movies

The man saw a Pderodactyl. Pderodactyls are secretly gathering to take over humanity. Nobody believes this man. We are here, all laughing from him.

Then, the pderodactyls strike. Millions of people die. This same man escapes from the sanatorium, gather a group of crazy people coming from all sectors of society (including the obligatory very hot bimbo, a rebel adolescent and a black man). All these people were absolutely normal, living normal lifes, but all of a sudden, they'll become expert in guns handling, ace drivers and explosive masters. They'll take down the pderodactyls. The black man, rebel adolescent, hot bimbo and a lot of extras will die so this man can accomplish his mission. The only survivor, besides him, will be a beautifull woman that doesn't like him, but as the days passes by his side, begins to love him madly.

All of this will happen in the USA, that we all know is the center of the world, so all invasions must start here. And, on the other hand, when the invaders in the USA are aniquillated, all of a sudden the invaders in all the world are destroyed too.

You'll see. Now, we laugh of this man. After a few months, the few of us that survive will praise him like a savior...

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Lindsay Lohan crowned 2007's worst actress

Ismael

@Christopher

I watched Transformers when I was very, very young, and I had a small VW beetle Bumblebee, and thought I was going mad, old and senile when I saw a Camaro turning into Bumblebee.

So, thanks to explaining that... now I can sleep peacefully again...

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Video games blamed for England Euro flop

Ismael
Joke

Re: bollocks

well, I'm Brazilian, and I always hated the way our best players are exported to Europe, leaving us with very, very crap teams.

so, I'm glad to see that the same things that make brazilian local teams crap make England football crap too...

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