* Posts by Eponymous Cowherd

1513 posts • joined 28 Nov 2007

Indiana Jones whips Bond in greatest movie character poll

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Ms. Fowler Was Wrong. Indy Did Make A Difference.

" On the other hand, it hardly needed a huge long discussion to determine that The Big Bang Theory is unfunny moronic shit that grossly misrepresents every aspect of the subject and people it depicts. For that it gets the nuclear blast icon, from which it shall not receive even the dubious protection of Dr Jones' refrigerator."

Errrm, please suggest a comedy that doesn't "grossly misrepresent" its subjects.

Oh, you want a "comedy" that accurately portrays the lives of physicists, IT techs (IT Crowd), hotel managers (Fawlty Towers), market traders (Only fools), A bunch of people in a pub (Friends, Coupling, etc), the Home Guard (Dad's Army), Irish matriarchs (Mrs Brown's boys), Space accident survivors (Red Dwarf), etc, etc, etc?

Wow. what a barrel of laughs those would be.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Ms. Fowler Was Wrong. Indy Did Make A Difference.

But without Jones the Nazis would have got the real headstock (medallion) and dug in the right place.

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Raising a stink in court: Innocent poo banditry warehousers win $2.2m

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: More common than you think

Ah,

Bought my first PC from them way back in 1994.

Complete pile of shit........

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Wake up, sheeple! If you ask Siri about 9/11 it will rat you out to the police!

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: And I was told (way back in the fifties)

There were a number of reasons why 999 was chosen:

Having three identical digits made it simple to create "emergency only" dials/phones.

So which digit to choose? Dial phones use loop-disconnect dialling at 10 pulses per second (pps). If a low number was chosen (particularly 1) it would have been possible to accidentally "dial" by jiggling the switchhooks. The ideal number would have been 0, but that is the STD prefix, so 9 was ne next best option.

Incidentally, in most old Strowger systems, you only had to dial "99" to get to the emergency operator.That was why the operator was often on the line as soon as you dialled the last 9 (of 3).

The "smoke filled room" thing came afterwards (after all, finding 1 or 0 on a rotary dial is easier).

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Amazon enrages authors as it switches to 'pay-per-page' model

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: So....

"This isn't about Amazon giving you a refund for your unused pizza, this is about Amazon keeping your money but then docking the kitchen staff's pay because they don't think that the pizza was good enough for you to eat it all at once."

No, this is more like Dominoes docking kitchen staff pay because the customer didn't eat all of their pizza, despite charging that customer for the whole pizza.

It doesn't matter why the customer didn't eat their pizza (maybe they just weren't as hungry as they thought) the staff still get their pay docked and the company still trouser the difference.

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Unable to log on to online games? Blame cheap-rate DDoSers

Eponymous Cowherd
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What the botherders need.....

is a +4 greatsword of flaming death shoved up their respective jacksies.....

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Gasping for an Apple Watch? You'll have to tremble and shake for two more weeks

Eponymous Cowherd
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Facepalm

Gasping for an Apple Watch?

Errm, no.

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Smartwatch biz Pebble says smartwatch biz Apple won't approve its new app – surprise

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Well done Apple!

Number of Apple Watches seen on wrists this week: 6

Number of Pebble Watches seen on wrists this week: 0

Number of Fords seen today, 100's

Number of Aston Martins seen today, 0.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Well done Apple!

You'd also be hard pressed to spot a Pebble Steel in a crowd. They look pretty much like a conventional watch, particularly if a digital face is being used.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Is this really going to affect many people?

What utter tosh.

I have a Pebble Steel and wouldn't swap it for either an Apple Watch or an Android Wear jobbie. It has an always on display (just like a watch), it is waterproof to 5atm, has a solid steel case and lasts 7 days on one charge.

It will also work with Android or iPhone and has a free and open API and a cloud based IDE for developing apps and faces.

Compare that to the Apple watch Sport which costs twice the price of the Pebble Steel. Non persistent display, Not waterproof, aluminium case, battery lasts less than a day. You can't write or obtain 3rd party faces and can only develop apps for it if you pay Apple for the privilege and own a Mac.

Not sure if you are just trolling or are such an ardent fanboi that you cannot comprehend that a competing product can be better than Apple's finest but, when it comes to the features that make a watch (smart or otherwise) usable and practical, the Pebble Steel wipes the floor with the Apple Watch, and for half the price of the cheapo "sport" model.

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Airbus promises Wi-Fi – yay – and 3D movies (meh) in new A330

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Bunch of bloody whiners

So you are happy being uncomfortable on a flight because, for you, that is the status quo?

Personally I'm 6'5" and 221lb and dislike economy air travel due to the lack of leg room. I also dislike economy rail and bus travel for exactly the same reason. The difference is I am usually only on a bus for 30 mins or so, or a train for a couple of hours max. 10 hours on a long-haul in an economy bucket is detestable.

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Silk Road boss Ross Ulbricht to spend LIFE in PRISON without parole

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Paul 87

"In a letter submitted to the court earlier this week, Ulbricht said he realized he had "ruined my life and destroyed my future" ... "Even now I understand what a terrible mistake I made," Ulbricht wrote in his letter."

Do we have a different definition of remorse and responsibility?

To me that reads like he is sorry he got caught and is sorry that his life has been destroyed. It shows little sign of remorse for his victims.

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Queen's Speech: Snoopers' Charter RETURNS amid 'modernisation' push

Eponymous Cowherd
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Unhappy

Tools

Here's a question to pose to Ms May should any of you be (un)lucky enough to meet her.

"Give me one, just one, scenario where the proposed measures could prevent a terrorist atrocity"?

As hard as I try, I cannot think of a single one. I can imagine how they might be used to bring accomplices to justice after an attack, but not to actually "keep us safe".

Add to that the fact that in every recent atrocity, the perpetrators were known to the authorities but couldn't be adequately monitored, despite being known risks, because of the lack of resources.

How they hell do they intend to "keeps us safe" from an unknown threat embedded in a humongous database of snoop data when they cant even protect us from the nutters they know about? Would it not be better to spend the money intended for this white elephant on some real human resources?

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UK safety app keeping lorries on the right side of cyclists

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: A good thing in principle, but

Indeed, if you are stupid enough to filter up the inside of a large vehicle at a corner you are asking for it.

The trouble is that far too often the driver, either due to impatience or inattentiveness, pass the cyclist and then turn immediately left.

This often happens at lights, particularly were there is an advanced stop box. The lights go green and the impatient driver, irritated at a "bloody cyclist" stopping in front of him or her accelerates past and cuts across left in front them.

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Enjoying the Spring? Microsoft has 13 ways to fix that

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: May's patches have been released?

May's patches? These are the patches that allow the Government to snoop on your activity on t'interwebs?

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Going up hills past blokes with coke-bottle legs: The Smart E-bike

Eponymous Cowherd
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Value for Money

I use a folding e-bike (a Byocycles Chameleon) to get to work. It is a budget jobbie at around £800, but has a 250W motor and a 36v 10Ah battery and will cruise at 17mph with a bit of light to moderate effort from me. It easily does the 20 mile round trip on one charge. I really don't see the point in paying an extra £1K for a bike that has poorer performance than mine.

The problem with e-bikes is that they all perform pretty much the same regardless of price. Spending £1800 on one is like buying a Porche and discovering it performs no better than a bottom of the range Dacia.

I believe that the UK has (last month) brought its e-bike laws into line with Europe, permitting 250W motors without throttle control unless type approved. Until then the limit in the UK was 200W, though most bikes sold as "legal" were 250W and the authorities turned a blind eye to avoid problems should they try to prosecute anyone.

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Poseidon's Wake, Naked at the Albert Hall and Farewell Kabul

Eponymous Cowherd
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Space elephants

Footfall (Niven and Pournelle) featured space elephants invading Earth.

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Apple to devs: Watch out, don't make the Watch into a, well, a watch

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Add fuel to the flames !

"Have disabled the "turn wrist to view" which is just irritating for me & have selected the "tap to display". Same applies to my wife."

Hell, I wish my wife was that understanding!!!

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Google TUGS Nexus 7-INCHER from its online store

Eponymous Cowherd
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Wrong Nexus

Google have pulled the plug on the 2013 Nexus 7, which doesn't have any problems with Lollipop. The 2012 version which, certainly, did have huge problems with it, was killed off in, surprise, surprise, 2013.

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Revealed: The AMAZING technology behind Apple's $1299 Retina MacBooks – a lot of glue

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Objection!

In the last year we have had four things die on us. Three were Apple (two MBPs and a Mini). The other was an 8 year old Dell Latitude (dead screen) which was repaired on site the following day.

One MBP we fixed ourselves (dead HDD, obviously not possible with the one in the article), the other two, despite being under warranty, required a 30 mile round trip (each) to the nearest Apple store.

Considering most of our kit is Dell (80%) and most of our failures are Apple I'd agree that Apple's vaunted reliability isn't all its cracked up to be.

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Radio 4 and Dr K on programming languages: Full of Java Kool-Aid

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: BASIC - Punk Rock!

Nah,

BASIC was the programming equivalent of the Bay City Rollers.

Assembly, now that was Punk.

LDIR

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Facepalm

Re: It could have been better without Aleks Krotoski

What, like Rory Cellen Jones?

What the BBC need is a tech correspondent who understands technology.

What I don't understand is that they use the likes of Brian Cox, Jim Al-Khalili, Michael Moseley, Janina Ramirez, and so on to present programmes about or around their own subject matter (hell, Dara O'Briain has a degee in theoretical physics), but when it comes to technology they think any clueless hack who happens to know how to use an iPhone, Facebook and Twitter will do.

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Fancy a wristjob from Tim Cook? TOUGH LUCK, you CAN'T HAVE ONE

Eponymous Cowherd
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Trollface

Re: Just goes to show...

"Why would anyone mug you for this watch? It's useless once it's taken off."

Same as when its on, then......

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Eponymous Cowherd
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I think whoever came up with the saying......

"There's one born every minute"

rather underestimated.

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Idiot thieves walk free after stolen iPad uploads pics of them with loot

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: The punishment

Its harsh compared to the punishment the little shitbags would have been handed in the UK. 30 hours of community service is about all they would get.

And as for paying back the victim. We regularly see reports of X caused £1000's damage, but gets ordered to compensate the victim a couple of hundred at a fiver a week.

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Toyota Yaris Hybrid: Half-pint composite for the urban jungle

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: I'm not convinced...

"As I said, that sort of makes sense. But an electric range of ONE MILE???? WTF are they thinking of?"

That is because you don't understand the idea of a hybrid. What you are thinking of is a plug-in hybrid, like a Vauxhall Ampera. In standard hybrids like this, the battery is used as a reservoir to hold energy recovered by regenerative braking, etc, so that it can be used for motive power and, therefore improve fuel consumption.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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How times change

This little city car has almost identical performance figures to a 1970 Mk3 Ford Cortina 2000 GT. Apart from fuel consumption which was in the region of 27mpg if you were careful.

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MENOPAUSAL KILLER WHALES are wise old birds, trick-cyclists claim

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: What about the elephants!

But they are, apparently, scared shitless by bees.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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My pants

are always short.

My trousers, however, are long.

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Why does the NSA's boss care so much about backdoors when he can just steal all our encryption keys?

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: We have RIPA

They can only demand a password if they know who to demand it from.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Of Geese and Ganders

Alex Stamos' point is particularly relevant. If the US can demand that all encryption used within it's borders contains a "back door", so can any other nation.

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$533 MEEELLION – the cost of Apple’s iTunes patent infringement

Eponymous Cowherd
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Live by the sword,....

die by the sword.

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Mégane Renaultsport 275 Trophy: Hands-on gizmo-packed motoring

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Oh dear

I have had 3 Renaults in my time.

A 1972 Renault 5 (9 years old at the time). Total brake failure (Master cylinder failed), just managed to stop in time with handbrake and furious pumping of the pedal. Steering rack jammed going around a corner, the wall I hit put it out of its misery.

A 1986 Renault 11 TXE Electronic (3 years old). Lovely car until the voice synth developed Tourette's syndrome. The light failure warning then kept claiming non-existent failures, the fuel flow meter failed, the sun roof started leaking and the oil level meter kept claiming low oil when it was fine. Then the cam belt snapped (after only being on the car about 18 months). 4 new pistons, 8 new valves and a big bill later, it got sold.

The last one was a 1989 Renault 25 TXE. Supposedly one of the worst vehicles Renault ever made, but mine was bomb-proof. Got it at 5 years old and kept it for 11 years. Never needed anything but servicing, tyres and brake pads in that time.

My worst car, by far, was a Ford Granada (1995, 6 years old when I got it). After 18 months it simultaneously blew a head gasket and autobox at the same time while on holiday. and needed a shedload of remedial work at the two MOTs I put it through.

My least favourite care was my 2003 Peugeot 406 estate. Nothing wrong with it, per-se, I just hated driving the thing.

My favourite car is my current one. A Kia Cee'd CRDi Estate (currently 5 years old). Had it two years, faultless in that time and I find it really nice to drive.It, obviously, won't win any races, but I can get out of it after a 500 mile trip feeling as comfortable as when I got in. With any other car I've had, my back would be aching after 100 miles, and agony after 200, irrespective of how I adjust the seat. On paper its a pretty basic vehicle, but is certainly the most comfortable car I have had. The 60+ mpg is a bonus, too.

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Amazon's delivery drones SHOT DOWN by new FAA rules

Eponymous Cowherd
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Terminator

Re: Emergency control

OK? Would the downvoting twatspanner care to explain how this post is inaccurate, as you can only be disputing its accuracy as my post is non-partisan with regard to whether delivery (or any other kind of drone) is a good/bad idea?

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Issues

Not to mention the "Buy a book and get a free drone" factor.

Drone? I ain't seen no drone.......

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Alternative

Automated Delivery System

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Emergency control

"As long as the fully automated drone has the capability for the user to override and take emergency control then it still fine - I very much doubt there are any drones which don't full into this category."

The Parrot AR Drone 2.0 doesn't fall into that category. If you control it via MAVLink / QGroundControl instead of using Parrot's proprietary Wi-Fi protocol then it will happily continue flying along its waypoints after it has lost its control link.

As fas as I know this is true of all UAV's which utilise MAVLink (e.g. Arducopter, etc).

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ATTENTION SETI scientists! It's TOO LATE: ALIENS will ATTACK in 2049

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Interesting

Well, the theory is that any race that has survived long enough to develop interstellar travel will have outgrown petty vices like war, genocide, galactic domination, that sort of thing.

Either that, or they have exterminated all opposition and are looking for their next "challenge"....

Not that we'd be much of a challenge to a race of highly advanced, power hungry, genocidal super-strong beings bent on galactic domination.

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FOCUS! 7680 x 4320 notebook and fondleslab screens are coming

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: An 8K fondleslab?

Well, I assume that it will use the dpi of the screen to render sensibly, but at 960dpi (or around 38 pixels per mm) for an iPad fitted wit an 8K screen,I cant see (or,literally, won't be able to see) the benefit over the existing 264dpi "retina" display.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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WTF?

An 8K fondleslab?

As an everyday user, this gets me what, exactly?

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EE 'best' of the UK mobile network bunch, but how good is that?

Eponymous Cowherd
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Value for money

Three are a very close second in most tests, but are far better value for money in that they offer 4G at no extra cost and all-you-can-eat data at very reasonable rates.

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Smartphones don’t dumb you down, they DUMB you UP

Eponymous Cowherd
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Joke

Re: Alistair (was:Whatever.)

""OH, It's SONOMA! Heart of California's wine country!" isn't an answer. Because it's not."

You mean "whine" country, surely.

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Post-pub nosh neckfiller: The Red Dwarf chilli chutney egg sarnie

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Student fayre

Ah, lime pickle. Truly the food of the gods, though I prefer the Patak's stuff myself.

Our local Pizza 'n' Kebab joint does a kebab meat and chilli sauce pizza. Delicious and something, I'm sure, Dave Lister would approve of.

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'If someone in Australia says lick my toad, it's not a euphemism'

Eponymous Cowherd
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Re: Marmite?

There was an article on the PM programme the other day about the burgeoning black market for "real" Cadbury chocolate from the UK or Ireland since Hershey have been granted an embargo on retailers selling the real thing.

I recently was offered some "cadbury" chocolate while in the US. I have eaten Hershey chocolate before and found it fairly unpleasant, but when you take a mouthful expecting the creamy smooth taste of a chunk of Cadbury's and instead get the sickly sweet taste and plasticky texture of Hershey it honestly tastes like you have popped a lump of solidified puke into your mouth.

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Zoinks! Is that Mystery Machine Apple's SELF-DRIVING FAMILY WAGON? You decide

Eponymous Cowherd
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The Apple iCar

this will, obviously be the most beautiful vehicle ever seen on the road. It will have the lines of a Ferrari coupled to the passenger capacity of an MPV, will have a top speed in excess of 200mph and hit 60 faster than a Nissan GT-R, It will, of course, be a ZEV, but the battery will be non-replaceable and will need recharging every 20 miles at propitiatory Apple charging stations. You will not be able to charge it at home without buying an approved charging adaptor for £/$Stupid.

The windscreen(shield) will, obviously, crack at the impact of large bees.

Like all other Apple products, it will not be waterproof, or even mildly shower resistant, and will conk out if you drive it in the rain (voiding the warranty in the process)

You will, obviously, only be permitted to travel along Apple approved routes.

Once Apple get the iCar to market, they will, rightfully, sue Ford, GM, Nissan, etc for the temerity of stealing their idea of "A road vehicle with a wheel at each corner"

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Windows tablet price war FINALLY has 'em prying open wallets

Eponymous Cowherd
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Holmes

Microsoft in "Stuff is worth whatever people are willing to pay for it" shocker

Title, pretty much, says it all.

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Horrifying iPhone sales bring Apple $18bn profit A QUARTER

Eponymous Cowherd
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Facepalm

Whoosh

That was the sound of irony shooting over your head.....

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Switch it off and on again: How peers failed to sneak Snoopers' Charter into terror bill

Eponymous Cowherd
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Mushroom

Bullshit

"Before Paris and Belgium, the government raised the threat level to severe. Intelligence showed what might be coming. We could easily have been Paris or Belgium. Thankfully, so far we have not been exposed in the same way, except for the tragedy of Fusilier Rigby, but it is a very brave man indeed who says that at the present time we would not be."

This sort of bullshit really annoys me. Not sure if the people who spout this nonsense are really that inordinately stupid, or are just hoping that if they spout this bollocks often enough the Great Unwashed will swallow it.

The filth that carried out the Paris atrocities and the murder of Lee Rigby were known to the security services. The fact that they managed to carry out their attacks is down to mistakes by and/or under-resourcing of the aforementioned security services. Having data on every man, woman, child, cat, dog and, for all I know hamster's Internet activity wouldn't have made a jot of difference.

Why is it so buggering difficult for these twatspanners to grasp that there is no point in slurping zettabytes of additional data when the data they already have on people who are known threats are already overloading the people whose job it is to protect us from those threats.

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Eponymous Cowherd
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Big Brother

Re: Organising the Techies

While avoiding the snoopers charter infrastructure wouldn't be that difficult, what is really needed is to make that avoidance plug and play.

Gargoyle supports TOR via a plugin, and you can configure it to route data from your LAN over TOR by default, so that nothing from your home network can be "snooped".

So what we need are broadband routers that offer TOR connectivity out of the box (without having to flash a 3rd party replacement OS) and which can be bought from your local PC World.

TOR, of course, has demonstrable weaknesses, so research into a more secure anonymising network (TOR2?) which could be implemented in hardware / firmware on off-the-shelf routers would be a laudable goal.

Kickstarter, perhaps? A secure broadband router that protects you against Government snooping? Reckon that'd sell.

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Will fondleslab's fickle finger of fate help Windows 10?

Eponymous Cowherd
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Holmes

Will the fickle finger of fondleslab fate help Windows 10?

No.

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