Posts by Thomas
51 posts • joined Thursday 22nd November 2007 13:33 GMT
Not bad....
....but I've seen better.
Almost every single broadband company I've been under has suggested visiting their technical support website when my connection drops out.
We really need a fail icon of some sort.
A whole new martial art...
I know Chav-fu!
@The Fuzzy Wotnot
"sheeple"
I normally abhor internet contractions but this one is really good. I suspect in many sheeple's pockets, you will find a copy of the Daily Fail.
In other news...
Several key members of staff from the Office for National Statistics were found strangled today. Police say the only lead they have is a recorded conversation in which the killer states, "I find your lack of faith disturbing."
More at ten.
Posted in Juror tweets could force retrial
/facepalm
One day people will begin to realise that the oh-so-annonymous comment you post on your Twitter feed or Failbook account THAT HAS YOUR NAME IN HUGE LETTERS OVER IT *will* eventually bite you in the ass...
Twit-O-Tron strikes again!
I have a cure for World of Warcrack....
And its called Wrath of The Lich King.
Seriously, 2 months after installing it, I can't even face logging into the game now =/.
@Gerry
I beg to differ, sir.
I never knew a Samsung Cricket could actually fit up the anal passage - a most beneficial lesson indeed.
Posted in Red Dwarf finally returns to Earth
As long as its not like Series 7....
....This is some awesome news.
@Simon
Windows Repair fixes all your problems!
Unless you happen to be dealing with a wireless network, Vista and a Belkin N Router, in which case contact the person who administrates your network.
Maybe they should have that as a new system error message for Windows 7 "Well, I made a half-assed attempt to fix your network but after switching the adaptor on and off I'm out of ideas. Over to you."
Posted in BBC relives The Day of The Triffids
@BBC Sci Fi
You don't work for the BBC do you? Because that sounds frighteningly accurate.
My nomination
I would take the curious language that has evolved from World Of Warcraft as my nomination.
Then I'd take that nomination, stuff it into a rocket and fling it into black hole.
Posted in Beeb gets its rocks off in Second Life
Hmmm
El Reg used to have a Sadville correspondant at some point. I wonder what happened to her, although I imagine it was probably nothing a) good or b) suitable for family viewing.
In other news....
...a ten year old boy was recently arrested for the savage murder of a priest. Revelling in his shameless murder of a Warrior Priest of Sigmar, witnesses claim that he bellowed "LULZ PWNED UR AZZ" and spared no thought for his innocent victims friends or family, who are believed to be devestated by the death.
Posted in Google fixes world's most stupid bug
A friend of mine just got a G1...
...and I look forward immensely to tormenting him with this.
So that's what the infamous Miss B looks like...
Liked the website btw.
Posted in Ledger zombie pizza promo pulled
Which is the odd one out?
Heath Ledger, as he's the only one to have been interviewed by that bastion of good taste known as Jonathan Ross.
Thank you.
A worrying trend for the future
I really hope the Yoof of Taday (tm) doesn't get influenced by Fallout 3 otherwise they'll be running around setting off nuclear warheads at the behest of anyone in a dodgy business suit.
Any chance of a mushroom cloud icon?
Posted in Sarko demands withdrawal of voodoo doll
He's bluffing....
Someone's needling him and he responds with a stab in the dark.
@Damn
So what have you been usi....never mind.
A Sony PDA/Smartphone that doesn't use MS?
I think I saw Satan skating to work this morning....
Posted in Wireless power delivery gets blended
"... our feet surrounded by transformers..."
Optimus Prime, for a start.
Posted in Space tourist docks with ISS
Tabula Rasa
Yeah, he did do an MMO - quite a reasonable one actually.
I, for one, welcome our Bane overlords and hope they don't annihilate RG's shuttle in hail of plasma death.
Posted in Verity's further education
What a mess....
I hope it all works out for you in the end, V.
OU really is not doing itself any favours through this.
Posted in Serial commentard bitchslaps Reg hack
He is quite correct you know...
Winners don't use Pole.
Posted in No takers for Huawei handset division
Owner of a Huawei USB modem
No wonder they can't find a buyer, their modems can't find a signal worth shit.
Rapturous idea
We'll all end up smacking the stuffing out of divers with scary little girls chasing after us with huge syringes.
Posted in Reg competition: Cisco goes isup
Resident Evil
I suspect the work of the T-Virus.
An evil affliction that strikes innocent webpages and corrupts them into something horrible while hordes of zombified "t"s run rampant, infecting innocen websie....
tt
ttttt
THEY'RE HERE! Run for the hills!
Posted in LHC downed until after Xmas - Boo
Terrific article!
Any chance we could sort out some sort of caffinated beverage-based IV system for Mr Page?
Concerned about Daily Fail hacks....
I really worry about these guys sometimes. They write the most depressing and despairing stories day in, day out. Have you thoughtless swine ever given any thought to how hard their lives must be?
"Well, first of all I wrote about paedos running rampant, then about the collapse of financial stability and I still need to finish the global warming and the "Fruit gives you cancer" stories. Oh, and can you send the cynaide my way once you're finished with it, or shall I retrieve it from your corpse?"
Posted in Hammer Films has risen from the grave
Fangs For The Memory...
Finally!
A horror film I can get my teeth into!
Mines the one with the foldout vampire wings.
Posted in David Blaine does a Benito Mussolini
<Insert publicity seeking title here>
Batty stunt.
'Nuff said.
Posted in EA in Spore DRM climbdown
Can I talk about Steam?
I bought the Orange Box 4 weeks ago.
I still haven't been able to play it offline.
Criminals don't have to put up with this shit.
*Insert flame war here*
Any chance of a fanboy icon? Perhaps a picture of a geek frothing at the mouth like Cujo.
Where's the IT angle???
There is no IT angle to this story. What is it doing here? I am removing The Register from my bookmarks. Please cancel my subscription. I am also dissatisfied with today's weather. Please make the weather the way I like it. Goodbye.
'Nuff said.
To all those that think this book has a hope in helll..
3 words:
Kevin
J.
Anderson
'Nuff said =/
And we all know what happens next....
FACEBOOK: THE COMPUTER GAME
Essentially a shoddily executed platform game developed in the space of 3 weeks.
Posted in Kids may benefit from mobiles in class
Nothing new
I actually did an article about this a few years back for All About Symbian, detailing how various phones could be beneficial to university students.
Posted in Alan Sugar leaves Amstrad
First computer
Yup, my first one was a CPC6128 - lasted me for about 10 years. I'm damn lucky if I can squeeze 2 years out of the laptops I use these days.
I was also about one of the 20 people to buy a GX4000 - Amstard's answer to the Megadrive and Nintendo. A grand total of some 20 or so games, which makes it marginally more successful than the Gizmondo.
I also used to read Amstrad Action and there was a less than flattering comic strip at the back about Mr Sugar - Sugarman, or something like that.
The way of the future.
Every office should have a chainsaw wielding roboboss. Preferably convinced about cost cutting measures in the HR department.
I want a gig like this
So these researchers were paid vast sums of money to do the research and the best they could up with was "Hey, gay men and straight women tend to think along the same lines?"
O RLY?
Posted in Nvidia launches GTX 200 series GPUs
The bleeding edge of GFX development....
Can it run Crysis yet?
Huzzah for half-assed ineffectual public bodies!
@A Baird
I have a 3G modem from Vodafone - I'm just waiting to hear from them why my latency is 2569ms on HSPDA connection speed and 800ms on 2G.
Should make for good reading ^^
Posted in Acer punts £199 Linux laptop
Looks promising...
Any chance of a full review when the vultures get their claws on it? Also, which version of Linux is it or is it an in-house version like on the Eee?
Hooray, another Xbox vs PS3 topic
El Reg should be putting their comment mods on hazard pay for dealing with threads like these...
@ Mike Richards
"Any chance the Reg and its readers could help sponsor some of the work to save the vultures?"
I whole-heartedly agree with this idea - I'm sure there are a few captive breeding programmes running, even one or two in the UK and a Paypal link pledging a quid or two to such a program would go for miles with the number of hits El Reg gets in a week.
Btw, does El Reg's Vulture actually have a name?
Posted in US woman launches 'Taserware' parties
re: Josh and Jon
I wholeheartedly echo the sentiments these guys made. The phrase "shooting yourself in the foot" came into being for a reason, you know.
Jerk
Michael Bay lost all credibility with me when he transformed a beloved children's cartoon series into American Pie with an overdose of CGI.
'Nuff said.
